Chapter 19

It had been nearly two weeks since the world learned about Iron Man and still JC had not yet woken up. The doctors kept assuring Tony that she was making good progress, that any day now they would be able to start reversing the anesthesia and she would wake up. He refused to believe it until he saw it. Until then, he kept himself busy with upgrading his armor. He had wanted to keep Darren far away from it, but since the boy was now taking up residence in the mansion, it was next to impossible to keep him out of the garage. On a positive note, it gave them something to bond over. Darren was keen to learn engineering and coding, and Tony found it diverting teaching the kid. He was bright and intuitive, picking up things quickly and adding his own spin on things. However, all that only came after homework was finished.

"You realize I could do Algebra 2 in my sleep, right? It's pretty much child's play compared to what we've been working on," Darren griped as he sat at a desk working on his math.

"Tell you what: when you invent something that actually allows you to do homework while you sleep, then we can talk about skipping it," Tony said as he finished up the schematics for implementing a more efficient means of power conduction for the suit.

"I'm pretty sure there's probably some terrible, B-rated sci-fi film out there that tries something like that and the whole world goes into an apocalypse or something. Bad idea, Tony."

Tony smirked. "Well then, it looks like Algebra 2 is your new best friend. Besides, if you did invent something like that, I'm sure every student from middle school to college level would absolutely hate you."

"I'll just tell them it was all your idea."

"Ha, like anyone would believe it." Shutting down his work station, Tony rolled his chair over to Darren's desk. "How much more do you have?"

"Just finished the last one," Darren said as he filled in several numbers and packed away the papers. "So, what are we gonna work on?"

"Actually, there's something I wanted to discuss with you, and it's a pretty big deal."

Darren leaned back in his chair folding his hands over his chest. "Uh oh, Tony has his serious face on. The last time you said something like that, you were scolding me on my laundry habits."

"Hey, first," Tony started, holding up a finger, "that was a necessity. I'm pretty sure there was a biohazard trying to take root in there. And second, contrary to popular belief, grown men do their own laundry."

"I thought Pepper did your laundry."

"Occasionally picking up dry-cleaning is not doing laundry. There is a difference. And anyway, we are getting way off subject here. Look, I know we haven't talked about it much, but there is a reality we have to face."

Darren's face turned from smiling to solemn as he looked away from Tony. "I thought we agreed we weren't going to talk about that unless we had to. Unless you're telling me something's changed."

"No, nothing's changed, but this is something I've been putting a lot of thought into, and I'd like your opinion on it before I finalize anything."

Darren turned to him with a droll stare. "If you're about to say something stupid like drawing up adoption papers then–"

"Trust me, kid, I wouldn't even dream of it. No, what I had in mind was something a little more appropriate than that. Hypothetical situation: your mom makes a miraculous recovery and wakes up tomorrow morning, except she has severe brain damage and is unable to care for herself. It is a possibility. I won't even consider the worst case scenario, but that is a possibility, too. If either one of those happens, or anywhere in between, I don't want you to put your life on hold. I don't want that for you, and your mom wouldn't want it either."

"What exactly are you getting at?"

"What I am trying to say, and doing a terrible job, is that you will be taken care of. I don't mean adoption or custody or anything like that. Whatever care your mom needs, she'll get it. Whatever it is you want to do with your future, it's yours. You want to go to an Ivy League school, go for it. Community college?" He chewed on the idea for a moment before deciding, "There will be heavy discussion, but if it's what you really want to do, you will have the support you need without the burden of wondering how you're going to get there or wondering if she'll be taken care of."

Darren leaned back in his chair as he mulled over the idea. "So your grand idea is to throw money at it to make a problem go away?"

"What? No! That's not…" Tony sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You're right," he conceded. "It was a terrible idea. Just forget I said anything."

As he tried to roll back to his work station, Darren grabbed a hold of his chair to stop him. "Look, I realize you're not exactly an expert on this whole being a responsible adult thing; and you're definitely not parenting material. But I do appreciate what you're attempting to do. I just can't think about that stuff. Feels like if I do, it's like I've already given up on her."

"Being prepared isn't the same as giving up. I promise not to bring it up again unless you want me to, but just so you know, the offer always stands."

"Always?" Darren asked with a cocked brow.

"Think of it like a scholarship. Because I will be honest, I selfishly want you to end up at my company before someone else snatches you up. Most people can't keep up with this stuff at your age, and it only gets better from here."

"Like what?"

"Like this," Tony said, and pulled him over to his work station.


Three days after the doctors had decided to begin reversal of JC's anesthesia, she still had not completely recovered. She had been going in and out of consciousness, even been rather violent when she discovered the tube in her throat. The doctors warned Tony that this kind of behavior was completely normal given her situation, but that hadn't made it easier to watch. He had even told Darren to postpone coming to visit her for the time being. He understood the need for Darren to be there, but his mother shouting expletives as she fought against the medical staff was not something he needed to see.

With Darren at school, Tony spent any available time he could in JC's room. If she was going to wake up at any time, and be even remotely coherent, he didn't want her to be alone. He knew that being in a coma was her worst nightmare, and he hoped that if anything would help ease her mind, it would be a familiar face waiting for her.

While Darren hadn't brought up the subject of accepting his "scholarship" again, Tony was still hammering out the details anyways. He had meant what he said. He wanted Darren to have a bright future, whether Darren liked it or not. As Tony signed the final papers that would made the account official, he set them aside and pulled up his laptop to put the final touches on the new blue prints for the next suit upgrade. Part way through entering in the data, he noticed movement coming from the bed.

Setting the laptop aside, Tony readied himself to hold her down if necessary until one of the nurses could come to assist. He hoped, though, that it wouldn't be necessary.

"JC?" he said gently as he laid a hand on hers.

She mumbled groggily before turning a bleary eyed look at him. "Stark?"

"Hey, sleepy head," he said with a smile. "How are you feeling?"

"Foggy," she answered dazedly. "Where are we?"

She would still be confused, Tony remembered. The important thing was to not correct her; she would only become more confused and agitated. Just go along with anything she said until she had her wits back.

"We're in a S.H.I.E.L.D. facility," he supplied.

JC cussed as she let out a disgusted groan. "Is there a Phil Coulson around? I hate that guy."

Tony couldn't help but chuckle. "Yeah, he's hanging around here somewhere. He comes to check on you regularly."

"Still hate him. Which facility?"

It was an odd question but he didn't hesitate to answer, "We're still in Malibu." It seemed like such an innocent answer, but JC looked utterly baffled.

"Malibu? When did we get back?"

"Get back? What do you…" Tony paused as another thought crossed his mind. "JC, what's the last thing you remember?"

She closed her eyes as she thought hard on the question. Her breathing increased to a near panicked pace. "Guns firing…a fire burning…explosions…Yinsen…Oh, god, Yinsen! They killed Yinsen!" She began thrashing about as tears streamed down her face. "They shot him! God, why did they do it? He was innocent!"

"Nurse!" Tony called out as he tried to keep her from hurting herself. This was not what he had expected. Several nurses and a doctor filed in spouting orders as they pushed him aside and began working on her. Tony stepped out of the room more to catch his breath than to give them space.

He knew she would be out of it for a while, knew that she likely wouldn't remember anything from their fight with Stane, but the first thing she could think of was being back in the desert. He expected something else, anything else. Of all the time they had spent together for nearly a month, he had thought that one of those moments would have been first to come back since they were the most recent. Surely one of those moments would have stood out. But no, they hadn't. Then the worst thought hit him. The doctor said she might have retrograde amnesia, but he never said how much she would forget. She obviously still remembered him, still had some memories of their time in the desert, so she wasn't a complete blank slate, but who was to say she would ever remember anything from the past several weeks? And if she never did, she would never remember how far they had come together. To her, he was still the same man she had met in Japan.

"We've stabilized her for now," the doctor said when he finally emerged from the room. "She'll likely have several more episodes like that in the future before she's finally back to normal. This is to be expected, Mr. Stark. You shouldn't alarm yourself."

"She didn't remember, Doc," Tony said. "She said the last thing she could remember was the day that we escaped from that prison. Not Stane, nothing from the last few weeks, none of that."

"Mr. Stark," the doctor started with that gentle yet chastising voice doctors were so good at, "she is still recovering from the anesthetics."

"And severe head trauma. You said she might not remember some stuff. Is it possible that she could have lost all that time?"

"As I've explained before, some amnesia is to be expected but–"

"Yeah, I know. 'It's to be expected, but it'll come back with time.' You've said it a dozen times. I started doing my own research. There's a good chance that she might never get some of that time back. Right? That she'll never get those weeks back no matter how recovered she is."

The doctor let out a heavy sigh as he adjusted his lab coat. "Yes, Mr. Stark, that is a possibility. Normally, I wouldn't be so frank, but considering who you are, you probably won't mind what I'm about to say. So what if she loses a few weeks? All things considered, she should be dead, or worse, a vegetable. I understand it's not ideal, but given the choice, I would gladly take a few missing weeks. If you'll excuse me, I have other duties to attend to." With that, the doctor stormed off.

Tony stood there unable to fully comprehend this new reality. He thought he was prepared for every possibility, thought he could handle whatever the outcome would be. But what could he do with this? If JC stayed like this, she wouldn't want him to have any part in her life or Darren's. Honestly, he couldn't even blame her for it. He could start over again, prove that he had changed, but what would that accomplish? She would never believe they had spent so much time together, that she had shared things with him she had never told anyone else before. Her husband, her brother, her life. Even if she got a point where she was willing to share those things again with him, it wouldn't be the same. None of it would ever be the same.

Pulling himself together, he went back into the room where JC was now resting comfortably. He sat by her bedside one last time, taking the moment to truly appreciate being with her for the last time.

"You'll probably hate me for this. Actually, you might be happy with what I'm going to do, because you'll probably never remember what we had together. And that's okay, because it's better this way. It's a real second chance for you. A chance to be truly free of me. I've done nothing but bring you and your family pain. I only hope that this can, in some small way, start to make it up to you. I know I can never make it right between us, but this way you and your son can really be safe from me." He laid his hand on hers, wishing it didn't have to be the last time he would ever feel her touch. "I don't know if you can hear me, or understand what I'm saying, but if there's even a small part hearing this, please, whatever you do, don't lock yourself away from the world. Stop trying to hide your pain hoping it'll go away. We both know it won't. I know you can't confide in Darren, but for the love of all that is decent in the world, find someone you can lean on, someone you can tell. Because if you don't, you will never be free of your demons, and I can't bear the thought of you going on living in torment, because…" He wanted to say it, to say those three little words. But he couldn't. Saying them aloud would only make it harder to let her go. He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it. "Goodbye, JC. My guardian angel."


AN: I realize this one is a little bit shorter. However, since the story will soon be coming to a close, the final chapter will be considerably longer to help make up for the shortness. Thanks to those returning, and to those discovering this story for the first time, I hope you have enjoyed it thus far. Stay tuned in the new year for the final chapter!