Chapter 23
James was released from the hospital two days later, having recovered quite fast. James was eager to leave the stuffed up hospital room and start living at home again, knowing Carlos missed his roommate and that everyone needed him to take care of Kendall.
James had always been the oldest; it was his job to protect his friends and his family. It was his job to protect Logan, Kendall, and Carlos, and Mrs. Knight and Katie. He had to stay strong for them, he had to, but yet he'd ended up in the hospital for a week or two from almost doing something he wasn't supposed to do.
Drugs. James had always heard about people taking drugs to ease their depression or take away stress, but James had always thought it was stupid. Drugs ruined your lungs, your body, your health, your hair... He never thought he'd want to resort to it.
But it just got too much. He couldn't handle all the depression and the worry for Kendall and his health. He didn't want to be the "dad" of the group anymore; it was exhausting. He would never know how Kendall did it. Literally; he'd never know.
James sighed, wiping a hand over his face to brush his sweaty bangs out of the way. It was really hot outside now that summer had arrived, and in LA, hot meant really hot. James blew air into his face, enjoying the cool air that temporarily cooled his face.
Meanwhile, his other hand was on Carlos's forehead, which felt hotter than the air outside was. Poor Carlos was so hot, he was complaining about being cold in his half-conscious state. James checked his temperature again; 101.8.
"Oh, man, you're burning up, Carlos…" James muttered to himself, leaving the room temporarily to get Logan. The future doctor would know what to do.
"Logan!"
Logan looked up from where he was playing Candyland with Kendall. "What's wrong?"
"Carlos's burning up again. 101.8… that's high, right?" James saw Logan's eyes widen.
"Here, Kendall, why don't you play with James for a while; Logie has to go somewhere, okay?" Logan asked Kendall gently. Kendall nodded happily, handing the blue piece to James, who tried his best to smile at Kendall the way he would have normally a month ago.
"Alrighty, Kendall. Is it your turn?" James asked quietly. Kendall shrugged.
"Don't know. But I'll go." He reached for a card and came up with an orange square. "Ooh! Purple!" He cried happily.
James sighed. "No, Kendall, it's orange. Remember? Orange." He pronounced the word slowly and clearly so Kendall could hear.
Kendall's eyes lit up. "Oh yeah! Orange." He said the word like a drunk person, slurring the letters. He moved his green piece with his hands shakily. His eyes blinked rapidly, and it seemed like it was a challenge to make the precise movement. James felt tears in his eyes. What had happened to Kendall?
Finally, Kendall made the move. James went and got two reds. The game continued for awhile before James finally won. James didn't think twice about winning the game; he didn't know that Kendall would start throwing a tantrum.
"That's not fair! I hate this game!" Kendall pouted, picking up his piece and throwing it against the wall. James flinched, not expecting the sudden act of anger. Kendall had tears in his eyes, and clenched his hands into fists.
"Kendall, buddy, chill out. It's just a game," James muttered, forgetting for a moment that Kendall wasn't the old Kendall anymore. Kendall always used to get mad when he lost, or even when he got second. He was always competitive, always wanted to win first...
Which was how he got himself into this junk in the first place, wasn't it? James sighed when Kendall continued to throw a tantrum. "Alright! We'll call it a tie, okay?" James shouted at last, losing his patience.
Kendall stopped screaming. "No. I won." He stated stubbornly.
James sighed again. "Yes, yes, you won, alright?"
Kendall smiled. "Yay!" He skipped over to the couch, watching the Spongebob show that he'd had on for the past hour and a half.
'James, what's going on?" James turned and saw Logan standing at the door.
"Sorry, he was just throwing a tantrum cuz I won the game." James told Logan quietly, trying not to notice how strange that sounded. Kendall throwing a tantrum. Before, it would've been more likely that a pig could fly.
"It's fine, it's just that Kendall kind of woke Carlos up and now his fever is even higher and I don't know what to do and-" Logan stopped, pacing around the room, his breathing coming out in short gasps.
"Oh, man, why can't I do anything right? I don't know where the medicine is, or where Katie is, or-" James clamped a hand over the hyperventilating boy's mouth.
"Logan, relax. You're doing great. The medicine's in the top cabinet on the right of the sink, and Katie and Mrs. Knight are out at Starbucks, remember?" James reassured the smart boy. Logan looked relieved and grateful for James's reminders.
"Oh yeah. Sorry, I'm just… I'm just tired, ya know?" Logan sighed, sitting down on a chair. James nodded. Oh yeah, he knew.
"Here, why don't you go and get some rest; I'll take care of them, okay?" James suggested, though he didn't know how he would take care of Kendall and Carlos at the same time. But Kendall would've been able to; why couldn't he?
Logan looked at him. "Really? You sure you'll be fine?" He asked.
James nodded. "I'm sure. I don't want you stressing yourself, Logie. Alright? Go and get some rest, okay?" Logan nodded slowly when he heard the confidence in James's voice. Confidence that James wasn't even sure he had.
"Thanks, man." Logan smiled.
James patted him on the back. "No problem, buddy."
When Logan left, James just sat watching Kendall laugh at the TV. It was the laugh of a little kid, not a teenage boy, but James tried to ignore that.
James tried to ignore everything.
But when he heard the sound of harsh coughing, he knew he couldn't avoid the harsh realities of his life. Carlos was sick and Kendall was sick. Except Carlos would get better…
And Kendall wouldn't.
James smacked himself lightly on the head. Stop thinking about that… He told himself sternly, sounding like his mom for a moment. Stop thinking about Kendall.
Seeing as said boy was fine on the couch, James went to check on the other boy he was worried about. When he put his hand on Carlos's forehead, he had to pull away from the burning heat emitting from it.
Carlos needed to bring his fever down, or they'd have to take another trip to the hospital. And James knew none of them wanted to go into that place again. Not so soon.
James left the room, dug up some not expired Tylenol from the medicine cabinet, poured some in the medicine thingy (only Logan knew what it was called), and brought it back into Carlos's room.
He really didn't want to wake Carlos up, but he had no choice. Not if he wanted to avoid the hospital at all costs. "Carlos, wake up, pal."
Carlos stirred a little, whimpering softly. James shook him again and again until finally, he cracked open his tired eyes. "J-James?" He whispered hoarsely.
James brushed Carlos's hair out of his eyes. "Buddy, you're really burning up. Can you sit up and drink this medicine for me?" Carlos rubbed his eyes, coughed loudly, and sat up. He put his hand on his head, whimpering again.
James knew Carlos was really sick when he drank the sticky liquid with no complaint. Carlos would always complain about drinking icky medicine, but not this time. "Wh-where's Logie?" Carlos asked quietly, laying back down.
"Sleeping. He's been real tired lately." James told him, sticking the thermometer into Carlos's ear. 102.3.
"T-taking care of me, right?" Carlos asked, looking guilty for being sick. James just hated it when Carlos was so selfless. He was worrying about Logan when he was the one with the 102 degree fever.
"Carlos, it's not your fault. It's… it's just the situation, ya know? Logan doesn't mind, but his body does sometimes. Don't blame yourself for this." Carlos looked like he wanted to say more, but his exhaustion got the better of him.
"Sleep tight, buddy. You'll be better by tomorrow." James said, trying to convince himself. With a fever this high, Carlos probably wouldn't be better for a couple of days
But that was still better than Kendall, who-
"Shut up!" James hissed at himself, cursing his thoughts. He had to stop thinking about Kendall. He just had to stop thinking at all. Right now, all that mattered was taking care of his brothers, and Kendall's family. And Kendall, of course. He couldn't keep himself occupied with horrid thoughts.
He was glad Carlos didn't hear him talking to himself. The smaller boy was fast asleep, his breathing uneven but not life-threatening. Unlike Kendall, who-
James wanted to bang his head against a wall.
A/N- Hey, guys! Hope you haven't given up on this story yet… cuz the reviews are going down. But whatever, I love writing the story! You all know the drill by now…
REVIEW? PLEASE? It means so much to me, I don't care if it's one word or a thousand (isn't that past the limit you can write, though?) Whatever, who's gonna write something THAT long anyways?
P.S. BTR's gonna be on MARVIN MARVIN! ON February 23rd, I think. That's what Wikipedia said. But who can trust that? ;)
Peace, Love, and Giraffes,
Anonymous Skrtle
