CHAPTER V
Pasts
Riza cried as the man forcefully removed her clothes. Her hands were bound together and were tied to the bedpost above her head. Riza, with all the force left on her, tried to kick him off but he won't even budge. "You're my girlfriend and you will do what I want you to." He said when he finally removed all of Riza's clothing. She screamed loudly, hoping someone would come and help her get away from this monster.
Riza woke up screaming. She sat and wiped her tears away with the back of her hand as soon as she realized that she had another nightmare. A nightmare when I don't even recall going to bed. Just as she was about to think of where she was, Roy opened up the door to the room, a look of panic was obvious in his eyes. "I heard screaming. I went to Ellie but she was still sleeping, so it couldn't have been her. Are you alright, Riza? Er, I mean, Miss Hawkeye?"
Riza was embarrassed beyond words. She buried her face in her hands and spoke almost unintelligibly. "I'm sorry." Roy sat beside her, with still enough distance so she wouldn't think he was taking advantage of her. "What's wrong, Miss Hawkeye?" He said out of concern. Riza removed her hands from her face and looked at Roy. How ironic, she thought, when she was dreaming about a monster but woke up to see a knight in shining armor in front of her instead. She tried her best to smile at him. "Please, it's Riza. You can call me Riza when it's just us." (See what I did there?)
Roy gave her a comforting smile. "And it's Roy. By the way, in case you're wondering why you're in my room, you...uhh, kinda fell asleep when you tucked Ellie in. I, uhm, carried you all the way here and don't fret, I slept on the couch in the living room." Riza couldn't help but laugh slightly. She asked for help and it came in the form of Roy. "Sorry I woke you up, Roy. And I'm so sorry I fell asleep here in the first place." Riza looked at him, feeling sincerely sorry. This man must've been really tired from work all day and he might have been looking forward to sleep peacefully in the night. Yet, she had to disturb even that. However, Roy just shook his head and grinned at her. "Don't worry because believe it or not, I love sleeping in the couch." They shared a laugh at what he said.
Riza scooted over and patted the space beside her; Roy didn't hesitate, he sat beside her. They were seated so closely that Roy suddenly felt cold and nervous. What am I?! 10 years old?!
It was quiet, the kind that makes Roy uncomfortable sometimes. So he started to share with Riza. "Vanessa." Riza looked at him, confused at the mention of the name. Roy continued, "Ellie's mom." Riza let out a small 'oh' and leaned her back against the headboard again. "She left us just a few days after getting out of the hospital. See, we didn't live together. So, one day, she left Ellie with me, she said she was just going to buy some stuff for her but she never returned. I waited, called her a hundred times but she never picked up. Looked for her everywhere; turns out she left the country that very day. That's when it hit me; she wanted revenge and she thought leaving Ellie in my care would be the best revenge for forcing her not to abort the child." Roy sighed. "It was painful, you know. I realized she was never coming back not even for our daughter's sake. I told my mother about what happened, she asked me what I was going to do. I said, I'm going to raise Ellie by myself. Vanessa thought I was going to be devastated if I were to raise Ellie alone but I'm not. Of course there were times when I felt like giving up and I just want to jump off a building or something. But, I knew better than to leave Ellie too. I love my daughter way too much that sometimes I ask myself why Vanessa had the heart to abandon her."
Riza just looked at him with sad eyes; not knowing what to say. Still, she tried her best to comfort him. "You're a good father, Roy. Not a lot of men would've done what you did. You raised Ellie to be such a kind and sweet girl. You've accomplished that." He smiled at her. "Thank you though I wouldn't take all the credit. My mom and sisters did help me. And you; thanks for being there for Ellie. You're a great person. She even said she wants to be like you when she grows up." Riza sat straight, faced him and laughed at what he just said. "A kindergarten teacher?" Absentmindedly, Roy reached out his hand, slowly pushed some stray hair from her face and tucked it behind her left ear. "Probably. But what she said was; 'I want to be kind and pretty like her."
Riza looked down to hide her blushing face. It has been years since she went out with someone and this has been the first time in years that her heart beat so fast. She felt so embarrassed by the fact that she was acting like a sixteen year old; and with the father of her student too. "Riza." She snapped back to reality when she heard Roy's voice call for her. "Yes, Roy?"
"I hope you know that you really are an amazing woman and I am very grateful that Ellie has someone like you to look up to." He stopped and smiled. "I really don't mind if she grows up to be like you. If she would, then I would have a lot of boys to fend off." Riza couldn't help but smile at what he said. "Now you're just teasing." She said in response.
He loved it. Being awake in the dead of the night and talking and sharing a few laughs with Riza. If he were still the same man from before, they wouldn't be laughing and talking; they would be making out and, well, you know what comes after that. Everything was going well until Riza suddenly quieted down and said his name. "Roy." Roy looked at her. "Yes?" He responded. "I need to tell you something. Can I trust you?" She said as she leaned her head against his right shoulder.
Roy was taken aback; his heartbeat sped up about two times its normal rhythm. Here they were, the woman he just so adores leaning against his shoulder, at almost 2 A.M. too. "Of course, Riza." He responded.
Maybe it was the quietness and the stillness of the room that made her suddenly feel the urge to tell him about her deepest, darkest secret. Still, she thought it would be only fair if she told him her past too. After all, he did share his past with her. She didn't look up at him, she just leaned against his shoulder. "I screamed because of a nightmare." She scoffed. "Funny, right?"
Roy, feeling more confident now, wrapped his right arm around her shoulders. "It's not. I know full well how nightmares could feel so realistic sometimes." Riza then continued, "Well, two years ago, I had this abusive boyfriend. I lived with him for a couple of months. At first his brutalities were tolerable. I would...I would come home after school, only to get slapped and punched and kicked if I arrived home later than 5:00 PM." Tears trickled down her face but she wiped them off. Roy listened, pained by the fact that she was abused like that when he wanted to treat her like a queen. "One day, though, I came home at around 6:00 coz I had this meeting with my superiors. I tried to explain it to him but he was drunk and wouldn't listen." At that point, Riza couldn't stop her tears anymore. She cried and Roy held her close to his chest, hoping it would somehow ease her pain. However, she proceeded to tell him about her past. "That night, he tied me up to our bed, literally ripped the clothes off me and just...raped me for what felt like hours-hellish hours. At that time, I just wanted to die, you know. He was a monster, a demon in my eyes. Fortunately, our neighbors heard me screaming and they alerted the authorities. He was tried and got sent to prison and I stayed in my father's place for about a few months. Which, by the way, also included my frequent trips to the psychiatrist. Then, I decided I wanted to teach at the Kindergarten again. The school gladly accepted me back. Now, I realized the nightmares will never stop and I just have to live with it till I die."
Roy was speechless, he had a tough past but Riza's was worse. He held her closer, closing his eyes as he tried to take it all in. He was furious but he kept it all to himself. If Riza needed anything now, it wasn't another angry man, she just needed somebody who she could share her pains with. It must've been very hard for her to tell him all that. "Riza, I...I don't know what to say." Riza sat up and held his face so he was looking right at her. "You don't have to say anything." She kept her hand on his cheek as Roy wiped her tears away with his hand. For what seemed like hours, they looked each other in the eye until Roy leaned in closer to her and kissed her lips. Riza was stunned, her eyes widened. Yet, she gave in and kissed him back. She closed her eyes and kissed him passionately. Both their hearts beating out of their chests.
Roy gently laid her down as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She tangled her hands in his soft, black hair. Roy was on top of her, his one arm placed just above her head as he used the other to gently hold her nape. They parted to breathe for a few seconds but continued right back. Their breathing became ragged as they continued making out.
Roy honestly thought that they were going to do it but he stopped himself. He pulled off from the kiss and just stared at Riza's amber eyes. She was just as surprised as he was. So he kissed her deeply one more time before he sat back up on the bed. Riza did too and hugged him from behind, her arms loosely wrapped around his stomach. "Sorry, Riza. I didn't mean to." He buried his face in his hands. "Oh, God, I'm an idiot. I hope you'd forgive me." Roy faced Riza and embraced her; breathing in her hair that faintly smelled of strawberries.
"It's alright, you're not an idiot. Don't dwell on it too much." She smiled at him as they ended their embrace. Roy got up from his bed, still holding Riza's hand. "I'm gonna...uh, have to go back to the couch, okay? Are you gonna be okay here?" She nodded. He kissed her forehead and made his way back to the living room where he would spend the remaining few hours of the night thinking about what just happened.
Needless to say, neither Roy nor Riza fell back asleep after what happened in the room. It was all so sudden and unexpected. At five, Roy got up and decided to prepare breakfast early. He made his way to the kitchen. He collected the ingredients he needed to cook Ellie's favorite food: pancakes.
He was just mixing the batter for the pancakes when Riza came out from his room. He was greeted by her with a smile on her face. "Hi." She said almost shyly. Roy stopped mixing the batter to give her his full attention. "Hey, good morning. Uhm, did you sleep well?" Riza shook her head, she couldn't lie. "I didn't get any sleep after I woke up from the nightmare." Roy's guilt weighed in on him again. Riza told him her burden yet all he did was let his inner pervert take the lead. "Uh, I really am sorry about earlier."
Riza walked over to where he stood. She then went on tiptoes and reached for his lips and kissed him then and there. Roy had no time to be surprised, he wanted it. So he kissed her back, placing his hands on her hips. After breaking their kiss, Riza told him, "Sorry, I used a little bit of your mouthwash in the bathroom." She laughed. No wonder she tasted familiar.
A/N: Another chapter! Shoutout to the people who never forget to review! *blows virtual kisses* Anyway, this chapter is...well, chapter five. Personally, I know what being awake with someone at almost 2 A.M. feels like. It honestly brings out your deepest, darkest secrets. That is, of course, if you're not focused on your gadgets like you (and I) are probably doing now. Okay, time to say goodbye! If you could, please leave a review or follow or favorite. But if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Ps editing using a phone is so hard. Ughh
