3 Laughing Through Tears
I watched the villagers standing on the dock as they grew smaller and smaller in the distance. I just wanted to dive overboard and swim back to them. But I didn't. I stared until they completely faded from view, and then I turned and walked to the bow of the ship, gazing out into the sea towards our far away destination.
I leaned over the edge of the ship, staring into the water, watching the fish leap up out of it, their silvery bodies sparkling in the sunlight. As I stared into the glistening waves, someone came up behind me. It was a man. I looked at him, wondering what it was that he wanted.
"Uh…Lady Summoner, right?" "Yes, I am a summoner." The word Summoner tasted bittersweet coming from my mouth, and the price of claiming the title was weighing heavily on my heart. As I spoke, several other people approached, and I realized that I was in for a long boat trip.
"My lady Summoner! It is a pleasure to be traveling with you! I'm Daki!" "Lady Summoner!" "Lady Summoner!" These people were getting very excited. People were asking me questions, but no one waited for me to answer their questions before someone else asked another.
Seeing that no one was listening to me, I closed out the sound of their excited shouting, and just hoped that they would go away. "I…Please!" The people quieted, realizing that I hadn't said a thing. "I think that I need to have a moment alone…?"
They mumbled some things as they left me, breaking off into small groups. I once again leaned over the edge of the boat, wondering what this had been like for my father. Did he feel depressed? I turned around and leaned on the side of the boat, and watched the Aurochs practice Blitzball.
That reminded me. I wanted to talk to Tidus. I took a short walk around the ship. I noticed him across the way, just as he did a flip over some guy, grabbing the binoculars from his hands. Tidus landed on the side of the ship, and looked off in the distance, through the binoculars, towards Kilika, or, at least towards the way our ship was going.
I am pretty sure that we were too far away to see anything yet, even through binoculars. After staring for a few seconds, he started running along the rail with perfect balance, and the guy he'd grabbed the binoculars from followed behind while shouting. He didn't seem genuinely mad, though, and Tidus was laughing. I giggled a bit.
The sight was amusing, to say the least. Tidus paused, pointing the binoculars at me, and grinning, before tossing the binoculars back to the man. I waved at him, shouting, "Hey! Come over here!" "Kay!" He shouted, jumping down from his perch, and walking over towards me, as I went back to my place, staring out into the wind at the bow of the ship.
Once he arrived, I tried to piece together what it was that I was going to say. Something about him just made me feel a little tongue tied. Stalling for time, I said, "The wind…it's nice."
"Hmm." He nodded. I think we were both holding our breaths, and we were feeling pretty uncomfortable.
I started laughing at the silly predicament that we were in, and he quickly started laughing too, though I think he was mostly laughing at me, for laughing at nothing. It felt good to be laughing like I finally remembered what it was that I was going to ask him about, I said,
"You're a blitzball player, aren't you? From Zanarkand, right?"
His expression was hard to read. "Well…I think I am…I remember everything, but Wakka…he doesn't believe me at all." I wondered why not… Wakka never met Jecht, though. I'd never really mentioned Jecht to anyone before, choosing to forget my past as much as I could.
Most people hadn't believed Jecht, either, but I did. I believed Tidus, too. I stepped back away from the bow, and he turned to look at me. I smiled. "But, I believe you! You've obviously got talent!" I blushed a little. He grinned, and said jokingly, "Well, I was the star player of the Zanarkand Abes!"
I was startled, because now I just knew, there had to be a connection between the two! Jecht also said he was the star player of the Zanarkand Abes! I was about to ask about it, but something told me that it wasn't the time, yet. I laughed, and said, "Star player, huh!" "Yup!" He said, still grinning.
"I've heard that in Zanarkand, there's a huge stadium, with tons of lights and stuff, and they even play games in it at night!" As I spoke, his eyes grew wide. "Great Blitzball tournaments are held there, and the stands are always full." I was going to continue, but the look on his face made me stop talking. He stepped forward a bit, asking, "How to you know that? I thought that was a thousand years ago."
I smiled. "A man named Jecht told me…He was my father's guardian." He was obviously aghast with this new bit of information. Then look of disgust and anger showed itself on his face. My first thought was that maybe Tidus was rivals with Jecht, or something.
He whispered the name under his breath. "What is it?" I asked, getting more and more curious.
"My father...his name is Jecht!" he growled. I was shocked and amazed at the same time. I had met the son of my father's guardian! I did the prayer gesture, quickly thanking Yevon, while shouting, "Amazing! This must be the blessing of Yevon!"
He was silent, and I just stood there, letting him think. His fists were clenched, and I couldn't help but wonder what had gone on between him and his father. After a moment of silence, he said quietly, "It sounds like him…but…it can't be." His voice sounded a bit sad. "Why not?" I asked.
He was silent for another moment, before saying, "My old man, he died. Ten years ago, off the coast of Zanarkand." I suddenly felt very stupid, realizing that I had brought up a raw subject.
I turned away, saying, "I'm sorry." "He went out to sea to train one ten years ago…and never came back. No one's seen him since then."
"Ten years?" I said very excitedly. "That's when Jecht came to Spira! I first met him ten years, and three months ago!" my voice softened, remembering the painful day. "That's the day that my father…left. The date fits. Doesn't it?"
He looked like he didn't want it to be true. He shook his head, unbelievingly, saying,
"Ah…ha, ha. Yeah…but how would he get here?"
"Well… you're here…" He looked at me, defeated. "I guess…you win." He gave me a half-smile.
Then heard Lulu calling me. I turned around, and she was leaning out of the cabin, below the deck. "Yuna! Come practice your elements!" I said, "Later, then." as I went to see Lulu. "Later!" he waved.
I spent about three hours practicing elements with Lulu below deck, and I managed to get a few drops of water, along with plenty of ice, but nothing more than that. After a while, we decided that was enough practice for the day. I was beginning to feel hungry, so we went into the little galley, and met Tidus there.
When Lulu saw him, she leaned over and whispered briefly to me, "I've lost my appetite." With that, she swung around, and left. I felt bad for Lulu. I knew it must be hard for her to be with someone who looked so much like Chappu.
I looked at the very large plate that Tidus was carrying. My eyes grew wide as I saw the huge amount of food on it. Without thinking, I said, "Are you going to eat ALL that?!" He laughed, amused by my shock. "Yeah! Star Blitzball players gotta keep up their energy, you know!" I giggled, and spoke to the cook, pointing to Tidus' plate.
"I'd like about…an eighth of that, please." The cook grinned, and spooned me up some of the slightly-less-than-appetizing looking bean stuff. Tidus and I walked out together, still chuckling about our portion size differences.
We walked to the edge of the ship. He jumped up onto it, expertly balancing his very full plate, then sat with his legs hanging over the over the water. I leaned on the side, saying,
"If I tried to do that," referring to his pose, "I would probably end up spilling all of my "food" into the sea, and then falling in after it."
We both laughed, and then ate, making a few comments, although I think both of us were avoiding the subjects that we'd spoken of this morning. At that moment, a Blitzball came flying towards me, with Datto shouting, "Sorrreeee!" I stood still in shock, things almost moving in slow motion as the Blitzball prepared to smash the last of my lunch onto my face.
Suddenly, Tidus' hand shot out, caught the ball, and flung it back to Datto, all in one, swift movement. I think just about everyone on deck saw what had happened, and suddenly, the deck was filled with laughter. Datto pinched the bridge of his nose in self-consciousness.
"Uh…sorry 'bout that Lady Yuna!" I smiled at him, while snickering and trying to swallow my mouthful of food, before it all came out of my mouth from laughing. I though of how I wanted my journey, my last days, to be full of laughter.
I looked at Tidus, and realized that he was staring at me, and I quickly looked away, suddenly feeling a bit awkward. Once the laughter had worn off, and we'd finished lunch, I decided to take a nap below deck. The emotional roller coaster I'd been on, along with trying to create elements for three hours had drained me.
When I got up, I went above deck. It seemed to be pretty late at night, maybe nine or ten. When I rounded the corner to be looking towards the bow of the ship, Tidus was there, doing a series of back flips and fancy looking jumps, while bouncing a Blitzball back and forth from the deck to himself, before kicking it with perfect aim, into the open doorway to the under-deck cabin. There was a thunderous crash, and then some guy walked out shaking his fist, before turning around muttering under his breath and slamming the door, as Tidus shouted behind him, "Sorry!"
I laughed at the man's antics, and Tidus jumped a little; he must not have realized that I was there. By the look of that shot he'd just done, he was obviously incredibly skilled at Blitzball, and, his style looked similar to his father, Jecht's style. I decided not to mention him though, not wanting to make him feel sad.
"Hey, you're really good at that! What's that shot called?" "Thanks! That shot's called Blitz Ace. I kinda just made it up…" He laughed a bit, and I laughed too. I walked towards him a little, glad that we'd finally gotten a chance to talk without other people bothering us. I wanted to ask him more about Zanarkand, but I didn't want to embarrass him around all those people who didn't believe him.
"So, can you tell me more about blitzball, and Zanarkand?" "I can tell you just about anything you want about Zanarkand! Whad'ya wanna know?""Maybe, about…" I was cut off, as a blitzball came flying from behind us, hitting Tidus in the back of the head, from the deck above.
"Heeey! It's past your bed time, you two!" Wakka grinned at us from above, and Lulu was standing beside him. I was beginning to feel like it was Wakka and Lulu's goal to make it so I couldn't hear more about Zanarkand. "I just got up!" I playfully whined back.
"Yuna, you need to rest up. We should be at our full strength at all times. Traveling by sea is dangerous; Sin could attack at any time. We need to be ready." Lulu had a good point.
"Well, I guess we can talk tomorrow then." we started towards the cabin, and once we were inside, Tidus laughed. "So, who do they think they are? Our parents?" He put his hands on his hips, and puffed out his chest, frowning, and deepening his voice, trying to speak with Wakka's accent. "It's time you two little children went to sleep!" We both laughed, then said goodnight as we parted ways for the evening.
As I pulled myself into my hammock and snuggled into my blanket, I reflected on the events of the day. I never knew that I could laugh so much on the day that I left on my pilgrimage. I'd imagined it to be glum, and depressing. It probably would have been, if it had just been Wakka, Lulu, Kimahri and me.
Something about being with Tidus just made me laugh. It was strange, and I didn't know how to explain it, but anything to help me smile was welcome. As I dozed off to sleep, I felt at peace, even though I knew that I was heading towards my death.
TidusxYuna Always
