Chapter 3- It Was a Gender
Final chapter, let's gooooo! This is the chapter about gender identity! Again, apologies if I did this wrong- just like the last chapter, this isn't my experience. I decided that what would work best with the format would be someone being either AFAB (assigned female at birth) but identifying as male, or AMAB (assigned male at birth) but identifying as female. As you'll probably be able to guess, for this, I went with the latter, as is the case in one of my headcanons. I am fully aware that there are nonbinary people; I just didn't think this story really was the right place to talk about being nonbinary. I promise, though, at some point, I WILL write a story about someone being nonbinary!
Another thing- this particular country is AMAB. I'll let you use your imagination on exactly what "birth" looks like for a nation. Not applicable to this story, but I do have stories in mind where nation-children will be born the "human" way… you'll see what I mean when I publish them.
At this point, you should know that all the money I'm making at my job will not be enough for me to buy ownership of Hetalia or the song (probably should save it so I can retire!). All rights belong to their respective owners. See chapter 1 for citations.
Enjoy!
Chapter 3- It Was a Gender
Poland was afraid to come out; as nervous as a Pole could be! Poland was afraid to come out, as Poland didn't want anyone to see who Poland really was.
What was Poland hiding?
Poland was hiding her gender identity, which she had just figured out today! Although Poland was assigned the sex of male at a country's version of birth (whatever that may be), and was treated like a guy her whole life, that is never how she identified; she always identified as female. However, she was really scared of coming out, as she didn't know if she'd be accepted or how she'd be treated, not to mention whether or not correct pronouns and the human name she chose will be used by others! So she decided to keep her identity a secret.
What next?
Poland was afraid to announce to others that she wants to use she/her pronouns, so she kept insisting that people use he/him. She lay down in her bed, repeating "I'm Poland, and I use she/her pronouns" to herself over and over, but that did not give her the courage to actually say it to someone else. She was terrified that people would not use the correct pronouns, so she kept insisting that people use her old pronouns.
Why was she doing this?
She was doing this because she was afraid that nobody would accept her true gender! Part of it may have been her fears that people will forget, but more than that, she was worried about being treated as an outcast or being mocked. Since society considers it to be the norm that your gender identity be the same as the sex that was assigned to you at birth, and if you're not cisgender, words simply cannot describe how terribly you're treated. So Poland decided not to tell anyone that she doesn't identify as male.
What happened next?
Once Poland really came to terms with what her gender means, she was terrified of going out in public. She had no idea how she would live anymore; as scared as she was of showing her true gender, she was also pretty tired of being treated like a guy, namely use of pronouns that don't fit her, as well as, in certain situations, use of her human name, a male name. She thought of just hiding in her house forever, but that wouldn't work in the long run; you can run, but you can't hide. Sooner or later, Poland would have to face society; she was just terrified, and decided to put it off for as long as possible. However, by doing so, she was missing out on a lot of things she needed to do, plus there are things she likes doing, such as hanging out with her best friend Lithuania, that she was avoiding because of the means required to do so.
What was Poland avoiding?
Poland was avoiding showing her gender to the world. Part of the reason for her initial behavioral reaction of avoiding others was the novelty of it; she had just been able to accurately label her gender. She was a trans woman, but terrified of others finding out, so she decided to avoid them.
Poland decided that she was going to hide her gender for as long as possible; however, in the long run, that wouldn't work for her. In order for her to be comfortable in her own skin, Poland would have to come out in some way. But she wasn't going to do that now; that's for later.
And that's it! I just realized that there are some notes that I forgot to put at the end of the sexuality chapter, so I guess I'll do that now. They're pretty similar to the ones I put at the end of the autism chapter, just more tailored to the LGBTQIA+ community (although I do acknowledge that there are many people who are autistic and belong to the LGBTQIA+ community, I myself am one of them!). Basically, I have concerns about the way the country in which I live is treating those people, most notoriously Florida's "Don't Say Gay" bill, as well as taking trans kids away from their families, severe limitations on gender-affirming care (that's an understatement), teachers in some states being required to tell parents of LGBTQIA+ students about their child's identity even if that means that the child is not going to be safe at home, checking student-athletes' genitals to make sure they're on the "right" team… the list goes on. This is not meant to be a political statement, and if you are from or currently live in one of those states, I am so sorry. I'm sure you're just as upset by it as I am, if not more, since you are more directly affected. (Un)fortunately (depending on how you look at it), I live in a state where none of that is happening (at least none that I am aware of), so I think I'd be pretty safe if I disclosed my identity (I'm queer). However, that also means that I have little to no control over what happens in those states; that means I can't make a point of not voting for certain politicians (who shall remain anonymous) because they aren't on the ballot in my state, although I do have some control over what happens at the national level (voting in the presidential election, although the electoral college kind of decreases the amount of power citizens have, and voting for people to serve in Congress). No matter what your political views are, US politics are a mess to say the least, so if you're not from Alfred's country and you're reading this and feeling very confused, I sincerely apologize. I didn't study political science in college nor is politics really something I choose to look at in my free time (only saying what I know from things discussed in my psychology classes as well as stuff on social media), so I don't exactly have an encyclopedic knowledge about how my own country's government works. If you have any questions, I'd be more than happy to answer them, but you might get a better answer from someone else. Just saying.
Back to the social justice issue at hand- please please PLEASE be supportive of LGBTQIA+ friends/family/loved ones/peers. Especially now, they really need it. I know the situation in the US isn't as bad as in some other countries, but I will admit, it's pretty bad (not to invalidate the experiences of anyone from another country, please feel free to share your experiences if comfortable!). One way you can be supportive is simply by educating yourself on what different identities mean. You can do that by doing some independent research, in which case Google and ChatGPT are your best friends, or, better yet, you could even try asking the person about their identity. That way, you have an idea of not only what the identity means about everyone, but how that person experiences it, which could help you empathize with them better. If you choose the latter, make sure to be nonjudgmental.
It is also vital to use everyone's correct pronouns. We all have assumed someone's gender at some point (myself included), but it's best not to. Don't be shy about asking someone what their pronouns are, and whatever they are, be sure to use them! Also, everyone should feel free to display their own pronouns, even if you are cisgender. That way, you can better stand in solidarity with people who do not identify as cisgender.
Also, please do not ask people questions about their genitals or methods of having sex- that is just indecent, and is yet another way of singling out a group of people. Although it is less lewd, it is also important to avoid asking "who's the man" in a same-sex relationship- if you read the first chapter of my other fic "Microaggressions", you'll understand why. Spoiler alert- although the story does mention two men in a relationship, it is also important to avoid asking that question to two women in a relationship.
Finally, make sure to be an active co-conspirator, rather than simply an ally. Allies are people who say that they are passionate about (insert social justice cause) and they may look like they are, but, in reality, don't actually do anything to help. Co-conspirators, on the other hand, stand with those who are oppressed and try to help them by fighting with them. For example, let's say you are passionate about helping the LGBTQIA+ community. If you are simply an ally, you might display pride flags and certain slogans such as "love is love" and "transition to love", and/or even post things on social media about things in the news that concern you and say that you love and support those who are oppressed, but you likely wouldn't actually do anything to solve the problem. On the contrary, as a co-conspirator, you would (if you live in the USA, unfortunately cannot speak for any other country) vote for people who will help fulfill the mission about which you are most passionate, as well as disarm microaggressions. However, it is important to let the voices of the oppressed be heard, too.
I think that's all. Please let me know if I missed anything. When I said that "this isn't my experience", what I meant was that I'm not really "out", so I don't know what coming out is actually like. I imagine that it's different for everyone, but if any of you have come out and would like to tell me about your experience, please feel free! No pressure, though.
Adieu! (Heading to Quebec tomorrow)
