So after the meeting in the shed. The gang returned to Shrek's swamp to get ready for the talent show (which was that night btw). Immediately after getting in the house Shrek pulled down all the blinds, because he was sensitive to light and grabbed a box of saltine crackers and locked himself in a closet, crying for no apparent reason. After crying like a baby and eating almost all the crackers Shrek emerged from the closet finally deciding to actually do shit. He walked out the front door to see his friends were surrounded by metal boxes. "Hey what are those?" Shrek called out pointing at the nearest mystery box.

"Oh this?" One of the pigs answered."These will be the pyrotechnics used for the show dumbass."

Shrek trying to ignore being called a 'dumbass' asked, "What do we need these for? Did we have to pay for them because we're pretty poor aren't we."

"Well everyone thought at the end of your performance we should shoot plumes of fire on stage, it'll look so emo. Oh and I stole these so we don't have to pay for anything."

"Well...okay then, see ya later then." Shrek then waddled back into the house and plopped himself in front of his computer, his fingers poised above the keyboard. 'What should my song lyrics be?' Shrek was going to write a song for the talent show, but he didn't think about it before hand. So he currently had no idea on what he was going to say. Finally a dim lightbulb shown in his dark emo mind. His fingers flew across the keyboard typing his feelings, his tragedies, and of course his edginess. It took 3 hours to finally finish his song, but to him it was a masterpiece. Shrek checked his bat man clock, it read 5:00pm. The talent show started at 7:30. Shrek quickly memorized his song and started getting emo for his performance. As quick as an ogre eats an onion Shrek dyed parts of his hair green. He left his wig in the sun to dry and carefully started doing his makeup. He applied black lipstick and heavy amounts of black eyeliner. Since he didn't have nail polish he took a black sharpie and scribbled on his finger nails. He put red contacts into his eyes and a couple fake piercings in his lips. At last he adorned his ears with demon earrings and a couple of black bracelets. He pulled on his 'My Chemical Romance' t-shirt over a long sleeved fishnet shirt, ripped black skinny jeans, his usual black converse, and finally he placed a red hair clip in his wig to make sure only one of his eyes were covered.

He stepped out of his hut feeling confident for the first time in his life. Then he realized his performance was probably going to be ass so he went back to being emo again. He saw that his friends were jamming instruments into a rusty old black van. Shrek shuffled over watching the chaos unfold as everyone was rushing for time. Shrek saw Gingy and quickly approached him, "Um what are these instruments for."

Gingy glanced at him in surprise, "Did you expect the audience to be moved by your awful singing? Because if I was one of the judges I'd disqualify you." Shrek hung his head about to cry again. "But that's why we're here, to offer back up rhythm to your song."

"Oh, alright then," Shrek answered questionably. Finally after everything was loaded onto the van everyone got inside, but Shrek was too fat so he had to sit on top of the van with a couple pieces of string for a seat belt. After falling off the van only 7 times Shrek finally made it to the stage where the talent show would be held. Immediately the three little pigs trotted off to set up the pyrotechnics for the show. Shrek helped the others unload their instruments and set them up backstage. Shrek's heart was pounding, his chance of redemption was near.

End of Chapter Nine