Staying on Top

It was a day like any other day. There was paperwork to be completed, missions that would require her to send out half the Atlantis mission teams and there was John Sheppard. While the first two things didn't concern her, the third did.

John was fast becoming a big part of her life and she had begun to wonder about that. Was it more than just a professional need that they stay in contact so much? He was the Lead Military Officer and as such they had to talk and ensure they both stayed on top of things and in agreement with each other to keep Atlantis under strong rule.

That said, they saw each other every day when John wasn't away on a mission with his team and most of their interactions consisted of them talking about their days, bickering about how much she worked and whether she should take a break or not, arguing over something that one of them were considering before implementation of said thing, or teaming up against Rodney for some reason or other.

They smiled, they laughed, they fought and they acted, as Rodney had said one time, like they had been married for years. The thing about that was it all came naturally, and in the end they would go to any lengths necessary to protect the other should the situation arise for it.

It scared her to think that maybe that meant something, but think it she did. She stared into space as she thought about it, the end of a pen clenched between her teeth. Had John noticed it too? Surely he had. He was intelligent (it's why she fought to have him on her team in the first place) and he noticed things sometimes that most would not.

She would be surprised if he didn't know, if he hadn't noticed or suspected anything.

There was a knock on the door. She glanced up, at once brought back to the present. "Chuck," she said.

"Sheppard's team won't be back til tomorrow. He said to tell you not to worry and he'll bring you back some of the local cuisine."

"Okay. Thank you." As an afterthought, she asked, "Did Sheppard inform you why they won't be back today?"

Chuck nodded. "Yes, Dr Weir. The locals invited them to stay for another day as things were taking longer than expected."

"Patch him through if he contacts us again."

"Will do."


The next morning, she was in her office when the call came. "It's Sheppard," Chuck told her, and then he patched him through to her headset. She thanked him and waited for him to leave before speaking.

"John?"

"Elizabeth. Hey." He sounded tired, like maybe he hadn't slept.

"Hey, are you all right?"

"Yeah. Yeah, we're good. Should be back in two hours." There was a faint squabbling sound and then someone - Ronon, perhaps? - scolded Rodney. "Okay. Maybe things are tense here," he admitted, "But we're still alive and we've got new allies in the locals here. We were up all night finalizing the treaty."

"Excellent job," she said. "I'll see you when you get back and you can fill me in on the details."

"Yeah," he agreed. "Showers first though, and then the debrief. Trust me. You'll be asking for us to shower when we get there."

"That bad?"

"Worse," he confirmed. "Let's just say there was an incident with some of the native flora that secretes some funky slime when you touch it, and Rodney was in a very touchy mood."

In the background she heard Rodney protest, "Hey!"

"We'll discuss that later and if the locals don't mind, I'll send out our bontanist for further research. And John?"

"What's up?"

"I have something I'd like to talk about when you get here. As soon as possible if you don't mind." She wet her lips with her tongue and swallowed. She hadn't meant to say that. It had just come to her when she heard his voice that maybe she should bring up her thoughts about the two of them. Why she had thought it was a good idea, she didn't know.

"Of course. We'll talk."

"Great."

"Later then, 'lizabeth. Should be an hour or two, tops."

She smiled at that. "I'll see you then."

It was two and a half hours before John and his team showed up. She had spent the previous half hour worrying that something had gone wrong. Chuck had comforted her a few times and said they were probably just late and had misjudged their return time. She hadn't been so sure.

When the stargate activated and John's code came through, she was relieved. When John stepped through after his team, she let out the breath she hadn't realised she had been holding.

She immediately headed down and met John and his team on the steps. "You're late," she accused.

John shrugged and gave her a sheepish grin. "I may have gotten distracted," he admitted. "See, there was a bar and the locals were really friendly there and we ended up having a few drinks."

"On the job?" she said.

"They didn't tell us it was alcohol at first! They called it something else. And we figured it'd be rude to say no."

John's team, greeting those who were around to welcome them back, began a leisurely walk away to their quarters and showers. Rodney complained loudly to Chuck about the stench that was soaking into his clothing and asked the poor technician to order him another uniform – to which she said quickly, "That's not Chuck's job, Rodney. Go and shower and put on some washing."

When she turned back to John she caught him staring at her, an odd look on his face. He swallowed and then things seemed to return to normal. "So you wanted to talk about something?"

"Shower and then meet me out on the balcony?" she suggested.

He faked a pout. "Are you saying I smell bad?"

Straight-faced, she nodded. "Yes."

"I'm hurt. But you are right about that. I'll see you on the balcony in twenty."

"Great." She smiled and watched as he gave her a quick wave and headed off, and then she headed to the balcony to wait. It was a nice day, not too hot and not too cold. There was a gentle breeze, but the sunlight cancelled it out and warmed her skin. The water reflected the sunlight up at her and sparkled down below.

Where the water lapped at Atlantis' edges, there were a few more waves. Here they were more like thousands of tiny snow-capped mountains (or an avalanche perhaps), or white horses or whatever that saying was. White horses did have a kind of poetry to it and she could picture the waves as a row of tiny white horses prancing along til they melted and became a part of the ocean around them.

She caught herself staring at the water a few minutes later. The metal of the railing had warmed beneath her fingers and the breeze was pushing her hair back. She shook her head to get some hair out of her face and when that didn't work, she tucked it behind her ears, momentarily letting go of the railing to do so.

Gripping it again, she closed her eyes and breathed in. The air was crisp, clean. It wasn't often back on Earth that she could close her eyes and shut everything out for a few moments and just breathe. The air was too polluted in most places for that. It was different here. Better.

She found herself wondering if she would ever choose to go back. She found herself realising that no, she wouldn't want to return to Earth. Atlantis has become her home and is more a home to her now than anywhere on Earth ever was. The mission team has become her family and friends.

That brought her back to thinking about John and what she was going to say to him. She was still at a loss with that when he arrived, fresh from his shower.

John was smiling. His hair was still wet and spiked up in strange ways that gravity should not allow. He had that just showered scent that men get and he had shaved the bits of beard that had grown while he was on mission. He wore a black shirt and jeans.

She smiled nervously back as he approached and then glanced back out at the water, exhaled and twisted around to face him. "Good shower?"

"Great shower," he confirmed. "It took a lot of scrubbing but I think I got most of the smell away."

"That's good. We still have that debrief session this afternoon."

"Meaning what exactly?" John teased.

"You know what I mean," she said with a smirk.

"I guess I can't argue with your logic. It'll be a much nicer meeting if we're not all holding our noses. Albeit less amusing." He smiled wryly. "I'm now thinking what it would sound like to have Rodney debrief us all while holding his nose. I don't think I could handle the squeaking."

"Let's be glad we won't have to worry about that."

"Oh, I am. I really am," John said. He smirked and then raised his hands above his head, stretching. His shirt stretched against his chest and she allowed herself a quick glance before she looked away and pretended not to have seen. "So what was it you wanted to talk about? Is everything okay, 'lizabeth?"

She sighed. Why did he have to say his name like that? It was just so...

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry. I guess I'm just distracted."

"Okay," he said. "What by?"

She cringed. Tell him or brush it off? She wasn't sure which option would be the best. She did know which the safest way would be, but she didn't want to chicken out now that she had finally done something toward seeing if there was more between them than they both let on.

"Elizabeth?"

Okay. She had to do something. She had to tell him something and fast, before he started to worry. Before he freaked and sent her to see Carson again. She felt her face flushing as she moved closer to him; she could tell he was beginning to grow nervous, which wasn't helping her own nerves at all.

And then she kissed him. She hadn't intended to, just as earlier she hadn't intended on telling John she wanted to talk to him about something. It was the natural next step in her situation, she told herself, and so she just did it. She pulled back after a moment and ducked her head, unsure if she wanted to see John's expression.

What if he didn't feel the same? Why had that not occurred to her before?

She need not have worried.

John gave a short laugh (her heart skipped a few beats and fear went through her) and then he angled her face up and leaned down and kissed her back. It was little more than a chaste kiss, but it gave her an immediate sense of relief.

"You were saying?" he said.

"I was going to, but no," she replied. "I think after that, I don't need to use words."

He smirked and pulled her close again. "Actions, then?"

Fin.