Note: Yes, another update! See, comments really do fuel my muse! ;) Hehe, okay, bad joke. No but seriously, hang in there and thank you for all the support I've gotten so far on this fic! I hope you enjoy this emotion-fest that I'm throwing at you! :)
Hunted
Chapter 23: The Memories
Thunder sounded over the city. People honked their car-horns as they tried to make their way through the streets without accident, even though it was already way past midnight. Oliver thought of all the dangers that lurked in the shadows for a moment but his focus quickly shifted back to what was most important: Felicity.
Lightning flashed across the sky, momentarily blinding him as rain poured down on him, running below his clothes, chilling his body to his very core. He couldn't think about how damn freezing it was, with the wind picking up as he sped through the streets of the city, trying to get to the clock tower as fast as possible.
He hadn't given Sara any time to explain why she had come to him. All he knew was that Felicity had gone against the team's wishes and taken the serum. Oliver thought about calling Diggle and the others, but decided against it, hoping that he would be able to handle whatever it was that was thrown his way when he got to the old tower.
His heart was beating loudly in his chest, pounding against its cage and his breathing was ragged. He remembered how he had felt during his first couple of days on Lian Yu, out of breath and out of hope, and he couldn't help but feel the same way now as he parked his bike in the alley. Sara was right behind him, directing him up the secret passageway to the top of the tower. Oliver swallowed thickly as she walked him to the room and stopped right outside of the door, turning to look at him expectantly, holding something out for him to take.
Oliver looked at the item in Sara's hand, recognizing it as a mask but he just shook his head and pushed past her. He couldn't be bothered with concealing his identity from Nyssa Al Ghul. All he could think about was reaching Felicity and seeing that she was okay.
He entered the room and instantly he paused. Felicity was in the middle of the room, laying on what looked to be a medical-bed, similar to the one they had in the Foundry. She was wearing a tanktop and a pair of sports shorts, her eyes closed and her face pale. He could see small tremors running through her body every other second and he couldn't quite grasp what was happening to her other than the fact that she was clearly unconscious.
His feet felt heavy as he walked up to her. Nyssa, who had been standing right next to Felicity, looking down at the blonde who seemed to be glowing every time lightning illuminated the room, turned her gaze to him instead. She had lit candles all around them and Oliver wasn't sure if it was all part of the ritual, but he figured it might be. Still, he dragged himself toward Felicity and stood above her for only a second. His eyes settled on her chest, his blood running cold for just a moment before his heart began pounding away again.
She was still breathing, he realized. Her chest moved up and down slowly, it was barely noticeable, but it was there. He didn't comprehend fully what he did next. All he felt was pain as his knees hit the concrete floor and he reached for Felicity's hand, which was pale, clammy and cold to the touch. He grasped her fingers, running his own between hers and closed his eyes as his throat closed up, the helpless emotion welling up inside of him again.
-§-
Everything was so peaceful. The wind picked up a bit, making her golden locks swirl. Felicity laughed, brushing back her hair as she leaned back against the tree. The young ones were running in the field, their parents preparing dinner. She had finally found herself a pack where she felt like she belonged.
It was a sunny afternoon and the first real day of Spring. The pack had decided to celebrate by having a barbecue. Felicity was still new, so she was told to keep an eye on the kids while the others prepared the food and set the table. There were about fifteen of them, but most weren't wolves at all. With Felicity, there were about seven wolves in total. The others were either human mates or children who hadn't turned yet.
Everything was calm. Felicity watched the kids before briefly turning her eyes to the grass. There in front of her, was a flower that she couldn't remember having seen before. She frowned as the winds blew stronger, reaching for the blossom.
Something whizzed through the air and Felicity looked up just in time to see one of the mates collapse. A second passed, Felicity's eyes locked on the arrow sticking out of the woman's forehead, her eyes glazed over. Another moment and then screams and cries erupted all around her. She stood, running toward the children on instinct, tears falling from her eyes as she watched them all be slaughtered one by one. Twenty hunters came out of the woods, from all directions, forcing them into a tight circle. It took her a moment to realize that they were only killing the humans. The wolves were being rounded up in the middle.
Felicity took a hold of the youngest child, Jimmy, and growled at the two hunters who were pointing their guns at them. She hid Jimmy behind herself, and the little boy was crying, clutching her leg just as one of the hunters shot her. She winced, instantly feeling dizzy. Looking down, she saw the small dart sticking out of her arm. She tore it away from her body, reaching for Jimmy again, but everything was turning blurry.
She fell into the grass and the last thing she saw were yellow eyes boring into hers, making her realize that the people who had attacked weren't hunters after all.
They were something much worse.
-§-
Oliver held her hand tightly, his stomach feeling heavy. His heart beat loudly inside his chest as he pressed Felicity's hand against his forehead. She was so cold that he almost shivered. He pulled her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss first to her open palm and then continuing to her fingertips.
She had to wake up.
There was no alternative.
Within all the emotions that were inside of him, he felt anger once again build up. This would have never happened if Nyssa hadn't told her about the serum. He wanted to turn around and tell the League-member as much, but before he could, the tremors running through Felicity's body became worse. All of the sudden, her whole body started shaking and Oliver jumped back as he felt a sting on his palm. He looked down and saw that Felicity had extended her claws, straight into his palm. He was bleeding.
"What the hell is happening to her?" Oliver snapped at Nyssa, standing up so that he could hold down her body.
"Just keep holding her down, Mr. Queen," Nyssa said, hurrying to the table and pulling out some restraint. Oliver's eyes widened as the woman proceeded to tie Felicity to the table. Oliver looked at Felicity, seeing that her face was scrunched up in pain. It reminded him all too much of the night of the Undertaking and he felt helpless because there was nothing he could do.
"Felicity," Oliver said, leaning down closer to her. She kept shaking and he held her down, but it was getting worse. A part of him wondered whether she'd wake up suddenly and attack him, but he had to trust her. "Felicity, please… You're safe… I'm here, I swear, I'm here," he continued, hoping that she could hear the sincerity in his voice. His throat felt too thick, as if tears were blocking him from properly speaking.
"Your pleas will do her no good…" Nyssa's angry tone trailed off as the seizures let up. Oliver kept staring at Felicity's face, not sure what was going to happen next. He glanced toward Nyssa and Sara. He saw the confusion written on their faces. It was clear that neither of them had expected him to get through to Felicity. Quite frankly, he was in a bit of a shock himself.
"Tell me what happened," he demanded, trying to cool his anger that was once again rearing it's ugly head as his worry faded.
"She took the serum willingly," Sara explained, her arms crossed. "I tried talking her out of it, but you know how she can be when she makes a decision."
"She isn't unreasonable," Oliver spat. "If she had known how dangerous-"
"Trust me, Mr. Queen, I informed your little wolf of what she was getting herself into," Nyssa said. "I even allowed her to take my scent, so that she would know I wasn't lying."
"So what now?" Oliver asked before turning to Sara. "Why did you leave her here alone? She's a fucking member of the League. They are hunters, Sara!"
"Felicity would have wanted to have you here," Sara said. "And I trust Nyssa."
"I don't!" Oliver snapped again. He was breathing heavily and he felt a rush of something run through his body. "We have to wake her up."
"We can't," Nyssa said, stepping toward him. Her stance was threatening and Oliver straightened, glaring down at her. "Felicity is now in a state similar to hypnosis. Her mind is moving through her subconscious, looking through her memories trying to find some kind of clue as to what happened to her when she was captured," she explained, looking serious now.
"If we try to wake her up, Oliver, she might never wake up again," Sara said.
Oliver's heart clenched painfully again. He lifted his hand, wanting to run it through his hair when he noticed the blood there. He had completely forgotten that Felicity had cut him accidentally for a second. The blood trickled up his arm, painting his forearm red and he slowly lowered his hand again.
"Let me help you clean that," Sara said quietly. "It's the least I could do…"
Oliver wanted to protest but he knew that he didn't have it in him anymore. He just wanted Felicity to be okay and if he did something which put her at risk, he would never be able to live with himself. As he passed Nyssa, he stopped again, glaring at her, "If anything happens to Felicity, I'll make sure you don't last a breath longer than she does."
He pushed past the woman, following Sara who motioned for him to sit down in a chair. She walked away momentarily to get some bandages and Oliver kept his eyes firmly on Felicity who was breathing slowly.
"I have to admit, Mr. Queen, I saw the same ferocity in your little wolf during our first meeting," Nyssa spoke up suddenly. "A trait which is not uncommon when it comes to mates protecting one another."
Oliver turned to her, startled. He stared at her, wondering just how much this stranger knew about him and Felicity. They didn't even know anything themselves yet… In fact, Felicity probably didn't even know that Roy had talked to Oliver about what he suspected might be going on between them.
"Felicity and I aren't… We're not mates," he said, narrowing his eyes at Nyssa. The woman looked amused though and only shook her head, as if what he was saying was the silliest thing she had ever heard. "We're not," Oliver insisted, but deep down, he felt as if something inside of him was telling him that he was lying.
Nyssa opened her mouth to respond, but before she could, Sara re-entered the room with a bandage. "I left it in the other room," she said. "I had forgotten where it was since I practically moved into the Foundry…" She proceeded to clean the wounds, washing away the blood. Oliver could clearly see the marks that Felicity's claws had left behind and it seemed like the cuts were a bit deeper than they had first anticipated.
"I might have to do stitches," Sara said. "Just a few so that the wounds don't re-open… It might scar," she told him.
"Got plenty of those," he said. "A few more small ones aren't going to kill me."
"Felicity… She'll feel bad about all of this when she wakes up," Sara continued.
Oliver nodded slowly, "It isn't her fault though. She couldn't help it."
They were talking in hushed voices so that Nyssa wouldn't hear, but he was pretty sure that the huntress was focusing on Felicity at the moment by the way that she was looking at her.
"I'm sorry, Oliver," Sara sighed. "If I hadn't set up that first meeting with Nyssa… I should have done something to stop her."
Oliver looked down at his hand as Sara finished stitching him up. She cleaned it again and then wrapped his hand in a bandage quickly. He wanted to tell her that it was okay because deep down he knew that Felicity wouldn't have stopped pushing. She wanted answers and he only hoped that she would wake up from all of this with them.
"What happened happened," Oliver said. "We can't change it now. We just have to hope that she'll wake up again."
Sara reached for his good hand and squeezed gently, looking him in the eyes, "I know she will. She's strong. Stronger than I ever gave her credit for."
Oliver started to reply, but was interrupted when he heard a low mumble. He twisted around and looked toward Felicity again. Her head moved slowly from one side to the other and her lips were moving, but no words were coming out. Instantly, he stood up and hurried to stand by her side again as Nyssa pulled a chair closer to the bed so that she could sit by Felicity's head.
"What's she saying?" Oliver asked, leaning closer to Felicity.
"Nothing yet, just incoherent mumbling," Nyssa said. "She's still walking through it all. Soon I'll be able to guide her through the maze of her own mind."
Felicity gasped then, her mouth falling open as she stopped moving. Oliver went cold, "What is going on?"
"She's reached the place that she was looking for," Nyssa said. "She's been captured, most likely."
"What do you mean, 'captured'?" Oliver frowned.
Nyssa glanced at him before looking at Felicity again. "She's gone back to when the Master's men first captured her and her pack," she explained. "She's living through her memories."
"Living through?" Oliver asked. "She's living them again?" Nyssa only nodded.
Oliver remembered the night that Felicity had broken down and told him about the nightmares she was having from the time she was captured. Even back then it had all been hazy to her but she remembered the death of the little boy who had in the end caused her to surrender vividly. If Felicity was really living her memories again, Oliver could only imagine the pain that she would end up going through, at least mentally. He only wished that it wouldn't also leave too many scars on her soul when she woke up again.
-§-
The wind caressed her cheek gently, as if trying to tell her that things would be fine.
What a lie, she thought to herself, her hands grasping the chains that were holding her up. She was prepared now, as she had been every day these last couple of weeks.
"The other subjects didn't survive the first injection," one of the men said, "but somehow you did. That means that you're strong. You're someone we want on our side."
Felicity couldn't open her eyes to look at him. They were talking about her strength when she felt as if she had nothing left. She knew that the rest of her pack was gone. The wolves that had been captured with her hadn't survived whatever it was that they were giving them and she didn't know how much longer she would be able to take it either. Her sense of time was destroyed; she felt as if she had been their captive for months, maybe even years. Still, it couldn't have been more than a week or two at most.
She stayed still as she felt the men approach her. She didn't move until she felt the sting of the needle piercing her skin. Then, she growled and shook against her restraints, pulling at the chains with everything that she had left. She kicked wildly at one of the men who was knocked over, and when the other guards were called in, she tried to avoid the taser, but to no avail. The electric currents ran through her and she gasped before going limp. Her head fell forward and she screamed inside her own mind when she felt the needle pierce again.
"We need a more permanent fix," one of the men said. "Who knows how long the dose will actually hold this time around? She needs to turn so that we can evaluate more."
Another man snickered and she remembered him when he reached up and touched her cheek, pulling her head back by her hair so that he could look into her eyes. "I'll make her turn," he said. "She's going to wish that she had submitted sooner once I'm done with her."
-§-
"Felicity," Nyssa said, her voice low and steady. "Felicity, can you hear me?"
Oliver looked at Felicity who was still mumbling. He reached for her hand again, but Nyssa looked at him sharply, shaking her head.
He felt Sara's hand on his shoulder, "You shouldn't disturb her now."
Oliver wasn't sure what he should do. Nyssa continued to speak to Felicity, as if the blonde could actually hear her somehow, but she wasn't responding so Oliver felt as if he was slowly losing his mind.
"Little wolf," Nyssa said. "Are you listening?"
Oliver looked up when he heard a small gasp. His eyes zeroed in on Felicity's mouth which had fallen open.
"Yes…"
It was a whisper so low that Oliver wasn't sure that he had heard it at first. Then he saw Felicity swallow, and his heart soared, "Yes, I'm listening."
She sounded lost, as if she wasn't really there. As if she was hearing Nyssa through a haze and that she wasn't entirely certain who she was talking to. Oliver stood up from the chair he was sitting on and looked at them, but Nyssa held up her hand to stop him from coming closer. Instead, she leaned down towards Felicity.
"Where are you, Felicity?" Nyssa asked.
Felicity's eyebrows furrowed, "I don't know."
"Look around," Nyssa insisted. "Tell me what you see."
Oliver watched as Felicity's face contorted, as if she was in pain. "I'm in a cell. It's cold here…" Felicity trailed off.
"Are you alone?" Nyssa questioned again.
"They left a while ago," Felicity told her.
"Who are they?"
Felicity paused for a good while, as if thinking about what her answer should be. Oliver waited, holding his breath hoping that she would be able to identify someone at least so that they could get a lead on the Master. However, that was only secondary now because he wanted nothing more than for Felicity to wake up again.
"Winnick Norton is one of them," Felicity finally replied. "I don't know the names of the others. They work for Him, though." She winced, "It burns."
Nyssa nodded slowly, "What is burning you, little wolf?"
"The… The thing they injected me with," Felicity said, once again not sounding sure. "It isn't the first time… His blood is in the vial too, I think."
"What's on your mind now? What are you thinking?" Nyssa asked.
"They said they would need a permanent fix… That it wasn't working how they wanted it to…" Felicity trailed off again. Suddenly, she grasped the sides of the table and started struggling against her restraints again. "No, no! Leave him alone! He's just a child!"
Oliver threw himself over Felicity's body, holding her down as Nyssa walked around the table and held her head, forcing her to stay still. Oliver saw blood trickle down the side of Felicity's face and he realized that her thrashing had caused her to injure herself on the metal table. Sara walked around the table, checking her restraints so that they hadn't torn. Oliver looked at Felicity's face just as a tear rolled down her cheek and she went limp again.
"They killed him…" Felicity whispered. "They killed Jimmy."
Oliver closed his eyes, remembering the pain in her voice when she had first told him the story. He hated that she was living through it all again and he wished there was something he could do. Still laying half on top of her, Oliver gently squeezed her, hoping that she could feel his embrace.
"Jimmy was already dead, Felicity," Nyssa told her. Oliver looked at the woman and saw pity in her eyes. It was clear that she felt sorry for Felicity, something which Oliver had not expected at all. "What happened after he died?"
"I turned," Felicity said, still sounding upset but this time with a hint of anger in her tone. "I wanted to rip them apart for what they did. I wanted to kill them all."
"Did you do it?" Nyssa wondered. "When you got out, did you slaughter them for what they had done?"
"No," Felicity shook her head. "I'm not a killer… I'm not a monster."
Oliver sighed as he stood up again. He looked at Nyssa this time and she looked like she wanted to protest, but she didn't. Instead, she gave him a short nod, stepping away from Felicity. She looked at him expectantly and Oliver reached for Felicity's cheek, cupping it gently.
"You're not a monster, Felicity," he said, repeating what she had said. "Do you hear me? Do you know who I am?"
Another tear fell from the corner of Felicity's eye and she drew in a ragged breath. "Oliver," she breathed out, but she still didn't open her eyes.
"You wanted answers," he said, brushing away her tears. "I know it hurts… But you're not alone. I'm here. I promise, I'll always be here."
More tears fell and Felicity sniffled. Oliver leaned down and pressed his forehead against hers, closing his eyes as he tried to keep his own emotions in check. "Tell me what happened next," he said. "Tell me what happened to you."
"They weren't sure I would make it," she started. "So many had died already. When I survived, they- They wanted to train me. They wanted me to be one of them, but I wouldn't submit fully. They didn't understand but they thought there was something wrong with the vial they had injected me with."
"What was wrong with it?" Oliver asked.
"They didn't think it would be permanent… They didn't know how long it was going to last. I was-" she cut herself off abruptly. "I was just an experiment."
"You're more than that," Oliver insisted, wanting to comfort her.
"To them I wasn't," Felicity said. "They wanted to break me, but couldn't because I knew the truth."
"What was the truth, Felicity?" Nyssa stepped in. "What did you know that they didn't?"
A hint of a smile appeared on Felicity's face, "That I was a wolf and that they would never be able to fully turn me."
-§-
She was allowed to sit now.
They had taken her to another room after she had turned back into human form. She hadn't been awake, but she knew that they had bathed her and cleaned her up. The room she was in now looked like some kind of hospital room, but she was certain it wasn't.
Felicity closed her eyes, hearing her own heart beating in her ears. Good, she thought. It meant that she still had a pulse; she was still herself.
She stood up from her seat and looked at the walls. She was no longer chained up. Turning from one side to the other, she saw a big mirror covering the majority of the wall that had been behind her. Looking at herself, she noticed her pale complexion. She frowned, walking closer to the mirror. She blinked a couple of times, reached out and put her palm flat against the glass. It was cold to the touch, but she could feel something else as well.
Vibrations.
Felicity took a step back and stared at her reflection. There was something behind that mirror, she knew it. Someone was watching her and she twisted around, trying to find a way out, but there was nothing, not even a door.
"What did you do to me?" Felicity asked out loud. Her question echoed in the room and a few seconds later, she heard a small hiss. She looked up, searching for the source of the sound. Her eyes focused on a small device on the ceiling. It looked almost like a security camera, a red light blinking. She stepped forward when she heard the hissing noise again and then she felt something wet on her cheek.
Felicity reached up, touching her cheek. She drew her hand away and saw the red smear, instantly recognizing the coppery smell as blood. Her senses were heightened and goosebumps raised all across her body. She looked at the mirror again, but this time, her eyes weren't their normal blue color.
They were glowing golden.
-§-
"What do you see now?" Nyssa asked. It had been a couple of minutes since Felicity had spoken last and neither of them was sure that she was going to do so again. Oliver knew that Nyssa had to try to reach Felicity again because they didn't want to lose contact with her.
"They think I'm asleep," Felicity replied. "I'm pretending, but they're buying it. They're talking."
"About what?" Oliver wondered, brushing back some of Felicity's damp hair. She was still cold to the touch, but she was sweating.
"An Undertaking," she replied.
Oliver paused and stared at her face for a second. "Is it Malcolm?" he asked, knowing very well that it wouldn't be.
"No, it's someone else," Felicity said. "I can't see them, but I can hear them… His voice…" She trailed off for a moment. "They knew about Merlyn. They thought he was a fool to think that a simple earthquake would get rid of them. Instead he made the city more vulnerable… An easier target."
He could see the tension roll through her body suddenly. It looked as if she had tensed up, because she had seen or heard something that she knew hadn't been meant for her to know.
"He knows I'm awake!" she gasped just before she began shaking again.
"Felicity, no!" Oliver couldn't help his outburst when her head lolled to the side. Foam was coming out of her mouth and she sounded as if she was choking. He could feel Sara and Nyssa moving around him, taking out some tools, but he couldn't see what they were doing because his own vision was blurry. "Felicity, please!" he begged. "Just wake up, please. I don't care about the Master, I don't care about anything! Please just wake up!"
His heart felt as if it was cramping up and he could hardly breathe himself. His shoulders shook and he couldn't stop himself as he leaned over her again, pressing his face into the crook of her neck as she continued to gasp. "Please, please…" he continued to whisper.
"Oliver," Sara spoke up behind him and he didn't understand why she sounded so worried about him all of the sudden. He pulled back just a little and noticed that Felicity had stopped shaking, but there was still a layer of sweat on her body. Her tanktop was completely soaked through and her hair was plastered to her face, sweat mixed with blood. Oliver pulled away from her and turned his back toward them all, wiping at his cheeks furiously. He hadn't even realized that he was crying, but tears were falling down his cheeks and his shoulders kept shaking with sobs. It wasn't making any sense; this sudden sadness that came over him. He just wanted Felicity to be okay.
-§-
"She doesn't want to submit," the man said, his voice deep. Felicity's vision was blurry and she could still feel his fingers around her throat. She was having trouble breathing but she couldn't do anything to stop him from squeezing just a little tighter. "She doesn't have to," he continued, "but she won't be remembering anything else either."
"Master?"
She recognized Winnick Norton's voice because he had mocked her enough times. She remembered how he had slit Jimmy's throat and it made her blood boil again.
"We'll let her go," the man said. Her vizion began to focus again, but his face was covered by something. She couldn't see who he was, no matter how hard she tried. "She'll play her part in all of this eventually, you'll see. She'll go to him because everything inside of her is telling her to fight injustice. She'll be driven by wanting to take me down, but she won't even know that she'll be doing everything I want her to do."
"How is that possible," Norton questioned. "You're… You're compelling her?"
"Only to forget," the Master replied. "Only to forget the important things. Just let her go, you'll see. Let her do what she wants and she'll and she'll make everything fall into place."
Her vision failed her and everything fell into darkness, but she could still hear his voice in her ears: "You'll see."
-§-
She wasn't sure how much time had passed since she had passed out, but when she opened her eyes again, she breathed in fresh air. Felicity looked around, not seeing anything other than woods around herself.
They had killed them all; her entire pack was gone.
She fought the urge to break down and cry, knowing that it wouldn't help her now. They had turned her into a hybrid and this was her new reality now… She was going to have to live with it, no matter how much she wished that she didn't have to. She had to stop him, the Master. There was no way of knowing how many were actually aware of the fact that he existed.
She was going to have to learn how to deal with her new situation. She'd learn how to control herself and her new powers and then she was going to find someone who was willing to help her. Felicity looked at her hands and up at the full moon that was the only thing giving her light. She inhaled deeply once more and knew exactly what she was going to do.
Her bones broke slowly, one by one and she gritted her teeth, not wanting to show weakness. When she rose on all fours, her eyes glowed golden again and she looked up at the sky, seeing clearly for the first time in what felt like forever.
She howled.
-§-
The howl shook Oliver completely. He turned around and stared at Felicity who was half-sitting, roaring as her canines elongated and her eyes glowed as they snapped open. She was still restrained, but she wasn't fighting her bonds. Instead, it seemed like she had just forced herself awake from whatever dream the serum had caused her to have.
She was drenched in sweat and panting when she slumped back again, her eyes closing, but she seemed more alive than ever. Oliver hurried to her side, unbuckling the restraints together with Sara and Nyssa and before her could even react, Felicity threw her arms around him.
Her embrace was fierce and she was clutching him as if she never wanted to let him go. Oliver held her just as tightly, slowly sinking to the floor with her still in his arms.
"I was wrong," she told him, her breathing still heavy. "Oliver, I was wrong about everything."
"Shh… It's okay," Oliver said, running his hand over the back of her head. "Breathe, just breathe through it."
Felicity nodded against him, but she kept holding on. Oliver closed his eyes, finally feeling like he was able to breathe himself.
-§-
They were still sitting on the floor together. He was still holding her and she was letting him. She shouldn't be letting him touch her like this, but she just couldn't help herself.
Felicity had no idea for how long she had been unconscious. She listened to Oliver as he whispered into her ear everything that had been happening while she had been under the serum. He had thought that he was going to lose her and he had been helpless, not being able to do anything to stop it from happening. She didn't remember what she had told them when she had been under the influence of the League's truth serum, but she did remember what she had seen in her dreams.
Her memories were open to her once more, but she wasn't sure that anything she had remembered would actually help them to identify the Master. Still, she had found out quite a few things about herself and what had happened to her. She understood now why she was changing the more she bonded with Roy and she understood exactly how she had escaped because she hadn't escaped at all.
"He let me go," she told Oliver in a hushed whisper.
Oliver froze, "What do you mean?"
She could feel how tense he was, but he kept holding her. He wasn't pushing her away. "He knew that I would never fully submit to him so he compelled me to forget a lot of things and then let me go," Felicity explained, her voice hoarse. "He knew that I would want answers and that I would want to defeat him… He knew that I'd end up looking for help." Oliver's grip on her tightened and she couldn't help the sob that escaped her. "He knew I'd reach out to you, Oliver. He knew that I would end up leading you directly to him. That's what he wants," she cried.
"It's not your fault," Oliver said, pulling her tighter against him.
"I wish I had been stronger, I wish I had known," Felicity said, clutching his shirt in her hand, twisting the material.
"Hey, hey… It's not your fault," Oliver repeated. "I still believe in you."
She whimpered, nuzzling against him as she shut her eyes tightly. She inhaled his scent, instantly feeling comforted by his presence.
She shouldn't be feeling this way around him anymore.
"I might still be a wolf, Oliver," she told him, knowing that he had to hear this. "Whatever they injected me with, they were having problems with developing it. They weren't sure how long it would work on me. Whatever it was, it might stop working after a while."
"Felicity, it's been over a year since you were turned," Oliver said. "I know you wish there was some kind of cure, but-"
She reached up and cupped his cheek, forcing him to look at her. "I know, Oliver," she said. "But since Roy and I started a pack and I've forced myself to turn into a wolf… I've feel like I've been losing the vampire part of me more and more."
"You can't get your hopes up, Felicity," Oliver insisted. "I understand that you want nothing more than to just be yourself again, but until we know for sure…"
"Okay, okay," Felicity nodded, once again leaning into him.
She felt weak and she knew that that was why she kept leaning on him. That was why she was still sitting between his legs, allowing him to hold her close. For a moment, she allowed herself to pretend that there was nothing wrong between them, that Russia had never happened and that they just were. She wouldn't need anything else, if she knew that he was with her. The feeling inside of her was warming her up and she felt like she had found her place. It was just wishful thinking, though, she knew. Because after tonight, she would have to face the things that she had learned and she would have to deal with them. She had a lot of work to do and until they stopped the Master, she wasn't sure she should talk to Oliver regarding what they potentially were to each other.
Maybe Roy had been right, after all.
-§-
"Nyssa and I will be leaving Starling City tonight," Sara said after a moment of silence. Oliver noticed that she and Nyssa had cleaned up the place and there was a backpack in the corner of the room, probably with Sara's things.
"I am well aware of how skeptic I was towards helping you, Ms. Smoak," Nyssa said, "but it seems that I was wrong to think that all Dark Ones are the same. You are extraordinary."
Oliver was still holding Felicity, but he could feel that she had stopped shaking now. Her tears were drying against his skin but he couldn't find it in himself to let her go.
"If you ever need out help, I'm sure you'll be able to locate us somehow, Felicity," Sara said, offering them both a small smile.
"The serum has worn off and you shouldn't worry about any lingering side-effects," Nyssa told them. "It's normal to feel disoriented for a few days."
"Thank you for your help, Nyssa," Felicity said, sounding tired.
Oliver looked down at her, seeing that she looked exhausted. In fact, he too was feeling as if he hadn't slept at all. He looked at his watch and saw that it was almost five o'clock in the morning. The storm had passed, but it was still raining outside. He had to get Felicity home somehow, but he wasn't sure how since he had taken his bike to get to the clock tower.
"I should help you clean up a bit," Sara said, offering her hand to Felicity. "You're exhausted, I know, but we have to at least clean up the blood on your head."
Felicity looked up at him and he slowly nodded, pulling away from her just a little bit so that he could stand and then help her up. Her legs were a bit wobbly from what he could tell, but he was sure that she'd get her strength back soon. Oliver held her up until Sara reached out and started supporting her instead. Sara gave him a small smile and then walked away with Felicity to the other room so that she could clean up in privacy.
Oliver stood still before looking down at his hand that was still wrapped up. It was stinging a bit, but he'd had worse. Now that the adrenaline was wearing off he was finally feeling his own exhaustion.
"What made you, a hunter, take up a hybrid as a lover?" Nyssa questioned as she came to stand beside him.
Oliver shook his head, "I've told you already that things between me and Felicity aren't like that."
Nyssa turned to look at him, searching his eyes for a moment. "Your bond with that little wolf runs deep, Oliver Queen," she said. "It would do you good to stop denying what is right in front of you."
Oliver didn't say anything in response. He remained silent and looked out the window, watching the rain pour down over the city. He knew very well what he felt toward Felicity. It wasn't up to him anymore. He would keep showing her how much he cared and regretted what he had done to destroy what had been between them, and he could only hope that she would eventually let him in fully again.
They had been making progress, but things had continued to be awkward. He wanted them to work on their friendship and trust before they could even discuss being anything more. He knew that his feelings for her ran deep, perhaps even deeper than he would ever be able to understand. What he had felt tonight when he hadn't been able to do something to help her had been awful, but it had shaken him all the way down in his core. He had been shocked at the emotions that had coursed through him and the way that he had somehow felt connected to her. The bond that Roy had told him about and the comment that Nyssa had made so many times already about the two of them being mates… Well, a part of him hadn't wanted to believe it at first because he understood that it meant that he had completely shattered Felicity when he had done what he had done. Yet, he knew that it was time to face reality. He knew that he had done wrong and he regretted it more than anything in the world. He wanted to make things right and he would never give up.
Oliver cleared his throat, turning to Nyssa. "You don't by any chance have a car I can borrow, do you?"
-§-
Half an hour later, Oliver sat in the driver's seat of Nyssa's car. He hadn't even questioned her where she had gotten it, but he was pretty sure that she had somehow managed to rent it, despite the police looking for her throughout the city after the whole airport debacle. He had left his bike for her to use when she and Sara left town, but he couldn't help but wonder how they were going to get away from the city before dawn broke.
Oliver looked over at Felicity who was sitting in the passenger seat. He wanted to ask her how she was doing, but he already knew how tired she was. There was no point of questioning her further regarding what she had remembered, because he was certain that she would talk to the rest of the team tomorrow. He had tried telling her that she needed to take a day off, but she had insisted that they had to get back to it. Oliver just didn't have it in him anymore to fight her on it.
Her fingers reaching for his shook him out of his thoughts. Oliver looked at her again, this time confusedly, but she was still looking straight ahead as she pulled his hand over to her lap. She laced their fingers together, not speaking a word, and she didn't have to. Oliver could hear her perfectly well and he understood what she needed.
So he remained silent and squeezed her hand, hoping that he could show her through the small action that he was still with her, no matter what.
Note: Phew! That was a lot to take in, wasn't it? I'm going to let you guys process it and everything, but I just want to clarify something quickly: Yes, Felicity IS a hybrid, but from her memories, she could tell that the thing they were injecting her with was still in the experimental stages. She doesn't really know if she can go back to being just a wolf, but there is hope, in her mind. Oliver tried to "talk her down" a bit there because he knows how much she hates being a hybrid deep down and he doesn't want her to get her hopes up. We won't know if it's possible for her to remove the vampire part of her until we meet the Master.
Oh, and by the way, she was LET GO. She didn't escape like she previously remembered having done, because she was only able to remember what the Master compelled her to remember. Now, if that doesn't show just how powerful that guy is, then I don't know what does...
I really hope you enjoyed the chapter and I look forward to hearing your thoughts! I hope I didn't disappoint, and also, remember, the next chapter will be "lighter" and will force Felicity to come to terms with her own feelings for Oliver, much like he did with his feelings for her in this chapter.
So tell me, what was your favorite part? Was there something that shocked you and surprised you? Something you didn't expect? Did you notice the dialogue of one memory being related to the lines Felicity heard in her head during Malcolm's sound-device attack during the Undertaking back in ch. 18? Was it clear enough what was a memory and what was present time with Oliver?
Thank you so much for reading! Love you all, have a great week! xx
