This chapter is a little out there. So you can either thank or blame darylsdiva1 for inspiring me to go with the supernatural in his one. I hope that you enjoy it, Daryl is an endlessly interesting character because he like Roscuro is a mixture of the dark and the light. The book that Carol reads in this story is "The Tale of Desperaux" by Kate DiCamillo. It is a wonderful book and I recommend it to children of all ages. Now of course I don't own that book or any part of TWD, but let the story begin.

The Quest

Daryl sat on his perch at the top of the mountain. It was sunset and he was watching the sun go down on one more day of his self- imposed exile. Two weeks ago he had come up the mountain to watch over his family. It had been a long two weeks.

Daryl had always been interested in American Indian history and folklore; he had always been interested in the concept of vision quest. American Indians had all sorts of different rituals involving the vision quest, but most involved being alone in a natural place, fasting, exposure, and self-reliance. Daryl had been lost in the woods as a young boy and had survived on his own. Daryl had always thought of that as his vision quest; he had found his way back and hadn't been missed. He was stronger for it; he was better on his own.

This vision quest was different; he wasn't a lost little boy trying to survive in the woods. He knew his way around these woods; he wasn't trying to find his home. He could close his eyes and find his way home; this time he was the hunter and he was hunting for the human prey.

The first five days had been the most difficult. He had been hungry, thirsty, and lonely. He had too much time to think and old demons had come back to taunt him. He distracted himself by going back and playing happy memories like his own personal blue-ray player.

Winter at the prison had been easier than on the road. They were cold especially at night, and often a little hungry, but the walkers weren't as active and they found ways to entertain each other. They had combined the prison and Woodbury libraries so lots of reading went on, and at night most people stayed in the commons area where the big wood stove blazed out heat and played chess, checkers, dominoes, and other games. Then, for an hour someone would read aloud while the others listened. He usually stayed back in the cell blocks to keep an eye on things but when it was Carol's turn to read he would find a seat in the corner and work on arrows or something.

One night she started some children's book about some lame ass mouse who could read and who was in love with a princess. He contemplated going back to his perch; he only stayed because he liked watching Carol. Everyone was watching Carol so they wouldn't notice him really watching Carol. Watching the lamp light up her silver hair and the intent expression on her face as she read and smiling at the different voices she used for the different but all lame ass characters. The mouse had an older brother who was trying to make him act like a real mouse that kinda reminded of Merle.

He found himself interested despite himself when the rat showed up in the story. The castle had a dungeon full of rats who seemed content to stay down there and do rat shit all day long. Roscuro was different from the others; he had always wanted to be the light and he got upstairs and thought he was in heaven. He loved it; he was never going back. Shit happened and he went back to the deep downs. He was a rat, and that is where rats live. Daryl knew he was the rat, born in the deep downs and wanting some light for himself.

The book took five nights and Daryl was there for every word. He traded watch time to make it happen. He listened to Carol say every word in that story. He had five nights watching her in lamp light feeling like Roscuro yearning for light in a dungeon full of darkness. The place was filled that last night, the kids sitting on blankets in front of Carol, and the old folks sitting close so that they could hear. Andrea had made cookies for the finish the book party. Finally, it was over, and the kids all hugged Carol and he slipped out to do the watch. He was early but he relieved Rick so that he could go join the others in the commons.

It had been cold that night, but the walkers were quiet and he had time to think about Carol. She had a talent for making the story come alive and the kids had been captivated. He had been too, but he hoped what he got out of the experience wasn't what they did. He wanted her more now than before and before had been bad enough. Roscuro wanted the light and he wanted Carol. He had run off here to hide from that because he might give too much away if he stayed any longer.

He was watching the cold rain turn to snow when he heard her coming up the steps. He knew it was Carol because she was always so quiet on the steps, and he always listened for that sound when he was out here in the dark. She came in with a little bag and a flashlight all excited about the snow. She turned the flashlight out so that it illuminated the falling snow and he looked too so that he didn't look in her face. He would give in all away if he did, his longing and his need for her. She handed him the bag; the smell of cookies in the air suddenly. He thanked her and put the cookies on the table.

Carol put the flashlight down on the table turned so that the light was still pointed outside. They looked at each other; the snow was still on her clothes and hair. He wanted to brush it away but his hard on reminded him that wasn't what he really wanted to do. He wanted to kiss her and put his hands on her underneath all those layers. He wanted to touch her breasts and pull her into him. He wanted her and she was here and the snow falling made everything beautiful.

He moved closer to her and brushed the snow away from her hair. He hands came up involuntarily and touched the sides of her face. Caro put her arms around his arms and inched closer. Then they heard Beth call out for Carol. Hershel needed her and just like that Carol slipped from him and was down the steps. He had been left with the cookies which had really not filled the void. He avoided Carol for a while after that, but a line had been crossed and they both knew it.

Daryl smiled at the memory of his stubborn self; it must be his Southern heritage holding on to the fight when the war was lost. It was odd how he cherished that memory; it didn't go where he wanted it to go, but Carol's face in the dim light from the flashlight had been full of longing. It was the first time she had given herself away to him; the knowing that he wasn't alone in longing made him feel more protective of her. He never wanted anything to hurt Carol and that included him.

Daryl remembered that as a good memory, but darker ones chased their way in too. One cold night about a week ago he had went farther away into the mountain and lit a fire. He just wanted to be warm and had fallen asleep. He wasn't sure what had happened; it might have been a dream but dreams were never that clear and you always forgot most of it. He would never forget the dream or vision or hallucination or whatever the hell it was.

He awoke and the fire was blazing high. He sat up and saw that there were three figures sitting on logs in each direction from him. He noticed that he was on a log too and directly in front of him was Merle, to his right was his mother, and to his left was a figure shrouded in darkness. The firelight did not penetrate the shadows covering him, but he knew who it was, his father.

Daryl spoke, "What are you doing here?" Merle chuckled, "You should know this is your damn vision quest. You called us here from let us say less pleasant circumstances. Let's get this straight from the get-go. We know everything you know, we are here to help you take on this new role that you are so scared about. Now let's get this going, I ain't got all night."

The mother figure spoke and the light shone on her face and she was as she had been before the fire, "Merle, leave your brother alone, he has called us together and for once we are going to be here for him. Carol called him the Care Taker and she knows him better than her knows himself he will be all right with this."

Merle again, "He knows now but he won't admit it. He is hiding up here like a damn pussy pretending to watch over them."

Daryl was pissed, "What is it that I am supposed to know and won't admit? You are talking in riddles and you will take off like you always do and not help one damn bit. Is it about Carol, is there something wrong?"

Merle again, "Mom, how much did you drink when you were carrying him? I told you dumb ass that we only know what you know. We don't know shit from shinola about Carol. This is your vision quest, you know that a change is coming and you will have to face your demons tonight to get through this journey. Now let's get the ole balls rolling so to speak. You and Carol have been bumping uglies for a while, and you didn't follow any of my advice about sex. You didn't do bad; Carol is not going to replace you in that department. Now what is it that your haven't been taking care of in the sack?"

Mom spoke up, "There is a frigging ZA going on, he's been busy."

Merle spoke in a gentler tone, "Daryl, tell me."

Daryl answered, "We haven't been using condoms. Carol never said I had to, she thinks that she might be past getting pregnant anyway."

Merle said, "Daryl, we know what you know. So no use lying to us, you have been throwing millions of your boys at a virtually defenseless oocyte for some damn reason. You wanted her to be pregnant, and now you think that one of those boys may have gotten lucky. You had a real special time on that picnic by the waterfall. Say it boy."

Daryl tried to figure how Merle knew what an oocyte even was or how he knew. He used to watch a lot of Discovery channel, must be it. "That wasn't the only reason I was throwing the boys at the oocyte, but yeah she could be pregnant."

Mom cooed, "You want to be a father, you even wrote it down. I know it didn't have to your seed, but if she is pregnant you need to know that you will be a great father." They all turned toward the dark specter and Daryl could feel the chill coming from the left.

Merle was impatient again, "Okay, you know that you wanted a baby and now you kinda think there is one. Now what is it that you have to face up to?"

Daryl thought that dead Merle was a pain in the ass. This shit took time; what was he afraid of? That was easy. "I am afraid that I will be like him; that I might hurt Carol or our child like he hurt Mom and us."

Mom spoke up, "You are not him, he is like the evil rats in the book. He loved the darkness, liked hurting us and remember what Carol told you about being the Care Taker. You took care of me when you were a little boy. You loved me and I am sorry that I left you. You took care of Merle and he loved you. Don't be afraid of that, you will take care of Carol and your child. It is time for you to let yourself know the truth about how I died. You have known all along that he killed me and set the house on fire. You never told Merle because he would kill your father and Merle would go to jail and leave you."

Daryl let himself feel the anger and pain that he had tamped down, "I knew you weren't drinking that morning when I left. He came back I figured and something got out of hand. I never knew for sure but we kept so many secrets in our family what was one more."

Merle was gentle again, "I loved you more than anything. I was angry with Mom for letting him treat her this way, for hiding in wine so that she didn't face it. I joined her in denial with my drugs of choice. You are stronger than us; you have it in you to be a good father. Feel free to call it Merle if it's a boy. Hell, call it Merle if it's a girl."

Mom spoke again and her voice was sad, "We have to go, you do know that we loved you. You have love all around you now. Your family is better at it than we were. Goodbye, my baby boy."

Merle's voice was almost a whisper, "You have more to go through here; you have one more family member to face. Don't be afraid, little brother. You got this."

Daryl saw Mom and Merle fade away. He felt the chill coming stronger from his left. He turned toward the shadow. He could see his father now; he was standing up and in one hand he had a belt with the buckle shining in the firelight. Daryl stood up.

Darkness said, "Think that you are all grown up and I can't touch you now, don't you, you piece of shit. I should have killed you like I did your mother. You are afraid of me and you know it".

Daryl answered, "Yes, I am afraid of you, you can't hit me with that belt anymore, but I am afraid that somewhere deep inside that I may be like you."

Darkness pushed, "I killed her you know and set her on fire. I liked getting drunk and beating on you, that is why I never stopped." He swung the belt at Daryl and he could feel the sting on his arm and the scars on his back burned like fire. Daryl felt the rush of hate, of fury, and he grabbed his hand knife to stab his father, to kill him, to rid the world of this malignancy.

Suddenly the visage of his father changed and there was a little boy standing there. Daryl was able to turn the knife aside at the last moment. The little boy looked at him with love. "You couldn't hurt a child, you aren't your father. You brought me here to show you that, but I have to go now." The boy reached out his hand and took the knife away and threw it down. He took Daryl's hand just a second and he squeezed it tight. The little boy faded in the now dimming light from the fire.

Daryl sat by the fire until daylight came. He had a cut on his arm, the smell of cigarettes lingered in the air from his mother, and his hand still felt the warmth of his son. He kicked the fire out and went to visit Sam and Dave. He had a shower and they found some clean clothes. They fed him and told him all the news. Daryl asked them to tell Carol that he loved her, he would see her soon, and that he knew and he was very happy about it. Daryl went back up in the mountains to watch over them, but he didn't feel so lonely anymore.