Chapter 4 – When Time Doesn't Mend, It Breaks

Gabriel fell to his knees, Raphael's arm still gripping him tightly across the chest though he had given up struggling almost the moment his brother held him back. He stared at the place Lucifer had been just a moment before, tears falling slowly down his cheeks.
"Father, please... please bring him back..." he begged weakly.
"I can't," said God.
Gabriel looked up at him, his expression one of betrayed sorrow, almost like a puppy who's been kicked.
"Why?" he sobbed.
"What's done is done, Gabriel," God said.
"But why did you have to cast him out in the first place? We could have reasoned with him!" said Gabriel.
"No, we could not," said God. "Trust me, Michael and I have tried. We have tried to make him see the error in his prideful hate for humanity many times. But it was his lie to you that was the final straw."
Gabriel swallowed hard and stood up, letting Raphael help him to his feet.
"I know this is hard, my son, but please try to understand," God continued gently. "And remember that you have done nothing wrong. You may go."
Gabriel nodded and stared at God for a moment. He wanted nothing more than for his Father to pull him into his powerful arms and comfort him, but God had never shown that sort of affection for his archangels and Gabriel didn't expect him to change that now. So he turned on his heel and trudged home.

He opened the door to find his two little brothers waiting for him. He had barely entered the room when Balthazar walked up to him and gave him a hug.
"We're sorry that we got you in trouble, Gabe," he said, his voice slightly muffled in his brother's shirt.
"No, Balthazar, it's not your fault," said Gabriel gently, crouching down so he was more at the two young angels' level. "And I'm not in trouble."
"Then why was Lucifer angry with you?" Castiel asked.
"Lucifer was wrong," said Gabriel, his tears suddenly returning and choking him.
"What's wrong?" asked Balthazar, alarmed by the archangel's tears.
"Lucifer...is gone. Father sent him out of heaven," Gabriel explained.
"When will he be coming back?" asked Castiel, tilting his head to the side in confusion.
"He's not. He's never coming back," Gabriel said.
Then he completely broke down. He buried his face in his hands, sobbing so hard his entire body shook, right down to the tips of his wings. He felt two pairs of small warm arms wrap around him as Balthazar and Castiel tried their best to comfort him, and he gripped them both close to him as though they would vanish in a burst of light like Lucifer had if he ever let them go.

Years and years went by. As they flew, things in heaven only got worse. Even with Lucifer gone, the angels still fought. Gabriel could hardly bear it. The family that God had created was slowly becoming an army. Things on Earth were bad too. Some of the angels were beginning to wonder if maybe Lucifer had been right about the humans, but none of them dared speak their minds on this after what had happened to the fallen archangel.

Balthazar and Castiel grew up, and grew up well. Gabriel was proud of how well he had raised them, but he was worried for them too. Both had earned respectable positions in a division of heaven's army headed by an angel named Anna. Gabriel only knew who she was because Lucifer had raised her. This made him rather nervous when he heard that his boys had been assigned to her division, but his fears were soon reprieved. Balthazar and Castiel were quick to assure him that Anna had not inherited Lucifer's hatred for humanity and that instead, she was quite interested in it. As much as Gabriel hated that his little brothers were being forced to become soldiers, he was at least glad that their commander was decent.

Time went on and eventually, things got so bad down on Earth that God had to take serious action. He sent Gabriel down as a messenger to a young virgin named Mary to tell her she would be the mother of the Savior. Gabriel was glad of the excuse to visit Earth again for the first time since Lucifer's fall, and to actually see some of humanity this time, even if it was just one girl. But he found Mary's initial disbelief and her faithful acceptance endearing. He knew not all humans were like her, or else the world wouldn't need a savior, but he really hoped that there were plenty of others just as good.

But though the whole Savior business was good news for Earth, it turned out to be quite the opposite for heaven. After Jesus returned to his Father, God disappeared and none of the angels ever heard from him. With an absent father, the fighting got worse and showed no signs of slowing down.

Finally, Gabriel had enough. He loved his family and hated to see them like this. So he made his choice. He decided to leave heaven. It was late at night when he left. Balthazar and Castiel were asleep, in separate beds now that they were grown up, and neither woke as Gabriel looked at them both one last time before silently closing the door behind him. He left a hastily scribbled note for Michael –
"Do not come looking for me. I'm safe. I just had to go. –Gabriel."
– then went out to the clouds. He had already made contact with the man who would be his vessel on Earth and gotten his approval. He took a deep breath and glanced back, knowing this was the last time he would see heaven, maybe forever. He closed his eyes and braced himself, then he descended to Earth.

Gabriel felt an immense heat, then everything was normal. His eyes flew open and he glanced around. He was on Earth. He let his gaze drop and he inspected his vessel. The hands, arms, legs... there was a clear, still pond a few yards off and he rushed to it, staring at his reflection.
"Not bad. Not bad at all," he muttered to himself. "I chose a good vessel."
Gabriel looked around again, taking in his surroundings. Suddenly, he grinned. No one here knew who he was. No one knew his real name. In fact, it was safer that they didn't. He could make an entire life for himself here on Earth, completely separate from his life in heaven, and he could make it exactly as he wanted it to be. No one would expect anything of him. There were no rules. He was free.