Chapter 25 – Meet Me on the Equinox
Everything … everything ends.
Last time:
Tanya stood and took in the scope of destruction. "One day at a time, one room at a time."
Edward looked up at her, and in that moment the look in his eyes made him appear as helpless and innocent as a child. "Where's my family? Did they give up on me? How long was I … gone?"
"Edward…" Tanya measured her words carefully, not wanting to set him running off for the comfort of his internal refuge. "We're going to go meet with them in Forks. You don't have to stay there, but it's a trip you have to make. Trust me, the first step is some type of closure."
Edward's eyes glazed over. His complete silence and unfocused gaze alarmed Tanya; she got down on her knees before him. "Edward?"
When he didn't respond, Tanya moved to grab his shoulders in an effort to shake him back to her. There was no way she was going to let him slip away now that she had just gotten him back! However, Edward's hands flew up to catch her by the wrists, stopping her before she could touch him.
"Her…service…" he croaked, reading what was in Tanya's mind about Bella's memorial.
"Shit, Edward, I'm not very good at avoiding your brain eavesdropping at times. I let down my guard when I shouldn't have."
"I… I…" he stammered, turning an ominous two shades paler, as improbable as that seemed.
"It's okay. We have some time. I'll go with you," Tanya words rushed from her mouth as her muscles tensed in alarm. Edward was still so unstable, unpredictable.
"I… think… I think I'm going to be sick." Edward's eyes were wide with disbelief and confusion.
Tanya stared back, uncomprehending. "Sick? What do you mean s-"
But before she could interpret his meaning, Edward had bolted to the kitchen sink. A wet, retching sound originated from deep inside him before he leaned into the sink. A fountain of red fluid surged from his mouth and nose, staining the pristine white porcelain.
It continued to flow in a violent, continuous stream until Tanya swore more had come out of him than could have possibly gone in.
Once it slowed to a trickle, Edward clutched his abdomen with one hand and supported his weight with the other by gripping the side of the counter. Tanya could see his knees going weak and rushed to support him.
"What the hell?" Tanya exclaimed as she came up under Edward's arm, wrapping it around her shoulder so he could lean on her. He gratefully shuffled alongside her as she guided him from the kitchen to the disarrayed living room. She upturned an ottoman with her foot and eased Edward down. "That was probably the freakiest thing I ever saw."
Tanya had never see blood voluntarily come out of a vampire once it had been consumed. It just didn't happen. "I guess I didn't agree with you," she surmised.
She vanished from his side to return with a dishtowel. "Are you…okay?" Tanya asked with apprehension as she dropped to her knees to gently wipe away the fluid dripping down his mouth and chin.
With dazed eyes, Edward looked at her and pleaded, "I can't go, Tanya. Please, don't make me go."
Again, she regretted not locking down her thoughts about Bella's memorial. "Okay, okay. Enough talking … or thinking about the events in the future. Like I said, one day at a time," she appeased while calculating just how much time she had to prepare him for the trip.
"Two days," Edward groaned as he lowered his head into his hands.
"Sorry … again. I have to learn how to keep my big mind shut."
"It's my fault."
"Excuse me? What's your fault?"
Edward raised his head and gave Tanya a lethal stare.
"No, really, Edward. I'm not following your tangential thoughts. What exactly is your fault?"
"Bella. What happened to her … all my fault."
"How is a car accident your fault?"
"I made her promises I didn't keep. She was so angry." He sprang up and began to pace in tight circles, pulling at his disheveled hair. "She was probably driving too fast in the Vanquish and lost control. And it's my fault."
Tanya could tell Edward wasn't thinking straight, but he seemed willing to babble. The more information she could get out him, the easier her job would be, so she encouraged him. "What kind of promises did you make?"
"I told her I'd change her once we were married. But then … well, she wanted to stay human, at least for a while. And she was so happy that way. Able to be with her family, go to college. She was working on getting her degree in teaching … a daytime career. Bella was becoming the person she was meant to be, the person she would have been had she not met me.
"I started to believe she had changed her mind, and she was letting me off the hook. Believing I wouldn't have to damn her soul and crush her dreams was like having a weight lifted from my shoulders. I was so relieved."
"But then she pushed you again … wanting to be like us," Tanya continued for him.
"I doubted it was best for her. I'm older … wiser. But now look what has happened! If I wanted to be with her, I should have done something to guarantee she'd stay forever. Humans are so fragile. I should have done what she asked."
"Sounds to me like you put yourself into a no-win situation, Edward. Which did you want? For Bella to live forever as a blood-drinking vampire with a damned soul, or as a human who could live a normal, rich life but accepting it would be for a limited time?"
"I thought keeping her human meant no regrets. I was just so afraid of her hating me for turning her into a monster."
Tanya sighed. She knew what Edward meant. It was one of the main reasons she had never ventured to turn any of her human lovers. There were too many variables she couldn't plan for. She couldn't very well ask if her lover wished to be a vampire – once she revealed what she was, well, either he became a vampire or he died a human since it was the only way to keep the secret. And what if he agreed and she couldn't control the newborn she had created? The answer to those questions would be death from the Volturi.
But worse yet, what if her newborn lover couldn't refrain from human blood or hated what he had become? She would be alone with her guilt of more murder, and what she already carried for her own murderous past was already a heavy burden to bear, one which she felt she could never fully atone for.
Despite the fact that both she and Edward were leading honorable existences as "vegetarians," they had both taken countless lives on their journey to enlightenment. Yet, even now, just like a recovering addict, the potential to fall off the wagon was always lurking just under the façade of control. The lustfulness for human blood was always – always – there.
"She loved you. And she had her family and schooling … she was happy, Edward. It was obvious how much you loved each other and you both sacrificed for that love."
"I shouldn't have said I'd do it."
"I understand now that you were fighting. Your last words to each other might not have been what you wanted them to be. But her death was an horrible, unfortunate accident."
Edward shuddered as he dropped to sit on the floor like a marionette that just had its strings cut.
"Listen, Edward, you are not to blame. You loved her the best way you knew how. I'm sorry it ended so soon, but there are no guarantees in life – vampire or human. Besides, you two had something many of us have never found, and for that, you need to be grateful. Cherish the time you had together."
"It hurts so much, emotionally and physically … it just hurts" Edward whispered. Everything about him ached.
"I know," Tanya empathized, crouching to wrap her arms around Edward and wishing she could absorb his pain. "It's going to take time. And you will never be the same. But life goes on and, in time, it will become a part of who you are. But it doesn't have to condemn you."
"She gave my life purpose. She redefined me. I was becoming who I wanted to be."
"She didn't change you, you changed yourself. Bella was your inspiration. And she still can be. What a beautiful way to honor her memory. Think about what she would have wanted for you, and be that."
"I don't know if I can. I don't know if I'm strong enough."
"You don't have to be strong enough - alone. We will help support you, Edward."
He pushed out of Tanya's embrace. "I don't want to be a burden, and object of pity."
"I was taught love is never a burden. It's a gift; I think you also learned that. Let us love you, Edward."
It was all she had to offer him. He had known unconditional love from Bella, and through that experience, she hoped he could now accept it from his family. It would make all the difference in the outcome of his life.
Tanya's beeping cell phone interrupted the long span of silence. She reached into her back pocket and glanced at the text message. It was from Alice: "I don't know what you did, but Edward will be at the service. See you soon."
Edward had insisted on eighteen straight hours of repairs to the house, before collapsing in bed to sob tearlessly into Bella's pillow.
During all that time, Tanya had only left his side briefly to hunt and bring Edward back some blood. He resisted drinking until Tanya reasoned with him. He couldn't be unprepared at the memorial; there would be humans at the service and "in control" were not the words Tanya would use to describe him his state of being.
In fact, she had begun to think Edward was stalling, and feared Alice had been incorrect about their arrival at the memorial. Only now, as they flew west in a chartered plane for Seattle, could she see that all the work on the house had most likely been a desperate tactic to keep his mind distracted. He was trying so hard to be strong….
Tanya watched as he continued to struggle with his emotional control, fidgeting in his seat with the energy created by his unrelenting inner turmoil. She placed her hand over Edward's and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
Edward looked over at her, his expression now blank. "When I return to Orford, I intend to speak with the investigator of the … accident. I want answers."
They were the first words Edward had spoken since they had left the airport three hours ago, yet Tanya felt encouraged to hear Edward had spoken in the future tense…
"I still have not made any promises," Edward responded to her thoughts.
Then ponder this, if your soul is damned, then you cannot be with her in the afterlife, so what would be the point of dying?
Edward's facial expression made it known he was stunned by Tanya's forthright thoughts.
"Well?" she confronted him out loud. "What would be the purpose of ending your life?"
"No more wishing things could have been different. It would end that pain."
"Maybe for you, but what about Carlisle and Esme … and the rest of us? What of our pain and guilt over not being able to stop you?"
"I don't care to spar with you anymore, Tanya. Your rhetoric exhausts me."
Because you know I'm right.
Edward shook his head, but allowed Tanya to have the last word … or thought, in this case.
Their plane landed almost four hours later at three in the morning at a private airport outside of Seattle. Gathering their bags, Tanya made her way to the car Emmett had left for them. Edward followed.
"I'm not looking forward to their thoughts," he commented once inside the car, picking up his brother's scent.
"You've handled my thoughts very well." Tanya smiled softly as she pulled down the visor and caught the key fob.
"You didn't love her. They did. Especially Alice."
"I know. And, I told you, you don't have to stay. They at least deserve to know you are going to be okay."
Edward returned his gaze to the front window and sat quietly, unmoving until they reached the Forks area. Then he began to move in quick, compact, agitated movements. This behavior intensified coming to head as he blurted out, "Stop the car!"
"Edward, we're still…"
"I don't care! This is close enough. Stop or I'll get out now."
"Okay, okay. Pulling over," Tanya relented not wanting to push him too hard. They were so close…
As soon as the car was hidden behind some roadside brush, Edward bolted. Tanya gave pursuit. Priding herself on being just a bit faster than Edward, she moved in step next to him as forest greenery blurred past them.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"I don't know. Acting on instinct."
"Instinct to run. Where are you running to – or from?" Please don't make me…
"No, you are not going to have to restrain me," Edward responded flatly.
"Are we hunting, then?"
"No, just taking the long way."
Tanya tried to determine Edward's thoughts by the look on his face. All she could see was cold, hardened resolve. She chose to give him peace, closing her mouth and occupying her mind with the passing scenery. She was just … there. There for him.
And they ran.
Tanya was not completely familiar with the area, but within a few hours the mixture of familiar scents, though hardly ever found together in the same location, filled her nose and she knew the Cullen home was not too far ahead. Of course Edward would know the service was being held at his house; she wasn't good at shielding her thoughts from him.
Switching suddenly to a human walking speed, Edward watched as Tanya blew past him and had to backtrack.
Edward?
"Our house is just up ahead, over the river."
"I guessed that. The hodgepodge smell of vampire, human, and wolf is unmistakable."
Edward slowed his pace even more, perplexing Tanya. The service was about to start. What was going through his head?
"Edward, we're both a muddy mess, and you haven't changed clothes since before I arrived in Orford. Do you plan to sneak in and find a change of clothes for the both of us?"
"The house was closed down before Bella … I don't know if my brothers and sisters brought extra clothes."
Then Edward stopped moving all together.
"Okay, I give up. What are you doing?" Tanya threw up her arms in frustration. "You do know the rest of us can't read minds, right?"
"I told you I'd come here. I owe it to Bella to be present – she'd do no less for me. But I'm not going any closer. You can go."
Tanya's boot heels dug into the soft ground and her hands perched firmly on her hips. Edward didn't need to read her thoughts to know her choice.
"Or not," he added with a shrug.
With a squishy pop, Edward leapt off from the wet ground, landing on a sturdy tree branch above him. Tanya followed him as he scaled the thick pine until the large white house came into view over the tree tops.
When Tanya reached the same branch Edward sat perched overlooking the house, she understood. "This wasn't exactly what I meant by attending her service, Edward. Was this your plan all along?"
He didn't respond.
Tanya shook her head. Had she really thought it was going to be easy? "Of course this was your plan. I forgot … avoidance is your style."
Ignoring her biting comment, Edward stared through the back wall of windows. All the furniture, which would have been covered with large sheets of plastic, had been removed. Instead the room was arranged with neat rows of chairs divided into two sections by an aisle down the middle. The chairs faced the windows, and Edward could see every troubled face in the room. And when they raised their eyes to gaze out the windows at the gray sky, it appeared they were looking right at him. Right through him.
Their thoughts reached him, however, and he didn't try to avoid them. He let them all rush in until they buzzed around in his head like a hive of disturbed bees. With no one thought distinguishable from another, the din was almost numbing. Tolerable. Truth be told, Edward knew it was the act of a coward to avoid their specific thoughts. And in that moment, he was secretly grateful he did not possess Jasper's gift.
Some of the attendees had already taken a seat. Charlie was there, as was Renee. They sat on opposite sides of the aisle. Renee's hands busily twisted a small wad of limp tissues as Phil watched over her with concern. Billy, Seth, Leah, Sam and Emily, Jared, Embry, and Quil were seated also, stoically representing the wolves. Edward sensed Jacob was present somewhere, but his thoughts and exact location escaped Edward's detection.
The rest of the guests milled around the room, stopping at "stations" which had been set up around the perimeter of chairs. Each station, a long table covered with a rich, rose-colored cloth, represented a significant timeline in Bella's life.
The first table, closest to the door, displayed pictures of Bella as an infant - pictures Edward never had the chance to see. Even as a baby, her eyes were so … captivating. Other treasured mementoes were arranged around the picture frames: a lock of hair from Bella's first haircut, her first pair of shoes, and a framed poem entitled Mommy and Me.
Moving clockwise around the room, the next table held pictures and keepsakes from Bella's childhood: a gleaming tee ball trophy, a hand-made sundress in a cheery purple polka-dot print, and a collection of exceptional grade school report cards.
The following table highlighted Bella's junior and high school years. Her favorite worn, dog-eared classics were stacked in one corner, while the photo album she had made her senior year lay open at the opposite end of the table. It was there that Mike, Jessica, Angela, and Eric dwelled, slowly turning pages and bowing their heads in sad disbelief. It was also at this station Edward saw the first evidence of his presence in Bella's life: Prom tickets, her pressed wrist corsage, and the invitation to the graduation party Alice had planned.
However, the most elaborate station was two tables in length. Dedicated to their wedding day, it was decorated in strings of wisteria flowers that were braided together to border the edges of the table. Invitations, party favors, and pictures crowded the space. In the center a twenty-four inch flat screen TV played their wedding video in a continuous loop. From the screen, Edward watched Bella cheeks flush as she made her way down the aisle. Her eyes gleamed with traces of tears and the corners of her smile twitched revealing her nervous energy. She was warm, vibrant, and beautiful. It had been the most wonderful moment of his life seeing her come closer and closer, knowing she had chosen him out of all others.
Unexpectedly, a lone wolf howl pierced the forest serenity, sending birds scattering toward the heavy sky. It was soon joined by a chorus of baying wolves in what Edward could only interpret as a soulful salute to Bella. In the large room, many eyes moved to the wall of windows, confusion coloring their expressions.
Without looking back at her, Edward removed Tanya's clamped hand from his shoulder. "Don't worry. They aren't aware of our presence."
"Sorry. I'm not used to be afraid of anything – except the law, of course," Tanya stammered. Pushing aside her fear, she changed the subject, "Alice certainly has shown how much she loved Bella. Everything is just … right."
As if on cue, Jacob emerged from the line of trees closest to the house. He was wearing black dress pants and a dark blue button-down shirt. He flung his tie to the ground before entering the house. Edward watched Jacob move straight to his seat next to Billy, his expression bitter. Jacob refused to look toward any of the displays. Instead, he glared out the windows. His piercing eyes made it clear Jacob indeed knew he was out there … hiding.
Edward felt a pang of envy in regards to Jacob and Bella's mystic connection. To his chagrin, he reluctantly noted Jacob was present for Bella in a way he was not.
Mr. Weber making his way to the front of the room drew Edward's attention away from Jacob. When he addressed the mourners, his voice was gentle, "We come together not as friends or acquaintances or neighbors, but as one family. Today, we will share our love for a special person. A young woman who touched us all with her quiet strength and selflessness. She was our sister, our daughter…"
Edward flinched as he heard Mr. Weber stumble mentally on the words "and a wife". He clutched his abdomen as dread ripped through every petrified cell of his body – he could no longer live in denial in listening to Mr. Weber's words. Bella was really gone.
Edward's mind entered a free fall and he reached out to steady himself while from behind Tanya wordlessly took his hand. Instinct shouted in his mind to run … but just as loud were Tanya's words: I forgot avoidance is your style. Edward felt the strong urge to pull inward, to disavow the world around him and end the pain that burned inside him as intensely as the fires of transition. The flaming ache left nothing inside him except a charred, useless wasteland. As he watched from distance, he felt he had become nothing, an empty shell with no purpose or worth.
Inside the white house, Jasper shifted uneasily in his seat.
Seeking refuge from the ugly blackness within, Edward threw his mind into the thoughts of those seated in the rented chairs, starting with the person he believed could offer relief from the stinging bite of reality: Jessica.
True to form, Jessica was critiquing the apparel of the women in attendance. In her trivial opinion, Alice's dress was too short, Rose's showed too much cleavage, Esme should have showed more cleavage, and she doubted poor Leah could ever gather enough chest flesh to even make cleavage…
Edward half listened as he searched for courage, drawing strength from firmness of Tanya's hand that had taken his. With his other hand, he dug his fingers into the bark and wood of the tree, willing himself to be brave for Bella … even as Charlie's hostile thoughts branded him a coward for being a "no show." Edward knew he could never stand up to Charlie's disappointment and grief in person, so instead he withstood every insult his father-in-law mentally hurled at him. They slashed his mind and heart as harshly as a flogger's whip.
In an involuntary gesture of self-preservation, he drew his arms around his body as he focused on Charlie's anger, accusations, and endless pleas to understand why. But sensing his emotions were escalating to a dangerous level, Charlie abruptly followed in Edward's footsteps, seeking relief in other considerations. To Edward's surprise, Charlie began picking through every detail of the police report on Bella's accident.
Other than the twinge of shame Edward felt for not being present during the investigation, this was something Edward could latch on to – black and white facts that didn't threaten his control or question his qualifications as a husband.
The report was thorough, in Charlie's estimation, but lacking in hard evidence, forcing investigators to draw conclusions… Charlie shook his head as if wanting to avoid something, and Sue leaned forward to catch his attention and mouth "are you alright?"
Not wanting to alarm or burden her, Edward watched as Charlie contradicted his thoughts and nodded. But he wasn't "alright." Something in the report upset him greatly, so much so, Charlie tried to force the details out of his thoughts … but he couldn't.
Edward focused exclusively on Charlie's mind, shoving out all other thoughts. As he listened, Charlie began to backpedal, discounting the report, trashing the skills of the investigating officers, questioning fine points that might have been missed, and doubting the validity of the facts. As if refusing to be denied, the words of the concluding summary vivid jumped off the report into the grieving father's mind. Edward quickly learned a witness claimed he had seen a young woman matching Bella's description driving an Aston Martin at excessive speeds through the park. This fact, combined with the lack of skid marks at the scene, indicated the cause of the accident was…
"No! No, no, no!" Edward emphatically refuted the specifics coming from Charlie's mind. He dropped from the tree like a stone, startling Tanya who had been listening intently to Mr. Weber's concluding words of consolation.
"Edward!" She called after him as he blurred from view.
What the hell? She jumped from the towering height, nearly hitting the ground running. Following his scent she tracked him running toward the house. Tanya panicked and pushed herself harder to reach him – he was moving too fast – everyone would see him!
"Edward! Slow down! They'll see!" Tanya called after him. While Edward did not respond to her directive, the vampires in the house stirred in their chairs - everyone except Alice, who was frozen in the throes of a vision.
Trained to wait until Alice surfaced from the images in her head, no one moved. But as soon as Alice snapped out her trance, she was up and excusing herself from the row of chairs she shared with a few members of Bella's extended family as well as Rose, Emmett, and Jasper. In response, Jasper stood, almost too quickly, hastily following her through the room and out the front door. Many heads had turned to question the impolite disruption.
"What do we do?" Rose muttered to her husband too quietly for non-vampire ears. Emmett shrugged slightly as his eyes met Carlisle and Esme's. Carlisle shook his head once indicating not to disturb the service as Charlie was now in the front of the room sharing heartfelt memories of his daughter.
Once clear of the house full of distraught guests, Jasper zeroed in on Edward's emotional turmoil and plotted an intercept course. Alice immediately mirrored his movement.
"He's out of control! We have to stop him," Alice confirmed what Jasper now understood.
"He's hell-bent determined! This isn't going to be pretty."
Alice nodded. "I know. Remember, decide at the very last moment..."
Lowering their heads and gathering speed, Jasper and Alice pushed to get as far from the house as possible in the seconds that remained before they closed the space between them and Edward . . . in just a few more strides.
CRACK!
The collision between Jasper and Edward sent a shockwave of sound in all directions. It bounced off the trees, but the unique sound easily penetrated the walls of Cullen home and was recognized immediately by all vampire ears.
Immediately, Esme turned to Carlisle. "Go," she whispered urgently to Carlisle as she gracefully rose from her chair drawing attention toward herself. Eyes watched as she joined Charlie in front of the room and she placed her hand on his arm in a gesture that encouraged him to continue though he struggled with his composure. Thankful for the distraction, Carlisle did his best to slide out of the room unnoticed.
Carlisle darted for the trees, picking up speed as soon as he was concealed within them. In the chilly, moisture-laden wind, he picked up the familiar scent of his family: Alice, Jasper, Tanya, and Edward.
Edward, what are you doing? Carlisle thought as he closed in on the ruckus just ahead of him. Bursting into an area that had been cleared of all underbrush by the two struggling vampires in front of him, Carlisle witnessed Jasper barely restraining Edward by pinning his arms behind him, while Alice held his face in her hands. Though no words were exchanged, Carlisle could see Alice was pleading mentally with Edward. He tried to turn his head away, but she kept bringing his eyes back to hers. Tanya stood just behind Jasper wearing a look of confusion and dismay.
"Edward, stop this!" Carlisle demanded his obedience and attention. At the sound of his sire's voice, Edward's muscles instinctively ceased resisting.
"Son," Carlisle spoke with concern as he approached, "do you still wish to expose us?"
"No. I would never…," Edward began to reply, but then remembered there was a time not long ago when he would have exposed their secret. "Carlisle, they think Bella … they think she ended her own life! Suicide! We can't let them think that of her!"
Edward heard in his father and sibling's minds that they had already known of the report and its conclusions. Their heads and eyes dropped to the forest floor.
"Stop! I don't want your pity! She didn't do it. Carlisle, you know Bella would never choose that!" Edward's eyes snapped to Alice, "And no, she didn't try to kill herself, Alice. The cliff jumping was for the adrenaline rush that produced my image. She explained that to you! Didn't you believe her?"
"Edward," Carlisle's dulcet tone contradicted the hysteria in Edward's voice, "we know you two were fighting the day of her accident…"
"So you think she intentionally ended her life?" Edward's words hit back. "Bella is the most unselfish person I've ever met. How could you even think about her in that way! I may have been a coward when I tried to end my life, but Bella never would do such a thing."
"People who end their own lives aren't being selfish, Edward, they are trying to end their own intolerable pain."
"This is different. It was just an argument. She wanted to be with me forever, and I was being ... difficult. No, I'll never accept this. I know her. Bella did not end her life."
Jasper released Edward and stood at his side. "Edward's right, Carlisle. The facts don't add up. Our experiments have proved it."
Edward's eyes narrowed and his muscles tensed as he listened simultaneously to the astounding theories running through Carlisle and Jasper's minds.
"What?"
Edward reeled backwards and Tanya placed her hands on his back to steady him.
"Those Volturi bastards killed her?" Edward hissed, glaring at Carlisle.
This time Tanya responded in shock and anger, pointing her finger accusingly in Carlisle's direction. "You know this to be true?"
By now all eyes had widened in disbelief in Carlisle's direction, stunned their leader would withhold such information from them.
"No, I don't. I have no proof. It's just … Jasper doesn't believe this was an accident, and I've been trying to think of who else might have been involved if that is in fact true. The Volturi are the only ones I could think of who might have a motive to harm Bella."
"Because I didn't change her." Edward hung his head in guilt, and then jerked it up almost immediately, lashing out, "But Alice … you would have seen!"
"Edward, I promise you, I've been watching. I swear! But I haven't seen Aro in our future. Actually … I haven't seen him at all. He's vanished."
"How could he do that?" Edward questioned Carlisle directly.
"Alice's gift is still mostly a mystery. I don't have that answer."
"Well, he can't hide from me," Edward snarled.
"You can't just walk into the castle making accusations!" Alice cautioned seeing Edward's hastily laid plan to travel to Volterra.
"All right! Everyone just stop and think logically," Carlisle stated, trying to slow the building momentum of what was tantamount to a suicide mission – at best. "You need more than a hunch to confront the Volturi. Alone, Edward, you will fail. They have made it clear there would be no second chances for you. Besides, Aro craves your talent too much; he'd find a way to convince you to stay in your weakened state of mind."
"You don't have to go alone. I'll go with you."
All heads turned in surprise in Tanya's direction.
She stood taller, raising her chin in defiance, "They broke my family, and I won't let them get the satisfaction of doing it to another. What Sasha did may have been wrong, but she did it out of love - a foreign concept to them. I have had a long time to process this. The Volturi punish with no remorse, no compassion. Their pious reign of terror cannot continue unchecked. They are setting our race back instead of moving it forward."
Taken aback by the conviction in her words and her change of heart toward the vampire rulers, no one spoke.
"I have lived in fear of them long enough," she added. "Edward has the right to know what happened to Bella, and if that means a trip to Volterra, count me in."
"Now wait…" Carlisle raised his hands to calm the gathering storm of determination.
"Me too, Edward. They have many gifted vampires at their disposal, but I may be able to sense something that can prove or disprove our theory," Jasper volunteered, undeterred by Carlisle's concerns.
"Theory? What theory?" Alice demanded. "I hope you don't expect me to stay here and wait while you three storm into Volterra accusing the most powerful vampire coven of attacking our family without a shred of evidence?"
Carlisle moved to Alice's side. "She has a valid point. We are all shaken by Bella's death, but we can't go off to Volterra half-cocked." Jasper and Edward looked away, disappointed in Carlisle's willingness to turn the other cheek so easily – until he added, "We'll need to find some kind of proof first … and if we do, we'll make them regret the day they ever heard the name Cullen."
A/N: You tell 'em Daddy C! *waves pompoms* I'm so Team Carlisle!
*Ahem* Anyway...the plot thickens! I know many of you have begged for Edward to figure out the truth, but these things take time - besides, we need some wild, blood-craving Bella newborn before the HEA (so be prepared for that next chapter - Bella does not have the benefit of a cozy Cullen Coven to ease her transition to vampire life). And what of Gianna and Dominic! All this will be addressed next chapter, my dear sweet readers!
Another teachable moment: Carlisle uses the phase "go off half-cocked." In America, to 'go off half-cocked' means to speak or act impulsively and without proper preparation. The origins of this saying comes from the 1700's Flintlock guns that had a 'cock' or striker mechanism, which is held in a raised, sprung position ready to discharge (*snickers* Sorry, I have a dirty cougar mind) and make a spark to fire the gun. These can be set at half-cock, meaning the gun is in a safe state, or at full-cock, when it is ready to be fired. A gun would only 'go off at half-cock' by mistake. Now you know...
See you in two weeks - teaser of chapter 26 for anyone who requests it...
