Title: Lost Among The Stars

Summary: When Major Evan Lorne is attacked on a mission off-world, a series of events is put into motion that reveals the very secret John Sheppard had worked so hard to keep hidden. Eventual Sheppard/Lorne. Spoilers for "Coup d'etat" and "Doppleganger".

A/N: I'm back! Sorry about the delay but I am in the middle of moving so everything is a little hectic right now. Anyway, this chapter is heavily based on the SGA episode Doppleganger. It's one of my favorite episodes in the series. You will probably notice that a lot of the dialogue mirrors that of the original episode, but I have changed some of the major details and bended it to fit my alternate reality that I have created for Lost Among The Stars.

Well, I hope you like reading this chapter as much as I had fun writing it! Enjoy!

Characters: Evan Lorne, John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Ronon, Teyla, Elizabeth Weir, Sam Carter, Radek Zelenka, Jennifer Keller, and other minor characters and OCs.

Disclaimer: all rights belong to MGM.

Warning: mentions of non-consensual rape.

~o~o~

It was late at night when John and Ronon found themselves in the gym. Neither man could sleep and so, fully intending to be productive, they made their way to the training mats. Bantos rods were their weapon of choice.

The gym was stifling. Humidity seeped from every corner. John felt as though he was melting. Perspiration rolled off his brow, obscuring his view from time to time. In between rounds he used a towel to dry himself. Ronon, however, barely broke into a sweat. It was a testament to his Satedan endurance.

For an hour the gym echoed with the thwack of wood hitting wood. Occasionally the hollow thuds would be replaced with the smack of wood on flesh. More often than not it was also followed by cursing, mostly from John.

With a roar, Ronon rushed John, his bantos rods raised. Prepared to defend himself, John blocked the weapons with his own, aligning them in front of his chest. Pushing them away with a mighty thrust, the soldier twirled around. He brought one rod up to strike Ronon's neck while he lowered the other to hit his thigh. Expecting the move, Ronon blocked the rods while sticking out his foot to trip John.

John feigned a collapse, bowing down to his knees. Ronon stepped back, waiting for his sparring partner to recover. While he moved back John jumped up, thatching his bantos into a cross and forcibly pushing them into Ronon's stomach. Taken by surprise, the Satedan warrior stumbled back and barely had time to block John's next strike. But, in his preoccupation to regain his footing and catch the banto rod aimed at his shoulder, Ronon completely missed the second rod speeding toward his head. A sharp pain suddenly sprouted from his forehead. Grunting, Ronon fell onto his ass.

"Chewie, you okay?" John panted, concerned when he witnessed blood begin to flow from a deep cut on his teammate's brow.

"Yeah," Ronon huffed.

"That doesn't look pretty," the Colonel admitted. He held out his hand to the downed Satedan. Ronon accepted it and hauled himself off the mats.

John collected their bantos rods and put them back in the corner. He picked up his towel and, slapping Ronon on the back, said, "Let's get you to the infirmary, big guy."

Sniffing in distain, Ronon reluctantly agreed and followed John out of the gym. It didn't take the duo very long to arrive at the infirmary. The place was mostly empty. Not immediately spying the nurse on duty, John spun in a circle until he caught sight of Jennifer out of the corner of his eye. Nudging Ronon in the Doctor's direction, the two men silently walked over.

Their sudden appearance must have startled Jennifer because when she turned around she emitted a high-pitched squeak. Her hands flew up to defend herself. In her right fist she gripped a bottle of sleeping pills.

John immediately noted that Jennifer was not on duty. She was wearing pajamas, a low-cut pink shirt with blue flannel bottoms.

"Sorry, doc, didn't mean to scare you," Ronon grumbled.

Moving her hands to clench at her heart through the thin material of her sleepwear, the Doctor stared up at the Satedan's bloody forehead.

"We were sparring and I got in a lucky shot," John explained.

Jennifer frowned, confusion flittering across her delicate features. "It's in the middle of the night…"

"Maybe for you," Ronon snorted in response.

Sighing in defeat, Jennifer responded, "Sit down," she motioned to the infirmary bed beside her, "let's have a look." The Doctor pulled on a pair of latex gloves and examined the cut further. Jennifer glanced over at John in disapproval before she told Ronon, "You're going to need stitches."

John grimaced, anxiously biting at his thumb nail, while the Satedan replied, "Guess I taught him too much, huh?"

"Yeah, I guess so," she said, turning back to look at the bleeding man before her.

"You know, you don't need to stick around," Ronon told the Colonel. "I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." The injured warrior paused before stating, "I want a rematch tomorrow."

John grimaced, "Yeah, that's what I was afraid of." Taking one final moment to glance between the two, he uncrossed his arms. And, saying good-night, he fled the scene.

Now, with the loss of his sparring partner, John had nothing to do. Well, he could go back to bed but he knew it would be impossible to sleep with all the adrenaline still coursing through his system. So, with little else to do, he settled on going to the cafeteria to grab a midnight snack. The cafeteria was always open. It had to host all of the city's residents, no matter the shift or unusual habits they occupied. Around-the-clock food was one of John's favorite aspects of Atlantis. Well, that and all the pretty toys he got to fly.

There were only three other people in the cafeteria when John arrived: two Marines and a scientist. The Colonel assumed the Marines had just been relieved of duty. Their shoulders slumped with fatigue while dark bruises began to form under their eyes. The scientist, on the other hand, was too alert. She was obviously there to sate a caffeine addiction.

Grabbing a coffee and small bowl of alien fruit, John made his way toward the balcony, fully intending to eat under the stars. As he passed the Marines they sluggishly issued a proper salute. The scientist just fliched and mumbled something unintelligible before slurping down the rest of her brew.

Ever since he had flown Atlantis this new planet to escape from the Replicators, John hadn't had a chance to gaze at the stars. But now he just began to notice it. Here, on Atlantis, the stars seemed closer. Bigger and brighter. Sparkling in the sky behind the two moons. Two moons, imagine that. It was a different sight to behold. One that John supposed he would never tire of seeing.

A swatch of purple nebula joined with the blacks and blues of the night sky. The swirling mix of color ebbed and flowed in a mesmerizing fashion. Forgetting his snack, John settled down to watch the show. It reminded him of the Aurora Borealis. But this was better because, as far as he knew, he was its only witness.

Hypnotized by its movement, John became lost in the magnificence of the cosmos. He wanted to rush to the nearest Jumper and join the stars. To run from his problems, and his feelings. To simply fly.

The color swelled again, twirling faster than before.

And then, suddenly, John felt very insignificant. He chest constricted and an icy feeling rushed to every appendage. His heart thudded. It was if a cold hand had reached inside him and trapped his heart in its icy grip. A tightness. Squeezing. Threatening to crush him.

Never before had he felt so small. Not when he couldn't save Holland. Not when he saw Nancy leave for the last time. Not when he thought Lorne had died in a fire. Not when he shot Colonel Sumner. Not even when he crumbled under the weight of his father's disappointment after he quit school and joined the Air Force. No, nothing manmade could make him feel this way. And, for some reason, that thought was terrible and beautiful all at once.

John sucked in a deep breath. For the briefest of moments a wayward shooting star made its way across sky. Its flaming tail cut through the purples and blues and blacks. The colors dissipated. The feeling faded. The show ended.

A numb feeling washed over him. Wishing to further his tranquility, John remained seated. He went to take a sip of his coffee but discovered it had long went cold. It would be daylight soon. And with the morning came the bustle of a busy city.

He stayed there for another hour and watched the sunrise over the grand spires of Atlantis.

~o~o~

The cafeteria eventually became too noisy for John. So making a strategic retreat, the Colonel escaped into the maze-like hallways of Atlantis. Avoiding transporters, he took the longest route back to his room. His goal was to shower and change his clothes before joining Sam and the other senior staff for their weekly meeting.

John sauntered into the crew quarters' artium. The common area was fairly crowded at this time in the morning. The crew on night shift was just returning to their rooms while the remaining personnel made their way to the cafeteria for breakfast. John passed Teyla and Kate who had just reached the bottom of the main staircase leading to the transporters. Both women appeared to be in deep conversation. Not wanting to break up their discussion, the Colonel simply nodded to them in greeting.

Suddenly the familiar click of a disengaged gun safety echoed throughout the atrium. All movement and noise seemed to come to a stand-still. Shoulders tense, John turned to face the source of the sound. He was surprised to see Lorne aiming his service weapon at his head.

"Major?" John asked, confusion littering his usual easy-going tone.

Lorne blinked several times. His brow was shiny with sweat. His grip slightly wavered in hesitation. His pupils were dilated. His bare toes curled on the cold floor. His mouth curved down into a frown. His fingers edged toward the trigger.

"Where is he?" Lorne demanded.

"Who?" John asked. In the background he heard an off-duty Marine call security on his headset. In his peripheral vision he witnessed Teyla and Kate move to his side.

"Whatever is bothering you, Major, I'm sure we can talk about it," Kate said calmly, opening her hands in the universal sign of surrender.

Lorne ignored her, keeping his gun trained on his commanding officer. "Where is he? I know he's here?"

The Colonel shook his head. "Who? Who's here?"

"Baltier," Lorne spat.

John shivered. The name brought the sickening memories of PXK-233 to the front of his mind. The negotiations. The festival. The kidnapping. The assault.

Teyla stepped forward and spoke, "Baltier? No, that man is not here. That is impossible."

"Really?" Lorne asked, dropping his weapon several inches until it was aiming more at John's feet than his head.

"Yes," Teyla continued, "there is no way he could be here. No one has traveled to or from PXK-233 since our last visit."

The Major seemed to consider this. He closed his eyes, murmuring to himself. He swayed slightly, either in relief or fatigue John did not know.

With the man distracted, the Colonel moved to grab his own weapon in his holster. He had no intention of actually shooting Lorne. No, not at all. But there were civilians in the area. It was his duty to protect them, even from his own soldiers. Security was beginning to arrive. John internally cheered for their quick response.

Just then Lorne's eyes snapped back open. "No!" He raised his gun again, this time pointing it at John's chest. "No, don't move or I'll shoot."

John raised his hands, palms open and outward. "Okay, okay, no need to shoot anyone."

The Major licked his lips. "Baltier is here. I know he is."

"How do you know?" Kate asked softly.

"I smell him." And then, speaking more to himself than anyone else, he whispered, "Coffee and peppermint."

John flinched, knowing it was him that Lorne smelled. The Colonel had meant to change his shampoo and aftershave so he wouldn't trigger any relapses. Unfortunately, the Daedalus had not made any supply runs recently, and the whole thing had simply slipped John's mind. He was severely regretting it now.

"I won't let him take me. You can't make me go with him," Lorne asserted, baring his teeth aggressively.

"No, no one will let him take you," Teyla assured him.

"He will," Lorne nudged forward with his weapon. "Colonel Sheppard is helping him."

"What?" John gapped. "I would never!"

"Shut up!" Lorne all but screamed.

Something was seriously wrong. Well, more wrong than his second in command holding him at gunpoint. No, for Lorne to think him aiding and abetting that man, he could not be in his right mind. It was wrong. All wrong. And John had to get to the bottom of this. "Put down the gun, Major. Let's talk this out."

"Corporal, get a search party together," Lorne ordered, glancing sideways at one of the Marines. The soldier lifted his P-90 so its muzzle was aimed at the Major's heart. Lorne barely blinked when the Marine did not respond. "And someone put Colonel Sheppard in a holding cell…"

"You talk to me, Major," Kate said. Lorne turned his gaze back to the Doctor. "Tell me what is going on?"

"Just do it!" Lorne ordered again. "What's the harm? He needs to be out of the way so we can find Baltier."

"John-" Teyla started to say.

Lorne snapped. "Don't talk to him!" He shook his head feverishly, the finger tightening on the trigger.

Silence reigned. The atrium's occupants held their breath. Everyone was tense, waiting for the ball to drop. Or, in this case, the gun to fire. John gulped, fearful that Lorne might actually shoot him. "Look, Lorne, I don't know what's gotten into you…"

"Me? No no no no no no, it's not me."

Then Sam appeared, making her way down the main staircase. "Major, why don't you lower your weapon," she spoke firmly, more of a command than a suggestion.

Lorne frowned. "No, Baltier is on Atlantis. Sheppard's helping him. He's going to take me away." Sam said nothing. "What, you don't believe me? Okay, I'll shoot him, you'll see!"

"Woah, woah that's not necessary," John said, bringing the attention back to him. He raised his open palms higher. "I've just got my hands up in a very non-threatening way."

Scared for the Colonel, Sam declared, "I've called for a search party."

John opened his mouth in astonishment. "You believe him?"

"No, of course not," Sam replied, "but it won't hurt you and it might help him to lower his gun."

"No! You're helping him, too!" Lorne move his sidearm to aim at Sam's chest, it stayed there a few seconds before it traveled back to John. "I won't go. You can't make me." Then the weapon was trained back on Sam. "I'll shoot you. I'll shoot you both!"

But Lorne never got the chance to follow through on his threat. A red light suddenly slammed into his chest. The Major convulsed, his gun dropping harmlessly from his limp hand. Watching Lorne fall unconscious, John turned his gaze to the balcony above him. There Ronon stood, his own blaster trained on the twitching form on the ground.

With the rogue soldier out of the picture, the atrium exploded. People began leaving in a hurry, desperate to get away from the apparent mad man. Security moved in closer in an attempt to control the situation. Everyone was talking all at once, trying to figure out what just happened.

"I take it I do not have to lock you in our holding cells, Colonel?" Teyla asked.

John did not turn to look at his Athosian teammate. "No thank you, Teyla." Not taking his eyes off Lorne, he watched as a set of Marines pick up the limp body. Addressing the soldiers, he ordered, "Bring him to the isolation room in the infirmary."

"Yes, sir," one of the men replied.

"Should he be restrained?" Sam asked.

Before John could answer, Kate responded, "I don't think that will be necessary, Colonel Carter." The Doctor looked thoughtful. She clearly knew more about Lorne's strange behavior than she was letting on. She tapped her chin in contemplation before requesting, "Could I talk to him when he wakes up?"

Sam nodded. "Of course, Dr. Heightmeyer."

~o~o~

When Lorne woke he didn't immediately recognize his surroundings. His vision was fuzzy and his body tingled. Pins and needles. What happened? Was he stunned? Where was he? He slowly reached up and groggily whipped the sleep from his eyes.

"Major Lorne?" a voice spoke.

Groaning, he opened his eyes again. He was surprised to find himself in the infirmary's quarantine quarters. He was sitting in a steel chair. Across from him was Kate, resting in her own seat. A metallic interrogation table acted as a barrier between them.

"Dr. Heightmeyer?"

"Major Lorne, how are you feeling?"

"Like I got stunned… What happened? Why am I here?"

She peered at him, concerned. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"I finished some reports in my office and then I went to bed."

"Have you been taking the sleeping pills you received from Dr. Keller?"

"Yeah, two a night." Lorne furrowed his brow. "Doc, what's with the questions? What's going on?"

"I'll explain in a moment," Kate calmly stated, "but first I need you to answer one more question. And please answer honestly."

Still confused, and desperately wanting to know what was happening, Lorne responded, "Of course. What is it?"

"When was the last time you had a sleepwalking incident?"

The Major blinked. "I haven't had one since I last saw you. Why?"

Kate sighed. "About an hour ago you held Colonel Sheppard at gunpoint." Lorne gaped at her. Whatever he was expecting her to say, that was not it. "You claimed that Baltier was here on Atlantis and that Colonel Sheppard was helping him," she continued.

"I what!?" He nearly jumped out of his chair in shock.

"You seemed to be having a very vivid nightmare," the Doctor explained. "You reacted violently. You almost shot him and Colonel Carter."

Lorne ran his hands through his short, brown hair. "No, no that can't be right. I would never do that. I would never…"

"Major Lorne," Kate soothed, "I believe you." She reached across the table and took one of his shaking hands. "But, you need to understand, this is serious. Now, we think that you might not have been acting under your own volition."

"What do you mean?"

"Several other people have recently had nightmares," she said. "In all of them, Colonel Sheppard has appeared as a very negative presence."

"Yeah, I remember Teyla telling us that she had a nightmare yesterday…" Lorne looked at her curiously. "You think these are connected?"

"Possibly," she replied. "But we don't know for certain just yet."

The Major nodded. "I see. I'm just so glad no one was hurt." There was a slight pause in conversation before he continued. "Well, I feel fine now, doc," Lorne said earnestly. "Can I go soon?"

Kate pursed her lips. "I'm going to have to ask you to wait here a little longer until we sort everything out."

Lorne's lips twitched in the semblance of a smile. "Okay, doc."

"Thank you for understanding. We'll have everything straightened out in no time. Just relax, Major Lorne." She stood up, her chair scraping along the floor. Kate circled the table and made for the door. Knocking on it twice, the entrance swished open. "We'll get to the bottom of this, don't worry," she said before finally exiting.

Then Lorne was alone. His thoughts and fears were his only company.

~o~o~

A/N: This chapter focused on my little twist on the events in Doppleganger. In fact, the next couple chapters fit primarily into this episode arc. And, as you probably noticed, some of the dialogue is directly transcribed from the episode. (I do not intend for this to fall under plagiarism, but rather a loyalty to the established canon.)

I do plan for my version of the story arc to be a more in depth account of the happenings in Atlantis during the episode. Also, I hope to deepen the relationship between Lorne and John in the upcoming chapters. Eventually leading to a big reveal!

Anyway, thanks for sticking with me and this story. I'll try to post another chapter as soon possible. Please review!