So here it is. The last chapter. Hope you enjoy. Lots of love! Please review if you enjoyed it. :)
Draco Malfoy ran a free hand through her hair. "Come on, I'll send for the nurse to gather your things. There is nothing these muggle doctors can do for you."
"Draco…"
"I know the best healer. He'll have you up on your feet in no time."
"Draco listen..."
"You could stay at the manor. It's not the same gloomy place it used to be." He lies between his teeth.
"God damnit, Draco! Just listen to me." It is enough to snap him out of his reverie. He turns to look at her, his eyebrows knitted with confusion.
"I don't want to go back. I can't. I just can't keep doing this."
"What do you mean? I don't understand the meaning of this."
"Going around hurting the people I love. I can't keep doing this to Ron, and I sure as hell can't keep doing this to you."
He stares at her, a silent plea in his sad gray eyes.
"I've hurt you more than I could ever repent for. More than I could ever beg your forgiveness for. I want you to leave today, and never look back."
She looks like a crazed woman in that moment, sweat beading above her brow, and an eager expression on her face.
"Don't you ever say something like that again, witch."
He grounds the words out, almost as if saying them poisons his insides. In a moment he is beside her again. And in a flash, he pulls her into a gentle embrace.
"Look at me, Draco, if you have any love for me, you'll leave. You'll walk out that door and forget you ever knew a Hermione Granger."
He scoffs. "How do you just walk into my life, and make an honest man out of me, expecting me to just leave? I wish I could. I really fucking wish I could. Sometimes I wish I had never met you."
"Go and find yourself a beautiful purebred witch.." She means the words. She wants him to settle down, and have children, and be happy. Eventhough deep in her soul she knows neither of them could ever find happiness now.
"You know what I wish?"
He completely ignores her half uttered proposition with a wave of his hand.
"I wish I never saw you on that train with your insufferable brown bush you called hair. I wish you never looked at me with your big doe eyes. I wish you never smiled at me. Hell, I wish I never smiled back."
He runs a shaky hand through his hair, pausing momentarily.
"I wish I never tasted your God forsaken skin. You knew what you were doing from the beginning, you clever wench."
He chuckles coldly, the sound falling silently. She tries to see the familiarity in his eyes, but they are downcast, fixed on her ring finger.
"You should never have trusted me Granger. You should never have tried to extend your hand in charity. All you Gryffindors are the same. Trying to fix everything broken. You should have just let me rot; instead you had to go and try to save my soul."
She can't try to be strong for him. And he doesn't pretend to be unbroken for her either.
She looks at him through watery eyes, and a scowl, because she doesn't know how she feels. She can't differentiate between the anger and the pain, and the guilt. Somehow they are all just one emotion, and that makes it all the worse.
"Look at me now. My soul is completely corrupted." The words are a ragged whisper. He clenches his jaw, his fists mirroring the action.
"Do you think I asked for this, you selfish bastard? You think I asked to fall in love with the man that made my school years some of the most painful and blissful at the same time?
He whirls around, and in two steps he is standing over her again.
"Then why did you? You know... if you weren't in that hospital bed, I would slam you against the wall and dig my fingers into your skin. Maybe then I would be able to resist you... if you were covered in bruises.
His forehead gently meets her own. "I wish I could fucking quit you."
With a deep breath she pushes him away for the second time that day. It had been far too long. Ten years.
For ten years they had not been able to smile quiet reassurances. For ten years they had not been able to hold eachother in warm embrace. For ten years. 10 excruciating, exasperating, utterly miserable years they had been walking shells of their former selves.
"Now listen to me, I have hurt Ron enough. I refuse to let you back into my life. I'm gonna stay here and continue my treatment!"
It hurts her more than hell to say it, but she needs him to get his life together, just as she needs to make amends with her own.
"I wish I could bunch that hospital gown around your waist and fuck you until I was over my obsession with you. FUCK!" He growls the word like the primal beast he has transformed into before her eyes.
"Good bye, Granger."
"Merlin make her well again, and I promise you, I will never see her. Just make her well." He speaks the words inwardly, because childishly, he believes that his wish will not come true if someone else hears.
He knows this feeling all too well, when you love someone enough to let them completely inside, and they find the abyss, because it looks just like their own.
Then out of the blue, they pull away. They board up their windows and choose a new name.
You rid yourself of their photos because those are easy.
You can actually feel them.
Destroy them physically.
But no matter how hard you try, their memory is branded into your mind, so whenever you close your eyes, you see them.
You can't comfort them when they cry. You can't help them forget their fear. The thing is, you can't even help them forget you.
Not until you disappear completely.
And that's just what he did.
Let me know how you guys liked the story! I'm kinda iffy about this last chapter though. Should I leave it here, or write one last chapter? PS- I have reread the story, and noticed the grammatical errors. I'll be fixing them tonight. I usually read through all my stories several times, but I haven't really had the time with this one. I will make amends though, I promise. Believe me, I hate spelling mistakes just as much as the next guy. Haha Also, please give 'When the Swans Come,' a chance. It was one of my favorites to write. Lots of love!
