A/N: Wishing Kangofu-CB the happiest day of birth. I hope you enjoy this and thank you for letting me write you a thing!

A/N2: Title inspired by the HAIM song by the same name.

A/N3: Always, always thanks to Ro for beta reading and supporting me. You are, quite literally, the best. I also want to thank ChronicWhimsy, who graciously gave me another set of eyes and editing on this.

Warnings: angst, language, sex

Pairings: 2x3

Ready for You

Chapter 5

It took ten days.

Three days of radio silence, in which Trowa stewed in irritation.

At Duo.

At Heero.

At himself.

Why, after all, did it even matter?

He enjoyed spending time with Duo, enjoyed arguing with him, enjoyed the feel of Duo's smooth hands on him and the look in Duo's eyes after they kissed.

But there were other people Trowa could… enjoy. People less complicated. People who mattered less. People who knew less.

If Duo wanted to pull away, he should let him. There was nothing wrong with a strategic retreat. And hadn't Heero warned him to be careful anyway?

On the fourth day, Trowa messaged Duo.

Let me know if Avery fails his exams. We can celebrate.

It was almost embarrassing, how much thought Trowa had put into those few words.

He hoped it amused Duo, hoped the petty suggestion earned at least the ghost of a smirk. Hoped the implication that Trowa wanted to see Duo again was clear.

He hoped Duo responded.

It took another day.

A day that, Trowa hoped, the apprentices would forget after Trowa bought them a round at the bar that night. He had not been charitable towards them at all, not after he came in early and found that they had left a pallet of oak planks outside over the weekend. It had, of course, rained almost every day.

Every single plank, planks that Trowa had meticulously hand-cut, planed and sanded down, was bowed or cupped.

Harlan would have spent the morning muttering and then let it go. Trowa verbally eviscerated the pair of them as soon as they came in, and spent the day tacking sneering addendums of 'if you don't mind not ruining this too' onto the end of any interaction he had with either apprentice.

It wasn't until the end of the work day, when Sarah gave him a look and Harlan frowned at the way the apprentices made no move to punch out, but instead continued to furiously sweep as if their lives depended on it, that Trowa realized he had, all things considered, been an asshole.

He took them to the corner bar and bought them a round, forcing himself to apologize and hating himself when they immediately brightened and relaxed. He didn't like knowing how much he had affected them, how much they wanted his good opinion.

It was after his third beer, when the two apprentices had thankfully moved to a table and were chatting up a pair of mildly interested women, that Trowa's phone hummed.

He won't.

Trowa stared at the message and told himself the queasy feeling in his stomach was because the leftover pizza he had had for lunch had perhaps been a few days too old.

What a surgical way to tell Trowa to fuck off, without actually having to say it. Probably Heero's misplaced talk with Duo about not breaking Trowa's heart had kept him from saying that outright.

He put the phone down on the bar.

Four dates. Five dates. It hadn't worked out.

Trowa supposed this happened all of the time, for people who dated. It was probably normal.

You ran into someone who knew what the monster looked like under the mask you showed the world. You had coffee with that someone and felt like an idiot. You let that someone drag you on a terrible date and you got to see just how good a job they had done at making their own mask to hide their monster. And then you did a lot of kissing and actually enjoyed spending time with them, and then- then they told you to fuck off.

He was sure Cathy had complained about this. Sure the people he worked with had too.

This-

The phone hummed again, and Trowa almost dropped it in his eagerness to pick it up.

What's your subway critic got you reading these days?

Trowa took another sip of his beer before responding, telling himself that he wasn't feeling relief, or giddiness, or anything approaching that. Three beers after a long day of work meant he was a little buzzed. Nothing more.

I haven't seen her again. I picked up Ogg's anthology yesterday.

He sat at the bar, phone in one hand and beer in the other, and waited for Duo to message him back.

An hour later, Duo still hadn't sent him anything else, and the apprentices walked out with smirks on their faces and giggling women holding their hands.

The next day was, thankfully, a Saturday.

Trowa went to the park to listen to the jazz trio in the morning, hoping Diana didn't make too huge of a mess in his absence and, when he returned, discovered that she had, in fact, made quite a large mess. She didn't seem to care that he needed to wear socks more than she needed to eat them. Nor did she care much for toilet paper staying on a roll or her food staying in its bowl.

He couldn't even begin to be upset with her, especially not when she stood on her hind legs and begged for his attention the moment he walked in the door.

Trowa spent the day cleaning and tinkering, resolutely leaving his phone in the bedroom and telling himself, far more than once, that it didn't matter whether or not he and Duo talked again.

On Monday, during his lunch break, Trowa thought about messaging him.

Riding the train home, he did.

How are your exams going?

It was after midnight, and Trowa was lying in bed reading, when Duo finally responded.

Soul sucking. I feel like the OZ interrogations were more gentle than this shit. Actually, I'm pretty sure the Comprehensive Exam was designed by some OZ Intelligence Officer.

Duo had complained, that day at the park, about having to juggle studying for the exams in the three classes he was enrolled in, writing papers for each, and preparing for his Comprehensive Exam that would be held only a week after the completion of his other exams. Trowa hadn't had a clue what he was talking about, and Duo had explained in excruciating detail that the Comprehensive Exam was something he had to pass in order to be admitted into the PhD program. If he failed it, then he might as well go see if Une would offer him a job, because his life would be over.

Your last exam is on Wednesday?

Yep. And then I get to bury myself in flash cards and notebooks for a week before I crash and burn. Hey, you think Une would let me do R&D or would she stick me back in the field?

I think Une would do anything possible to limit your access to any sort of weapons.

Yeah, but what if it's a weapon I design?

She'd stick you in customs.

Customs? Me?

Trowa could practically hear Duo's horror at the very idea.

You'd know how to stop smugglers.

You mean I'd know which ones to let get away with it.

That had pretty much been Une's assumption. Even though she had offered Duo a position within Preventers, she hadn't trusted him in the least. It had always been Trowa's understanding that Une would have buried him in paperwork and handcuffed him to a desk.

At least now you know what your other career options are.

Ha. I actually feel like that gave me the motivation to stay up all night studying. No way in hell I'm going to look at shipping containers for the rest of my life.

Happy to help.

What are you even doing awake? It's almost one - don't you have stuff to build in the morning?

OK, Cathy.

Ouch. Get some sleep.

Good luck with your exams.

Tuesday afternoon, Duo messaged him.

Okay, if I end up having to work for Une will you come with me?

Trowa wasn't if that meant Duo's exams had gone so horribly that he was now giving serious thought to working for Preventers, or if they had gone well enough that he could start to joke about it.

He hesitated before replying. Duo had neatly evaded his first invitation to meet up. Or, perhaps Trowa had been too subtle. Perhaps he should revert to more familiar tactics.

Meet me for dinner and we can discuss what a terrible idea that would be.

Tomorrow morning I've got my last exam. I don't think I've slept in three days. I'd be shit company.

Trowa was in the process of sending Duo a message about how much he wasn't bothered by the prospect of not having a deep philosophical debate, when Duo sent another message.

I have some more work to do at the library, and then I'm just going to go home and crash.

Trowa carefully deleted everything he had been about to say.

Probably a good idea.

Trowa put his phone away and forced himself to go back to work. There were things that needed his attention, and Duo Maxwell was clearly not one of them.

On Wednesday, Harlan told Trowa to get his head out of his ass, muttered that he was a fucking idiot, and threatened to have one of the apprentices do his job because someone needed to.

It wasn't until Trowa sat down on the stoop outside of Duo's apartment that he considered just what a bad idea it was.

Stalking was the word Trowa thought applied to his behavior.

He was pretty sure this wasn't something people normally did when dating.

Then again, if those pre-colonial films they played late at night were any indication, this was exactly what Trowa should be doing.

Duo, he was fairly certain, would have no problem telling Trowa to fuck off in person. And if he'd wanted him to stay away, wouldn't he have just said that? Wouldn't he have just stopped messaging Trowa? Stopped responding to Trowa's messages?

He'd been sitting on the stoop for an hour when he realized that there was a good chance Duo was already in his apartment.

Did you survive?

Duo's response was almost immediate.

Just fucking barely. Tro, remind me to never, ever, ever take a class with Avery again.

Trowa winced at the realization that Duo's last exam had been for the class he and Avery shared. That had to have been painful, after all of the stress Duo had been feeling.

We could just kill him. Save you from another class with him and save the world from his idea of theatre.

Now you're talking. Think Heero would help us hide the body?

If you told him how Avery glorified Zechs in that 'play' and treated Relena like shit, I'm pretty sure he'd kill Avery for you.

Nah. No more killing, remember? But he'd probably hack into Avery's computer and phone and leave some imaginative threats.

Trowa briefly enjoyed picturing Avery's face pale and drawn in terror as he realized that Heero Yuy was after him.

Tro, we should talk.

Even though he had never really dated, Trowa had been on enough first dates to know exactly what those words meant.

OK.

You wanna grab coffee or a drink or… something?

Trowa considered those equally unappealing options.

Whatever Duo was going to say to him, Trowa was fairly certain he didn't want to hear it in public.

I can be at your place in five minutes?

It wasn't entirely a lie. Just a contorted omission.

Okay. I'm just leaving the library now. Give me twenty?

Sure.

It was twenty minutes that passed with agonizing slowness. Trowa almost wished he hadn't stopped by his own apartment after work to drop off Diana.

A couple that lived in Duo's building left, giving him curious looks as they passed. It only reinforced Trowa's conclusion that this was not a normal thing to be doing.

He should just leave.

Duo wanted to end whatever this was. And Duo was stubborn. It wasn't like what Trowa wanted even mattered.

He should just leave.

Except that would mean not seeing Duo.

He'd already gone ten years without seeing Duo. He had survived it just fine.

He-

"Hey."

Trowa looked up to see Duo approaching.

"You look like shit."

He had noticed that Duo almost always had shadows under his eyes, but today they weren't faint smudges. Today, they nearly looked like bruises. Duo's eyes were also bloodshot, and his hair was pulled back in a haphazard tail.

"Jeez, Tro, lay off the romancing, will you?"

In retrospect, it hadn't been the best thing to say.

Duo sighed and sat down on the stoop beside Trowa, close enough that their legs touched, and leaned his elbows on the step behind him.

"I feel like shit," he muttered.

"Do you think you passed your exams?" Trowa wasn't sure if avoiding whatever talk Duo wanted to have was a good or bad thing.

"Yeah. Pretty sure. It was just… a lot. Last year was rough, but these… expectations just keep getting higher, you know? And then there's the fucking Comp Exam…" Duo trailed off with a groan, throwing his head back.

Trowa looked at the long line of his pale throat.

He had kissed Duo's jaw, after the cooking class. Had trailed his lips down the surprisingly sensitive skin of Duo's throat and nipped and placed a kiss on the hollow above his clavicle. Duo had laughed, a breathless sound that made Trowa think of nothing but sex.

"You'll do well," Trowa assured him.

"I'd fucking better." Duo sat back up and looked at Trowa. He sighed.

Trowa arched an eyebrow.

"I love it when guys sigh at me like that."

"I told you Avery was the first guy I'd ever dated, ever fucked."

Trowa nodded cautiously.

"He knew who I was - he knew I was the Duo Maxwell from the start. It's actually why he was even interested in me, yanno? And after him… they all knew I was the kid who did really awful shit. That's what they wanted, that guy."

"Duo, I was there. I know you're the Duo Maxwell."

The man beside him made a frustrated sound and ran a hand through his hair, further upsetting it.

"Right. But I'm- I mean, what's the point of this, Trowa? You're not getting your rocks off by getting it on with a former terrorist. You're just… What do you want from me?"

This was not at all the conversation Trowa thought they would be having.

"What do you want?" Trowa reverted to his training. Keep the target talking. Let them reveal their weaknesses.

Duo snoted.

"I want a lot of things, none of which I'm going to get. That's not the point. What-"

"Am I one of those things?"

"Well, Trowa, you're a person, not a thing."

Trowa tried to hold his gaze, but Duo looked away.

"Do you want me?"

"Of course I want you, Trowa. For fuck's sake, I've got eyes and nerve endings, don't I?"

The grudging admission was, Trowa had to think, one of the nicest things Duo had ever said to him.

"But?"

"You're really going to make me say it, aren't you?"

Considering that Trowa had no idea what Duo wasn't saying, he definitely was.

He stared him down, and eventually, Duo sighed.

"Look, Avery's a dick, but I can handle it. I can handle him. For the most part. He fucked me over, and it's… it's whatever. The other guys - they got their fill, and they moved on. But you... "

"What did Heero say to you?" Trowa had been tempted to just call up Heero and ask him.

Duo was again unable to meet his gaze.

"You've had shitty breakups, right?"

Trowa snorted.

"No."

"No? What, everything's been amicable and… see you around, still send birthday cards to each other and shit?"

"Duo, I've never dated anyone."

Now Duo was meeting his gaze, eyes wide and mouth unflatteringly agape.

"Ever?"

"Well, there was you."

"Was?"

"You're ending things, aren't you?"

"I- You've never dated? You don't- you… Trowa, you don't kiss like it's new."

"I've never dated. I didn't say I'd never been with someone." He forced himself to shrug. "One date is usually enough. For me. For them."

"Wow. Didn't realize I was supposed to invite you in for a fuck that first-"

"That's not what I'm saying," Trowa cut him off, seeing that Duo was deliberating taking it the wrong way.

Duo glared at him for a moment, and Trowa glared back.

"So you've never dated, and I've only ever dated assholes who screw me over. No wonder Heero thought we were fucked."

And now, at last, Trowa understood what this was all about.

Duo hadn't wanted to like him. Duo was used to getting screwed over.

How many times had Trowa screwed Duo over already?

"Duo, I promise you, I am never going to take your past and turn it into a dumpster fire and make people pay to watch it."

Duo's lips twitched, but he almost immediately turned somber again.

"You're pretty good at ferreting out weaknesses and using them to your advantage," he said carefully.

Trowa had to agree with that.

"You aren't unskilled at that either."

Duo snorted.

"Yeah, Heero pointed that out."

Duo scrubbed his face with his hands, and then propped his chin up and looked at Trowa again.

Trowa wondered if he should promise not to hurt Duo.

He fought with Cathy, occasionally, when she became too overbearing or her visits became too long or she said things that were too incisive. Duo was right, Trowa was good at exploiting the weaknesses he uncovered in others. He had made Cathy cry, more than once, had said things to her that later made him feel sick.

He could do that to Duo. He already knew what to do, what to say, after having seen Duo's interactions with Avery. He could hurt Duo so very easily.

He doubted it was a promise he would be able to keep, or one that Duo would even believe.

"I'm not interested in you because you're the Duo Maxwell."

Duo arched an eyebrow at that.

"It'd be easier, if you didn't know who I was. If I didn't know who you were," Trowa continued. "But it would be harder, too."

"Yeah," Duo gave a dark laugh. "Amen to that. You get it - but you also know too much."

"Maybe I'll have an amnesiac relapse?"

"Is that a thing?"

"I hope not."

Duo nodded.

"Me too. It'd be awkward as hell to wake up beside you and you have no idea who the naked guy in bed with you was."

Trowa arched an eyebrow.

"How did we get from you ending this to us being naked in bed together?"

Duo's cheeks flushed, and Trowa had to smirk at the look.

"Trowa-"

"I'm not going to use you, Duo. For whatever they did."

Duo swallowed hard and he looked momentarily fragile, more exposed than Trowa had ever seen him.

It passed, Duo straightening his shoulders and his eyes shuttering so quickly Trowa wondered if he had imagined it.

"So you… want to keep doing this?" Duo asked hesitantly.

Trowa shrugged.

"Maybe less of the avoiding me because Heero freaked you out parts. More of the waking up naked in bed parts instead."

Duo rolled his eyes, but his lips curved upwards.

"We haven't had any of those parts, yet."

"I know." Trowa heaved a theatrically tragic sigh.

Duo snorted a laugh and then moved closer, shifting upright and nudging his nose against Trowa's.

"Is this another one of your nudge for a kiss things?" Trowa asked, his voice not nearly as controlled as he wanted it to be.

Duo smirked.

"Yeah. You mind?"

"No."

Duo closed the space between them, his breath teasing against Trowa's mouth.

And then his lips were there, firm and smooth and teasing.

Trowa reached for him, cradling Duo's head in his hands, tangling his fingers in Duo's hair while he kissed the other man.

Duo shifted even closer, practically into Trowa's lap.

Duo nipped at his lower lip, and Trowa groaned. He could feel Duo's lips curve into a smirk against his own.

Trowa felt one of Duo's hands tease at the hair on his nape, felt the other slide over his shoulders. He shivered at the touch, at the heat and wiry strength of Duo.

When Duo finally pulled away, nose brushing against Trowa's again and his lips dragging across Trowa's cheek as he sat up, Trowa was fairly certain he had never seen Duo look so at ease.

His eyes were a little glazed, cheeks flushed and swollen lips a sinuous, sated curve.

He didn't pull his hands away, and Trowa allowed himself to enjoy the feeling of being pressed so closely together.

"More of these parts too," he said.

Duo chuckled.

"Yeah. I think we could do with a lot more of these parts."

-o-