AN: Wow it's been ages since I posted this oops -_-'
Well I promise you guys, this one will get finished, I've got it all laid out, but sometimes life has a funny way of getting majorly in the way. And this is a sort of canon-extension so I wanted to wait until The Frozen Wilds came out to make sure it was still canon, so Hope you guys like chapter 2!
SPOILERS: If you haven't finished The Frozen Wilds yet I wouldn't read this until you do.
If Aloy had thought she was sore last night when she had laid down, she was very mistaken. NOW she was sore, and last night paled in comparison. As the light flooded into the bedroom of Olin's apartment, she was seriously considering calling for help to get out of the bed. Every muscle inside her burned as she stiffly sat up. Moving like a woman twice her age, she somehow managed to slide into her clothes and gently descend the stairs.
The sun was well across its path as she left the apartment, and Aloy squinted, mentally cursing herself for sleeping so late.
"Good morning, Aloy. Or should I say good afternoon?" came a quiet voice, and Aloy's head whipped around to spot a familiar figure leaning against the railing overlooking the rest of the city.
"Aluki," Aloy rasped out, "What are you still doing here?"
The hunter waved a hand away. "Peace, I said I would travel with you and I'm not in a hurry to leave, unless you've got another machine to fight?" she joked.
Is this really the end of it though?
Pointedly ignoring her inner voice, Aloy settled on a better distraction.
"No, no more machines to fight," Aloy said, a wry smile forming on her face, "But I do need two Striders before we leave."
Aloy was not enjoying this. She was most definitely not taking pleasure out of this in any way, shape, or form.
But as much as she told herself that, watching Aluki's strider turning tighter and tighter circles as the other hunter tried in vain to send it forward, was making it very hard to keep a straight face. A small snicker came bubbling up which she deftly disguised as a cough.
"I can hear you laughing at me, Aloy."
Or not so deftly.
"I'm sorry, really, you're doing much better than anyone else has their first time," Aloy reassured, moving her own mount over closer.
"You're just pressing too hard on this plate, see? The switches against its sides are very sensitive, so you've got to sit right in the middle or it'll veer off in the direction you lean."
Aluki wiggled around on the machine, scooting away from the side and the strider finally stopped spinning. Aloy had to give her credit, she had never seen someone pick it up this quickly before, or be so willing to try it in the first place.
In the daylight the woman seemed much more approachable; still strange but not as ethereal. Her face-paint had been scrubbed clean, and their armor was wrapped in bundles which were tied to the back of their mounts. The sound of birds calling and a stream close by bubbling made it hard to believe that yesterday they had been fighting for their lives.
Now they were travelling back to their respective homes. Well. Aluki was going home. Aloy was going back to the tribe. Only duty and her incurable need to help drew her back to what remained of the people she had worked so long to be accepted by. When they rebuilt the villages, mended the fences, set the broken bones, would there actually be a home there for her?
"You are very serious, Aloy," called Aluki, snapping her out of her thoughts, "Has anyone ever told you that?"
Aloy just smiled and shrugged, "Well I am the Anointed One, and conversing with the goddess of all living things will do that to you."
She puffed out her chest and lifted her chin up, flashing cheeky grin. Bravado. Protection. She couldn't help it, but even after she said it, a small part of her regretted it, when the question from the other hunter had been so sincere.
If Aluki saw through it, she was gracious enough to not say so.
"That is a heavy burden to bear. Thank you, Anointed One, for deigning to teach a common hunter the ways of your machine riding."
"Was that sarcasm?" asked Aloy, incredulous.
"Did you, a Banuk, actually just say something sarcastic? And here I thought you were ALL so serious."
"Well a Nora is riding a machine with a smaller glowing machine stuck to the side of her face, coming back from the "Tainted Lands", so I think stranger things have happened," mused Aluki, a glint in her eyes and a mischievous smile on her lips.
Aloy laughed a real and true laugh, and the sun seemed warmer somehow.
"I guess we're both trailblazers then."
They rode on until night had well and truly fallen, until finally the towering shapes of the fort finally came into view.
"We can camp here tonight, and tomorrow we shall go our separate ways I think," said Aluki.
A strange feeling flashed inside Aloy, gone as quickly as it had come. They released their mounts and busied themselves with the starting of a fire.
"Shall I show you a trick, Hunter?" asked Aluki, slyly.
Aloy shrugged, and stood back as Aluki pulled out a small object, flashing green in the dying sunlight.
"Desert glass?" asked Aloy, but there was no reply from the Banuk, now crouched over the kindling.
Aluki turned this way and that, seemingly unable to find the position she wanted, the glass flashing every time it caught the light. Finally she settled, and with a start, Aloy realized the straw and sticks were already starting to smoke furiously.
"How are you doing that?" asked Aloy, awestruck.
"The light shines through the glass and focuses. It becomes much hotter until-"
As if on cue, a small flame burst through the stack of wood, and Aluki quickly bent down to nurse it, blowing and adding more wood as it grew.
"A trick my mother taught me with the ice in the foothills above Ban-Ur. It was my first hunting trip," Aluki said, smiling fondly.
Something- jealously?- flashed inside her, but she quickly swallowed it. There was no way for her to know. She wasn't saying it to be malicious.
"I'm impressed Aluki. I've gotta say, there isn't much I haven't seen but even on my trip to the Cut no one ever showed me that."
"I have shown this to Aratak, but he was far less impressed than you. What can I say? In his eyes this would be taking the 'easy' way out."
Aloy was taken aback. "You know Aratak? And Ourea?"
"I do. I did," amended Aluki. "I know of her sacrifice. I know that her songs say she saved many because of it. Saved a spirit trapped away from the Light. She and my mother were close. I was glad of her success, but her passing is a sour note."
Aloy fell silent, hating that she was so stilted at offering comfort. Even as she felt the sadness, a pang of guilt bubbled up alongside it.
If it weren't for me, she would be alive right now.
"I'm sorry. She was. A great woman." Aloy finished lamely, a blush creeping up on her face. Was that all she could say?
"She was. And a great shaman. And she is free now. Her song is a joyful one."
Aluki patted the ground beside her.
"Sit Aloy. A hunter can spend his entire life on the ice, but he cannot predict all of its movements. Sometimes words are hard to come by, "said Aluki gently, dark eyes fixed on Aloy's blue ones.
Aloy sank down, crossing her legs in front of her and staring deep into the now growing fire.
"Do you think Ourea knew she would die?" Aloy blurted out before she could stop herself.
Aluki glanced at her first, and then leaned back, resting her head on her pack as she gazed at the stars peaking out.
"I think fate calls upon us to act. I think the way we act is our choice. Ours alone. She knew she was called. She chose to answer bravely. I think she knew she might not come back. I think she knew the price was worth it."
"What if I could have saved her?" whispered Aloy, almost too quiet to hear. Almost so quiet she had convinced herself she hadn't said it at all.
"What if you could have? You didn't." came the equally quiet reply. It was said with no malice but it startled Aloy still.
"She was destined to save the Spirit. Her Spirit. And she did. Just as you were destined to defeat the corrupted Demon and save Meridian. Would you have blamed anyone, if you had fallen on the field there?"
"No."
"Just as Ourea would not blame you. The world is heavy. It was never meant to be carried by one person. Even someone as impressive as you."
Aloy sighed deeply and laid back as well, thoughts still racing around her head.
"You said she was destined to save it?" asked Aloy.
Aluki hummed an affirmation.
"What if it's not true though? What if there wasn't a reason for her death? What if it doesn't mean anything in the end?"
"What if it doesn't?" said Aluki, rolling to face Aloy.
"The world is vast. There are many songs we have never heard, many we will never hear or understand. There is much in the world that is uncertain. But you are here. You are alive. The stars are shining, the fire is warm and you are alive. You have survived. You have prevailed. Does that not matter?"
Aloy was silent, stunned. She was acutely aware of how close the other hunter was to her, their breath mingling and rising like the smoke off the fire. All this time she had been wrapped up in everything. In fulfilling GAIA's wishes, in achieving Elisabet's dreams, in pleasing the Nora, the Carja, the Banuk; but she was not GAIA. She wasn't Carja, Banuk, or even really Nora. And she wasn't Elisabet, hard as she may try to be.
She was Aloy.
She had survived.
She had prevailed.
She was here. And the fire was warm, and Aluki was alive and very real next to her. Her journey had been pain and despair and she would bear the weight of it for many months to come but staring into the Banuk's dark, piercing eyes, it struck her that Aluki was right.
Does that not matter? The question echoed still in her head.
"Yes," she breathed; and just for a second in the dark, she thought she could see Aluki smile.
She hadn't been just Aloy in a long time. This was going to take some getting used to.
Aloy was up at dawn the next morning, kicking dirt over the already dead coals of last night's fire and mulling over the many conflicting and tumultuous emotions colliding around her head. Her bag was packed and so was Aluki's. This was goodbye.
Aloy watched Aluki take the northern road, already gently sloping up towards the ruins of the Grave Hoard as she climbed up towards the Cut. With a sigh and a turn, she threw her pack onto her back and threw herself onto her charger. Delaying wouldn't stop the inevitable. She had to go back. She needed to. After all the grief she'd caused the tribe, it was up to her to help them rebuild.
She had become a symbol among the tribe; a symbol that held immense power and hope, perhaps even without reason to back any of it up. Even so, she couldn't not help them. And seeing the faces of the children as she walked through the village, she knew in her heart that she would do what she could for these people. Even if they weren't really her people.
The matriarchs had a celebration welcoming her back. The best food and drink was present, and Aloy was given a beautiful cloak with intricate stitching she could only imagine was the work of Teb. Until mere months ago Aloy had only ever been around Rost, and so here, surrounded by hundreds of cheering, loud, drunk Braves, she felt the tension rising in her, even as she tried to smile it away.
After what felt like days, even if it was only a few hours, the last revelers had left, and Aloy was escorted to the Brave's lodge and given a set of soft leather pants and a tunic. Easing her bruised body out of the armor and sliding into bed, she found herself at once exhausted and also wide awake. There were at least a dozen other hunters all around her, some asleep, some talking and laughing still, and the noise, even though it was muted compared to earlier, was still too much for her to find sleep. She sighed in frustration.
Nora children grew up sleeping together all in the same room. To the Braves, this was normal, comfortable, and even safe, and another stark reminder that Aloy would never be a Nora. Despite her childhood wishes. And so as the hours drug by, she found herself slipping out of the lodge and walking. Her feet carried her out of the village entirely, night sentries nodding reverently as she passed the gates.
Suddenly, without even really meaning it, she was there. Her home. Well...her house at least.
It had stopped being a home since the pile of stones near the entrance had become a shrine.
The wind was cold against her bare arms, but her throat was burning. Why had she come here? This place was only going to hurt her. But it was also the only place she had ever slept, ever felt comfortable. This was the only place that was ever, even for a brief time, a home to her.
She pushed open the door and the burning in her throat transformed into a thick lump that made swallowing difficult. Everything looked exactly the same. Her bed in the small loft, too narrow for her now that she was so tall. The table beside the fire, with bits of leather and machine scrap still laid out, as if Rost would come bursting through the door and tell Aloy to clean up her mess.
With trembling hands, Aloy walked to Rost's own bed, and grasped his thick blanket. It still smelled like him. It was like a stab to the gut, and memories, unbidden, flashed before her eyes.
Rost saying he wanted her to leave. To embrace the tribe. Helis stabbing him.
Survive
His last words on repeat in her mind, as she rubbed her eyes harder and harder, trying desperately to stop the last image of him. The pain in his face as the fire overtook him. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't think. Screams were coming from somewhere. Dimly, she wondered if someone was hurt, as she collapsed on the bed, the weight of her whole journey crashing down on her.
She had been running from it for so long. She had so many things to do, always with the threat of death weighing heavily on her. There hadn't been time to process any of it. And if she was being truthful, she hadn't wanted to. But now she had no choice. Now she was reliving it and it felt like dying herself.
Her body gave out, as the sun began to crest over the snowy tree line, and she fell asleep still curled in the blanket.
