I originally put this as complete but then I couldn't stop thinking about writing the silver knight's point of view. I hadn't planned on posting it but now I kind of like it so here it is.
Quite a lot of frustration in this one as well, but I still wanted them to be different, it's so very AU that I tried to keep as much personality as I could. I am not a big fan of AU but this story wouldn't leave me alone and hey, sometimes it's good to try something new :)
So the same warnings goes for this one and I don't own Cats or (the few) lyrics I borrowed from Arctic Monkeys.
He really shouldn't. But there was something about Alonzo. Something he couldn't put his finger on. Alonzo was everything he normally never fell for. Honestly, he never fell for anyone. He was too busy taking care of others to even think about things like that. But that night his brother had convinced him to come to that party, only to forget about him the minute they entered, of course.
He had thought about leaving but then his eyes locked for a second with a tom across the room. And for no reason at all he looked away again and felt his cheeks flush a little. He felt silly and glanced over at the tom again only to find him still looking at him. The other tom gave him a crooked smile and a nod before he turned his gaze back to his friends.
Something had taken a leap in his stomach. He had no idea how he would do anything about it, he hadn't tried to pick someone up in years, he had barely attended a party in years. He got caught looking a few more times and it started to get awkward. He knew nobody and now the only person he had any contact with that evening thought he was some kind of nervous stalker. He was just about to get up and leave when he saw the tom saying something to his friends and then start walking towards him. The other tom looked so confident and he could feel some of it rub off on him.
"So Tugger abandoned you for the night?" he had asked.
"Yeah, thank you for saving me" he answered with a laugh.
"Please, you are the one saving me from the boring conversations over there, you're not boring are you?" the tom had said in a flirtatious tone and cocking an eyebrow. He could feel himself shake his head smiling from ear to ear. He swore to himself he would never be boring again if that made the other tom look at him like that.
They had talked for the rest of the evening. What about he had no idea but conversation just came so easily. He suspected that the other tom might not be entirely sober, a thing that normally would make him disgusted but with Alonzo it seemed less important. 'Ah Alonzo' he thought and smiled. They hadn't introduced themselves when they started talking and he felt really awkward when he was leaving and didn't know how to ask for his name. He felt himself wanting to meet him again but had no idea how to go about it. He picked up his phone to check the time again, maybe he could stay a little longer. And then it was gone, the other tom had snatched it out of his paw with a cheeky smile and started typing in his name. Surprised, he looked down at the table and picked up the other tom's forgotten phone and quickly entered his number. Alonzo's confidence had once again transferred over to him and he decided to leave him hanging a bit with the name until he was sober and dared to call and ask for it. He could not in a million years explain what had possessed him to lean in close as he returned the phone and whisper in his ear. It took all his willpower to not kiss the other tom, but he couldn't keep from brushing his lips against his ear as he left. The tingling sensation it left stayed for days.
And then nothing. He had been so certain that he had made an impression on the other tom, but there was no word from Alonzo. He felt silly for expecting more, and the more he thought about it he got worried that the other tom didn't even remember the evening. 'What if he was higher up in the clouds than I thought?' he reasoned and tried to let it go. Four days later he had settled for it not going further. All in all he'd had a good night, he went to a party, met someone and had fun the whole time 'That's a pretty good night in my book' he had thought. He didn't really have time for something more anyway. And then Alonzo called, of course.
They had met up a couple of times and had a great time every time. He wanted more though. It got painfully clear as he felt himself zone out several times while Alonzo spoke just looking at him. Taking in everything that he normally never was attracted to but that with Alonzo just made him want to push him up against a wall and kiss him. The black patch over his eye that almost made him look like he had a black eye, his lean figure that looked strong but didn't really show any muscles, and how he never called him by his name. Always silver knight, or my knight. He hated nicknames, but every time Alonzo said them his knees got weak.
But he always stiffened up a bit when he thought Alonzo might try to take the initiative with a kiss. He felt himself doubting if he really wanted to get involved with someone who occasionally got high. Though every other cell in his body shouted yes, those few who didn't seemed to be enough to kill the mood for the moment. They met up some more times and he was surprised Alonzo kept wanting to see him even though they never did anything more than talk. That first evening he had thought the other tom was quite the heartbreaker with the confidence radiating from him like that, he had definitely done things like these before. He wasn't so sure how long that interest would last, at this pace they might have to grow old together before they even kissed. Alonzo had called him a few late nights though. Having been obviously under some influence and never making much sense but he could hear that it was partly because the other tom didn't know what to say. Those nights he had just hung up on him and decided that he was done with this. It usually lasted until the next evening and he always hated himself for coming crawling back when he knew he shouldn't.
This evening he had been itching to send a text for hours even though he had decided once again that he would let this go. He didn't have time for this and the sooner he could just move on the better. He picked up the phone again and looked at the time, just after eleven, it started getting too late to meet up. It was probably too late already but he thought he might play it off as if he'd already been out and thought about Alonzo. He wanted to meet the real Alonzo, to be certain that he looked into clear eyes and then he would kiss him. His palms got a bit sweaty at the thought. He had wanted that all along, just taste him. See if there was anything else he normally never liked that would seem just perfect with Alonzo. To feel his paws grab him in surprise by the kiss and then taking over. Alonzo was just a bit shorter and a lot leaner and lighter than himself, but he wanted him to push him back. Grabbing him hard and shoving him against the nearest wall and just do whatever he felt like. He wanted to melt into Alonzo's touch and just feel.
"I'll just ask him straight out" he said to himself and started to write a text. He felt a bit stupid using the phrase 'flying your kite' but even though he wanted a straight answer he couldn't find a way to ask without it sounding like an accusation. This was as close as he got. He sent the text and put his phone down resolutely. The prospect of meeting up and take this further made him both terrified and excited. He got up and decided to change his clothes in case he got a positive response. Almost immediately when he got to the wardrobe he realised the sound was off on his phone and he hurried back to turn it on. No answer yet, but it had barely been sent for two minutes so no worries about that. He went back to the wardrobe and tried to pick something out that looked casual but still good. He cursed himself twenty minutes later when he couldn't decide between two almost identical shirts and realised he was just nervous, it didn't really matter. And then he realised that he hadn't even got an answer yet. He decided to go check the phone just in case, but no it was the same as before. He checked an extra time that he had actually sent the text, and then restarted his phone just in case. Nothing. Sweat broke out as he thought he might have offended Alonzo and that he therefore didn't answer. He opened the text again trying to analyse whether or not he sounded rude or just joking. He couldn't think of any better way to get a straight answer without asking straight out. As it got closer to midnight he felt miserable and decided to go to bed instead hoping that Alonzo just hadn't seen the text. He climbed into bed and was just about to turn the lights off when the phone made a sound. He dropped it on the floor before picking it up and opening the text.
The disappointment washed over like a bucket of cold water. The text was barely readable. At first he just stared at it. Then he got angry. 'Well this was just perfect, just the straight answer I was asking for' he thought. But not the one he had hoped for he admitted feeling more sad than angry now. I am already home he sent back for some reason he didn't know. He should just leave this, erase the number and forget him. Forget Alonzo, not likely. Whatever that tom had he was helpless around it. He read the answer and found himself smiling. Oh how he would love some company now. He felt himself blushing as he thought what could happen if he said yes. But he couldn't. He wanted to do this when he'd be certain that Alonzo remembered it. He chuckled a bit. The nerve in that tom. And as always with Alonzo he should have been put off but instead he felt himself wanting more. Call me tomorrow, when you have landed he wrote and hoped it didn't sound too bitter. He still wanted to see him. He needed to give this a shot before Alonzo got bored. He got a text back assuring him he'd only been sleepy. "Yeah right" he said out loud but smiled at the little 'sleep tight'. He was tempted to write something back but decided that if he didn't put his phone away now he might be persuaded to invite him over. 'Not tonight, tomorrow though' he thought and went back to bed with a smile on his lips.
But he couldn't fall asleep. 'What if he really just had been sleepy?' and still he had wanted to come over. He couldn't help but thinking he had blown it. Sure he got a cute text back, but then he hadn't answered. He had to chew the inside of his cheek to not send another text wishing him good night. 'Maybe writing something about having sweet dreams of him' he thought but could not find a single way to say that without making it sound incredibly corny. And it would be about half an hour too late. Still he couldn't fall asleep. His mind kept wandering off to what would be if Alonzo was there right now. He shifted in his bed as he thought about that crooked smile that would meet him when he opened the door. He tried to absorb some of the confidence Alonzo always had around his every movement. And he knew that he would not be able to contain himself. This time he would just walk up to him and put his paw in the back of his neck and pull him in for a kiss. He could almost feel the way Alonzo would be surprised before he caught on and from there he would be happy to hand over the wheel and just enjoy the ride.
These thoughts did nothing to help him sleep. Actually he felt something waking up instead. "Ugh" he sighed to himself. This was not what he felt like doing right now. But his body kept disagreeing with that and 'Whatever' he thought. It felt kind of nice imagining what Alonzo's body would feel like pushed against his. Ah, that smile, and those eyes. He imagined them as they had been that first night after he had whispered in his ear. Almost nothing but pupils, black with lust. He firmly pushed the thought about them being dilated for another reason to the side and felt something press against the front of his pants thinking that he could have that effect on someone else. He let on paw slip lower under his sheets letting it rest on the outside of his pants. Debating with himself on whether it was worth it or not. Fiddling with a seam of the pants like it had nothing to do with the friction it made below the fabric. He had been left with this for the last year since he never bothered to date anyone and it usually satisfied him well enough. But something about the possibility of having someone else doing that to him being not that far off made him hesitate. He realised he was bucking his hips up still trying to convince himself that he wasn't already doing this. He gave in and 'oh, that felt brilliant' he thought and let out a moan. He didn't bother to take his time, this was just getting something physical out of his system. He closed his eyes and let the image of Alonzo grabbing his hips and grinding them together with his push him over the edge.
That had been fine, not great, but still. 'A quick shower and then some sleep' he decided and pulled himself up. He got up and into the shower and instead of short shower he turned the heat up a bit more and lingered. He relaxed and leaned against the wall, letting the water wash away all tension. He really wished he had tried Alonzo a bit more, if he had just been sleepy and had wanted to come over it would have been nothing short of amazing, but the odds of that were slim. And he really shouldn't bother with this. Before he met Alonzo he would always just walk out when someone was high, even mentioning they had tried it made it hard for him to respect them. With Alonzo it didn't feel like that big of a deal, but he didn't want to be around him at those times. 'Tomorrow will have to do' he thought and turned the shower off. It didn't do any good to think about what could have been, and especially not since he wanted to be well rested for what could be. He had just dried himself off, decided to skip the pants and crawled into bed when his phone made another sound. He grabbed it before the sound was over and opened it. Aren't the nights mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day? We could be together… If you want to, he read and felt his palms getting sweaty again. 'Did he really mean that?' he thought smiling to himself and then as if on queue the phone rang. He rolled his eyes thinking immediately that he only called like this when he was high. There was no second signal and he hoped that maybe Alonzo had pushed the wrong button. He decided to just ask this time, might as well get a straight answer now.
Why do you only call me when you're high? He typed and took a deep breath before sending it. If he wasn't he would probably be offended, but if he was? 'I probably won't care' he realised. He wanted this tom. Not because of his bad habits, but in spite of them. 'He wanted'- his thoughts got cut off by another text.
Fuck, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up.. Can I call? The tone in the text held nothing of Alonzo's usual confidence. In fact, it sounded desperate, pleading. He closed his eyes with a frown knowing he shouldn't fall for it, but he was helpless. Sure. He sent back and sat up, wrapping the cover around his waist. He felt a bit too naked even though he was alone. When the call came he hesitated an extra signal before answering.
"Yeah?" he answered and it was silent in the other end. "Hello?" he tried and heard Alonzo clear his throat.
"Sorry I woke you up" said Alonzo quietly.
"I couldn't sleep anyway" he answered and it got silent again. He decided to just say it. "Are you high?" he asked trying to keep his voice steady.
"Yes.. I'm sorry.. I was just.. I wanted to… I can't even talk, I can't do this on the phone, just forget I called… Can I get a second chance tomorrow? Please?" Alonzo begged and he sounded miserable.
"Would it be easier to talk if you came over?" he found himself asking before he could think it through.
"Now?" asked Alonzo surprised. 'And hopeful?' he thought.
"Yeah.. If you want to?" he added.
"I'm already on my way" answered Alonzo and he could hear scrambling in the background. "Give me, like ten minutes or something?" Alonzo continued and he could hear him swear at his shoes for not fitting.
"Sure, I'll wait" he answered with a smile and hung up.
'I'm an idiot' he thought to himself smiling even wider.
Ugh I think this needs a third chapter.. I can't be the only one wanting to hear Alonzo scream out the silver knights real name in pleasure? (you do know who he is, right?). I might give it a try.
