AN:
At Tunderkiwi: I can't write story which revolve around magic. I'll end up making Merlin so powerful that I can only make it exciting by (a) writing stupid mistakes (which breaks my portrayal of an intelligent Merlin), (b) introducing other BAMF characters which are probably OC's (i'm not a fan of that) or (c) writing smut.
At Tom: If you liked their confrontation, image what Morgana will say to him.
At Dark Lelouch3221: I might do that later but this chapter just had to be written first.
At suant123: "outgrown" is just the tip of the country sized iceberg which we will run into about 4 chapters from now.
Prepare yourselves, this story is now rated M.
I promised you romance so enough of my rant and enjoy!
Healing
Noise pulled the warlock from his dreamless sleep. The smooth fabric that covered his body reminded him of the place he was in as he got his bearings.
"Enter." He yawned.
Merlin was surprised to see a young woman, vaguely familiar, enter his chambers and proceeded to lay some sort of clothing on the bedside table. He had been expecting Morgana but this was not her.
"I'm sorry to intrude, milord. My name is Sefa, I am Queen Morgana's new handmaiden. The Queen has requested your presence urgently."
"What's this?" He asked while the Sefa opened the curtains.
"The Queen said you were tasked with purchasing an outfit for your new position but failed to find the time to do so. She also said you may want to acquire a manservant."
He was slightly annoyed with Morgana buying him clothes as it left the door open to other things. There was one door he was going to close immediately.
"Sefa, are you permitted to hire new staff?" Asked Merlin.
"Yes, milord. I am." She replied with a hint of excitement.
"Then you're also permitted to fire them. Don't let Morgana hire a manservant for me." Replied Merlin.
"Ehm..." Sefa hesitated for a moment. "She won't be pleased."
"I've been a manservant for years and I don't need a stranger for what I can do myself."
"Y.. You were... Apologies milord. It's not my place to make inquiries about your past."
"I've been Arthur's manservant for years. Stop calling me 'milord' and just call me Merlin."
"Alright, Merlin."
"That's better. Tell her I'll be there shortly." He replied.
With Sefa out of the room, Merlin examined Morgana's gift more carefully. The package consisted of three items. The first was a red, padded jacket, the second was new pair of dark trousers, and the third was a blue neckerchief which was made of silk.
Merlin let the neckerchief pass through his fingers. Although he had been the King's manservant, silk rarely passed through his fingers. As he dressed himself, Merlin noticed that the neckerchief actually got obscured from sight. It made him wonder why Morgana had bought it for him. The only difference, besides the fabric, was that the silk one tickled his neck a bit. The warlock decided not to wear it because he didn't want it to get dirty over the next few 'bloody' hours.
The throne in the throne room had made place for the large amount of tables that now occupied it. On some of them lay soldiers from Arthur's army. They were alive but far from healthy. On the remaining tables lay the citizens who were harmed during the people's inner conflict when they closed the gate.
This was the plan Merlin had proposed the day before, to heal all the wounded. It seemed like an insane idea to heal the men that fought against them but they had families in Camelot for whom they fought, and Merlin convinced them that this was an opportunity for Morgana to gain their loyalty.
When Merlin entered, Morgana was waiting for him.
"You're looking very sharp today, Merlin. It almost made me forget that you're late." She teased.
"It's heavier than what I usually wear."
"You don't like it?"
He could hear the insecurity in her voice but he didn't mean to criticize her choice.
"I do, it just takes some getting used to." He hastily replied.
She gave him a resigned smile and he felt like he could do nothing right.
Over the next hour, Merlin and Morgana were busy healing the wounded. Merlin called on Morgana's superior healing skills from time to time and she had him prescribe medicine for the barely injured.
Everything was going smoothly until Merlin looked upon a familiar face.
"Percival." The warlock almost gasped.
The burly knight had must have been headstrong because not only had cuts on arms and legs, but an ill treated and infected stab wound on his side as well.
"Morgana, could you help me with this one?"
"Coming..." She almost changed her mind when she saw the man she was supposed to treat, "Could we restrain him?"
Merlin's features hardened as he looked at the knight. "It's fine. He won't try anything."
She couldn't see that he was almost threatening Percival and she put her trust in him. Morgana spoke the words and his wounds began to heal. It was only after she was done that she noticed Merlin had stayed beside her the whole time.
"Thank you." Said Merlin.
Morgana knew something just happened but she wasn't sure what. She merely nodded at him and went to treat another patient.
Merlin turned towards Percival and whispered, "You can search for Arthur, you can find Gwaine in Nemeth, or you can serve Camelot."
The warlock did not wait for a reply and proceeded to care for the others.
The throne room was cleaned up shortly after and the throne was put back into place. Some of the wounded had not been treated yet but Merlin would tend to them shortly. Morgana took the opportunity of Merlin's absence to concern herself an important issue. She had the guards bring Gaius before her.
"Is it time for my execution?" Asked the old physician.
The thought had occured to Morgana but she eventually decided not to go through with it. Gaius did not pose a threat to her reign but that didn't mean she was going to ignore him altogether. The only thing stopping her from executing him was Merlin, even if the warlock did not know it. Judging by the aftermath of his conversation with Gaius, she could tell that the old physician was still somewhere in his heart. Death was too severe and could possibly awaken emotions inside the warlock that would put him against her. All she really needed was to get Gaius out of sight.
"I don't understand your loyalty to Arthur and Uther. Both of them strive to kill our kind."
"We are not the same kind. I've dedicated my life to saving people's lives rather than ending them."
"You've done worse than that, Gaius."
"My hands were tied, there was nothing I could do to end the purge."
"I'm not talking about the Purge. I'm talking about what you've done to Merlin, Morgause and I."
"I never harmed any of you."
"You hid my magic from me and let me live my life with nightmares and irrational fears. Morgause spent half her life running, not knowing who to trust. Merlin-"
"I ALWAYS had his best interest at heart and it is you that I blame for his condition."
"His condition? You have none to blame but yourself. Who is it that refused to help him when he faced execution? He returns to Camelot and immediately you tell him that his beliefs are wrong while blood still stains his hands. You've been like a father to him in the past but when push comes to shove, you're not on his side, you're on Arthur's."
"That doesn't mean that you haven't been manipulating him. What kind of black magic did you use?"
She laughed at him in an almost giggling fashion.
"None. The only 'manipulation', as you call it, is that I know how to show him my appreciation."
The old physician frowned in confusion and it took Morgana a lot of effort not to grin in his ignorance.
"That's where you failed, Gaius." She explained, "He saves Arthur, gets a pat on the back, and then you tell him to clean the leech tank the next day."
"He didn't want gifts because he was striving for a better future and that would be his reward." Gaius argued, or tried to, and Morgana thought him blind.
She continued explaining, "He has waited for years and you gave him nothing. All he wanted was recognition, public recognition, from you and Arthur but you took him for granted."
Gaius' mind drifted and Morgana revelled in his misery. The doubts that now plagued that man's mind gave her more satisfaction than she had in years.
"Gaius, you are hereby banished from the city of Camelot. You will leave the city before dusk or your life is forfeit."
The old physician expected a more severe punishment but did not wait for an explanation. Morgana sighed as the door closed behind him and she set off for Arthur's chambers.
Morgana dreaded to be in her half-brother's bedroom. Unfortunately she had to look through his belongings to find anything important which she could use against him. Most of the documents that littered his chambers were orders for his soldiers who were no longer at his disposal. Others were letters that had become empty threats.
A small wooden crate was stored under the bed and it contained a stack of letters. The appearance of the letters stood out as they weren't in envelopes. Morgana opened it and read.
Dear Morgana,
For years you have fought for continued existence of sorcerers despite recent attacks on Uther and the city of Camelot.
I'm writing you this letter because I want to thank for taking a stand when others can't in fear of execution.
It takes a special kind of person to fight for others and ask for nothing in return.
Once more, thank you.
The letter wasn't signed by anyone but she could imagine it was from a druid. Then Morgana realised something.
"Who are you to keep this from me!" She felt slight betrayel towards Arthur but it didn't keep her from feeling a bit of joy. Curiosity had her open and read another letter.
Dear Morgana,
It is a terrible thing to be scared of yourself but you don't have to be. You are a wonderful person and having magic won't change that. You are still the kind heart that Uther lacks, you are still the woman that shared what she had during the famine and nothing will change that.
Gaius doesn't want me to tell you this, but I have magic too. If there's anything you need, anything at all, all you need to do is ask.
Love,
Merlin
It occurred to Morgana that Merlin never told her about his magic, nor did he ever assume that she knew of it. Had he sent the letter at all?
Arthur, she noted, didn't know about her magic until she first conquered Camelot. It begged the question, when did he find the letters?
Unravelling parts of a tale that never happened, Morgana opened yet another letter.
Dear Morgana,
When I first met you, I merely thought of you as Uther's beautiful ward. As time passed by, I got to know you better than I should, but I don't regret it. I went to you on a whim and in the hope that you would help me hide the druid boy, and you did. You were selfless and defied Uther when you had every right to give us up.
I never expected you to help me when Ealdor was plagued by bandits. You risked your life for a favour you didn't owe me. Ever since the battle, the sight of you brings a peace to my heart that is beyond compare.
When I see you, I no longer see Uther's frail ward. Instead, I see a strong woman who isn't afraid to speak her mind but always puts others before herself. I want you to know that you're special and that you're in the people's hearts. You may disagree with me on that but you can't tell me it's not true when I say that you'll always be special in mine.
Love,
Merlin
Morgana took a deep breath and told herself not to cry. If she had gotten this letter at the right moment, before he poisoned her, she would have thrown herself at him.
Knights had confessed their feelings for her but they always went on about her beauty. Their compliments were 'nice' but never as rich as Merlin's letter. The sorcerer would rather be a lover than a fighter.
The Queen of Camelot noticed her breathing tremble. Before leaving, she put back the first two letters she opened and kept the third one.
It was evening when Merlin entered Morgana's chambers.
"You summoned me?" He asked.
She nodded "There's something I want to talk to you about."
"You went easy on him, you didn't have to." He replied.
Morgana was confused for a moment but quickly realised he was referring to Gaius.
"You regret my near execution. Who is to say the same won't happen for him?" The truth was that she didn't want to lose him.
He wanted to say something but he couldn't find the words. With some of the anger still inside him, Merlin didn't care what would happen to Gaius. On the other hand, he admired her taking his feelings into account.
"It's not the reason why you're here." Morgana admitted. "What are we, Merlin? How do you see me? Am I a friend, an ally or merely the Queen you serve?"
The warlock was dying to know why she asked but it was a question he wanted answered for himself as well.
"I don't serve you out of a sense of duty. I know you and you're worth more than the titles you've been given. I'd almost call you a friend but I wouldn't wage war on Camelot for just a friend. We've put our lives in each other's hands and defied destiny ever since... "
"Yes, but what does that make me?" Morgana emphasized herself.
"It makes you close to my heart." He finally answered.
She wanted to damn him for being himself, for not giving something tangible like love or friend, but it was part of who he was.
"I want to give you something." Morgana said.
"I don't need a reward, Arthur never-"
"I'm not Arthur, I won't take you for granted."
Out of all her qualities, this was what Merlin liked most; her determination to do the right thing.
She continued, "The things we've been through... I can't see you as a subject. What you've done for me is extraordinary and mustn't go unrewarded. You gave me what I wanted, so name whatever you want and you shall have it."
He wet his lips and his eyes turned soft and sad.
"But we always want what we cannot have." He replied.
It was very Merlin of him to say that and she knew he would never ask for something petty. If this man wanted something impossible, she would do the impossible.
By the time she knew how to react, he was already heading for the door, and she locked it in the blink of an eye.
The warlock turned around and she spoke before he could.
"I refuse to take you for granted." There was a fire in her words, a determination, which would drag the words from him. "You've changed me, Merlin. First I was naïve and then I was bitter. Now I feel like something else entirely. I've learned to trust you again and to share my secrets with you once more. It's so familiar and yet so foreign but I don't want it to pass."
Merlin moved closer to her and took her hands in his. For a moment he just looked at them and then he placed one on his heart. She felt it race against his chest and she knew that he too was somewhere between scared and excited. His other hand let go of hers and moved higher until it rested against her cheek. Morgana noticed that his eyes moved from her eyes to her lips and back. He was leaning forward and it took her by surprise. Morgana tried to close the remaining distance at the very last moment but it made for a very awkward kiss. She moved up while he moved down and it resulted in his lips capturing only her bottom lip. It lasted only a moment and he broke away. She could see his guilt and pain as he averted his eyes. Morgana didn't immediately realise what was going on until he whispered 'sorry'. He mistook her failed attempt to meet him halfway for pulling away.
The hand that rested on his chest, which she could have used to push him away, grabbed his shirt and yanked him towards her while her other hand made its way to his neck. Merlin didn't think about what she was doing and let it happen. When her lips touched his once more, she wanted more than a chaste kiss, she wanted to taste him. Morgana deepened their kiss by bringing her tongue into play. When the warlock reciprocated, all she felt was bliss. A moment passed and they broke away to look at one another with different eyes. Morgana didn't see the boy she fancied, she saw a man she could love.
And yet, it wasn't enough. He could say that he loved her and it wouldn't be enough for her. She wanted more from him.
Morgana kissed him again and slowly pulled him in her direction, further and further, until she fell onto the bed, taking him with her. He almost landed right on top of her but ended up right next to her with. They smiled playfully and when Merlin tried to approach her, she pushed him onto his back and, whilst kissing, straddled him. It wasn't until she pushed back his jacket that he noticed she had unbuttoned it and was trying to undress him. He moved a bit so he could take it off and Morgana was pulling at his shirt already.
Biting her lip she ran her fingers down his bare chest. She smiled as she sat up straight and brought her hair back.
She whispered, "Ongyrde." and the fastenings of her dress were undone.
Merlin was done with waiting and teasing. He flipped her onto her back and she gasped in delight. His defiance had always excited her.
The night, however, would bring more excitement than ever before.
AN:
Since everything is going well in Camelot, the next chapter will show some other things.
