So, after last chapter, a little fill in with this one. Keep hitting review :)
When Arizona started to wake up it was already midday. She tried to grab her phone on her bedside table to check the time but the body lying half on top of hers blocked her from doing that. She felt so content. Looking down at Callie, she saw her sleeping peacefully, a soft smirk on her face. She knew those last few days had been hell for the brunette too, but that, what they just shared, made up for all the hurt. Or almost all. She could still hear the brunette accusing her of only wanting her body but she knew she didn't mean that. She was just scared, and apparently a scared Calliope Torres reacts saying hurtful things she doesn't mean and pushing away the cause of her fears. Good to know. That was exactly what Arizona tended to do.
It's going to be difficult to be in a relationship with her if we both react in the same way, nobody is going to be the first to cave in, and the first little fight we are going to have it's going to be fatal.
Whoa Robbins, slow down, relationship?
But really, we are two pig headed idiots, both so proud.
One fight and we are going to be over because no one will be the first to apologize.
Who was the first to cave in this time? Me maybe? Or her because she came here now?
Definitely me, she was just forced to come here to pick up the pieces, after those things she said.
I was the first to admit my feelings.
No, we are not going to survive our first fight, I know it.
But then images of before that morning, of Callie's body writhing underneath her flashed into her mind and the pure love and affection they shared, was just too much to be put aside.
I'm not giving up now. No way.
"You're thinking way too loud…", Callie said, mocking Arizona and startling her from her thoughts.
"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you…", Arizona apologized.
Callie chuckled and Arizona felt the head lying on her chest moving and turning around to come to face her.
"Hey…", Callie said, "I know you have a lot swirling in that beautiful head of yours, and I promise I'm going to explain everything, just… Can we just lie her a little longer? I love the feeling of your heartbeat under my head", she asked, moving her head back to rest on Arizona's chest.
"Yeah, sure…", Arizona answered, now feeling a little bit self-conscious. They looked like a couple who had known themselves forever but at the same time they didn't know each other at all. They just shared everything but they didn't know the most basic things about each other.
"You rested?", Arizona chanced. The silence wasn't uncomfortable, but she still didn't feel completely at ease. They were on her bed, but they were naked, Callie's head on her chest listening to her heartbeat and she didn't know where to focus her gaze. The previous night they were in such a bad place, and now there they were, after the most amazing love making they ever had.
"Yeah, kind of… Haven't been sleeping in a while…", Callie answered.
"I know, me either… You hungry?"
"No, I'm good…"
"You sure? I think I could use something to eat…"
"Yeah, don't worry, I'm where I want to be, I can't think of anything I wanted more right now".
"So you definitely are a sweet talker, Calliope. Wouldn't have seen that coming… I'll keep it in mind". They both started giggling, and the tension wasn't there anymore, it was like on their first dates, except now they were cuddling in bed, naked.
"You know…", Callie chanced, and seeing that Arizona wasn't stopping her, she decided, that that was the perfect moment to blurt out everything that was on her mind, now that she had the perfect excuse to not look into those blue eyes and see the hurt she caused her and Arizona wasn't likely to kick her out.
"I'm going to say this just once, I'm not good at talking, and when it comes to feelings, I'm a total disaster, I think you got that… Anyway, I'm sorry again for what I said, words are not enough to express how sorry I am… I was and I still am so scared, because I've never been in love before and what I feel for you, is already so, so deep, it scares the crap out of me. And when I'm scared I try to react my own way, which means screwing up everything… But then again, this is no news to you…", she started giggling, feeling kind of pathetic but at ease to talk.
"I've never had a relationship, I don't know a lot about dating, commitment, long distance relationships, introductions to families, stuff like that. And I'm quite the know-it-all kind of girl, when I don't know how to do something I just panic. I already knew I wanted to be with you and what you said yesterday made me so happy but at the same time so scared, so I reacted that way. So, when you left, my mother found me and was worried about that mess I was, so we talked… I told her everything about you… And she talked some sense into me, I mean, I already knew all the things she said but I needed somebody to say them out loud to convince me… So she said I should go for you, and so I did. And I'm so glad I did… Whatever this is and is going to be, I'll never regret anything, even though it would end now, we had this morning and it's enough for me to never regret it".
There was a long moment of silence, Arizona letting Callie's words sink in, while drawing lazy patterns with her thumb on the brunette's shoulder. Then she spoke, almost whispering, worried to pop the pretty pink bubble they were in.
"Why would it end now?", she asked.
"I was just saying… I don't know, Arizona, we never really spoke about any of that, because I was too stubborn to text you or to talk to you when you wanted to do it… Like, for example, what are you doing after your graduation? Are you going back to Colorado? What happens when you'll leave? It's so far away from here I don't think I can survive long distance. Then, what are we doing with our friends and families, it's not that we can just go and say 'Hey, I'm in love with a girl'… I mean, there's so much to figure out, Arizona… I'm so lost", she stopped her rambling putting her hands on her face. She just blurted out everything she had on her mind. She could just hope the blonde wouldn't take it the wrong way.
"Calm down, Calliope, I'm not going anywhere, I'll take the tests to enter the courses for the Master's degree. I'm not leaving Seattle, there is not much for me to do back in Colorado…"
"Yes, but your family is there, your home is there…"
"You are right, but I'm going to live my life, I don't know where I'm going right now, I don't know much, but I sure as hell am not going back to Colorado… Well, actually, this summer I have to…"
"See? This is exactly what I'm talking about…", Callie said, defeated, "you have a life full of plans and things to do, and I'm not so sure I can fit in it".
"Of course you can, Calliope, you'll have an important place into my life, if you want to… And as for our families and friends, let's not worry now, I'm sure everybody will understand eventually…", Arizona said, softly.
"So tell me about this summer…", Callie demanded.
"Well, I'm going to work where I worked last year, it's a month and a half and you can always come visit…"
"Yeah, whatever…"
"Don't… Please… Why can't we just live in this moment and leave the worries for when it's time? I'll be here for almost two months more, let's not worry too much about the future, please… I'm scared too Callie, but now that we both poured our hearts out, there is no much left to do…"
"You are right, I'm sorry…"
Callie moved her body for the first time since she woke up and dragged herself towards the head of the bed. She looked into Arizona's deep blue eyes and then she caressed her face. They closed their eyes and leant in in the sensation. It felt so right, no matter what. They kissed softly and then the kiss became more demanding, tongues dancing, teeth biting lips and hands starting caressing the other's body, their legs intertwined and their centers softly grinding against the other girl's thigh.
"Callie, as much as I love where this is heading, and as much as I loved what happened before, I think we should take things slowly… Like you said, there is a lot to figure out, and the fact that we both agreed to give whatever this is going on between us a shot, is already a very important step. Now we have to get to know each other better, I mean, maybe once I get to know you I figure out that I don't like you at all…", she teased to ease the tension.
They started giggling and then it turned into a full belly laugh.
"Yeah, you're right. How about that food you offered a couple of minutes ago?", Callie asked.
"Breakfast or lunch?"
"How about breakfast?"
"It's my favorite meal!"
"Get out! Mine too!"
"So help me with the pancakes, miss!"
"I thought you were the one who loved baking…"
"I am… But now you're here so you might as well make yourself useful and help me with the batter".
"Yes, boss, come on…"
Laughing, they picked up their scattered clothes from the floor and started getting dressed, completely at ease around each other. They headed for the kitchen.
Not long after their very late breakfast, Callie had to leave and go back home because she had to go to an interview at her modeling agency. It was not a proper agency, but they chose the girls for each particular event, and Callie was one of the their most liked girls. The interview was later that night but her body was spent from the long weeks of lack of sleep and her face was still red, she felt sticky and sweaty and she smelt like sex. Not that she minded, it felt kind of good, but she had to get ready for the interview.
Arizona was pacing in her small bedroom, she couldn't focus on her books and there was no way she could think about anything but Callie. She was mesmerized by that morning. So she decided to ask Mark to meet up. Apparently Callie already told her mother about her feelings for her, so now she was likely to tell her about that morning too. Arizona didn't know exactly how close the two Torres women were, she just hoped Callie wouldn't recount their love making in detail to her mother. It would be so embarrassing. But she still had to tell anybody about her feelings for the brunette, and she really needed to tell somebody about what she just experienced. The best person was definitely Mark, so she shot him a quick text.
'Hey! Drinks tonight? Need to tell you something…'
He answered right away.
'Hey stranger! Good to know you're still alive, you weren't answering in the group chat. Tonight we are meeting up all together… You want to talk to me only?'
'Shit, sorry, I saw the notifications but I didn't read the messages… Yeah, actually I want to talk to you only…'
'Okay so what about we take a walk later? Say 3ish?'
'Okay, see you later'
She changed into some clean yoga pants and a hoodie and put her hair in a quick, messy pony tail. She grabbed her phone and keys and started walking to Mark's.
As soon as Mark saw Arizona, he hugged her tightly.
"Hey, blondie! You okay? You look… Different?", he asked, kind of confused by the expression on his best friend's face.
"Yeah… I've got so much to tell…"
"Is it about that hot Torres girl?"
"What? How do you know?"
"C'mon, you told me you went out a couple of times and then you've been looking for her during all of Webber's lesson yesterday… I'm your best friend, I know the look on your face when you see her…"
"Yeah, whatever…"
"So, it's her… What happened?"
So Arizona started recounting the events of the last couple of weeks, leading to their love making. When she got there she simply told Mark they had sex, without going into much detail. She usually told him everything but maybe he wasn't interest in girl-on-girl action. When she ended the story, he stopped walking and looked at her with a serious expression.
"What? Robbins, you just had steaming hot sex with that hot chick and you say it as if it was no big deal?"
"No! It's a big deal actually… But everything is so new, I'm not going on bragging about it. We still have a lot to figure out, we are scared as hell, I still don't know what I am… I mean, I had the best sex ever with her, and it was the first time with a girl for both of us, but yet it was so good… I'm scared just thinking about what we could have. She is stubborn as hell, more than me, and we are so similar in many things… But we don't know each other, like at all… So we agreed on taking this slow and see where it goes… I don't know what I'll be doing with my life in 3 months, but I know I want to give this a try. Mark… Does it mean I'm gay and I didn't realize it before?"
Mark hugged her a lot smaller friend tightly.
"No, Arizona, it's not that you need to label yourself. You happen to have feelings for a girl, doesn't mean you're gay. I get that that is a lot to figure out, I had a hard time myself at first, but you're one of the strongest women I know, you'll figure this out, you will… You should. She is HOT, Robbins… And she seems to like you really a lot. And the sex is good? No way I let you give up!", Mark said, never being able to be serious about anything.
"No, Mark, the sex is not good, it's awesome…", she corrected him.
"Yeah, whatever, I don't want to know, thanks… I haven't gotten laid since forever, so stop!"
They both started laughing and went on with their walk, talking about that night and about how they were going to celebrate with all their friends, without telling them the reason yet. Arizona felt her heart fluttering, she was happier than ever before, she felt like her life was going back to pieces after the almost two years she spent pining over that damned Jackson, now she felt calm and happy. She checked her phone and found a text from Callie, she smiled widely, her dimples popping and her eyes shining.
'Hey you, want to go on a date with me tomorrow?'
Yes, Calliope, yes!
