I walked quietly up to my room, shedding my work clothes as I went. Why the hell would Viktor Nikiforov want to tutor me? I though to myself. I mean, yes, he was a genius, but he was also everything I wasn't; popular, lovable, not to mention incredibly smart. I wished I could be him.

And I was still not entirely sure that this wasn't just some sick joke.

My phone was something that I was forbidden to use while I was working, so it resided in my room until my shift was over. Sliding into my bed, I punched his number into my contacts. It felt odd; the only other people I had in there were my family and Phichit. I hadn't had to enter a new contact in a while.

Mentally, I was unprepared to text Viktor. Physically… even less so.

My mind went over the note once again. I tried to figure out if there was any clue to his intentions through his words, but they seemed real enough. I pulled the note out, smoothing out the crinkled corners and scrunching my brows together in concentration.

Dear Yuuri,

I was going through your class' List yesterday and noticed you were at the bottom. I believe that you are better than that. Last year, I was TAing in your french class and saw your Final essay; it was flawless, so I made a decision.

Yuuri, I want you to realize your true worth and what an excellent scholar you truly are. If you wish, I would be more than happy to tutor you; free of charge.

Take me up on this offer or don't; either way, here's my number to contact me:

[Viktor's #]

Xoxo! Viktor

PS: Also, even if you don't want a tutor… call me!

I still didn't understand that last part; why would he still want me to call him? However, I placed the note in my pocket and continued to mull it over in my brain.

No matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise, I knew in my heart that this wouldn't turn out any way except badly. I wanted him to tutor me, but I couldn't entirely follow his thinking here.

What would he gain from teaching me?? I asked myself, throwing my body back on my bed and splaying my limbs outward. Thinking about everything Viktor's friends would say and do, not to mention him himself, made my heartbeat speed up, and I could feel my breathing start to falter.

My brain ran at a million miles a second, telling me everything that would happen if I texted or, god forbid, CALLED Viktor. I clenched my fingers around my ears, feeling my eyes grow wide as I tried to change focus. My train of though was broken though. I could only think of what a failure I would be and how they would make fun of me.

"No… not again…" I muttered, feeling my anxiety build up. I started to cry, my brain physically hurting and my fingers clenching around my ears like a lifeline.

"Yuuri?" came a voice outside of the door. Mari, my sister, knocked again.

"Yuuri, are you alright?" Then the knocking became more urgent as she slowly realized what was going on.

"Yuuri!!! Please unlock the door!" I could barely hear her, the voices in my head only getting louder.

They're just gonna make fun of you.

Viktor was just pretending.

You are still going to fail like the dumbass that you are.

I lost myself, my thoughts becoming jumbled and my headache worsening. Mari kept trying to unlock the door, but eventually, she stopped, shifting tactics. I heard her voice through the door, calmer this time, but I could tell that it was forced.

Slowly, I could start to hear what she was saying.

"Yuuri… breath with me…" I focused on her slow, exaggerated breathing, trying desperately to match it. Finally, my breathing slowed, and I closed my eyes, the panic slowly ebbing until it was gone completely.

I slid off my bed, my legs still slightly wobbly from the aftermaths of my panic attack. Unlocking the door, I braced myself for Mari's scolding.

"YUURI, I TOLD YOU TO NEVER LOCK THE DOOR TO YOUR ROOM." She spoke in a motherly fashion, bossing me around like the older sister that she was. I wasn't in any position to argue; she had had a point. If I was alone in my room and had a panic attack like this one and she couldn't get to me, I was screwed. I made a mental note to remove the lock on my door.

"Okay… *sigh* Yuuri, what spurred this on?" She cocked her head at me, her brown eyes full of curiosity. I was reluctant to tell her, but I pulled the note from my pocket and explained the day's events. As I was explaining, an inadvertent smile grew on Mari's face. By the time I was finished with my tale, Mari was full-on smirking at me.

"What?" I asked her, annoyed at her expression.

"Dude… he just gave you his number."

"So? He wants to tutor me," I said, confused. She rolled her eyes at me, starting again.

"He is SOOOOO totally interested in you."

"Yeah… in my Finals grades," I deadpanned, glaring at her.

"No, I mean… 'Even if you dong want me to tutor you' or whatever, 'still call me?'?! This dude is so into you!!" She laughed, bending over at the waist. I laughed as well, but it was for a completely different reason.

"Mari, he's a GUY. Plus, just because he wants me to call him doesn't mean he automatically likes me. You're ridiculous," I said, shoving past her and down the stairs. Viktor could never be interested in me. All the girls he'd dated had been part of the popular cheerleader group. Never a nobody like me. It could never happen. Plus, there was the obvious fact that Viktor wasn't interested in guys.

Looking back on it, however…

Maybe that wasn't entirely true.