„So you think he´s going to use his knowledge of the biochemical weapons to start a new war? " Mac asked Price, who had stormed like a wild animal, into his room.

"What else could he do? Roach said he disappeared. Isn´t it strange that he appears right now?" Price explained and sat down on the chair in front of the General´s desk.

"He´s in Russia right? Then it´s none of our business." Mac answered and took a seat opposite of Price.

"None of our business? That´s ridiculous Arthur. He could cause a new war and you tell me to sit here with the knowledge of it and don´t give a fuck?" Price yelled in anger, staring at his friend. Mac just shook his head and started to open some files, which were laying on his desk.

"Didn´t we have enough trouble the last time? I´m sure if he is a risk for the world the Government in Russia watches him. He´s out of our field of activity." Mac said and wrote something down in the files he was studying.

"Fuck it Mac. Did the Government recognize that Vladimir Makarov was a risk? Did they watch his actions? No, they didn´t give a shit. Why should it be different now?" Price yelled again but Mac didn´t answer and just kept on writing.

Price sat there, looking uncomprehend at his friend for a few minutes and then left the room, cursing. He couldn´t believe why Mac was so indifferent on the information he gave him. This Vitaly could be a greater danger then his brother was and that was the biggest fear Price had right now. Makarov himself was a bad ass no one could even imagine, a monster send straight from hell to punish humanity. Price swore to himself that he would never let a single man gain such terrible power and destroy the lives of innocent people.

Depressed Price entered the conference room again and slipped down on a chair. He looked around and recognized the rest of the men were gone. Headshaking he took a cigar out of his pocket, lighted it and read over the piece of paper Roach had laid down on the table. He read that this Vitaly had worked for the US Government for about five years, without any sign of violent acts. His co-workers described him as a very friendly, solid and helpful man, who never minded to help others in their work. He also had a wife and a son, who still lived in the USA. No one did know why he disappeared suddenly; his wife only remembered he watched a report about his brother the last time she saw him.

Unsatisfied Price laid the piece of paper aside and took a deep drag from his cigar; watching the smoke floating through the room, till it disappeared. He sighted heavily and closed his eyes. Since when was Mac so strict and stubborn in giving orders and followed the record without balancing the pros and cons that they included. He wondered if Mac got so serious about everything since he was a General. Years ago as he was just a Captain he often ignored orders if it was for the sake of humanity. Back then Price couldn´t understand why he did this but as he himself got a Captain he knew that Mac did it not only to satisfy himself; he did it for the people he wanted to protect. Price opened his eyes again, put his half smoked cigar into the ashtray and decided to leave the room; he needed to talk to Soap and get to know what he was thinking about all that.


Trolling through the corridors of the base Price took a look in every single room to find his friend. Most of the rooms were empty, only in the recreation room he found Worm and Archer playing some sort of card game. Price stepped up to them and watched them play a while, before he asked them if they had seen their Captain. Shortly Archer only told him he saw him not long ago heading to the infirmary. Price thanked the Soldier, turned on his heel and hurried to the infirmary. As he opened the door, he could already hear Soap´s voice; the last week his voice had got something of its distinctive strength back. Price followed the voice and stepped into the doctor`s room.

"So you need some medicine to sleep?" The doctor asked with one eye-brow raised.

"I told you already. Why is this such a big deal?" Soap answered somehow stressed and crossed his arms.

"You as the Captain should know that I can´t give you medicine without any good reason. If you tell me why you need them I may change my opinion." The doctor replied with a smile.

"What do you think why I need them? I can´t sleep."

"That´s not a good reason. I need to know what keeps you awake. Is it ´cause you can´t get your mind free, are you too stressed, do you have nightmares?" The doctor said calmly and stared at Soap, waiting for him to give him a clear answer. Soap returned his stare for a while, made an annoyed sound and shook his head.

"It´s kind of a mix. I lay down to sleep and always think about what´s going to happen next and when I´m finally asleep I have nightmares." Soap finally stated.

"What are your nightmares about?" The doctor kept on asking and wrote something down on a piece of paper.

"Does this really matter?" Soap whispered; he wasn´t in the mood to tell the doctor what his dreams were about.

"Sometimes it helps to talk about the things that stress us. Maybe you should go and talk to the psychologist, she could help you if you have something that burdens you."

"Before I go and talk to any psychologist again, I prefer to have nightmares. They always talk shit about hidden feelings and fears I have. I exactly knew my own fears and feelings. I don´t need someone who explains me how to live with them." Soap answered, anger swinging in his voice.

"If you´re aware of your fears and feelings then you can tell me what your nightmares are about. I don´t want to hear any details, just tell me the main problem of your dreams." The doctor said and kept on writing down. Soap inhaled sharply, hold his breath back for a few seconds and exhaled deeply.

"I dream about Natasha and her way to torture me." Soap said and looked down to the floor, unable to look in the eyes of the medic.

"Well I see. I give you some pills but don´t take more than one, if you can´t sleep after one we need to find another way to get you rested." The doctor finally said, stood up from his chair and walked over to his medicine cabinet, taking a small white box out.

He checked the content in the box and handed it over to MacTavish, who took it with a nod and turned around, facing Price. The young Captain stared at him in surprise, how long has he stood there? Has he overheard their conversation? Why didn´t he noticed Price stood behind him? Really pissed Soap glared at Price and squeezed himself out of the door, pushing Price hardly out of the way. The older Captain looked at Soap with a mix of pity and astonishment; one brow arched and his lips puckered. Soap recognized the stare he shot him, shook his head angry and mumbled something as he walked to the exit. He needed a smoke right now.


Opening the back door, which led outside he put the small box into his chest pocket and pulled a box of cigarettes out of his pants. He let the door shot with a clunk, pulled his lighter out and lit the cigarette, which rested between his lips. He took a deep drag and his eyes swept over the area around him. The snow still covered the whole ground and Soap knew it wouldn´t melt any time soon. He took another drag and started to shiver; it was definitely too cold to go outside, dressed like he was. But Soap didn´t mind the coldness that surrounded his body, it made him at least feel. Since Natasha had played her game with him the only thing he could really feel was desperation. Sure he laughed, made his jokes and tried to forget what she did to him; but deep inside he was a broken soul, which wished to find salvation.

Hearing the door behind him get opened he turned his head only to see that Price had followed him. Soap bristled with anger; couldn´t he be on his own at least for a good smoke. He watched Price step up to him and turned his gaze back to the snow covered ground. Hadn´t Price heard enough? Was he here to give him the friendly advice to listen to the doctor and go and talk to the psychologist? Or was he here to satisfy his own curiosity about Soap´s messed up feelings? Didn´t he know enough already? He had seen the tapes from his capture; he had seen what Natasha did to him and Soap didn´t want to re-live the events with his friend. It was enough for him to re-live it in his dreams. Leering to Price, who was standing next to him Soap began to open his mouth to speak.

"What do you want Price? Haven´t you heard enough?" He said angrily and kept his eyes on his friend.

"I´m not here to talk about your mental state if it's that what you think. I just wanted to tell you that Mac says we´re not going after Vitaly Makarov." Price said staring into the air.

"That doesn´t surprise me." Soap answered shortly, eyes still on his friend.

"So what do you think about all this? Should we really don´t give a shit about him?" Price kept on asking.

"I don´t know but Mac´s our General. We have to follow his orders. It doesn´t matter what we think about his decision." Soap answered and flipped his cigarette on the ground, ready to go back inside.

"That´s all you have to say? You know better than anyone else that we must do something to stop this madness. What if he starts a new war? What if he kills thousands of innocent people? Could you live with that? Could you displace the fact that we could have stopped him?" Price yelled frightened of Soap´s reaction. Since when did Soap follow such ridiculous orders?

The young Captain stood in front of the door, he had just opened and didn´t move. He could understand Price´s point of view. He understood why he wanted to stop Vitaly before he did something terrible. But Soap couldn´t support his friend's opinion; he hasn't got the strength to keep up with a new fight. He couldn´t allow himself to get hurt anymore; he wouldn´t ignore orders anymore. It has caused too much pain to Soap´s soul the last time he tried to satisfy his own curiosity. Sure he was aware of the fact that thousands of innocent people could get killed but he decided it was time for him to be more selfish. Indeed the last time he acted selfish it caused him this pain he wanted to forget but this time it was different. This time he would get hurt if he didn´t think about himself. Heavy hearted Soap turned around one last time, giving Price a look of pain.

"I don´t care old man. I really don´t." Soap said shortly and went back inside, leaving an astonished Price behind, who couldn´t trust his ears.