"What do you mean?"
"Duty. All my life, I have done what needs to be done. Never what I wanted to do. There has only been one thing that I have made my own choice on. One thing I wanted that I thought I could never have."
"What?"
She just looks at me.
"What?"
"Work it out, Steve."
And then it clicks.
"Me…?"
She nods softly.
"You."
"Only me?"
"You have been the only person I would leave a war to save, the only person whose life I would put against two, three, a thousand others. Every other person I've ever met, no matter how much I care about, I would leave behind if I had to. I could leave Logan to a painful death if it would save even three other lives. But you? I would willingly allow the world to die to keep you alive."
"Don't ever do that 'Tana."
She gives me a look.
"I wouldn't Steve. Frankly, I think you'd probably hate me forever if I let one other person die because of my… What was the word Athena used? Ah yes. My infatuation with you."
"Athena? Hercules's sister?"
"Yes."
Then something else permeates my brain.
"One other? 'Tana?"
She hangs her head.
"I was watching you when you…fell into the sea. I knew it would happen and I went. Just to say goodbye. I was tempted… just to throw everything to the wind and catch you. But I didn't. I returned back to Haven. And they were all dead."
I grab her hands.
"All of them? Max?"
"I thought Max was dead. My house fell in when he was still there. I killed every last one of those murdering pigs and I made their leader kneel at my feet and beg and grovel and scream for mercy. Then I killed him. And then I buried my people and tried to dig through the wreckage. I found a body in the house and buried it under Max's name. Turns out it was a Nazi who'd been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Burnt to death. If I'd dug just a few feet more, I'd have found Max…"
"You've met him since then haven't you?"
She just nods and refuses to say another word. The image inducer flickers back on and the dark haired woman appears.
"Look 'Tana, I understand if you don't want to go out…"
She shrugs.
"You choose. I don't mind."
"She was your friend."
"And she threatened you! Do you not understand? I've lived my entire life alone! I have never loved! Oh, I cared for Logan and Max, but not in that way! I have lived with friends, but none of them truly know me! And I'm trying to maybe just change that!"
Then there's a knock on the door.
"Steve, I didn't hear you come in. Are you alright?"
"I'm fine Miss Kapplebaum!"
"Is someone in there with you?"
I open the door and smile at the old woman.
"Anna, meet Etana."
Etana stands up and dips her head in the deferent gesture I know is her trying to stop herself bowing.
"A pleasure to meet you Ma'am."
Anna looks charmed and then notices the Star of David pendant that I know Etana is actually wearing.
"Oh, you are like me!"
Etana smiles.
"You are…German?"
"Yes."
"I am sorry."
I understand what she's talking about. And Anna does as well.
"Yes. You have heard much about it?"
"Of course. I lost many people."
"You cannot be older than thirty!"
Etana laughs a soft, slightly bitter laugh.
"I know."
Anna slips up her sleeve to reveal the tattoo.
"I would have died in the camps if it wasn't for Captain America. And the Angel."
I feel I have to ask.
"The Angel?"
"Oh, I suppose you'll think I was mad now. But the Angel saved my life so many times. We all knew about her. Walls were nothing to her. We had so many stories about her. I loved the one that she was the Half-Fallen…"
"Half-Fallen?"
Etana is being quite quiet. Now it's time to see if my suspicion is right.
"We decided that she was one of the angelic host who refused to take a side in the battle between God and Satan. And because of that, she was cast out of Heaven but not sent to Hell. So she wanders the Earth, helping people in the attempt to return back to Heaven. Moonshine I know, but we made up the stories just to explain her. Oh, she was beautiful. As dark as midnight, with these huge wings and silver eyes and hair. She had this velvet fur and a tail that I saw her use as a hand."
Yep, definitely Etana.
"Oh, the stories we used to tell about her. She spoke to me once. A guard was threatening me and she just appeared behind him and held a knife to his throat. And she just looked at me and said-"
"If you want this dog dead, all you have to do is say the word."
Anna's mouth drops open. Etana is standing by the window, head downcast, as if she didn't realize what she said.
"You know of the Angel?"
"I can tell you what happened to her later."
"Tell me."
"She fell in love with someone totally unsuitable, someone who was doomed to be sent away from her. And she fell in love with him anyway. Went to see her love fall. And when she got back, the people she'd sworn to protect had been massacred. She grew to hate herself. Then she met a man, just as good as her first love and found it in her heart to love again. Fell ill with a terrible disease and tried to heal the world. Survived and was able to be with the man she loved."
"How do you know this?"
She turns, her eyes sparkling in the dying sun.
"Because I do."
I check my watch.
"Tana, did you want to go to the show? It's just its starting in an hour and we need to be there."
She nods absentmindedly.
"Yes…"
Her fingers trace down the glass and she walks over to me.
"Shall we walk?"
I nod and we start down the stairs, saying goodbye to Anna as we go.
Etana seems…distracted through the entire performance and I know she's thinking about the past.
"Etana?"
"I'm fine Steve. Just a little…thoughtful."
"About what?"
"About… Steve, I've just realised something."
"What?"
"The Shadow has to die."
"What…?!"
"The Shadow has to die. So Etana can finally live."
And then I realise. For Etana to properly be with me, the Shadow, or rather the principles on which she based her life, has to be destroyed. She can't be in a relationship and be the Shadow at the same time. It's like being hot and cold, being liquid and solid. As Shadow everything is justice first, then duty, then honour and finally personal feelings. Which means if she had to, she would leave me without one look back. No matter how much it would hurt her. She'd just walk away. That's what made her tell me we couldn't be together. And now she's just Etana. Shadow is gone.
"You mean that?"
She nods.
"I think I'll drop the Justice's part of my title. Just Shadow. Not the Shadow. No more Justice's Shadow. Just…Shadow."
"So then Just Shadow, are we going to be serious all night or are we going to a comedy show?"
She smiles and nods.
"I'll get us there."
