26 Jealousy

Forty-seven days. Forty seven days without a single word uttered from anyone of us. We survived by eating the traveler's fruit that grew all along the edge of the highroad. It was juicy and thick. It was enough to satiate hunger and thirst, though after forty-seven days, it no longer tasted very good.

We slept on the ground under the stars, always with one of us keeping watch for fiends. Since Lulu couldn't speak, she was only able to use the element ice, because since it was the easiest element to summon, and she was able to do so wordlessly.

Because of having five guardians, fiends were usually easy to fight off, except for the occasional dragon fiend. For those, I was able to summon Valefor, because we were out in the open with plenty of space. The silent road was difficult, but, we survived. Tidus became an accomplished swordsman, silently training with Auron occasionally along the way.

Also, I could tell, even though no words were spoken, Lulu had begun to accept Tidus when she saw what a valuable asset he was in battle. Speed, agility and endurance were his strengths, making him a unique member of our party. When I could see the end of the highroad, Tidus and I looked at each other, both with the same idea.

We took off running, though he was practically jogging while I was sprinting. Once we reached it, I tried to shout in victory, but all that came out was a scratchy cough. We tried to talk for a several minutes while waiting for the others to get there. Tidus got it first. "That was awful." Was his simple statement. I smiled ironically, finally able to push out some words. "There's another highroad."

His countenance fell. "Ugh." There was an Al Bhed inn right near us, and right now it was looking really good. I could hardly wait to have some hot, cooked food, and to sleep on something soft. I started to approach it, but Wakka, who had just arrived grabbed my arm. He shook his head violently, a raspy sound that probably was him trying to say 'no' was emitting from his mouth.

We all stood around and waited for everyone to get their voices back. Even Lulu looked happy…somewhat. "Not an Al Bhed shop!" Wakka commanded. Auron stepped between us. "Yes, we will rest here for today and tonight. Then we will go on." "But-but! They don't believe in Yevon! And in Luca, they kidnapped Yuna!" Auron turned to Wakka and stated dryly, "Where were her guardians?" All of us drooped our heads at this. With that, Auron marched into the inn. Tidus and I followed.

The others eventually also came in. A man with shoulder length blond hair and very tan skin met us. His eyes lit up when he saw Auron, but he quickly reverted to a diplomatic air. He nodded at Auron, who nodded back. "Is this the High Summoner's daughter, Yuna?" He asked. "I am." I bowed slightly to him. "I am Rin, owner of this establishment. You may stay here m'lady, for one night at no charge, for you and your guardians." I bowed again, this time deeper. "Thank you very much, but we will pay." "No, m'lady, please, take it as a gift." I was about to say no again, but then he added, "From a friend of your father."

To this I could not refuse. Slowly, I said, "Thank you." A young Al Bhed girl led us to our rooms. Mine was large with a real bed, something I had not slept on since I was seven. It brought back such waves of nostalgia that I almost cried, but I refused myself the privilege. After sitting on the bed and pondering for a few minutes, I met the others in the cafeteria.

There we were served hot chocobo stew, sweetbread right from the oven, and some kind of fruit that I had never tasted before. It was delicious, and Tidus and I thanked the cook profusely. The others were all much less enthusiastic about anything.

Wakka barely touched his food. I pitied him for feeling so restrained by his hatred. If only he would let it go. Not all Al Bhed are bad. After the early dinner, my guardians went about their own business, while I went outside to be alone. A strong sadness had crept over me, and I knew that I needed to leave something for my guardians to remember me by, when I'm gone.

I pulled my sphere from the small pouch I wore on my belt. On it recorded my final goodbyes. As I said goodbye and thanked each one, when I finally got to Tidus, emotions swept over me, and I knew that I liked him as more than a friend.

I tried to shove away the feelings, but they were real, and they had been there since the beginning. With every day, they just grew stronger. It hurts, caring about someone so much, only to know that you have to leave them, never to see them again for all of eternity. I said none of this on my sphere, except that it hurts…I wasn't finished, but then he came up behind me.

I was surprised, but I was able to slide the sphere into my pouch before he saw it, or at least I thought so. He sat down next to me, and we both gazed at the sunset quietly for a moment, so used to being completely silent that words where hard to find.

"Yuna, what's the calm? Some other travelers where talking about it at the inn." I sighed at the thought. "The calm is a time of peace that comes after a summoner defeats Sin, and it lasts until sin is reborn." "Ooooh!" His statement was elongated from his sudden understanding. "I thought it was weird…since your Dad defeated Sin ten years ago…right? Where is your Dad, Yuna?"

I pressed my lips together to keep my sorrow at bay. "He-he died…" His head hung. "Oh. I'm sorry." There was a long silence, several minutes long before he asked, "So…if Sin just comes back, is it really-" I interrupted him, knowing what he was about to say. "Don't say it isn't worth it. Because…it is. A time when people can sleep in their beds without being afraid. That kind of time is worth anything…I wish I could live in a time like that…peaceful…with a smile on my face every day."

He looked over at me, slightly confused. "You can, once you beat Sin, right?" I avoided his question, addressing the problem instead of answering it. "But then a new Sin will be born anyway." He half smiled. "Well then, you can just beat it again." I looked down at my hands folded in my lap. "I wish I could." He just didn't understand. "Hey, you can! Trust me, you are the best summoner out there!"

I didn't answer, so he asked, "Why does Sin always come back?" I repeated the lesson that I had been taught since before I could remember. Sin is our punishment for our vanity. It will not go away permanently until we've atoned." "How do we do that? Stop using machina? What's so bad about using machina, anyway?" His questions brought me confusion. "It's funny…ever since I was young, I never questioned it. But now that you ask me if it is that bad or not…I don't know. There are so many things I don't know." "Well, we're the same, then." He said thoughtfully.

Then he added with a more playful air, and in an attempted imitation of an elderly man, "Such thinking and questioning is very unbecoming of a Summoner!" He grinned at me. "Sound like Mica?" I was ashamed of him for being so disrespectful, and I hoped Yevon would forgive it, but I could not help laughing. Somehow he was able to make something funny out of such solemn situations. "That's not very nice, you know!" I told him. He just smirked.

He laid back to look up at the sky, resting his head in his hands. "You know, during a game, you have to think of blitz and nothing else. You can't think about that party you're going to after you win, or what would happen if you lose…not that I ever lost, but that's beside the point. If you do think about other things, that's when you lose. So, uh, what I mean is, you really shouldn't worry about what happens after you win. Just think about beating Sin the first time. After we beat it, that's when you can worry about the future."

I tilted my head away from him, hoping he wouldn't see the pained expression on my face. I had no future. "I guess…" I said, trying not to let my emotions show in my voice. "But, how are you supposed to beat Sin? It's so…gigantic." "The final summoning." I replied. "It's the only way to defeat Sin. With it, I will call the Final Aeon. That's the goal of the pilgrimage. The Fayth of the Final Summoning lies waiting in the far north, to greet summoners who complete their pilgrimage. At the world's edge…in Zanarkand."

He looked at me, breathless for the moment. I was about to explain, but Auron broke in, apparently he had been listening in from behind us. "She means the ruins of a city destroyed a thousand years ago. His countenance fell. "You're sure it's ruins?" "That's what they say." I replied. I found that I actually believed him more than the teachings…at least, I wanted him to be right. "Who's they?" He asked.

I was about to answer, but Auron interrupted again. "You'll see Zanarkand for yourself soon enough. Yuna come back inside." I followed Auron, only turning back to smile sympathetically at Tidus. I could only imagine how much he must miss his home, everything he had ever known.

The next morning, we rose, ate, and stocked up on a few supplies. We were about to leave when the young Al Bhed girl who had shown us to our rooms the night before burst in, distraught. "Help!" She called in a panic. "There's a big fiend attacking the chocobos!" Tidus turned to us. "Let's go get it!" Auron squinted at him. "Why?" "It's the right thing to do." He stated, his tone indicating that he thought Auron was stupid for not knowing this.

"It's the right thing to do?" Auron repeated Tidus and then laughed a cold, empty laugh. Tidus looked to me, mildly irritated. "What'd I say now?" "Jecht used to say that a lot." Auron said. "And every time he said it, it meant trouble for Braska and me." "We're wasting time!" Tidus burst out of the inn, brandishing his sword, ignoring Auron.

The rest of us had no choice but to follow. With the six of us and Valefor, the battle was quick and relatively easy. When we re-entered the inn to pick up our stuff, Rin and the Al Bhed girl met us. "Thank you, we are very grateful to you and your guardians, Lady Summoner." Rin smiled at us, and then went outside, presumably to check all the chocobos' wellbeing. The girl went up to Tidus, grabbed his hand and smiled up at him.

"Thank you, that was very brave!" Tidus gently pulled his hand away from her and took a step back. "You're welcome." She was obviously hitting on Tidus. From deep inside me came a strange feeling, jealousy. I had never felt it before, but I knew that it what it was when I felt it. I mentally shook it off. "Okay, we should get back on the road." I said, pasting a smile on my face.

TidusxYuna Always