A/N: Oh, the things I do for you people.
As I'm writing this, my laptop clock says 12:06 am. And, no lie, it's my birthday.
(So post a review? Pretty please? :D)
There's good stuff in this chapter - some KenKao facetime (and little Shinta!), some backstory on Tae, and Soujiro attempting some romance. What more could you ask for?
Chapter Four: All Ill-at-Ease
Tae waited until most of the lunch crowd had cleared from the restaurant before making her move. She darted between the tables, nodding briefly to Soujiro as he gave her his customary smile, then slipped into the kitchen. Urato glanced at up when she appeared in the doorway, then elbowed Nizuno. "Tae-san," Nizuno greeted in surprise. "Have all the customers left?"
"No, there are still a few that remain," she said, clasping her hands together.
"Ahh, okay." Urato was looking at her a little oddly, and Tae wondered if she was looking too expectant. "Then, did you need something?"
"Actually, yes. Could you please prepare a double portion of everything - "
"Ah," Urato said again, breathing out the word as a sigh. "I know what you're getting at."
"Going visiting then, are you?" Nizuno teased, tapping the tip of one of his knives against the bamboo chopping board. "Huh... now that I think about it, it has been a while since you went."
"Since before Sou came," Urato agreed.
Tae opened her mouth to reply, but the nickname caught her off-guard. "You mean Soujiro-san," she said.
"Yeah. Sou."
She gave them both a displeased look. "Why do you call him that? You make him sound like a child."
"Well, he is short - he only comes to your shoulder," Nizuno began.
Urato cut across him. "Sou doesn't care, Tae-san. He said so. Besides, we have nicknames for everyone here except for you, 'cause your name can't get any shorter."
"And we know, we know: you don't like nicknames," Nizuno said, giving his companion a bored look.
Tae didn't like to argue, really she didn't. But the glance they shared - as though they were almost annoyed with her preferences - made her want to defend herself. "Because it isn't professional," she said, keeping her voice low and calm. "And I wouldn't mind the name-calling so much if - "
"Nicknames are not the same thing as name-calling!" Urato interjected indignantly.
" - if you did not include our customers in your habit," she said, straightening her spine.
They both looked at her blankly. "If you mean Sano - "
"Sanosuke-san," she corrected stiffly.
The chefs grinned at each other. "But no one calls him that," Nizuno said, and she could tell from his voice that he was trying hard not to laugh. "Just you."
She shook her head stubbornly. "But the point is - "
Now they did burst into laughter. Tae scowled at them for a long moment, and then slowly let out her breath in a sigh. She threw up her hands, giving up the argument. "Just prepare the food, that's all I care about," she told them. "I'll go ask Tsubame - "
"Yes, Tae-san?" Tsubame's tentative voice asked behind her.
Tae turned to face the young girl, her smile sliding into place. "Tsubame-chan, would you like to come with me to visit Kenshin-san and Kaoru-chan?"
Her eyes grew as wide as tea saucers. "You're going now?"
"While it is still the lunch hour, yes," she said.
A bright smile filled Tsubame's face. "I would! I really would!"
"How many tables do you have left?"
"Just two, Tae-san. But they should be done soon, I think."
"Alright, then." Tae nodded toward the main floor of the restaurant. "Ask Hana-chan if she will watch your tables for you. As soon as the food is ready, we'll leave."
Tsubame bobbed her head and scurried off. Behind Tae, Urato drawled, "do you think Kaoru-san will let her see the new baby this time?"
Tae whirled around. "How did you know about that?" She asked, glaring at the shared amusement on the chef's faces.
"Kaoru-san's fierce protectiveness of her children is legendary," Nizuno said. He arched an eyebrow as he sliced up some cabbage, his hands a blur of movement. "Don't you remember when Kenji was born? She didn't come out in public for half a year. And even then, when anyone got too close to her child, she went all Kamiya Kasshin style on them and her husband had to pull her off."
Tae winced, remembering. That hadn't been a happy day at the Akabeko.
"It's only been a few months since she had her last child," Urato reminded her. He carried the strips of beef and noodles to the pot on the other side of the counter and carefully laid them out to cook. "Do you think she's gotten any less defensive this time around?"
"She was very courteous last time," Tae defended meekly. It was true: Kaoru had been very polite - but then, Tae hadn't tried to get very close.
The chefs snorted at her response.
"She was," Tae insisted. She watched Nizuno as he poured the diced vegetables in beside the meat, artfully shuffling the food around so nothing overlapped. "I suppose I understand," she mused, brushing her hair idly away from her forehead. "Your children are, well, yours, I suppose. A part of you. You'd want to protect them, to take care of them, especially since they were so little. I guess when you looked at them, you'd see aspects of you inside them, and aspects of the father. That must be a very humbling experience for Kaoru-chan."
Urato sniggered, eyeing her with a smirk. "Too bad you won't have that 'experience', since even you need to be humbled sometimes, Tae-san."
I won't have...? Tae's mouth fell open. For one stunned moment, she completely lost control. All of the breath left her body, and she felt unsteady on her feet. Tears pricked at her eyes and her throat threatened to close.
Nizuno swiftly looked up at her, gauging her expression. He half-raised his arm to whack Urato upside the head, but Tae quickly shook her head.
"I... suppose that you are right," she said a little breathlessly, still feeling as though she had been slapped. "Forgive me, Urato-san. I will do my best to control my ego in the future."
Urato looked up, no doubt at the hint of bitterness in her wavering voice, and Tae quickly glanced away. Abruptly she wanted to be out of the kitchen, out of the Akabeko, and away from here. She didn't really want to see Kaoru and her new child anymore, not when Urato's careless comment had shaken her so much, but she had already told Tsubame.
She wished it were spring so she could go to the back garden and sit on the bench, alone.
"Is the food almost ready?" she asked, still not looking at either of the chefs.
Nizuno answered. "Uh, almost done, Tae-san."
She nodded and turned to go. "Good. Then I'll tell Tsubame - "
Soujiro stood a few paces behind her, just inside the kitchen doorway. Tae stopped short at the sight of him. His eyes flickered up to hers, to the chefs behind her, then back to her again. "Are you alright?" He asked quietly.
"I..." His smile, she realized suddenly. His smile is gone. In just over a week that he'd been working at the Akabeko, she'd never seen him without his telltale smile. It made him look... well, different. The childish hint to his features was gone, and he looked almost serious.
He is handsome. She was loathe to admit it when she'd heard the customers talking or when her father had pressured her for an answer, but they were right. He is. Quite handsome.
"Tae-san," Soujiro repeated.
Tae shook herself, knowing she was distressing him and hating her lack of self-control. She drew upon her years of mimicked courtesy and kindness and forced a smile onto her face. "Of course," she said, pouring assurance into her voice. "Perfectly."
He only blinked at her, and she wasn't sure if he was fooled or simply surprised. She supposed she should have made the change to her outward disposition more gradual, regardless of her haste. "Have you seen Tsubame-chan?" she asked.
"Yes," he said, still looking at her. "She was asking Hana-chan if she could cover the remaining tables."
Pretend you are happy, and then you will be. That was what her father had always told her. And I am, she added. I'm going to visit Kaoru-chan and her new baby. I want to get away from the Akabeko for a while. It will be good for me.
That's close enough to happiness.
"Thank you, Soujiro-san," she said, and the smile she wore felt more earnest, more real than before.
Soujiro's expression shifted slightly, but before Tae could decide why, Tsubame hurried through the kitchen door. "Hana-chan said she would, Tae-san!"
Tae nodded toward the chefs. "Go pack up everything in the large lacquered box, Tsubame-chan. You know the one."
Tsubame beamed and rushed to obey. Soujiro tilted his head inquisitively. "Where are you going, Tae-san?"
"To visit a friend and her family," she answered, turning to follow Tsubame. Then she paused. "Soujiro-san," she said, looking back at him. "Would you like to come?"
"I would, yes."
Tae nodded. "Good. Then you will come with us to bring food to the Himuras."
Another expression appeared and promptly vanished, swifter than before. A bright smile broke across his face. "I would like that," he said warmly.
"Good," Tae said again, accepting the heavy box from Tsubame. She promptly turned and pushed it into his arms. "Then you will carry their meal," she said, grinning at the look of surprise that took the place of that glinting smile. "Do you still want to come?"
He nodded, the familiar childlike optimism leaking into his face once again. "Of course."
It had taken a few minutes of subtle movements and glances, but eventually Soujiro had managed to secure a position on Tae's right. Tsubame, who he supposed usually walked next to Tae, only sent him one quizzical look before retreating two steps behind them. Soujiro pretended that he hadn't noticed; he didn't care what Tsubame thought right now.
From the corner of his eye, Soujiro was watching Tae.
If he had not been there, he might not have believed it. Soujiro had never felt ki change so fast - at least, he corrected himself, not from a person that wasn't in the middle a battle, or about to initiate one. But even more curious was how abruptly she had gone from despair to good cheer. It was easy for emotions to shift to anger - Soujiro had seen that hundreds of time - but for them to transition the opposite way, and suddenly... well, that was rare. It was so uncommon that he had to think if he had met someone whose emotions had flipped so convincingly, so seamlessly. And finally he had to admit that no, he couldn't think of anyone.
Anyone except himself, of course.
The very idea of it left him somewhat... stunned.
On the way to the dojo where the Himuras lived, Tae struck up a light conversation with Tsubame, so Soujiro took advantage of her distraction to study her. If Tae had grown up differently, she might have made a fair swordsman. That skill of concealing her emotions would have helped, in addition to the fact of her sex. There were more women who studied the sword after the Meiji - Himura-san's wife was proof of that - but even ten years ago, when the era still seemed new, her gender would have been distinctive. It would have perturbed her would-be opponents, if only for a few, crucial moments.
Soujiro tilted his head slightly, examining Tae more closely. Her posture was nearly perfect for holding a sword, and she had learned to move quickly and quietly in the restaurant - another valuable skill. Her height was rather tall for a woman, but then, he mused, she could disguise herself as a man. That would change everything altogether, and to her favor.
He was trying to imagine Tae wearing hakama - and failing because of the useless and beautiful lace on her apron - when they stopped outside the main gate. Tae took the lacquered box from Soujiro and, after a slight hesitation, smiled apologetically. "It's probably best if you stay back," she said. "I'm almost certain that Kaoru-chan is not up for visitors yet, and she can be..."
"Scary!" Tsubame supplied, shivering a little. Tae nodded, and Soujiro raised his eyebrows at them. The Battousai had married a woman who was frightening?
"Yes," agreed Tae, "so forgive me, Soujiro-san. Tsubame-chan will keep you company while I visit. I won't be long."
He nodded and stepped back, but he couldn't help glancing up at the rectangular notice beside the door as he did so. The Kamiya dojo. He remembered looking at that sign the last time he'd been to Tokyo, all those years ago. And once again, he thought ironically, stepping back a safe distance so he wouldn't be seen when the door opened, I won't be going inside.
Soujiro and Tsubame looked on as Tae knocked on the door. "Kaoru-chan!" she called, "It's Tae. I've brought some food!"
When the door did not immediately open, Soujiro asked Tsubame, "do you think they've already eaten?"
"Probably, I think. But it doesn't matter," Tsubame replied cheerfully, "because Kaoru-san is always hungry!"
Soujiro blinked. A woman who was both frightening and ravenous?
The door opened. Tae's smile snapped into place - almost automatically, Soujiro noted, though it did seem natural enough - and held up the box, as if to show it off. Two hands appeared from the other side of the doorway, clothed in dark blue sleeves - and suddenly Soujiro knew, he just knew, that it was Himura-san Tae was speaking to - and took the box from her arms. Tae bent her head respectfully and then walked through the door. The gate slid shut behind her.
For a few moments, Tsubame and Soujiro stared at the place where Tae had vanished. Then Tsubame sighed and tucked her arms inside her winter jacket. "Now we wait," she said.
Soujiro tore his eyes away from the gate and glanced at Tsubame. Now was as good a time as any for him to learn some things about Tae. "How does Tae-san know the Himura family?" he asked, though he already knew the answer.
"The Himuras come to the Akabeko a lot," Tsubame said, turning to him. "And Kaoru-san has been friends with Tae-san ever since she came here from Kyoto when she was small."
"To learn about how to run the Akabeko," Soujiro said, nodding.
"No. I mean, she did end up doing that, but not to begin with."
"Oh?" He queried, keeping the curiosity out of his voice.
"Um..."
For some reason, Tsubame began to look uncomfortable. She glanced away, and her ki roiled with regret. "I - I don't think I should have said anything," she said, her cheeks flushing pink. "Tae-san never talks about it - she only told me once, long ago - "
"It's alright, Tsubame-san," Soujiro said. He turned to face Tsubame and gave her his best, most reassuring smile. "I won't tell anyone."
Her eyes flickered up to his, her bottom lip caught between her teeth. "I - I know, Soujiro-san. But..."
He waited for her to continue, but she never did. Well. Perhaps he could get the information from her later, when she wasn't so flustered -
"But," Tsubame said again, slowly, "I... she only told me that she had to leave Kyoto because of the Bakumatsu."
Soujiro looked up. "The Revolution?"
She nodded. "And Tae-san hasn't been back since."
"I see." Shishio had told him stories - accounts of how he had hunted down and killed anyone the Ishin Shishi wanted: rival swordsmen from the Shoganate or Shinsengumi, politicians or traitors, along with the people who were foolish enough to get in his way. When Soujiro was younger, the Bakumatsu sounded exciting and thrilling. Shishio was all the more powerful and right for dealing out cold justice, and Soujiro had wished he could have been older then, so he could have fought by Shishio's side. But in the years since Shishio's death, Soujiro had realized that though the Bakumatsu was many years in the past, people still remembered it. To them, it was a time of fear, of blood, of death. It was not a time that was remembered with any degree of happiness - on the contrary, most people wished they could forget it.
Soujiro understood why the majority of the people felt that way, but he still didn't agree.
He wondered what Tae thought.
"Was her family targeted?" He asked. That would determine her opinion, certainly.
"I don't know," Tsubame admitted.
"I see," he said again, knowing he couldn't push any further.
They fell silent again until, a few minutes later, Soujiro sensed the first spark of a familiar ki. He looked down the road and squinted against the distant buildings. Sure enough, someone was walking purposefully their way.
"Ah," Soujiro murmured, and Tsubame glanced up. Her face lit up with joy.
"Yahiko-kun!"
"Tae!"
Tae turned at her name, and grinned when she caught sight of Kaoru coming down the hallway. A little child was curled against her shoulder, one tiny hand clutching a fold of her kimono between his fingers. "Good afternoon, Kaoru-chan," Tae said, then bent her head to look at the boy, her voice adopting a soft coo. "And hello, Shinta-chan! How are you?"
"He's been sleeping all day," Kaoru said. Her fingers brushed the dark, wispy strands of his hair affectionately. "He's very quiet - the opposite of Kenji, in many ways."
Tae chuckled, knowing what Kenji was like. That must be a relief for Kenshin and Kaoru. "Shinta-chan has grown so big since the last time I saw him!" she exclaimed.
"Yes, he barely fits into the jinbei you gave him. He's growing so fast."
"What does Kenji-chan think about Shinta-chan?"
Kaoru looked up over Shinta's head to give Tae an amused smile. "I don't think he can decide whether to be entertained or bored by Shinta."
Tae laughed. That didn't surprise her one bit. "I'm glad to see you well, Kaoru-chan. Kenshin-san mentioned that you had been feeling ill last week - "
"O-Oh! Don't be concerned for me, Tae, I'm much better now." Kaoru's slight embarrassment turned into a fond sigh. "Kenshin does worry so much about Shinta and I. Almost more than when Kenji was born, you know?"
Tae nodded. She had seen it in the way Kenshin's face had brightened when he'd seen her at the door, when the first thing he said was, "Kaoru-dono will be so pleased to see you, that she will." She had seen it in the glances he sent Kaoru's way when they were in public together, and in the softening of his eyes when he spoke about her.
Kenshin and Kaoru were happy together. And, it seemed, their married lives were practically perfect. Tae squashed down the jealousy before it could rise to the surface.
"Please let me know if you need anything," Tae said. "I try to remember to visit and bring some food, but sometimes I get caught up in the restaurant and I forget."
Kaoru took a step forward. "You don't have to worry about that," she said, a little firmly. "I am so happy to see you when you come, but it's alright, Tae. Kenshin and I..." She paused, and a smile spread across her face. "When we're ready, we'll come back out again."
"We would be glad to see you back at the Akabeko again," Tae replied, inclining her head.
A door opened on the other end of the hallway and Kenshin stepped out. "I've set out the meal," he said, his eyes lingering on Kaoru before glancing at Tae. "Will you join us, Tae-dono?"
"Yes, will you?" Kaoru asked hopefully.
Tae shook her head. "I'm sorry, but there are some people waiting for me outside the gate."
"Who is it? Tsubame, I bet."
"Yes, and..." Tae took a breath, bracing herself for her friends' shock."...the Akabeko's new waiter."
They both turned to stare at her in amazement. "Oro?" Kenshin asked at the same time that Kaoru gasped, "you're hiring waiters now?"
"My father suggested it," Tae defended. She held up her hands, as it to ward off their surprise. "And so I did, and he was right - the Akabeko is even more popular now."
Kenshin looked pensive. "I suppose that is just another sign of the changes that this era has brought."
"True," Kaoru agreed. "I would like to meet him sometime."
"I'll bring him by in a few months, to officially meet you," Tae said.
"Officially?" Kaoru echoed. She gave Tae a slow, sidelong look, and Tae recoiled, recognizing that glint in her friend's eye. "Hm. Is the new waiter handsome? Is that why he's drawing more customers?"
Tae forced her expression into calm. Why did everyone feel the need to ask her if she thought Soujiro was attractive? "Well," she began cautiously, "he is... somewhat... yes."
Kaoru raised an eyebrow and leaned closer. "And you think so too, right?"
Tae definitely knew where this was going. "Yes," she admitted.
"And what about his personality? Do you think he's - "
"Kaoru-chan," she sighed.
"A possible relationship is not so unacceptable now, in the Meiji era," Kaoru said. Her eyes were wide and innocent, but there was a glimmer of curious mischief; Kaoru was teasing her, half jokingly. "As long as he's a kind, trustworthy man, it won't matter that he's your employee."
But the stigma is still there, to some extent, Tae corrected silently. To Kaoru, she only smiled. "I might have thought that, once," she said softly. "But I have to think realistically now. That will never happen, Kaoru-chan. Not to me."
Kaoru opened her mouth to contradict her, but Tae shook her head. "I have to go," she said, stepping back. She glanced over at Kenshin and bent her head respectfully. "Please enjoy," she said. "I will try to visit again soon."
"Tae-dono, let me see you out - "
"That's alright," she said, smiling. "Please, eat before it gets cold."
I can't let myself start thinking like that again, she thought as she crossed through the doorway and into the entry hall. Too many times I begin thinking it's possible. I let myself dream, and then it turns out horribly. It always does. My obligations to the Akabeko, my dominant personality, my plain face - all of it adds up to one thing: I am an un-marriable person. I know that. I've accepted it, so I can't let myself hope now.
Besides, she added as she stepped outside, Soujiro is young and handsome. Surely he would want someone else equally young and beautiful, and not me.
Lost in her thoughts, Tae reached out to open the gate only to find it sliding open in front of her from the other side. Soujiro stood there, smiling his bright smile. "Welcome back, Tae-san!" he greeted cheerfully.
She stopped and blinked at him. "Oh, Soujiro-san. Did... you hear me coming?"
He shrugged. "Something like that." He stood back to let her pass and she joined him in the street.
"Where is Tsubame-chan?" she asked as he pushed the gate closed.
"Yahiko came by, so - "
"Ah," she said understanding. "So it's just the two of us, then."
"That's right."
His voice was as light as ever, but something in the way he said the words made a part of her stiffen in response. Suddenly she was aware of his blue eyes on her, and the way he stood leaning toward her, close enough to touch. There was a silence between them now, stretching longer and longer as the seconds passed and she didn't reply. But what could she say? She could only think of his hands, hanging relaxed by his sides, and that she could not look at his face. She would not let him know that she was suddenly very shy, but couldn't say why.
Tae cleared her throat - where were her skills at pretending now? She sounded nervous and awkward, and she could feel him staring at her - and coughed out the first thing that came to her head. "I'm sorry."
"For what, Tae-san?"
His voice sounded perfectly natural, of course. Tae swallowed, cursing her lack of control, and abruptly began to walk. "For staying so long. I didn't know you were outside alone."
"I didn't mind." He kept pace with her, staying just barely within sight to her left.
"Really?" She made herself focus straight ahead. "I hope it wasn't too boring for you."
"Not at all. I was just thinking about something, that's all."
She replied without thinking, "oh?" but then regretted it a second later. She had enough time to worry, in a wave of silly paranoia, if he was thinking about her. If he was somehow aware of her conversation with Kaoru and was mulling over it.
He was silent for a few seconds and then he finally said, "Tae-san, you told me once that you'd lived in Kyoto."
Tae blinked. This was so unexpected that she, too, paused before responding. "Well, yes, that's true." She smiled. "I think everyone can tell, though, because of my accent."
"Why didn't you go back?" He tilted his head to the side, glancing over at her. "Your family is all in Kyoto, isn't that right? Why didn't you ever go back to them?"
She started in surprise. Soujiro saw her wide-eyed expression and immediately bowed his head. "I'm sorry, Tae-san," he said. "I didn't mean to ask something I shouldn't."
She shook her head. "No, it's alright. It's... something that my father and my siblings write to me about often."
Soujiro looked up and she met his eyes, her previous skittishness mysteriously vanished. Thankfully. "A few of my family members were involved in the Bakumatsu," she said.
He waited, his eyes never once deviating from her own.
Tae took a deep breath. "My father was a courier. He delivered everything from supplies and letters to the Bakufu's soldiers, using the Shirobeko - our restaurant in Kyoto - as a halfway house. My uncle actually fought; he was wounded quite severely in a skirmish of some kind against some Ishin Shishi. He worried that they would pursue him, so my family arranged to send him to Edo under the guise that he was setting up his own restaurant here."
"And you?" Soujiro prompted when she fell silent.
The corner of her lips tipped upwards. "I was sent to help solidify his cover."
"Ah."
Tae rubbed her hands together in the chill air. "It's not something that everyone knows, " she explained, sure that Soujiro was wondering why he hadn't heard the story before. "My uncle was a suspicious man, and I've adopted some of that from him, I think. So, if you... that is, if you wouldn't mind..."
He smiled at her. "I don't mind keeping your secrets."
Soujiro's gaze felt too heavy again and she dropped her eyes. "Thank you," she told him, nodding jerkily.
"I do have a question, though," he said. "If you were suspicious of the Ishin Shishi, then how did you overcome it to make friends with Himura Kenshin?"
Tae gaped at him. He knew? And clearly he wasn't afraid of the Battousai's reputation, since he walked with her to Kenshin's home. A spark of pride bloomed inside her, that Soujiro was so trusting, that he had believed whoever had told him about Kenshin, that he didn't hold Kenshin's past against him.
She smiled. The answer was so easy. "Because Kenshin-san has changed," she said simply. "He's not the Battousai any longer."
Soujiro looked away, absorbing her response. "And you believe that?" He asked after a few moments. "You think that someone can change? Just like that?"
"It had been ten years," she pointed out. "But yes. I think anyone can change."
He was silent. After a while, Tae glanced at him. She was about to ask if he was alright when there was a soft tearing sound and she stumbled. Suddenly Soujiro was in front of her, one arm braced under her ribs and the other curved around her shoulders.
"Are you alright?" He asked.
She hadn't even had time to gasp or cry out; he was there, arresting her fall. She took a shaky breath, still feeling the strange, almost vertigo-like sensation that she should be falling and knowing that she wasn't. "Y-yes," she said, fighting for the calm she had heard in his voice. "I'm fine. What... what was it?"
His eyes flickered down and then up again. "A strap on your shoe broke."
"Oh," she breathed. "How troublesome."
For the slightest moment, it looked as though a smirk of amusement crossed his face. But that wasn't right, because she couldn't see what was funny. "It happens more often than you'd think."
"I'll need to buy another pair."
"That's alright, I'll do it for you tomorrow morning."
"You don't have to - "
"I want to."
They stared at each other for a long moment. Slowly Tae became aware of the fact that she was half-reclining in Soujiro's arms, his chest pressed against her side. In his haste to catch her, Soujiro's hand had slipped under her coat. She could feel his fingers pressing against her skin, warm underneath the thick layer of clothing. Her own hands had clenched the front of his jacket, knotting the fabric between her knuckles.
Tae swallowed. She could feel her face burning in the winter air, and she quickly broke eye-contact. That rigid fear was creeping in again, freezing her limbs, and she knew that in a few moments, she'd be utterly useless. "T-Thank you for catching me," she said, wincing internally at the slight catch in her voice.
"Yes," he said, softer than before. His arm tightened around her, pulling her closer, and Tae looked up at him in shock. Was he going to kiss her? His face was close enough - they were close enough - and he probably could if he wanted to.
Did she want him to?
Tae's traitorous eyes fluttered, and suddenly she wasn't sure whether she should resist him or not.
Maybe she wouldn't.
Soujiro stopped, and Tae held her breath. After a moment, he slid his arms away from her and helped her stand. "Are you alright?" He asked again.
"Yes." Disoriented and feeling strangely let down, she wondered why he had drawn her close only to push away, and then realized: it was an embrace. Soujiro had hugged her.
The sweet melting feeling in her heart must have triggered an unconscious expression on her face, because Soujiro stepped forward again, his hand hovering above her shoulder. "Tae-san?"
"I'm fine. Just fine."
"Will you be able to walk?"
"I think so." And she did, albeit with a small limp in order to keep her broken shoe in place. But that didn't matter, because Soujiro had hugged her.
He had hugged her.
And that thought kept her warm all the way back to the Akabeko.
They parted ways at the kitchen, where Tae continued down the hall toward the stairs for the second floor. Soujiro watched her walk a few steps before ducking through the doorway.
"Ah - Soujiro-san?" she called.
He quickly poked his head back into the doorway. Tae had paused halfway up the staircase, her hand on the railing. "Let's have another English lesson tonight," she said.
Soujiro blinked up at her. Tsubame had joined him for the lessons in the past, but she had said earlier that she had plans that night. "Tsubame-san won't be there," he told Tae.
Tae nodded slowly. "I know." She straightened, looking down at him. "Would you rather not?"
"No, it's alright. I don't mind."
She nodded, gave him a brief smile, then continued up the steps.
Soujiro watched the top of the stairs long after Tae had vanished. He would be with Tae that night. Alone.
Exactly the opportunity he'd been waiting for.
He smiled.
