EN ROUTE TO VANCOUVER

It is the middle of the night; at least it feels like it to Eva. Looking outside at the constant blackness of space does not help matters. The family is on a transport ship headed to Vancouver. In a few days Mia makes her professional skyball debut.

Feeling a little sick to her stomach Eva paces the small suite on the ship. She doesn't want to wake anyone but at the same time she wants to talk to someone.

"Eva?"

The asari turns to see who is talking to her. "Aethyta?"

"Uh oh."

"What?"

"You must have something on your mind. You don't usually use my name. Are you okay?"

Eva is a little surprise and relieved all at once. "Uh…fine. I just can't sleep."

Little A sits on the chair in the main room. "What's going on?" she asks while she yawns.

Eva sits across from her. She lets out a sigh.

"This about James?"

"Are you sure you can't sense things like Raina? Geez."

Little A studies her older sister. "You love him?"

Eva shrugs her shoulders, "I don't know, I think so. I mean I miss him already. He…well he is just so full of life you know? He wants to explore the galaxy and write about it. Live, like really live."

"Oh boy."

"What?"

"You have it bad."

Eva stands, "Look if you are going to make fun of me just go back to bed." She feels the sting of heat behind her eyes.

Little A stands and places her hands on Eva's arms. "Hey no no, I'm sorry Eva. I…I am not making fun of you. I'm sorry." Little A steps back. "Have you told Mom and Dad?"

Eva wipes her cheek when a tear drops. "And tell them what exactly? I saw Mom's reaction to meeting James."

"You know Mom. She doesn't want any of us to grow up, not really. If she had her way none of us would leave the house until we were 300 or older." Little A sits back down. She watches Eva pace a little. "He is planning on coming to Thessia isn't he?"

Eva stops and turns to look at her sister. "How do you know that? Are you sure you don't have Raina's gift?"

Little A smiles, "I see how he looked at you Eva, how you looked at each other. He said he was going to travel, it is not hard to put two and two together."

Eva sits. "He wants me to come with him."

"What?" Little A sits up and leans forward.

"Yeah. He told me he loves me Aethyta. He…loves me."

"Oh boy."

"Yeah, oh boy."

Little A lets out a breath. "Don't get mad."

Eva gives her a look. "You know when you say that that I am going to get mad."

"You have only known him for two months Eva. I mean it's one thing to have feelings for him and want to be with him, but follow him around the galaxy after knowing him for two months. I mean, what do you really know about him? And don't tell me you know everything you need to know."

Eva looks at her sister. "I know he is someone I have learned so much from already. Not just his lust for life Aethyta, but how he writes. He is so lyrical with his words. I am just in awe of him really."

Little A remains quiet.

"I…I just have never felt this way about anyone before. It's scary and exciting all at once. I mean his lips…" Eva averts her eyes.

"He a good kisser?"

Eva nods her head. "I melt. I just melt when he kisses me. I don't know what to do with these feelings."

Little A smiles.

"What are you grinning at?"

"You are in love Eva."

Eva sighs, "I think I am and it terrifies me."

"Welcome to the club."

"Does it get any easier?"

"Nope."

Eva slumps back in her chair, "Great."

"What are you going to do?"

"About?"

"Eva. Are you going to follow him?"

"I want to. A part of me really, really wants to. I don't want to lose this feeling even if it does make me feel a little sick to my stomach."

"And the other part?"

Eva sighs, "The other part says I hardly know him. It is far too risky. Mom and Dad would never allow it and if I push and go anyway what happens to my relationship with them?"

"I think you still need to talk to them Eva, tell them how you feel. They might surprise you."

"Maybe. I need to figure out what I am feeling first."

"Good luck with that."

"What do you mean?" Eva sits up.

"I mean, being in a relationship can tear your heart out, heal it, love it and rip it out all over again. I wouldn't say I am an expert by any means Eva, but Kaya and I, well we have known each other for years and then started dating. And now that she is away, I feel lost, alone, like I am missing a part of me and it is terrible. I never thought love could hurt like this. There are some days I wish I never met her, and then I wouldn't feel this."

"Oh Aethyta I didn't know."

Little A waves a dismissive hand, "It's okay. I am learning to deal with it. And I am glad I have her. I think she is feeling it too which is why she is burying herself in her work. When you keep busy your mind doesn't have time to think about what you don't have, or what you long for. It's moments like this…"

"…the feelings come out." Eva finishes her thought.

Little A gives her a small smile. "Exactly." She sits up, elbows on knees and looks at Eva. "If you are going to follow him Eva, have something for you. Don't put yourself in a situation where you have nothing to do but wait for him to come home. Find work, write, submit articles, stay busy. If you don't, your life becomes all about him and that may make you miserable."

Eva studies her sister for a minute. "Is that what is happening with you? You feel like your life is all about Kaya right now? Waiting for her to call?"

Little A clears her throat. She lets out a breath, "Yeah. I have been miserable. Coming here on this trip has helped though because my mind is on something other than me. I have been so caught up in me, me, me and what I don't have I have made myself completely miserable."

"You have been hard to be around." Eva smiles at her.

"Yeah, sorry."

"Have you spoken to her?"

"We talked for an hour last night. She is miserable too. I told her what I just told you. Told her to focus on her work and try not to think about us. I just hope it was the right thing to say because I don't want us to grow apart…" her voice catches.

Eva stands and goes to her sister. She hugs her. "I am sure everything will work out Little A."

Little A hugs Eva tightly. "I know…it's…it's just really hard right now."

Eva lets go of her and kneels in front of her. "Have you asked Mom and Dad about going to Sur'Kesh?"

"No not yet. It isn't a good time for Kaya right now. The program she is in is very demanding. I mean the point is to work and that's about it. She doesn't have a lot of free time, which is why it has been so hard to talk to her."

"I'm sorry." Eva squeezes her sister's hand.

Little A gives her a small smile, "Thanks. So what are you going to do?"

Eva stands and lets out a long sigh. She places her hands on her hips. "I think I am going to leap."

"I'm sorry?"

Eva smiles, "Leap. I am going to tell Mom and Dad that I want to follow James. That I want to see the galaxy and experience life from the eyes of those around me. I am going to leap Aethyta. It is time to take a risk."

Little A stands. She places her hand on her sister's shoulder. "Good for you."

Eva takes her hand and looks her in the eye. "Will you be with me when I tell them? You don't have to say anything, I just …well I would like your support."

"Of course."

Eva hugs her. "Thank you Sis. You're the best."

Little A remains in her arms but leans back to look her in the eye. "Guard your heart Eva."

Eva swallows. She is a little surprised at the sudden seriousness of sister.

"I mean it. Don't forget who are. Don't forget what Mom and Dad has taught us. Guard your heart."

Eva sees the pain in her sister's eyes and wonders if things with Kaya are going to work or if there is an inevitability that will be realized.

"I love you Eva."

"I love you Little A," she hugs her again. "Thank you. Your wisdom amazes me and I thank you." Eva cups her cheek.

"Well I don't know about you, but I am beat. I am going back to bed." Little A starts to walk toward the bedroom she and Eva share in the suite. She turns to face her sister, "You coming?"

"In a bit."

Without another word Little A leaves her sister alone with her thoughts.


THESSIA

Valya is making breakfast. It is early. Her daughter Dava has been working out with the commandos and they begin early. She doesn't remember the last time she had to be up so early except when she was herself a commando.

"Hi Dad."

Valya smiles when she sees her daughter. The transformation Dava has gone through since being released from the hospital has been amazing to say the least. The former commando could not be more proud of her daughter. "Morning."

Dava sits at the kitchen table after grabbing some juice Valya left on the counter. "I will be gone all day today. Not sure I will be home for dinner."

Valya sets a plate of food in front of her daughter then sets down a plate for herself.

Dava waits until her father is seated before starting to eat. "Hmm this is good thank you."

Valya just stares at her daughter.

Dava looks up, "What?"

"I am so damn proud of you."

Dava slowly finishes chewing then swallows. "Why?"

"Are you kidding? With everything you have been through? You are growing stronger each day Dava and it makes me proud. I'm glad Arelia allowed you to work out with the commandos, seems to have helped."

"It has." Dava pushes food around her plate.

"What is it?"

Dava sets down her fork and looks at her father. "I am going to join the commandos."

"Yeah you said that. You'll be late tonight, got it."

"No…no Dad. I am going to join them."

Valya stops eating. She looks at her daughter. She sees how serious she is but there is also a sadness in her eyes. "Excuse me?"

"I have been talking with Arelia."

"Excuse me?" Valya stands. "What do you mean you have been talking to Arelia?"

Dava remains calm. "Dad. I have given this a lot of thought."

"Oh really? A lot of thought? You haven't been out of the hospital long enough to say you have given this a lot of thought." Valya is raising her voice now.

Dava slowly stands. "Nevertheless, I am joining them Dad."

Valya shakes her head, "I…I don't believe this. No..no no no. You will do no such thing."

"And who's going to stop me Dad, you?" Dava raises her voice now and steps closer to her father.

Valya flinches a little. She flashes back to when her daughter threw her against the wall.

"See. That is one of the reasons I need to leave Dad."

Blinking quickly Valya asks, "What? What are you talking about?"

"You are afraid of me Dad, don't deny it. I just saw it in your eyes."

"No..no I…"

"Oh come on Dad!" Dava stops herself and takes a breath. "I am doing better and I will continue to do better because of the commandos, because of the unit. I like the camaraderie Dad, I need it. I thought you would be happy that I am following in your footsteps."

Valya moves into the family room. She is a little shocked. She sits in her chair.

"Dad?"

Valya feels the heat behind her eyes. "When?"

"When what?"

"When do you leave?"

Dava lets out sigh and sits on the arm of the couch across from her father. "Next week."

Valya closes her eyes tight hoping this is just a dream that her daughter is not leaving her all alone, not now, not so soon after her bondmate's death.

"Dad?"

"How long?" Valya doesn't look at her as tears start to fall.

"Six months."

Valya's head shoots up, "Six months? What?"

"I have three months of training then three more months of specialized training. There will be times that I can come home, I mean if you will have me."

Valya looks at her daughter, "Of course I will have you Dava, I love you. I…I can't believe this. I can't believe you are leaving."

"It really is best for me Dad. You have to know that."

"What…what about Mia?"

"Dad. Mia has moved on which is exactly what I am trying to do."

"And you think running away is moving on?" Valya stands now.

"I am not running away Dad. I am running toward something."

"Seems like running away to me. What did I do? Have I not been patient enough? Have I not…"

"…Dad, what are you doing? This isn't about you. This is about me and what I need."

Valya looks at her daughter. "I …I don't know what to say."

"It's not like you're going to be alone Dad. You have Akira."

Valya feels like she has been hit in the gut. "Wh..what are you talking about?"

"Oh give me a break. I saw you. I saw the two of you."

Valya furrows her brow and shakes her head, "What? I…I don't understand. When?"

"You were right there." Dava points at the kitchen. "You were hugging."

Valya tries to remember when this happened.

"I slipped out of the hospital and I saw you. Know the hill up there?" Dava points at the kitchen window. "I had a bird's eye view of you two."

"When you escaped the hospital." Valya says it more to herself. "That is not what it looked like Dava." Valya stands now.

"Mom wasn't even dead a week and you are in the arms of another woman. Guess some things never change."

"You are out of line Dava! I am not in a relationship with Akira. She was here helping me."

"Yeah I saw."

"And what exactly did you see? Tell me. Huh? Did you see us kissing? Huh? What exactly did you see Dava? And who did you see it with?"

Dava narrows her eyes at her father, "What difference does it make who I was with."

Valya calms herself, "Because honey if you were with Shadow, she wanted you to see what she wanted, not what was real. Think. What did you see?"

Valya can see her daughter thinking back on the memory. "You two were hugging."

"Why?" Valya's voice is calmer now.

"You…you were crying." Dava looks at her father. "Why were you crying?"

Valya lets out a sigh. "I just lost your mother. I …I was breaking apart Dava. I lost her and I was so afraid I was going to lose you too. Akira happened to be here."

"Happened to be here? Come on Dad."

Valya wipes at her cheek. "It's true. What you didn't see was Shepard was here as well as Arelia and Akira. All three of them took turns staying with me so that I wouldn't be alone. It just so happens that on that night, the night you slipped the hospital staff you saw me and Akira. Nothing is going on between us. I did not…" Valya shakes her head, "I was not unfaithful Dava, you have to believe me. I was not unfaithful to your mother. I know how much I hurt her and how much I hurt you. I wouldn't do that to you again."

After a few minutes Dava says in a calm voice, "I see how you look at her Dad."

Valya slumps down in her chair again as she lets out a long breath.

"You have feelings for her don't you?"

Valya is surprised at how calm her daughter is. She figured she would be yelling at her. "I…I honestly don't know Dava." She looks up her daughter, "I honestly don't know."

Dava walks over and sits on the couch across from her father. "I believe you."

Valya looks at her with a questioning look.

"I believe you did not cheat on Mom again. I know Shadow said things to me that weren't true. She had a way of using the truth for her own purposes. Twisting it for her pleasure." Dava averts her eyes.

Valya stands and sits next to her daughter on the couch. She takes her hand. "I cannot believe how mature and grown up you have become."

"The commandos have really helped me Dad. I need to do this. I hope you will someday understand that."

"I do…I do honey. I understand. And I'm sorry that you didn't feel comfortable telling me this sooner." Valya squeezes her daughter's hand. "I …I am going to miss you. I am going to really, really miss you." She places her arm around her daughter's shoulders. "I love you Dava that will never change not ever."