~ Lucy ~

My feet hurt. I know that is an utterly ridiculous thing to be complaining about when I face mortal danger on a weekly if not daily basis but its the truth. I could not even begin to guess how long I have been walking, not to mention how far. For the first week of my self imposed mission I had used a potion that I had found at a magic shop back in Magnolia to mask my scent so that the dragon slayers could not use their utterly ridiculous sense of smell to track me, though looking back I can remember still holding out hope they would come after me. Pathetic Lucy. Even knowing how they feel and even with all my determination to change myself for a while I was still hoping they would track me down and drag me back to tell how much they missed me. Over time I had finally snapped myself out of that thought process, knowing full well I had taken measures to insure they couldn't find me until I was ready to be found.

Shaking out shaggy blonde hair that had lightened considerably from the months of constant sunlight I banish the train of thought. I am not the same Lucy I was then. I am stronger. I no longer want nor need to be rescued. Granted I will probably never be on par with my Nakama strength wise, seeings as they were probably some of the strongest mages in all of Earthland, but I am a hell of a lot closer then I have ever been before. Back to my aching feet though, you may be asking yourself why I haven't just called Horologim to carry me as I would have in the past. Well...funny story actually...I kinds, sorta...left my keys behind. I need to make this journey on my own, I cant keep relying on my spirits or my teammates to protect me. I love my spirits and they are as much a family to me as my FairyTail Nakama; but I want to prove that I am capable and earn all of their respect. I want to be more then weak little Lucy. While the past few months have been hard, harder then I ever could have imagined, I feel like I have succeeded. Don't get me wrong, I'm not there yet. But I'm on my way. I am now at least worthy of the title FairyTail mage. I can fight. I can survive.

Adjusting the pack straps higher onto my shoulders I continue my walk along the overgrown path headed back into the denser parts of the Fiore wilderness. I had unintentionally come too close to town and backtracking now seemed like my best bet to stay hidden. The last thing I needed was to run into someone, friend or foe alike, while this weak and hungry. It had been at least two days since I had a proper meal, hunting not being my strongest skill even after all these months. Ignoring the grumbling in my gut for the moment I scan my surroundings, the bright lime and emerald green of the leaves flashing in the sunlight. You would think that after all this time the trees would begin to blur together, but they dont. The beauty of this wild world will never cease to amaze me. Again my mind wanders against my better judgement to remind me of the man who represent the very meaning of the world wild, but I attempt to slam that door shut once again. It is not an easy feat. "Do you miss me? I miss you...Natsu."

~ Natsu ~

"Shut the fuck up Grey." I know the words are more growl then anything but I cannot even begin to care. In a few days the year anniversary will pass. A whole fucking year without her. Despair grips me and I can feel the rage bubbling in my gut, ever ready to burst and consume me in its dark flames. The dragon still beasts at my subconscious mind, driving me to DO SOMETHING. But there isn't anything I can do. We have searched all over Earthland for Lucy. We have waited for her return. We still wait, drowning in our combined sadness and despair. The guild hasn't been the place of joy it always was since she had been gone. The thought pops the bubble of rage in my gut. Grey and Erza both flinch as my footsteps come to a sudden halt, neither breaking the tense silence that seems to be our constant companion now. Turning my face from their pitious expressions I roar my frustrations to the heavens, a dim hope that somehow those starts that Lucy so loved will hear my anguish and take pity on me. The sound echoes through the trees surrounding the path we follow, scattering the few small animals in the general area. Tense minutes follow my outburst before I feel a tentative hand on my shoulder and turn my gaze to meet startling ice blue. I knew my skin burned, my rage fueling the heat, but Grey doesn't flinch at the temperature.

"Natsu...the mission. We have to keep going."

"I know you miss her. We all do. But we are on a time limit and we must carry on to town. It is only another hours walk at most." Erzas steely voice has little effect at calming me as it would have in years past. But, wordlessly, I begin moving again. The money, that's all that matters for now. I will pay her damn rent even if it kills me. Which it very well might considering the state of my fucking sanity. But I will keep it together for now.

The rest of the trip follows the same pattern as all the others have lately, the three of us silent and tense until they finally break through the last of the dense foliage and spy the town gates looming ahead. This small town resides remote in some of the most dangerous wilderness in Fiore and often called upon Guilds to help clear monsters or deal with some of the more monumental tasks required in the area. Today we were here to deal with a pack of wolves that was terrorizing the area, child's play for the team but urgent and paying a good sum. The client was actually staying in another town for fear of the 'demonic' beasts so they had to go out of the way to see him before coming here. Coward. Feeling restless in the open I again freeze on the path, Erza and Grey following suit before turning to me, a question clear on the faces.

"We should split off here, hunt down tracks during the day when they are less active." My voice almost sounds rusty, which seems fitting considering I hardly spoke anymore other then to snap or roar, something that I knew I needed to work on but that was easier said then done. Erza looked like she wanted to argue with me but a quick hand motion from Grey had her eyes hardening before she gives me a small nod and continues on down the path. Grey shoots me a worried glance before following, leaving me alone at the edge of the forest. The darkness within the trees seem to call to me and I make a hasty retreat into its cool shadows, my eyes easily adjusting thanks to my parentage. The dragon traits never seem far from the surface now. Gajeel claims its the loss of my mate that has caused it to go haywire, not that I minded anyways. If I was going crazy anyway I might as well take advantage of any perks.

I must have been walking for hours before I realized the sky had darkened into slashes of brillinat purples and reds. Damn. No way would I make it back to town before dark covered the land. Looks like I'm roughing it tonight. Growling in irritation I take a huge breath to steady myself before I lose it again. Anything and everything sets me off nowadays and I was getting fairly good at semi handling the rage ever present in my mind by breathing or roaring it out of my system. As the rapidly cooling air settles in my lungs my inner dragon perks up in interest, the natural dragonic curiosity awoken by a faint smell on the wind. Smoke.