Prentiss
I sat beside my father at the funeral. I held his hand for comfort; he had been crying since the start, but they were silent tears so he wasn't disrupting anything. She loved Italy, so this is where we were. My father had said that she always asked that if she died first, could he bury her here in Venice. The weather was nice, the sky was clear. There was a cool breeze that blew often.
My team stood across from me and kept a distance away. They were all in suits, JJ and Garcia in nice dresses. Will, Jack and Henry were here too. All but Garcia and the two boys were wearing sunglasses, making them all look very professional.
The funeral felt like it went for hours and when it finally finished and everyone had given us their condolences, we could relax a bit. I made my father walk to the team with me; I didn't want him to think I'd be ditching him for them. JJ stepped forwards on our way to them and she hugged me when we met. "I'm so sorry, Em." She whispered as we parted.
I smiled gratefully and nodded. "Uh…dad, this is my team, team this is my father, Richard Prentiss."
"We are deeply sorry for your loss, sir." Morgan said quietly, taking his glasses off as the others did.
He nodded and looked at me, "You should go eat something with your friends; you haven't had much in the last few days. I'm going to go back to the hotel."
"Dad—"
"I'm not in the mood to argue with you, Emily," He said sternly, "I'll be fine on my own; you won't." He had tears in his eyes and I felt my own tears in mine. They had built up during the funeral and they were threatening to fall now that my father was evidently trying to keep his distance from me. He turned to walk away but stopped and turned back after a few steps, "Oh, and Emily? I think you should really reconsider your occupational choice. Your work is extremely stressful, and god knows that's what killed your mother."
I went to speak but I stopped myself and watched him walk away. I looked at my team, "He's just upset. He's normally not like that; he's usually a lot more offensive and careless."
"You must have had one rough childhood…" Reid said quietly, "Should we be offended of that stressful work comment?"
"Well he's not wrong." Garcia said quietly.
"How are you doing?" Rossi asked me.
"Well, I've been better, I've been worse," I shrugged my shoulders, "We didn't exactly have the best relationship and I didn't like her much, but she was my birth giver, so…" I glanced at Hotch. His eyes were concerned, but nothing affectionate showed. I was hoping maybe he'd give up on the secret and just be here for me, but apparently not.
I sighed and looked back to where my father was, getting into his car. He drove away a few seconds after he closed the door, "Well, that's another family relationship going to hell."
"What?" Morgan gave me a confused look.
"I'm going to bet that he'll move away somewhere and I'll only ever hear from him at Christmas and maybe my birthday."
"Oh, that's next month." JJ frowned.
"Emily, I trust we'll see you at Christmas?" My aunty asked from behind me. She was one of those rich, snobby people that no one liked.
I looked at her at my side. "Sure," I nodded. She nodded before walking away. I rolled my eyes and shook my head before sighing and looking back to my team, "You guys really didn't need to come today."
"Yes we did." Hotch said quietly.
"It's really no problem for us bein' here." Will assured.
"Your father said you haven't eaten much lately; would you like to go to a restaurant?" Rossi asked. I looked behind me as my mother's fresh grave as I thought about it. I didn't feel hungry, but I really hadn't eaten much in the past three days. I probably was hungry but I was just too upset or lost to realise it at the moment.
"Yeah, you do," JJ said quietly as she stepped forwards, "Come on." She put her arm around me and gently pushed me to walk. I forced myself to look away from her grave and I walked where JJ led me.
The team tried their hardest to make me smile and laugh, although it wasn't much use. I never expected myself to be so shaken. I never saw my mother when she was alive, but now I was faced with the fact that she wasn't available if I decided that I wanted to contact her.
I heard a knock on the door to my hotel room. I put the glass of straight vodka down and walked to the door. Hotch smiled to me when I opened it.
"Hey," I said quietly as I stepped to the side and motioned for him to come in. I closed and locked the door behind him, "Where's Jack?"
"He's with Garcia." He said as he looked at the alcohol. He raised his eyebrows as he held it up to me before walking to the sink and pouring it down, "Emily—"
"It was my first glass," I shook my head, "I'm not drinking my pain away"
He gave me an unsure look.
"I promise." I said as I approached him. I placed a chastised kiss on him lips and then rinsed the glass out. I put it back with the others and turned to look at him, "So, how was your day?"
"Emily." He gave me an obvious look.
I sighed and looked down. He took my hand gently and pulled me to the dining table. He pulled a seat out and motioned for me to sit. He sat across from me and waited silently until I looked up and met his eyes.
"Come on, talk." He sat back and kept his eyes on me.
"About what?"
"Please don't make me ask a million questions. Talk to me, Em."
I took a breath and brushed my hair out of my face, "It's just weird. I hardly ever saw her before, but I knew that if I needed or wanted to contact her then I could. Now, all I'm thinking is that I'm never going to speak to her again. I'm never going to see her or hear her voice," I shook my head and tears filled my eyes, "Just a few months ago, I was thinking to myself that I wanted to…to fix what was wrong, to talk to her regularly and get to know her."
He sat forwards and leant on his arms on the table, listening silently.
"She detested me when she died. Her only child and I couldn't have been more of a disappointment," I shook my head as tears dripped onto my cheeks; "I could never imagine what it would feel like to have a daughter like me. Everything I put her through, everything I said…no wonder her sickness was originally stress induced."
"Emily, this was not your fault." He shook his head.
"Yeah, I'm still trying to believe that," I looked at him for a few seconds of silence as his eyes moved over my face, "Please don't profile me," I closed my eyes and shook my head.
"You look tired; maybe you should get some sleep." He said quietly. I looked down at my hands on the table. "Jack's with Garcia all night. I can stay with you if you want."
I smiled at him before looking down again and nodding, "Thanks."
"Come on," He stood up and held his hand out to me. I took it and stood, relishing the feeling as he placed a few kisses on my lips, "Go get changed."
I nodded and grabbed my bag. I took it into the bathroom and closed the door. I opened it again and looked out, "Hey…don't go anyway, okay?"
"I'll be out here when you're done." He assured with a nod.
I smiled and closed the door again. I had a shower and let myself cry for a short while, my tears mixing and hiding with the shower water. I got out and brushed my hair out before changing into a loose shirt and cotton shorts. I took a breath as I stared at myself in the mirror. I zipped my toiletries bag up, put it in my clothes bag, zipped that up and took it back into the room, dropping it where it was previously.
The light was out and the TV was on; Hotch was lying on the bed. He looked at me and motioned for me to come over. I grabbed my phone from the dining table, plugged it into the charger and then walked to the bed. I sat down and crossed my legs over. Hotch muted the TV and sat up.
"…I told her about you."
"Your mother?"
I nodded, "The day after I got to Spain, two days before she died. I told her all about you. Not the professional Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner, but you."
"Why?" He asked curiously, "I don't mind, but I'm sure you would have more important things to discuss."
"She asked if I was seeing anyone, I told her everything that came to mind, and she asked me a few questions to help me figure out what I was…I don't know…feeling."
"And what is that?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Oh, uh-uh," I shook my head, "You don't get to know that."
"Why not?"
"Because we've be on one date."
"Is this you trying to hint to me that you're waiting for me to ask you again?"
"Well, I wasn't intending on hinting it, but in a few weeks, feel free to ask me out again."
He nodded, "I'll make a note of it. Now lay down and get some sleep." He lay down and pulled my down with him. I lay against him, my head on his shoulder and my hand on his chest. He kissed my hair and turned the TV off; he knew it was harder for me to sleep when there was light.
"Dad, come on."
"I'm staying here for a while longer, Emily. Go back to Virginia, go back to work and think about how your life would be without it. Don't worry about me; I'll be back in America within a few more weeks."
I shook my head, "I don't want to leave you here by yourself." My team was in the room too, sitting silently and watching us.
"Go home." He said more forcefully.
Tears filled my eyes, "Please stop making this more complicated than it needs to be."
"You're making it complicated. You're overthinking it, Emily. You know how much you overthink," He looked past me, "Agent Hotchner, please take care of her."
My eyes widened slightly. I'd hoped the team wouldn't think anything of that. "I can assure you that we will." He nodded to my father. I think that his use of "we" instead of "I" made it sound a lot less suspicious.
"I'll see you in a few weeks, maybe months; I'm not sure yet." He kissed my cheek and walked out of my hotel room. Once he was gone, I looked down to the floor and brushed my hair back with my fingers.
"Now I see where you get your stubbornness from…" Reid said quietly.
I shook my head and sat down with them.
"He'll be okay." JJ said quietly, smiling at me comfortingly.
"I know he will," I nodded, "It's me I'm not so sure about…" I added quietly.
"Well you've got us and your booty call boyfriend." Morgan smirked.
"I swear to god…" I closed my eyes and shook my head. Will, JJ, Reid, Garcia and Morgan all laughed at me. Rossi and Hotch glanced at each other.
"…Can we meet him sometime?" Garcia asked.
"No." I shook my head.
"Why not?" JJ raised her eyebrows.
"Because I like him…" I tilted my head with a smirk. Rossi started to laugh to himself and failed to calm himself down. I glared at him, "Shut up."
"He's like 60." He laughed.
"No he's not! He's 46!"
"Hotch's age?" Reid looked at me.
"Yeah." I nodded.
"Imagine that, Emily and Hotch dating." Garcia smirked.
"Oh, I really don't want to picture that." JJ shook her head with a disgusted face.
Hotch, Rossi and I laughed with the rest of them to keep up the show, but it hurt internally. Was she disgusted by that? What would her reaction be when she finally found out? It would happen sometime and we both knew it, but that comment made me feel like we should keep it quiet until it was impossible to.
Conversation picked up between them and Hotch looked at me, "Are you ready to go back to Virginia or do you want a few more days to try and convince your father?"
I shook my head, "No, we should get back to work."
"Well you won't be working for a few weeks." He shook his head.
"What? You can't kick me off the team." My voice was higher than a whisper and the table fell silent again.
"I'm not kicking you off; I'm giving you a few weeks to grieve."
"I don't want to grieve." I shook my head.
"Prentiss—"
"No, Hotch. I will be back in that bullpen on Monday morning, no later than seven."
He sighed, "We'll talk about it later."
