I am glad that all of my readers are enjoying the story. I really am trying to wind it down so that I can start another fic that has been on my mind recently. I want to start it but I want to finish this.
I hope that everyone is enjoying the story and I want to thank all of my readers especially BeeForever, Kimmie98, angel897 for staying with me through the series; and Razorfang and tfandanimefan for reviewing. I appreciate all of the reviews. I hope that all of you continue. Please enjoy!
"Oh Allie, they are so adorable." Stargazer said as she watched the two infant sparklings sleeping curled together in their berth. She was holding Hornet on her hip as she gazed at the split parked twins while Hornet was trying to click and coo then looking at his mother wondering why the twins would not wake up. Stargazer nuzzled her son laughing quietly at Hornet's curiosity and inquisitiveness.
"They are so good natured and both have settled in well with Roddy and Orion." Allie told her as she watched the black and yellow mechling in his carrier's arms. "How are you doing?"
"I have good days and bad days. The hardest part is the therapy that I have to do and I still tire easily. Doc keeps pacing my progress and I have to do counseling because Doc is concerned that I will become depressed since I can't go back to work yet. I hate that I can't drive or navigate the transport or that I have to depend so much on Bumblebee and I don't like the fact that I have no strength but I will never regret carrying Hornet." Stargazer told her solemnly. Allie felt her sadness and she knew the real reason that Doc was insisting that Stargazer do counseling. Doc and Bumblebee both were concerned that Star was not accepting the fact that she would never be able to carry again and they feared that she would try to get sparked thus putting her life in danger. Allie knew that Star had always wanted a large family and this was only minor setback for the couple. They were both young and had options and they had Hornet which was truly a miracle from Primus.
Bumblebee was treating her with gentleness while also monitoring their bond to make sure that she was doing as well as she was telling everyone. He was very concerned about her because Stargazer's lively and bubbly personality still had not returned since her illness. He would always stand by her but Bumblebee feared that the sickness had dulled her senses and lose the vivaciousness that made her so engaging. Allie had tried to reason with him, to let her come to him and talk, but Bumblebee still would not listen to her.
Optimus reminded her to be patient with the couple since they had gone through so much and just give them time.
"Will Doc make you continue the therapy or is it just temporary?" Allie asked her.
"It will be extensive because I have lost so much of my strength and she says that it will take time to regain my strength." Stargazer said. "Allie they are truly beautiful. Elita is exquisite. Her coloring is just extraordinary. I have never seen a femme with such vibrant colors and the hint of blue on her peds is just darling."
"I know. Optimus absolutely worships her. He already has her spoiled. I can't get her to recharge unless he is home and rocking her in his arms." Allie stated. "It is so rare for her to be this peaceful and that only happened because Optronix was tired and fussy and would not settle without her in his arms."
"They truly complement each other. His royal blue offsets her pink and their white trim matches each other." Stargazer said. She had never seen twins so in tuned with each other like them. Not even Sunstreaker and Sideswipe complemented each other like the two little twins resting so contentedly with their little arms around the other.
"Well Optimus is very happy with all four of his sparklings. He gets on the floor every night and plays with them after work." Allie smiled softly as she looked at the sparklings that had been so difficult to bring into the world. They were beautiful and not just because they were hers. "I am blessed but I told Optimus that I want to wait a while before we have any more. I am not recovering as quickly like I did from Roddy and Orion's sparking and having four now is a lot more challenging."
"I know. I was in Cassie's home with all nine of hers and I thought I would lose my mind. It was a mad house and that was before Soundwave came home. Cassie just lets them play while she cooked and set the table with energon before her mate came home." Stargazer laughed quietly. "I wanted a large family but I think I am glad that Primus had a hand in this."
"Are you sure you are okay with your limitations?" Allie asked her.
"No but I am learning to accept it." Star replied sadly. "I wanted at least one more but it is not meant to be."
"We still love you and Bumblebee adores you." Allie watched as Elita squirmed in her recharge.
"I know but I feel smothered." Star stated.
"That's normal. He almost lost you and he is afraid." Allie told her.
"But I didn't die and he needs to let me live my life without breathing down my neck all the time." Star told her as frustration clearly colored her words and features.
"He will calm down. It is only natural that his sire protocols as kicking in and he wants to make sure that you and Hornet are safe. I went through it with Optimus and I am going through it again since we have the twins now as well as Hot Rod and Orion." Allie took her hand. "I'm sure he will settle down once he sees that you are stronger and more able to get around better."
"I hope so. I am ready for things to be normal again." Stargazer said as she sighed.
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"Sunstreaker, why aren't you on duty?" Raynie asked. She had just gotten Sunshine down for recharge and was looking forward to some quiet time without any distractions.
"I switched with Hound so I could spend some time with you." Sunstreaker sat down heavily on the couch as he cycled air through his vents. He dimmed his optics and Raynie picked up that something wasn't right. Although she loved him dearly she struggled with her mate's insecurities at time and this looked like one of them.
"Sunstreaker, what's wrong?" She asked though she couldn't hide the tiredness from her voice. He sat there as she slowly approached and then sat next to him curling her legs under her and wrapping her arms around her mate. Sunstreaker didn't return the gesture immediately but tried to pull away. "Sunstreaker, don't do this." Raynie said quietly but firmly as she felt the darkness swirling around her mate.
"I don't deserve you." He whispered. His face clouded with shame and guilt and Raynie wondered why he would say something so stupid.
"Of course you do, you deserve to be happy." She countered as she hugged his chassis close to hers. Raynie wondered again why Sunstreaker was acting this way.
"Are you happy?" She heard softly and realized that Sunstreaker was asking her this question.
"Yes I am. I love you and Sideswipe and I adore Sunshine." She replied. She squeezed him to reaffirm her words and Sunstreaker shuddered.
"I know how much you have given up. You don't patrol anymore and you only train now three days a week." Sunstreaker told her his plates scrunching up in a frown of concern for her.
"I have everything I could ever want or need my love. Why are you acting this way?" Raynie wanted to know why he was so depressed and moody about her.
"I guess that I am afraid." He said as he curled around her and muffled it into her hair. "It seems as if we are living a dream and any minute it will end."
"Sunstreaker, you can't think like that. We have each other, Sideswipe, and Sunshine. You can't let doubt and insecurity cloud your happiness." Raynie held him tight as she sent comforting soothing feelings through their bond. In the distance she could feel Sideswipe concern and worry but she sent love and security back to him so that he wouldn't cut his patrol early and rush home.
"I love you so much Sunstreaker. Don't ever forget that. I will never turn my back on you." She whispered and Sunstreaker shuddered then lifted his helm to capture her mouth in a brutal kiss. Raynie gasped but she wasn't surprised by his attack. She was used to this side of him and as she shifted so that he could have complete control over her she gloried in his passion.
"Raynie…" He cried softly as he touched her everywhere. He couldn't get enough of her as he ripped her shirt from her and devoured her breasts nipping and biting as Raynie cried out and arched against him. She tried to hold him but he was feral in his pursuit. He grabbed her hair forcing her head back and Raynie gasped as Sunstreaker bit her hard as she felt his spike slide into her valve at the same time. She was ready for him, she always was ready for her mate, and he pumped harshly into her as she arched to meet each forceful thrust.
It was over as quickly as it began with both panting harshly against the other. Raynie's ears were ringing from the assault, her valve stretched and sore, as she lay under her mate waiting for him to gather his strength.
"Well once again I miss the main event!" Raynie looked up. She hadn't noticed when Sideswipe had walked in but she watched warily as he walked around the panting couple and knelt down before bestowing an open mouth kiss on her swollen and bleeding lips. "Brother you have got to be more careful." He said it softly though Raynie could see the lust and love that glowed deeply, piercingly from his optics. Sunstreaker rolled her over where she was resting on his chassis and Sideswipe came down on his knees behind her as he wrapped his arms around her and cupped her breasts. Raynie gasped as she felt him roll her nipples between his fingers pinching and squeezing until Raynie cried out from the pleasure pain induced sensation that Sideswipe was causing.
"Sides…" She tried to say.
"No, you let Sunny and now you will let me." He panted harshly into her ear as Sides nipped at the red mark that Sunstreaker left on her neck. Raynie cried out as she was pulled from Sunstreaker and Sideswipe arranged her where she was straddling his lap. He kissed her, his glossa demanding entrance and Raynie couldn't stop him as she opened herself, body and spark, to her other bond mate. Raynie felt Sideswipe probe her valve as he checked to see that she was ready for him and then he lifted her by the waist and Raynie cried out brokenly as she felt his spike stretch her already too sore valve.
"Sideswipe, please…" Raynie cried out as she felt him slowly slide her up and down on his spike as he held firmly to her waist. Raynie was experiencing extreme pleasure as Sideswipe taught her to ride him as he leaned back taking her with him. Sunstreaker slowly rose up as he watched hungrily his brother pleasured their mate. He crawled closer as he palmed her aft and then squeezed his brother's spike between their thrusting. Sideswipe squeaked out a strangled yelp as Sunstreaker continued to explore their bodies until he found Raynie's port.
"Sunstreaker no, please." She pleaded desperately but Sunstreaker would not listen as he inserted two fingers and crooked them so that he could feel his brother's spike through the thin membrane of her valve and port as she was impaled on it.
"Sun…streaker, please." Raynie wailed as he began to stretch her port and then line himself up against them. He stopped Sideswipe's movement for a moment and then Raynie felt both of them at the same time and bit down hard to keep from screaming. This would not be the time to wake Sunshine and Raynie could not stop her mates if she tried. Raynie quivered as Sideswipe slowly began to move her again. Both mechs moaned low growling as she felt so good and tight against them, her valve stretching and then clenching as Raynie tried to hold on to the charge that was attempting to over whelm her.
"Raynie…" Sunstreaker growled into her ear as he quickened his thrusting forcing her to impale Sideswipe's spike as he gasped and groaned under her. She could her the clicking of Sideswipe's chest plates and see the swirling shite gold light of his spark as Raynie's flowed and pulsed in response. Sunstreaker pushed her down against his brother and Raynie could not hold back the scream as their sparks touched and merged into one. Sunstreaker could hear his daughter in the distance but she wasn't screaming or crying yet so Sunstreaker held his mate against his brother until both their overloads consumed them.
"Wicked isn't it." Sunstreaker murmured against her ear as she barely registered his words. She didn't even have the energy to move much less check on her daughter as she listened to Sunshine's cries from the nursery.
"Sunstreaker…Sunshine, she needs us." Raynie whispered. She was too exhausted to move but she could feel that Sunstreaker could tend to her so she tried to push him toward the nursery. He slowly stood up as he looked back down at them with regret but then turned and walked toward the wailing sparkling. Raynie watched him leave and soon she heard Sunshine's wail turn into happy little clicks as her sire picked her up from her berth.
"You worry too much." Raynie looked down at Sideswipe.
"You don't worry enough." She retaliated and smiled at him.
"He will be fine. He is just brooding." Sideswipe said softly to help ease her concern.
"I know but I still don't like it when he is like that." She said and then nuzzled Sideswipe's shoulder with her nose.
"Holding Sunshine will help ease his depression. He loves her." Sideswipe said as he kissed the side of Raynie's jaw.
"Good. He shouldn't feel like that."
"He does because we lost everything when the war broke out." Sideswipe said solemnly. He turned her head and kissed her sore swollen lips. "I could get lost in your eyes." He said. "I could lose myself in your body." Raynie shivered at his words despite feeling like every limb in her body was boneless. She could feel his passion growing again and she wondered if she would remain on line through the night.
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"Mommy!" Roddy yelled as he ran inside of their quarters. Allie sighed as she heard Elita and Optronix start crying. She just managed to get them down for recharge after a fitful afternoon with both of them. Allie missed carrying them because when they were inside of her she could feel their emotions and it felt that she was a part of their bond as both a mother and a telepath. Now she could feel their emotions through the creator/creation bond but she felt she lost a part of that distinctive feeling that she had with them while carrying. She was trying to fight the depression that tried to overcome her and she felt that she was succeeding but when she had days like today, especially with Elita, it drained her emotions and left her listless and tired.
"I will see to them." Optimus said as he walked in with Orion. They loved Roddy dearly but he just didn't understand that new sparklings needed their rest. He could sense Allie's mood and he was trying everything that he could to help but Allie was not always open with him since the twins sparking and Roddy and Orion were exactly helping since they didn't understand. He walked in and picked up Elita first since she was screaming to get out of her berth crib. He picked her up as she continued to scream. "Now, now, you don't need to act like this little one." Optimus said softly. "Give your mother some peace." He cooed and clicked at her until she calmed down to whimpers and then Optimus picked up Optronix and cradled them together so that he could see for himself that his sister was okay. Optimus smiled at his sparklings and Optronix smiled back but Elita still whimpered.
"Allie, has she been like this all day?" Optimus asked softly as he heard Allie walk in with Roddy and Orion.
"Yes, I think she is cutting some dentas. Doc noticed that she did not have them all in when she was sparked but Doc said that was not uncommon in sparklings." Allie walked up next to her mate and looked at the two rambunctious sparklings in his arms. "I have given her some pain medicine that Doc told me to rub on her dermas and along the inside of her mouth plates but she is just not happy."
"What does Doc suggest?" Optimus asked.
"She says to try it and then bring her in tomorrow if she is not doing better." Allie said as she tried to soothe her little femme but Elita just turned away from her wanting her sire and brother. It bothered Allie but she didn't say anything. She didn't have to since Optimus could feel her distress. He softly cooed and clicked until both the twins optics were flashing on and off, a sign that they were having trouble staying on line, and Allie had to smile at her little ones has they went down for their sire. He slowly laid them together in their berth crib and quietly ushered Allie and the younglings out as he closed their door.
"Allie, you might want to talk to Doc tomorrow about both Elita and you." Optimus said carefully. He didn't want to upset her but he felt that she needed to vent her frustrations to someone who could help her in a more clinical way.
"I know but I can't help the way I feel." Allie said. She sat down heavily in a chair at the table while Optimus joined her. They could hear Orion and Roddy talking and playing in their room and Allie had to smile as she listened to her precious sons. "I love them so much Optimus but I don't understand why I feel so moody and depressed. I have two new sparklings and I act as if they have died."
"I know and Ratchet informed to watch you after you brought them in for a checkup last week. I think he noticed you lack of energy and enthusiasm and I think he made his own conclusions." Optimus reached across the table and gently took her hand. "You have also been cleared for interfacing and yet you have not touched me at all. You won't even cuddle with me. I haven't pushed but it is so unlike you."
"I was hoping that you wouldn't notice. I don't' have the energy and it feels like I am waiting for something to go wrong with them." Allie looked directly in her mate's optics. "I wonder if I am hoping something would go wrong."
"It's normal for this to happen. Humans call it post-partum depression." Optimus told her quietly listening for his sons should they make a surprise appearance. He didn't want them to say anything since younglings tend to take things so literally. "You need to talk to Ratchet or Doc and see if they can help you."
"I think I will." Allie said after she listened to Optimus. "I don't like this at all."
"I know and it is not you either." Optimus added. "I will never push you when you are not feeling well but I will always be there for you."
"Thank you."
