I Was Alive When You Were Right Here By My Side Part 1

Haruka closed his eyes as he sunk deeper in the tub. He was trying to think of everything and anything to keep to Rin off his mind. But right now, it was just too fresh. His conclusions were all too new. Haruka knew that any chance of a relationship with Rin was dead. All that Rin saw in Haruka was a twisted nuisance form of a rival.

Then, Haruka heard ringing outside of the doors of the bathroom. It was his cellphone. Haruka tried to ignore the ringing but after the fourth time it went through its cycle, it forced him to get out of the bath and try to find his rarely used cellphone. As his search begin, Haruka wondered who it was that insisted on calling him over and over again. The most logical guess was either his parents or Makoto, but seeing as his parents rarely called him and that Makoto had seen Haruka practical run out of Samezuka, it had to be Makoto.

Finally, Haruka located in cellphone that was hiding in between two couch cushions.

"Hey" Haruka said picking up the phone.

"Haru, thank god" Makoto said sounding relieved. "I just wondered if you wanted me to come over or something. There's this movie that I think you might like. I could bring it over"

Makoto always reminded Haruka that he was so stupid for worrying so much about Rin. Compared to Makoto and everyone else on the swim team for that matter, he shouldn't even bother trying to have a relationship with Rin again. It was just too much effort with no chance of reward. And it was then that Haruka decided he'd tried to forget Rin. Because if Rin didn't need Haruka, Haruka certainly didn't need Rin.

"Okay" Haruka answered.

From that moment, Haruka became a little happier, thoughts of Rin started to fade away a little bit, and he was able to sleep a little bit more. Of course, it would have been all to easy if things stayed that way.

As Rin walked away from practically attacking outside of the swim shop. Haruka kept his cool as best as possible, but as soon as Rin was out of sight, Haruka slinked down to the ground. He could feel his body shaking.

I did good standing up for myself right? Haruka thought.

But what did this mean for Haruka? If he swam for Rin, once it was over, whatever Haruka meant to Rin now would disappear. And no matter how much Haruka lied to himself that he was over Rin, he wanted to mean something to him. Haruka wanted to be more than just Rin's rival but how could he get him to understand.

It was finally the night before the tournament. For the first time, in a long time, Haruka was nervous about something. Even big tests or presentations never bothered him because he knew that if prepared enough, there would be no problems. But racing was inherently different because so much as a late start could lose you the race.

The next morning, as Haruka and Makoto walked location of the tournament, Haruka played out many situations in his head. If Rin won, it'd be pretty obvious how things would go. Haruka only lightly dabbled in the idea of Rin winning. He didn't want to make himself depressed before the race had even begun.

So Haruka went on to thinking about if he won against Rin. Chances were, they would be right back to where they started. Still, Haruka tried to think of a positive end to this tournament but couldn't think of anything plausible. Haruka sighed and he noticed Makoto looking over with slight concern.

"Everything okay?" Makoto asked Haruka casually. He just nodded and hoped that would satisfy Makoto. Whether or not Haruka was really okay or not, but up for debate.

But there was no question how Haruka felt after the race.


Floating on his back, Haruka's heart sunk deeper. He tried to close his eyes and tried to escape Rin's face but that just made things worse. All Haruka wanted was to swim with Rin again. He just couldn't understand why the universe wouldn't grant his one stupid request. But instead it fought him, tore his emotions apart, and screamed at Haruka to stay away from Rin.

But worst of all, the memory that was making rounds in his mind was on that didn't even make sense. It was when they were kid's and they had just finished burying the trophy after the relay.


"Hey Haru" Rin said getting his attention.

Haruka normally wouldn't put up with an annoying situation like this but Rin was leaving tomorrow so Haruka decided to act nice.

"What is it Rin, didn't we already have group goodbyes?"

Rin looked away and scratched his head. "Well, I was hoping you'd swim with me one more time" he asked. "Not like a race or anything, just normal a swim"

Haruka shrugged his shoulders, there was no reason to deny a request involving swimming and it looked like Rin had a lot to say so hopefully, Haruka wouldn't have to do much.

Sliding back into the cool water, the lane lines were still up seeing as the tournament ended not even a half hour ago. But before Haruka could fully submerge himself, Rin cannonballed into the water, getting Haruka's mostly dry face soaking wet.

Yep, Haruka was definitely okay with Rin leaving.

After pulling himself under the water, Haruka let his thoughts go and just let the water due what it does best. Then when Haruka raised his head for a breath he found himself face to face with Rin. Haruka didn't normally get embarrassed, but he could feel the heat from his face rise a little when he realized the situation he was in.

"What? Are you trying to ask me something Haru?" Rin asked not sounding embarrassed in the least. "Or are you finally going to confess how much you're going to be miss me when I move to Australia"

Haruka quickly looked away. "Of course not". He tried his best to hide the sudden emotions Haruka happened upon. "Why do you want to swim with me in the first place?"

"Hm, well I guess out of everyone, I consider to be closest to you"

That almost made Haruka choke on air. Why did it have to be Haruka? Compared to Makoto's and Nagisa's kindness, Haruka was practically a bully. Haruka must have been making a face because Rin started laughing. Which made Haruka react by splashing Rin's face with water and started an epic water fight between the two boys.

Eventually it just ended in laughs from the both of them but Haruka still kind of felt the whole thing was kind of stupid. Swimming back, Rin looked like he was going to say something but in some impossible way slipped started falling pretty close to Haruka. It was too late by the time Haruka found out just how close Rin was. The feeling of lips against his own was finally able to register that he was kissing Rin.


A/N: Thanks for taking the time to read this chapter! I really appreciate all the support you guys give me, it means a lot! And sorry this is a few days late, I promise, I had this all typed up on Sunday ready to go but as I was editing I realized that it wasn't as well written as I wanted it to be so I had to take these last two days and re-write some parts to try to give you guys the best story possible. So hopefully that won't happen next week, fingers crossed!