Chapter 12
Aftershocks
She didn't go home.
Maybe that made her a fool or an idiot, but she was doing her best not to run into her mother. She would pay the price for that soon enough.
Instead, Jared brought Kim and her home to Kim's parents, and Kim spun a tale about Jacob Black's motorcycle accident that thankfully wasn't as bad as first thought and Hannah stared emptily around the room and then crashed in Kim's best as soon as possible.
At least the pain in her chest subsided slightly…no longer feeling like she was being ripped apart. That was something.
But that didn't help with the rest of…everything.
"I think I owe you an explanation," Hannah finally said quietly, just as Kim slipped into the bed next to her, turning so that she could look at her best friend.
They had done this so often that it had become second nature to them…the two of them quietly chatting to each other when the house became quiet around them. It wasn't…anything that was out of the usual.
But now…
"You don't…Hannah," Kim said softly. "You don't owe me anything." She kinda did.
"It's…You are my best friend," Hannah whispered. "And this wasn't because I didn't trust you, because I do… I just didn't want you to think that I am insane."
"You aren't insane," Kim said immediately. "At least not any more than usual."
Hannah couldn't help but laugh weakly at that.
"Promise me that it's not going to change anything," Hannah finally whispered desperately. "I just…"
"It's not going to change. I swear," Kim promised her fiercely. "You are my best friend. Even when you confess that you murdered somebody I'll think you had a very good reason for that. Pinky Promise." She held out her hand for Hannah who slipped her own pinky around it and then held onto Kim's hand tightly.
"I can't see the future. Regardless of how much people think I can," Hannah said softly. "I just…I have feelings."
"What kind of feelings?" Kim wondered, immediately the smart, curious girl coming through that she was. "What kind of feelings, Han?"
"The kind of feelings that something is going to go very wrong when I don't do something," Hannah explained. "Sometimes I just know things as well, but that's rarer. That's how I knew the Embry thing…"
"He's your half brother," Kim murmured. "How do you feel about that?"
"It doesn't change anything," Hannah shook her head. "I am not even surprised. I just hope that he is the only other kid that my sperm donor fathered. Could you imagine? What if he fathered a son somewhere in the US and that kid comes across a vampire?"
"That probably wouldn't end well," Kim said with a grimace. "So you just know things. That's not that weird." Kim was trying to be supportive.
"I knew that Jared was going to imprint on you before it happened. That's why I switched seats," Hannah blurted out. Kim just stared at her.
"Oh, that's so sweet," Kim breathed out. "Thank you so much, Han."
The one good things that she had managed.
"And I knew that Emily was going to get hurt," Hannah admitted. "I tried to change it. I…There was this one version that could happen…that would mean that Sammy would throw himself down a cliff and die… I managed to rule that out but I just made it so much worse." She couldn't keep the self loathing out of her voice at that. This wasn't what she had wanted. That was the last things that she wanted.
"How much worse?" Kim asked her softly and Hannah just closed her eyes.
"She lost the eye because of me," Hannah whispered.
"Fuck," Kim cursed. "Does she know?"
"Yeah, I told her and Sammy. Em said it wasn't my fault but…but it was," Hannah whispered. "I changed it so that it happened. I am the reason why. So it is my fault." It was her fault. Something that she would need to live with for the rest of her life.
"It sounds nice, you know…knowing stuff. But you also have so much responsibility," Hannah whispered, the words leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. "I try to do the best with the information I have. But it's not… It's not foolproof. That just showed that."
And once it happened there was nothing that she could do to change it. Nothing at all. And that…that was terrifying.
"I am sorry." Kim whispered. "This isn't something you should need to worry about."
"Your boyfriend changes into a furry beast and hunts vampires," Hannah said with a snort. "You know, they probably have the worse job."
"What's wrong with a normal life?" Kim quipped and Hannah couldn't help but laugh in dark amusement.
"You aren't insane," Kim promised her fiercely. "Jared has a furry little problem and you are…well, you could make a guest appearance on That's so Raven."
"I also sometimes have long conversations with our dead ancestors in my dreams," Hannah added with a sigh. "Just because knowing stuff isn't weird enough."
Just saying it…not needing to keep it all a secret from Kim anymore…that was…that felt….good.
No more secrets.
And her best friend wasn't even angry at her for keeping that secret, even when Kim would have every right to that. It was just…
"Wow," Kim drawled. "So I am super curious now. With whom did you talk?"
"Granny. She's my favorite," Hannah said quietly. "But she hasn't show up in a few weeks…or months. Not ever since the whole…thing happened. Ephraim Black shows up sometimes and complains about his grandson. Taha Aki, who is annoying…"
Kim giggled at that. "Just you could call one of our most distinguished chiefs annoying," she teased Hannah, who just sighed.
"Yeah," Hannah said quietly. "Sometimes I don't know the ones that show up. A young woman showed up a few days ago but I have no clue who she was…"
"Didn't you ask her?" Kim wondered and Hannah just snorted.
"Of course, I asked. Sometimes they don't answer," Hannah gave back quietly.
"What about…the one that Old Quil mentioned? Ruth Uley? Do you know anything about her?" Kim wondered and Hannah shrugged.
"I know that she's Levi Uley's younger sister…and that she married Paul's great grandfather… She was actually the one who brought the…shifting thing into the Lahote family," Hannah said quietly. "I know that she…died really young. But other than that…not much." She didn't even knew how she died…and now she was curious. Who could she possibly ask to find that out. Old Quil?
That was also going to be a conversation that she didn't really wanted to have. But she highly doubted that she was going to get around it.
So she would need to talk about being a broken magic 8 ball. She didn't want that.
"Was she the one you were named after?" Kim wondered but Hannah shook her head.
"No, that was Mirabelle…her niece. She died the day I was born," Hannah said quietly. "My grandmother insisted…" Clara Uley had taken care of Mirabelle as the other women had grown older and more and more fragile.
She felt like she didn't know the whole story and that was…She didn't like it.
"Do you think it's a hereditary thing?" Kim wondered. "Like it jumps through the Uley family? Ruth Uley was first, she died and…now it's you?"
"I have no clue," Hannah answered honestly. But maybe she wasn't quite as unique as she thought it was. Maybe it was a gene…just like the ability to shapehift was…maybe it was…
A gift of her family line?"
"We need to know when Ruth Uley did," Kim said and Hannah stared at her.
"Why?"
"Because I wonder if it's like…like the gift always exist. And from the moment one dies, it passes to the next woman in your family," Kim explained.
"And how does that pick the next woman then?" Hannah asked drily. "I like the theory, Kim, but if it likes jumps from one person to the next…then why me and not, I don't know, Aunt Ellen?" An adult would make more sense than a 6 year old, right? "And who had it between Ruth Uley and me?"
"Mirabelle!" Kim exclaimed hushedly and Hannah just stared at her.
"Hear me out. Ruth Uley died young, but she still married Gene Lahote and they had a kid. So she was what? Around 20 maybe?" Kim suggested and Hannah nodded. "And you said Mirabelle was Ruth's niece…"
"The daughter of Caleb, I think. Ruth was Levi Uley's sister, while Mirabelle was Caleb's, so her other's brother, daughter," Hannah filled in the gaps.
"Which makes her Ruth's niece. So she was a generation down from Ruth…a 20 year age gap or something sounds believable," Kim explained. "Ruth dies. Mirabelle is born shortly afterwards or maybe shortly before…But by then the vampires have maybe disappeared? So they don't need somebody else who can see the future…" So the ability slumbered for the next few decades… "And then like 90 years later, Mirabelle dies and you are born…"
"So you think it flips on and off like a light switch?" Hannah asked Kim amused. "Or do you think it works like the wolf thing? Only shows up when vampires are around?"
"I don't know but isn't it fascinating?" Kim asked enthusiastically.
At least Kim had her fun with it.
"I just want it to stop," Hannah whispered. "I just…"
She wanted it all to go back to normal. She didn't want to worry about people she cared about being killed by crazy vampires or other mythical beings…
She didn't want to go back to not talking to Sammy but she wished…she wished all of it was different.
She knew it was usually. She had spent a decade wishing that her mother was different than she was…and Allison Uley had never changed…would never change.
"Hey, it's okay," Kim said immediately. "I am sorry, you know how I get when I get to research something."
"No, you are probably right, it's just…" Hannah assured her, shaking her head. She forced a deep breath into her lungs. "I warned Embry that Victoria was going to escape. She didn't escape. But instead Jacob got hurt," Hannah whispered, closing her eyes as her tears threatened to leak from them and Kim made a pained noise as she pulled her into a tight hug. "I…It doesn't matter what I do, I always manage to hurt people."
"It's not your fault," Kim said sharply. "You do the best you can with the information you are given, Han. What else were you supposed to do? Not tell them that Victoria was going to be there? What would have happened than? Maybe she would have only escaped…or maybe she would have killed Jacob." Hannah couldn't help the pained noise she made at that. "Sorry. At least now that is over and Bella Swan can stay away," Kim mumbled. "It's not about Jacob or you, Hannah, it's also about all the people that were in danger because of that stupid vampire lady…"
That was true. But it was still…Jacob had still gotten so badly hurt…
"I can't believe Bella was dumb enough to try and throw herself off a cliff," Kim said suddenly and Hannah just sighed.
"You should have heard her," Hannah whispered. "It's like she believed that she and her high school boyfriend are modern Romeo and Juliet. I couldn't possible understand what she is feeling. She is the first girl in the history of the world that got dumped. At least in her head. I get that she feels horrible, but it's not like…"
It wasn't like Bella Swan was the only person around here that had problems. And it was't all about her, regardless of what she thought.
But clearly that wasn't something that she actually agreed with.
"Do you think she's actually depressed or is that just a cry for attention?" Kim wondered. "She clearly needs help but it's not like she can go to a self help group with that story. *Hi, my boyfriend is a vampire, wanted to suck my blood but I still dated him and now he has dumped me and I wanna died because I can't live without him?*" It wasn't the kind thing to do but Hannah still started laughing, because this was hilarious.
Kim started giggling as well and finally Hannah just shook her head.
"I hope she is fine," Hannah finally said quietly. "Good Riddance…at least she won't keep hanging out here anymore…"
"Or she'll complain to Jacob about all of us," Kim said with a snort. "I wouldn't put that past her either. Whatever. This was a horrible Spring Break," Kim said with a roll of her eyes and Hannah could just sigh in agreement.
At least…At least it was over now.
It was back to normal the next day. Mostly at least. The news of Jacob Black's motorcycle accident had reached the shop of Kim's parents as Kim and Hannah helped with stocking shelves and generally making themselves useful that morning.
Hannah gladly did that. Mr. and Mrs. Connweller had always been sweet to her. Far sweeter than Hannah deserved and they never said a single thing even when stayed over with Kim during a weeknight. So helping them stock the shelves was the least Hannah could do.
They were shooed out of the shop by Mrs Connweller by the time 11 came around though, both with chocolate bars in tow…and two different scratch cards, courtesy of Cooper, Kim's brother, for Hannah.
Emily was apparently at the Black House so that where thy were gonna go. Hannah could really imagine a better time but maybe…maybe it would be good to see that Jacob was alright.
"You seriously flirt with my brother so you get scratch cards?" Kim asked her with a snort and Hanna just shrugged. It wasn't like she didn't pay for them. She did. Cooper was just over 21 and not 16 as she was. "Good for you," Kim said with a snort.
Hannah hummed, using her bright yellow polished thumbnail to scratch away at the grey residue covering the prizes.
A hundred bucks. Sweet.
She held it out for Kim to take.
"What, Hannah!" Kim cried out incredulously with a laugh, while Hannah already scratched the next one.
"You can keep that one," she said absentmindedly. 500 dollars. That would keep her and her mother fed for a little while.
"How much is the other one worth?" Kim asked her curiously.
"Enough for groceries for the next month or two," Hannah gave back with a shrug. Something for the rainy day fund, if her mother used her wage once again for tequila and picking up men…and not for buying things they needed like food.
It was something, alright.
She knew that Embry was there, seconds before she saw him, but managed to put a smile on her face regardless.
He was her brother. It was…good that it was finally out in the open. Even when she would have wanted it to be found out under very different circumstances.
But that was something that Hannah thought seemingly all the time, so…
"Hey, Embry," she said instead, because she didn't know what else to say. He was…It hadn't changed. Not really. But then it had, because she had put it out into the world and that hadn't been what anybody had expected. Least of all poor Embry…or Sammy either. She hadn't yet talked to him about this, but she knew that that was also going to be a whole conversation that wasn't going to be too pretty.
"Hey," Embry gave back, sounding subdued and Hannah had enough.
She stomped her way towards him and then hugged him tightly, which seemed to surprise him.
"Shut up and hug me back," she demanded drily, making him choke out a laugh, but do as she asked. He was warm and solid and reminded her so much of Sammy in that moment.
"I can go?" Kim asked hesitantly but Embry shook his head as he let go off her and she stepped back.
"It's fine, Kim," he waved her off. "You'll get to hear it eventually." He turned to look at Hannah and she met his gaze. For once she mustered him and tried to pick out the features of his face that looked like she did.
They didn't have the same hair or the same eyes…whereas hers was curly and dark brown more than black, his was pitch black and straight…where her eyes were a lighter brown and round, his were almond shaped and darker…but maybe there was something in the shape of his eyebrows…or the way his nose narrowed just like hers, right at the tip…maybe there was something in there that they shared.
"I…I talked with my mom," Embry said quietly. "She said it was…true what you said. But she didn't know he was married, otherwise she wouldn't have…" he broke off.
"Embry," Hannah said quietly. "You don't need to apologize for our father," she told him drily. "Don't even get started with it, because then you are going to spend the next decade doing nothing more than that. I don't give your mother the fault for anything."
Tiffany Call had been young and maybe stupid…or maybe not stupid at all. But Hannah didn't think for one moment that the women had been out to destroy a family…especially as there wasn't really a family left to destroy at that point. Hannah knew very well that she hadn't been planned. She had been another accidental pregnancy after her parents hadn't wanted another kid after the first…after her mother had fallen pregnant with Sam while being a Senior in High School.
"If somebody gives her the fault then that's Allison, but quite frankly, she's…just don't care what she thinks about anything," Hannah said drily.
That's what Hannah tried at least.
"Was he really that bad?" Embry finally asked softly. "Mom said he was…charming."
"He could be charming," Hannah agreed. "He could be a loving father. And then you dropped the switch and he was a monster." That's what alcohol did to people. "He hit our mother. He hit Sammy…He tried hitting me once. Sammy got between us." Hannah couldn't help but shudder as she thought about that. He had…that wasn't something she ever thought she would forget.
"He did?" Embry asked quietly and she just nodded.
"The first time I…had a feeling about anything…I knew which scratchcard to pick so that he would never come back home," Hannah admitted quietly. "I got rid of him."
"You got rid of him," Embry repeated.
"Yes," Hannah agreed. "I did. He won 50.000 dollars…and off he went."
"Do you think he's dead?" Embry asked her curiously and Hannah just shrugged.
"He had a thing for cigars and alcohol, so who knows," she admitted. "I am okay if I never see him again."
Embry looked shocked at that. "I am sorry. I just have terrible memories of him, but you don't have any at all," Hannah said with a sigh. "It's just…"
"No, but I…I do have a pretty awesome Mom," Embry told her with a small smile. He did have that. "And now that she knows the truth…the whole truth, it all became so much easier…Thank you for that. "If you hadn't…They listened to you. Without you there my mom still wouldn't know…and my best friend would probably be dead."
Hannah just nodded, but let Embry pull her into his side for another hug.
"How is he doing?" She asked Embry quietly. She didn't need to spell it out.
"I don't know, but we are going there so we'll know soon enough…" Embry answered. "I haven't heard anything alarming so…"
So Jacob Black was probably fine.
"And Harry and Seth?" Hannah asked, meeting Kim's worried gaze.
"Harry is pulling through…Seth is still stuck in wolf form," Embry answered with a sigh. "It's gonna take a little while longer, but maybe if we get news that his father is awake, he'll…manage to calm down enough to shift back on his own."
