Dear Diary,
It's been two weeks since the whole slut incident with Audrey and Chad, things have gotten worse. I feel like pretty much the whole school knows about me and Ben being physical, I knew that it was going to happen at some point since nothing in our lives are private. I'm not too fussed that they know about us, but I would prefer it if Audrey and Chad didn't spread it around the school and I would prefer it if everyone didn't talk about it during lessons and in front of the royal family.
Apart from that, most of the abuse comes from Audrey. Most art lessons, she starts throwing paper at me that read notes saying that 'I shouldn't be here' and that she hopes I 'rot in hell'. It didn't bother me at first but them for some reason last week, my emotions started running high and that's when they started getting to me. Most of the school now calls me a slut and I know Ben and the others tell me to ignore it but that's just my life now. As I mentioned last week, Fairy Godmother finally allowed me to leave school premises now that I have my magic under control, but even me having more space to roam free didn't stop Audrey and Chad. Yesterday they followed me into the village and started recording everything I do, trying to find fault with me like they always seem to do.
So far, I think that their social media posts are the worst. 'Tag the biggest slut you know' or 'we all know a person like this'. I just want this all to end and I know it's up to me how I end it but I don't think that it will ever stop.
Ben still doesn't understand or see anything or hear anything, and because of that, at one point I convinced myself that I was going crazy and hearing and seeing all these things but Evie, Carlos and Jay reassured me that they can also see everything. I think Jay understands to some extent about what is happening. I'm not upset that he knows, in fact, it's nice to have someone watching me every once in a while, but I did tell him two weeks ago that everything was cleared up but by now, I'm positive he's cracked my lie.
I think that Evie suspects something is going on. She has started commenting on all the private chats Jay and I have had recently. For the past couple of days, all she has done is sat me down and forced me to study. I guess I shouldn't be complaining though, I did dump myself on that one when I lied to her a while ago and said I failed a test.
Carlos on the other hand, he's laid back and doesn't really understand the whole situation but I like that. He's the type of person that doesn't get involved unless he has too and that helps a lot with my current situation. He doesn't ask any questions and I don't answer any.
Sometimes, late at night, I lay in bed and wonder what my life would've been like if I did give my mother the wand, or if I didn't decide to leave for Auradon all those months ago. Then I wonder what life would be like if my mother didn't intervene in the Beauty's christening or even if she did kill them. Then I think about what my life would be like if I ran away from this whole mess, move away from Auradon and maybe move somewhere far away. Somewhere quiet and lonely but full of life from the animals that pass by.
Some nights, I don't even think about the other scenarios, all I think about is what would happen if I left, would anyone care? I could live in the wild for years before being found, after all, I was brought up on the Isle. But then again, I should think about Pixie.
Pixie? Oh Pixie, that's right. Today I found out I was pregnant and to be honest I am not angry or upset but I'm not happy either. Sure, it's not the best timing but I believe I can make it work. Of Course, Ben is the father but I'd prefer if he didn't know about Pixie. We are both too young and I'm already a bad enough influence as it is on him. Which is why thoughts and comments like these set my plans into motion. I want to move away, start a new life for myself. I want Ben to be happy and have as little as trouble with the council because of me.
With this plan as well, I could run away from Audrey and Chad. I know I could be hurting some people but I want to keep Pixie and if it means I suffer so Pixie can have a normal life, then so be it. I want this to work, I'm sorry.
Goodnight Diary,
Mal.
A/N Hey guys, hope you enjoyed it, next chapter won't be until next week, i'm flooded with homework, but let me know what you think, See ya later!
