Amy stopped on the second floor landing to put her skirt on over the borrowed shorts and to pull on at least one of her cardigans. She sat down on the stairs and started to lace up her shoes, but her hands wouldn't finish the motion. She just sat there, frozen, one shoe on her foot and one in her hand.

It was amazing that she could tell from a baboon's MRI, but no clue about whether she herself was about to cry. And she was in her own brain. It didn't seem fair. Of course, the brain had so little to do with some things. Sheldon had taught her that, even if he had never learned it himself. The amount of things you could feel, in your gut and in your heart and on your lips. Who would have thought?

I'm not going to cry, she decided. She put on her other shoe, slung her bag over her shoulder and went down the stairs. Outside it was cold, cloudy and eerily quiet, everyone sleeping off the excesses of the night. She might have been the only person alive in greater LA. It was a new year. She had almost forgotten.

She started across the street to her car. New year, new start? Did I just break up with Sheldon?

Amy stopped right in the middle of the road, the words sinking in. Broken up. Single. Alone. She nearly turned around then. She could, she knew. She could go back up the stairs and let Sheldon make her a cup of tea and spend all day with him, talking about all the things that no one else ever cared about. They would trade looks and smiles and bad puns, and never mention what had happened, or hadn't happened, and she would go home alone.

"No," she said aloud, and got into her car. I just broke up with Sheldon.

It was an experience, Amy told herself. She wanted to know everything. She wanted to do everything, all the things she had never done. This, too, was a thing to have done. Now she knew what breaking up felt like. Somehow, that made her feel no better. It was possible she was going to cry after all. Where was the portable electroencephalogram when she needed it?

Someone knocked on the car window and Amy jumped. It was Howard, grinning hugely, Bernadette peering over his shoulder.

What on earth? Amy rolled down the window.

"How's it going? Get through the night ok?" he asked brightly, and then he winced. Bernadette's smile grew wider and even cuter. "Or, nevermind. Anyway, I wanted to catch you - how much do you know about rat brains?"

"I know everything about rat brains," Amy said. Well, everything anyone knew about rat brains. Brains could be really weird, even the tiny little ones.

"That's what I thought. There's a project we're working on with brain-computer links for a grant proposal, and we could use a neurobiologist," Howard said. "How about it? Come by sometime to check it out? See if you're interested? I'm in charge of hiring."

"You want to work with me?" Amy knew these sort of things happened, but not to her. She had never gotten a job by…knowing people. Other people knew people. Other people had contacts, called in favors, did networking. Amy just had awkward interviews - and a very impressive CV.

"It's a great project," Howard said defensively. "Even if most of us engineers don't have Ph.D's."

Oops. Had she insulted him? "No, no, I didn't mean that. I'll stop by. And check it out."

"Ok. Great." Howard still looked at her a little suspiciously. "How about this evening?"

"Sure. I'll be there," she said.

"Howie, I'll catch up with you," Bernadette said sweetly. Howard took the hint and left with a shrug. Bernadette practically stuck her head into the car. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Well, last night! Anything you want to talk about?" Bernadette's eyes were wide and bright behind her glasses.

Amy plastered on a smile. "I read a book about trains." She wasn't ready to talk about it, not yet. Maybe she would start with Penny. Penny was her bestie, and Penny would come with alcohol.

Bernadette hesitated, but whatever she wanted to say, she kept it to herself. "Ok. If you say so. Happy new year, Amy." She waved and smiled as she turned and followed Howard, cute as a mushroom, but Amy wouldn't have wanted to meet her in a dark alley just then.

At least she had something to look forward to, Amy thought as she watched the couple walk to their car. Some reason not to sit home all day, just being miserable.

For one thing, most rats were far more affectionate than Sheldon.