AN: Sorry it's been so long between updates - I went on holiday. Next couple of chapters are nearly finished though so I will be updating soon. Thank you so much to my gorgeous reviewers! Hope you enjoy!


Chapter Eight:

Bella's POV

The weekend passed fairly slowly. I spent Saturday doing some chores around the house, then slipped to the mall to pick up a few more things that I needed in the apartment. My home was starting to look a bit more like my own now, and it felt cosy. My bookshelves were filling with the books I brought home from work, and I spent a large part of Saturday afternoon putting up pictures on the walls. The landlord also dropped by with a workman to check that the gas fire in the fireplace was up and running okay.

"You won't need it just yet," my landlord said, rubbing his vast stomach. "But you'll need it in a month or so – gets pretty chilly up here. Even with the central heating, it's nice to have a fire going as well."

I had leftover stew for dinner and was just settling into bed with another book when the doorbell rang. Aware that my pyjamas showed rather more skin than I would care for a neighbour to see, I slipped on my dressing gown and went to open the door.

Jacob stood in the doorway, looking wretched.

"Oh my god, Jake! What the hell happened to you?"

He was wearing a dark suit, but it looked ruffled and distinctly careworn. He was pale under his naturally dark skin and his hair was sticking up all over the place.

He groaned and walked into the apartment, collapsing onto the sofa and burying his face into his hands. "You will never believe the day I have just had," he moaned through his fingers.

"Wasn't it Laura's grandfather's funeral today?" I asked, flicking on the kettle then sitting next to him and rubbing his back soothingl. His suit was drenched from the rain. "Jake you're soaking!"

"Raining," he mumbled as way of an excuse.

"You've got to get out of those wet things before you catch a cold. I've got some of Charlie's old t-shirts lying around." I got off the sofa to find him some dry clothes. He hadn't moved an inch when I got back. I was starting to seriously worry. I knelt in front of him and pulled his fingers away from his face. "Jacob Black, you are starting to really scare me." I said.

"Oh Bella," he sighed, sitting up a bit straighter and looking down at me. "I fucked up really bad."

"What did you do?" I couldn't imagine him doing anything so bad it warranted this kind of reaction.

He shook his head sadly. "It was the breakfast," he explained, although I had no idea what he was talking about. "We stopped at this run-down looking café, and the breakfast was dodgy. I felt sick from the moment we arrived at her house, but I thought it was just nerves. I really didn't want to be there, see. Anyway, we drove down to the chapel and it was just getting worse and worse. My stomach was making all kinds of weird noises.

"They just brought in the coffin and I knew I had to get out of there or I wouldn't make it."

I stared at him, half bemused, half disgusted. "What happened?" I whispered.

He hung his head. "I didn't make it. Spewed all over the great aunts in the back row."

I looked at him, shocked for a minute before, without meaning to, I laughed. I clapped my hand over my mouth, but I couldn't help it. I was laughing so hard my sides were sore. Jacob just stared at me as though I'd gone mad.

"Oh my god, Jake!" I gasped. "That's one way to break up with a girl." I collapsed into giggles again.

"Bella, it's not funny! Didn't you understand?"

"What did they do?"

"They had to stop the whole service!" Jacob wailed. "The aunts were hysterical, Laura was absolutely livid – man I've never seen anyone so mad. She told me piss off home. Well, I didn't need telling twice."

I shook my head, finally getting control of myself, wiping the tears from my eyes. "Oh Jacob," I sighed. "How are you feeling now?"

He shrugged. "Fine. Just mortified. I want to crawl under a rock and die."

I grabbed his hands in mine. "Come on, let's get you into some dry clothes and then I'll make you a cup of tea."

He looked up, and his chocolate brown eyes met mine. For a second our eyes locked together and I felt my hear rate quicken. A deep blush rose up my face and I quickly looked away, handing him the dry clothes. "Go get dressed in my room," I instructed then went to the kitchen and busied myself with making tea.

Jacob emerged a minute later, wearing Charlie's clothes – they were both too baggy yet too short for him and he looked very silly. "I hope you don't mind," he began. "I used some of your toothpaste to clean my mouth."

I handed him a cup of tea and we both sat on the sofa. I turned to face him, drawing my legs up under me as I blew on the hot cup of tea to cool it.

"Jacob," I began slowly, not sure what I was doing. "I'm not complaining or anything, but why did you come here? I mean, why didn't you just go straight home once you got back to Seattle?"

He shrugged and wouldn't meet my eyes. "I just had to see you," he said in way of an explanation. "I don't know, Bella. All day, I just wanted you there with me. Or better yet, I wanted to be away from that place and just be with you instead."

I prodded him lightly with my toe and joked, "so you could spew on me instead?"

He smiled weakly. "Ever since you've been back, Bella, I just can't keep my mind off you." My heart began to race and I felt the muscles in my lower abdomen tighten excitedly. Without realising it, I leaned forwards toward him, eager to hear more. He opened his mouth to keep speaking but a knock on the door interrupted him.

We both looked at each other confused for a second, then Jacob froze in place, sniffing the air. "Holy crap," he whispered.

Quickly, I put my mug down on the coffee table, then hurried over to the door and looked through the small peep- hole. Through the distorted glass, I could see a spiky black head. With a gasp, I pulled the door open.

Alice stood in the doorway, beaming at me. In her hands, she held a small pot plant with a big floppy bow tied around it.

"Oh, Alice!" I exclaimed throwing my arms around her. She hugged me gently then stepped back, glaring over my shoulder.

"I didn't realise you had company," she said melodically and I turned to look at Jacob as well. He'd stood, and was staring stonily at my surprise guest.

"I was just leaving," he said coldly.

"No, Jacob! Don't go. You don't need to."

"I do," he said quietly. "I need to go home and get changed anyway. Bye Bella."

He brushed past me and before I knew it, he was gone. Alice stood there beaming at me, and my disappointment at Jacob's sudden departure was masked by excitement at seeing her.

"Oh Alice, please come in!" I held the door wider open for her and she handed me the plant.

"Happy Housewarming, Bella!" she said the darted around the room looking at all the decorations and furnishings I had. "This place looks wonderful. Who knew you had such style?"

"This is such a great surprise, I didn't know you were in town."

"Well, I decided to make a special trip after I got your last email. I wanted to give you time to settle in and I wanted to surprise you."

"Well it's a wonderful surprise," I replied honestly. I put the pot plant on a small table by the front door, then sat on the sofa with Alice. As excited as I was having her here, I couldn't help but wish she'd arrived just 10 minutes later. What had Jacob been about to say to me?

"Listen Bella, I have actually come with ulterior motives, I'm afraid."

I raised my eyebrows and took a sip of my drink. "Oh really? And what would those be?"

She laughed. "Oh Bella, I love how you've changed." I didn't know what she meant but she continued before I could ask. "Part of the reason I've come to visit is because… Well, Edward is in the area."

I choked on my tea and she patted me gently on the back as I spluttered.

"He was wondering if you would be up for seeing him sometime."

"What?" I choked out weakly. That had been the last thing I was expecting. "Why does he want to see me?"

Alice half-shrugged and I was instantly suspicious. What had she seen?

"Listen, Bella, in some ways Edward sees your return to Washington as an act of forgiveness. It may seem irrational, but that's how he feels. Your 'coming home' is a symbol to him. He knows that he was the reason that you left, which is why he has given you time. But now that you're back he'd like to see you again. Talk to you about a few things."

"He wasn't the only reason I left," I muttered. "There were all sorts of reasons. I just needed to get away – I needed to figure out who I was by myself. And what do you mean 'he has given me time'?" I demanded crossly. "He hasn't given me anything thank you very much. He hasn't even been a factor in my life for the past four years."

She looked at me, her face unreadable. "I know you're still upset, Bella. You have every right to be. But you welcomed Jacob Black back quickly. Surely he was also one of the reasons you left?"

I glared at her. "Jacob is my friend, Alice."

She shrugged again. "Well maybe Edward could be too. Anyway, enough about this. Clearly you don't want to talk about Edward, and that's fine. He said to not push you and give you time to think." She smiled at me then. "So tell me all about your new job!"

I was still fuming at the way Alice had dropped this bombshell on me. The way she spoke, I felt as though everything I did was now on Edward's terms. I imagined myself in Dr Kopner's dark office. What would she say in this situation? "Take a deep breath. Let it out. Your anger is coming from the feeling of losing control. Control your anger, and you will control the situation." I closed my eyes.

"Bella, I'm sorry," Alice began. "If you're tired I can go."

My eyes flew open again. "No way!" I exclaimed. I haven't seen you in months, Alice! Please tell me you're staying for awhile."

ooo

Jacob's POV

I couldn't concentrate at work on Monday. I had stupidly told Chris about the disastrous events at the funeral and every time I looked at him he mimed projectile vomiting. I was in a foul mood.

Bella had tried to call twice yesterday, but I'd ignored her calls, knowing she was still with the vampire. As I'd left her apartment on Saturday evening, my hands had been shaking again and my body felt like it was on the edge. I took my temperature when I got home and it had been 101 degrees. One degree hotter than it normally was. I couldn't go back. I was starting to get better and I just couldn't go back to that old life. If Bella was around vampires again then so be it. I would be staying away. My supernatural days were behind me. She could do as she pleased.

The spanner I was using slipped in my hand and I winced as my palm scraped against a ragged piece of metal. Blood dripped from the cut and I watched it with satisfaction until Jack came over and smacked me around the head.

"What are you doing, you idiot," he mumbled, wrapping a towel around my hand. I was pleased to see the blood staining the white material – I hadn't regressed completely then.

I heaved a great sigh and wandered off to find the first aid kit. Once I'd patched myself up the best I could, I made my way back into the garage and stopped in my tracks, smiling at the two visitors standing in the doorway.

I hadn't seen Sam for nearly six months now, but there he stood. Clasping his hand and gazing around with big eyes, was Sam's four-year-old son, Maxim. I walked over to them and shook Sam's hand then kneeled down to Maxim's level.

"Hey buddy," I greeted him, ruffling his hair. "Want to go see some cool cars?"

He nodded shyly, still wide-eyed with excitement. I stood, then picked him up swiftly and dangled him upside down by his feet. He shrieked with laughter until I tossed him up over my head and onto my shoulders.

We walked around the garage, and I answered his many "What's that?"s with patience I didn't realise I had. Finally, I returned to Sam, pulling Maxim from my shoulders and setting him down on the floor.

"You're a natural," Sam observed.

I shrugged. "When's the second one due?"

Sam grinned. "Two weeks. Emily's huge."

"Any idea what you're having?"

"I have my fingers crossed for a girl," Sam said, ruffling his kid's hair and then sighing deeply. "You need to come home, Jacob."

I shot him a searching stare. "Why? What's wrong?" I was instantly worried about Billy – but I'd only spoken to him yesterday and he seemed fine.

"We miss you back on the reservation – it's not the same without you around."

I shrugged. "I'm making a life for myself here."

"I heard Bella's back," Sam said quietly.

"So?"

"Jacob – remember what happened to you after she left! You disappeared for months. You lost yourself in the wolf, and it took you a long time to recover. How can you just accept her back into your life now? After everything she did to you?"

"She didn't do anything, ok?" I replied, forgetting for a moment that I was angry with her. "She had to leave – she needed to get away from it all. Get away from the Cullens."

"You know they're back?"

My head snapped up. "All of them?" I asked.

"No, not all of them. The leader and his wife, the fortune-teller and her mate. And Edward."

My heat rate quickened and I felt my hands begin to shake. I closed my eyes, trying to regain control, hating myself for losing it. "So?" I said through clenched teeth.

"Stop wasting your time hiding up here, Jacob. You belong down in La Push with your brothers."

"We've had this argument before, Sam. I'm making a life for myself up here," I argued. "A life that I have chosen. A life that I want. I deserve that at least."

Sam didn't look happy. He clearly still thought that I had made the wrong choice by moving up here. But what was he thinking, that he could just come up here and talk me into going back with him?

"I'll come down and visit, Sam," I said quietly. "But I'm not moving back. I'm not joining the pack again. You can handle the Cullens without my help."

Sam shook his head sadly, but we had nothing left to say. I felt a twinge of remorse as he and his kid walked back down the driveway to their car. In some ways I had turned my back on my family. But just like Bella, I'd had to look after myself for a while.

With a sigh, I got back to work, glad to be able to distract myself with engines. After I had finished high school, Charlie had suggested that I go to college. Even though Bella had left and we'd lost contact, I used to go visit Charlie fairly regularly, worried that he'd get lonely in that house by himself. He also wasn't in on the big werewolf secret and it was nice being able to talk to someone who thought of me as a normal human kid. Billy would never have suggested college – he expected me to live in La Push my whole life, doing what was right for the tribe, marrying some girl on the reservation and having children before I was 20. Well, no thanks.

My grades were appalling – and I knew that I would be lucky if any college took me. So instead Charlie had suggested an apprenticeship. I'd always been handy with cars, so naturally, a motor mechanic was the best idea. Charlie helped set me up as an apprentice with Jack, who was an old fishing buddy of his from back in the day.

Sam was unhappy when I made the choice to move to Seattle and leave my werewolf life behind. He felt betrayed, I think, and I could kind of understand why. But Charlie supported me whole-heartedly and Billy came around in the end. We'd had a pretty heated argument before I left though.

"I thought you'd understand!" I'd yelled at him, my arms crossed against my chest as I stood fuming in the corner of our small living room. "You've been stuck in that wheelchair, trapped, unable to do so many things because of it. Well that's how I feel about life here – La Push has become my wheelchair – and I'm not going to put up with it anymore."

"Jacob, you're not thinking clearly. Sure, you want a job, but we can find one for you here. Or in Forks, maybe."

"No," I replied stubbornly. "I'm going to Seattle Dad. I can either go with your blessing or not but that part's up to you."

I sighed remembering that fight. He hadn't given me his blessing nor had he spoken to me for weeks afterwards. But Charlie had slowly worked away at him and I returned to La Push every weekend for the next few months to prove to him that I hadn't disappeared out of his life completely. Sam had come around too, accepting that not everyone had to be tied down by the pack. He was extremely interested in the improving symptoms as well, keeping records of my temperature and strength.

But now it looked as though they were both ready for me to come back – and I knew it was because of Bella.

"Hey Jacob," Jack called over the sound of the grinder, a few hours after Sam had left. I turned it off and flipped up my facemask to look at him.

"What?"

"You're popular today," he said with a grin, gesturing to the doorway. Think of the devil. Bella stood there, her arms folded across her chest, looking unhappy. I sighed and put the grinder down on the bench top then took off my safety mask. "You have appointments all day or you plannin' on actually getting some work done this afternoon?" he asked sarcastically, the grin still plastered across his old, craggy face.

I pulled a face at him, and walked slowly over to Bella, not liking the look of the expression she was wearing.

"Why aren't you at work?" I asked her in way of a greeting.

She shrugged, her eyes not leaving mine; she was glowering at me. "Early mark."

"Right. Well I'm still on the clock here so you better make this quick." I hadn't meant it to sound so unfriendly and I instantly regretted my tone.

"I will," she said through clenched teeth. "Can we speak about this outside?"

I nodded and we left the shop together, stopping once we reached the sidewalk. Then she turned and glared at me.

"How dare you!" she hissed.

I stepped back, surprised by the radiating anger I felt. "What?"

"How dare you just walk out on me last night? You said you wanted a normal human life Jacob, you said that! So what, you pick and choose the human traits that suit you, is that it?"

I stared at her wide-eyed: I had no idea she'd be so angry.

"You think," she continued, her voice growing louder. "You think that you can just come and go as you please? You think you can choose who my friends are and who aren't? You want to be human Jacob, so act like it! You're just as bad as Edward was – trying to control my life by deciding who I can and can't hang out with, and trying to emotionally manipulate me into choosing you over my other friends. Well I'm not standing for it!" She took a breath then kept right on going. "You decide now whether or not you want to be my friend – if you do then great, but you get all of me – not just the parts you want. All of me, got it?" She was glowering at me, her hands clenched into tight fists at her side.

I realised I was leaning away from her slightly, my mouth still hanging open a little.Bella has changed, I realised, impressed.

"I want you," I said quietly. "I want all of you."

She continued to glare at me, clearly unsure whether or not she was quite ready to forgive me so easily.

"It's a difficult habit to break, Bella." I said in way of an explanation. "And what you said about Edward – I don't want you to ever think of me like him, ok? I promise I won't manipulate you or control you or try to change you in any way. You're my best friend and you're perfect just as you are."

Finally, she nodded, and looked down at her hands. "When I left, Jacob, I knew that I had to be independent, that I had to figure out who I was and stand on my own two feet. I'm sorry I got so angry with you but the thought of anyone trying to take that away from me now…"

I stepped towards her and gathered her into my arms. "I had no right to treat you how I did today, Bella. I'm really sorry. I need to learn to distance myself from the werewolf that's still in me."

"Or you need to learn to accept it," she muttered, barely audibly.

"I have to get back to work," I sighed, not yet ready to release her from my hug. Burying my face in her hair I breathed in the scent of her shampoo and for a second rested my lips against her shiny locks. I wasn't sure whether or not she had felt the shadow of a kiss, but didn't really care. I didn't want to play games with her anymore. I just wanted her to be mine.

"I'll come over tonight," I said quietly.

"Alice is staying." Bella said.

"That's ok."

"How about I come to yours?" she asked, pulling back from me and looking up into my eyes. "It will save both of your noses from hurting. And it may be easier to keep up your end of the bargain if you don't have to have too much direct contact with the Cullens."


AN: Make me update sooner - leave a review! xxx Annie