This Love is Forever
"I can stay another day or two," Ben said as they drove to the airport with Tuck asleep in the backseat.
"Not necessary."
"Promise me," he said looking over at her.
Miranda kept her eyes on the road until they came to a red light. "I promise."
He touched her chin, "Okay."
At the airport, Ben got out and pulled his bags from the trunk. "This car needs to move immediately," one of the workers from the airport said to them.
"Mmmhmm, right away," Miranda said giving the man a look. Ben smirked. He knew that look. "Give me a hug, husband!"
He wrapped his arms around her, taking in her scent and wanting to remember this moment until the next time he saw her. "I'm going to miss you."
"Yeah, yeah."
"You know what? Fine. I'm leaving." Ben turned and grabbed the handle of his bag. He felt Miranda touch his waist and he smiled. "Unh-huh. Kiss me." He put his face an inch from hers and waited for her to close the gap. She closed her eyes and pressed her lips against his and his body shook slightly. He eased his tongue into her mouth and rubbed her back. When she pulled away, a few tears were rolling down her face. "It's okay. I'll be back."
"I miss you already, babe," she said as he wiped away her tears. He didn't like when she cried, although he appreciated that she was doing it because she didn't want him to leave. He didn't want to either, but L.A. was calling him. His dream was waiting. He just hoped that his wife would be good without him. He wouldn't bug her though; he'd let her do her own thing—only interfering if he needed to.
"I miss you, too." They kissed again. "Tell little man that I'll call him and that I love him. And I will be back for Halloween."
"Your favorite holiday." Miranda smiled widely. Ben's heart skipped. She had an effect on him and he'd never deny it.
"Okay, I have to go." She stood there and pouted a little and he smiled. "You have to get in the car and go or I won't get on the plane." They held each other, swaying on the sidewalk for a few seconds before she pulled away without looking back. He appreciated that. He fell asleep almost immediately as he made his way back to his second home. He called Miranda as soon as he walked into his empty and chilly apartment. The squeaky voice of Tuck greeted him as the ringing stopped. "Hey, Ben!"
"Tuck! My guy!" Ben said with a bright smile. He sat on his sofa. The boy giggled and said something incomprehensible, speaking quickly. His stepfather pretended to keep up while only understanding every other thought or question.
"Mommy wants to talk to you," Tuck said.
"Okay. I'll talk to you soon, Tuck," Ben replied sincerely. "I love you."
"I love you, too," Tuck said. Ben heard the phone exchange hands.
"Hello?" Miranda answered.
Ben sank deeper into his sofa. "Hi, baby."
The way he was missing her, most would never know that he'd left home only hours before. He imagined that if he was back at home, they would be cuddled up in front of the TV with Tuck playing with his toys next to them. A wave of sadness hit him. "Ben? Did you hear me?"
"No, not at all," he admitted. "What did you say?"
"I said that it was good to have you home for a while and not just for a rushed trip." Her voice was soft.
"Yeah, the circumstances weren't ideal, but I was reminded of the pros of being in Seattle."
"Like what?"
"Seeing you every day, playing with Tuck, holding you, kissing your neck—"
"Slow your roll. My child is right beside me," Miranda said with a loud laugh. They stayed on the phone for a long time. It was the moments like this when being away from his wife and kid wasn't so bad. They loved him and were only a phone call away. Ben settled into the left side of the bed, leaving the right side unoccupied. "You need to go to sleep."
"I know, but I love talking to you."
"I also need you to love being a surgeon."
"I do."
"Not as much as you love me, right?"
"There's no competition. I adore you." He imagined her blushing hard.
"I adore you, too," she said. "Go to bed."
"Yes, ma'am." After they dismissed the call, Ben stayed up, watching the TV screen, not processing anything. Miranda wasn't usually wrong about certain things, but she was wrong that he would resent her if he moved back home. He wouldn't. He could find a closer residency; he could even go back to Anesthesiology—as long as his family was fine. It was a sacrifice he was willing to make; especially after a traumatic incident like the one that Miranda had gone through. He opened his laptop to compose a new email. He addressed it to the director of UCLA's residency program. Then, he paused. Miranda seemed better, a lot better. Maybe she didn't need him to be there. Maybe his presence was just an added bonus to the healing process. The blinking line on the screen waited for his next move. He pulled his lips in. He could have almost believed that except that she'd kept her pain and feelings inside until he'd shown up. And there was so much healing to do. She would struggle and he needed to be there to help her; to remind her that she wasn't alone. Ben scratched his beard and knew that the one person he was doing it for would be pissed. She wouldn't understand. But this decision didn't require her to. He just needed her support, the same support that he was willing to give her. He took a deep breath and started the short email to the director, requesting an immediate meeting, typing slowly and deliberately, thinking about the consequences of what he was doing. The conversation that he was soon to have was going to change the course of his entire career. But it was worth it. Miranda Bailey was so worth it. He just hoped that she would have faith in him and not be completely disappointed. He loved being in L.A. becoming a surgeon, but he would never forgive himself if he prioritized it over his family. They were so important to him; so he would do this and she wouldn't appreciate it right away, but she would get it… eventually. And he could always continue becoming a surgeon, but if he screwed up his marriage, there was no coming back from that. The only way they could survive what was on the horizon is if they were together. She needed him and though it didn't seem like it, he needed her as well. Their love was forever. He smiled at the thought. "Send."
-The End
