Chapter 9 – The Fight
Raven finished her tea, washed her mug and left it upside down at the sink. She imagined Beast Boy and Terra should be in better terms already, and went to her bedroom. No matter what Beast Boy had said, she couldn't see those two breaking apart. He must had exaggerated when he said he had a lot of discussions with the blonde lately. They were… perfect for each other.
Going near the hallway that led to Terra's room, however, she sensed a lot of negative and messy emotions coming from there. And it didn't take long for some yelling come from there too. The first ones were Beast Boy's. She knew she shouldn't be listening; she should keep walking and let the couple work his problems out. But she couldn't move. She was shocked. Beast Boy was right. Both of them were really mad at each other, she could feel. Was it just because Beast Boy didn't want to go out with Terra? She could feel a particular emotion coming from Terra, but she couldn't figure out which was.
"Oh, really?" yelled Terra "So let's decide something about this discussion right now!"
A moment of silence. Raven couldn't understand why she was so curious, this wasn't her business, she should go away. But her body only bent a little, disobeying her, so she could hear well. Beast Boy muttered something.
"I don't want you to see Raven again"
Raven was released of her petrified state with the new shock. They were fighting… because of her? The empath cover her mouth with her hands and ran to her room, her heart racing. She went inside and closed the door quickly, leaning herself on the wall. She tried to calm her mind, but Terra's words kept coming back in her head. She put her hands on her ears, but it didn't work. She could still feel the disturbed emotions of her friends. All because of her. She couldn't think straight, and her bookcase started shaking causing some books to fall down.
Raven could not let this happen. So she went to the only place where her powers could not harm anyone. Nevermore.
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"What?" asked Beast Boy after some quiet seconds "What the hell are you talking about? What Raven has to do with anything?"
"Why don't you tell me, since you're such good friend with her?" asked Terra back, her voice still loud.
Beast Boy laughed without humor and gave his girlfriend an incredulous look.
"Really Terra?" he lowered his voice and try to calm down "Of all people, you're jealous of Raven?"
"I am not jealous" she also lowered her voice.
"Then why are you making this ridiculous demand?" asked the changeling, holding her shoulders.
"Because… You spend too much time with her" mumbled Terra looking down and pouting "And now you don't have time to take me out"
Beast Boy sighed.
"We've talked about this, Terra" he said, releasing her and putting his hands on his eyes, like he had a headache "I don't feel like going out. I mean, not every night, like we used to. And I wanted our relationship to grow, you know. It feels like nothing changed ever since we were fifteen"
"What do you want to change?" she asked confused "We were great at fifteen"
"Yeah, but we're almost twenty now… Don't you think we should have evolved a little?"
"I really don't think that. We're fine, it's a perfect relationship. We have fun, and there're no stupid charges…"
"I don't know Terra" he muttered, sitting at the end of the bed "I can't really see us married, you know? Every time I try, it feels wrong, since we're so childlike"
"What? Who's talking about marriage?" said Terra with an unpleasant expression "You really want us to go old too soon"
Beast Boy didn't answered, looking out of the window. He knew she wouldn't understand.
"Let's just drop this, okay?" she purred, hugging him from behind "Just do as I told you"
"Are you still talking about that Raven thing?"
"Yes. You know, you don't have to really stop talking to her, I just think it's enough of those private visits you pay to her every afternoon" explained Terra, sounding reasonable "She does't even appreciate it. She always send you away and insults you. I don't want to see you suffering for someone that's not worthy"
Beast Boy unleashed himself from her embrace, getting up.
"Terra, how could you say that? Of course she's worthy, she's our friend and teammate. I've explained you this, she's gonna suffer if we all left her behind. Everyone in the Tower is already busy with all the relationships and stuff"
"That's enough, Beast Boy, I'm sick of listening to this" the blonde lay on the bed "She pushes everyone away, she says she wants to be alone, if she wants to suffer, that's just her problem!"
Terra stared at Beast Boy's shocked expression, like he had just seen a side of his girlfriend he didn't know yet. Or wanted to pretend he didn't know. Selfishness.
"Is that so, Terra? I'd like to know what would have happen if, when you went to Raven to ask help with your powers, she had said to you what you just said about her"
With these words, he walked out of the room and closed the door, leaving Terra alone with her thoughts.
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Raven was sitting at a floating rock, in the middle of nowhere. The sky was black and there were other rocks floating around her, some with old trees and crows on them. She was finally calming herself. She didn't want to see any of her emotions, they realize her disturbance and went to their kingdoms.
Raven couldn't understand why she got so disturbed with what she had listened. Thinking rationally, it wasn't hard to solve what happened. Terra was already pissed with Beast Boy, and had a jealousy crisis, demanding him to stop seeing her. But why did it bother her so much?
Maybe because… She knew that Beast Boy was going to do what his girlfriend asked him to. He did everything she wanted. Still, it didn't matter to her, right? She wouldn't lose her friend. He probably would just stop bothering her every afternoon. If you think about it, it was a good thing for her. She could meditate without interruption. She could read all afternoon.
No more impatient knocks on the door.
No more boring jokes every afternoon.
No more insistent invitations to do things she didn't like.
No more warm smiles.
No more feeling like someone cared about her.
No more… Beast Boy.
She couldn't stop the tear from falling down her face. Suddenly, she knew that Happiness's kingdom would be locked. Again. The first time was when Slade showed up to tell her the End was coming. It only opened up after she defeated Trigon and the world went back to normal.
Now it would be locked up again with time, with her loneliness and she would not be able to communicate with the emotion. She didn't understand. She never realized Beast Boy's presence was so… important to her. But he was Terra's in the first place. And she could never expect him to go against Terra, the love of his life, only for a friend that treated him coldly. She wished to give the changeling his true importance. And into the depths of Rage's kingdom, she selfishly wished Terra didn't exist. Raven dried her tears and recomposed herself, feeling like a horrible person.
"I'll not suffer over this anymore" she said out loud, the words echoing "Beast Boy is not important. Terra's right, she must be, and I shouldn't be angry at her because of that, it would be selfish. Beast Boy is not important, Beast Boy is not important, Beast Boy is not important, Beast Boy is not important, Beast Boy is not important!
She stopped, taking a deep breath. She would not care about this anymore.
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