Fire, Earth, Water, Air; the four elements that were used harmoniously to create the perfect dough needed for both Peppino and Chef Kawasaki to use as a vessel for their future toppings. On a mission and on a budget, the two chefs requested the assistance of both Neco-Arc and Noise, who were sent out of New Donk City to a nearby area called "Tomato Town". Having reassured Peppino that they would get him the tomatoes he needed, Noise and Neco-Arc decided to save what little Pizza Points that Chef Kawasaki had given them once they saw the tomato residents who were out in town.
Having just wiped out all the ten residents from Tomato Town, the two violent gremlins spent their allotted money on fast food before coming back to Kitchen Shiitake with several glass jars filled with tomato sauce; all of which were looted and emptied, before being used to store the blood of their victims. With the dough refrigerated and ready to be sauced up, Peppino removed the plastic wrapping from the would-be crust before he and the orange-blob smothered the top of it in the tomato-blood of innocents. Confident in the abilities of Noise and Neco-Arc to collect more ingredients, Chef Kawasaki lent them the remainder of his pizza points before asking them to back out into the city, in order to purchase the necessary toppings.
It took them about ten minutes of leaping from skyscraper-to-skyscraper before the devious duo found a Walmart that was open in the wee-hours of the night. Originally having planned on committing a shoplifting spree, both Noise and Neco-Arc were immediately deterred by the idea once they stepped inside and were greeted by an employee who had been given the unfortunate assignment of checking receipts. Listening to Linkin Park blaring over Walmart Radio, Noise and Neco-Arc grabbed a shopping cart and began going down the aisles of the grocery section; the two of them screaming out in horror the moment they saw a Pizza Boy cardboard cutout near the frozen section.
Shaken to their cores, both of the short little characters were trembling as they moved their cart over to one of the many self-checkout kiosks. Scanning their items and bagging all of them by themselves, Noise took out his pocket of pizza point coins before sliding them into the machine one-by-one; his manic gaze scanning the area around him, as the thought of Pizzahead or Pizzaface popping up out of nowhere kept the two on high alert, even as they made their way out of the store and through the parking lot.
Holding both of the grocery bags while Neco-Arc was walking alongside him, Noise looked over from the corner of his eye to see that the short cat-girl was still sweating bullets down her wide-eyed face, as the two of them walked through the aisle of cars underneath the outdoor tall rows of light posts. "... Hey cat, why are you still shaken up? You've never seen what Pizzahead looked like when he was younger, so why did ya freak out in there?"
"Nyaanu…! I've only seen his younger self inside of records held within the Moon Cell," Neco-Arc explained with a shiver; her crimson eyes looking straight ahead, while oblivious to the intrigued look that Noise was giving her.
"There it is again… "Moon Cell"… You keep saying that, like I'm supposed to know what that is," Noise commented with a dry chuckle, as he and the cat-girl left the vicinity of the parking lot. "What is the "Moon Cell", and what's it got to do with Pizzahead?"
Keeping her guard up while the two of them were walking down the mostly vacant road that would take them back into the metropolitan area of inner New Donk City, Neco-Arc needed a moment to think before knowing how to word her response properly. "How do I put this… Okay, soooo the "Moon Cell" is this super-duper high-tech computer, and it's made of these interdimensional conduits known as "photonic crystals"; basically, it's able to transfer and load photons that have data within them."
"Photons, eh? Yeah, okay what you're saying is that the Moon Cell utilizes electromagnetic radiation that's been quantified. These photonic crystals must have dense nano-structures in order for quantum entanglement to take place on a multiversal scale… Meaning technically that the Moon Cell itself would classify as a hyperverse in of itself of at least the fifth dimension, right?" Noise asked, while being met with a small-pupil stare from the confused cat-girl who had no idea what he was talking about.
"Nyaaa… I-I don't know, m-maybe?" Neco-Arc replied back with an uncertain tone in her voice, to which made Noise let out a disappointed sigh as the inner academic within him was let down. "I'm not very good at all that science mumbo-jumbo… But basically, it's a pseudo-intelligent being, kind of like an AI, that uses the same kind of projection stuff as holograms to emulate magic; with the underlying difference being that the Moon Cell's hologram projections can interact with the real world, and whatever universe it creates in its "reality marbles". These "reality marbles" exists within the spiritual computer system that's in the Moon Cell; that whole shabang-bang is known as the "Serial Phantasm", or just " .PH" for short," Neco-Arc replied with a helpful description of what the Moon Cell was capable of; proving to Noise that she wasn't as dumb as he thought she was.
"Okay, enough about what it is. How did Pizzahead find it, and what's his plan with it?" Noise asked, as the two of them stopped at the corner of an intersection, in order to wait for the crosswalk sign to signal for them to walk across the street.
"Nya… I can't say for certain what Pizzahead's intentions are, since I'm not sure how much of the Moon Cell he changed. But, what you might find interesting is that the Moon Cell— or "Pizza Castle", as he's renamed it— did perform a scan on him after he did whatever to it, and update an earlier record that it had on him," Neco-Arc offered, as the crosswalk sign finally changed; allowing for them on the few other night owls to cross the street safely.
"Sure, if you wouldn't mind telling me," Noise replied, as he and the cat-girl began walking deeper into the inner city; all of the colorful neon signs and street lights illuminating the way for them both, as they continued on their way back to the restaurant.
"Buranyaa~! I knew you couldn't resist," Neco-Arc said playfully, before focusing back on their conversation. "So magic, or "magi", used to exist up until about nineteen-seventy, at least within the Moon Cell's home universe. Get this, the first recorded instance of Pizza Boy and his older brother, "Pizza Bro" showing up in that universe was around the year nineteen-twenty. According to the record I read up on, before you and Peppino arrived within the Pizza Castle, Pizza Boy and Pizza Bro had gotten into some funky hijinks, and ended up crash landing on the Moon, after building a "Pizza Rocket"."
"Really? You know this because the Moon Cell records history, I'm guessing?" Noise asked with a raised brow, while Neco-Arc cutely nodded her head. "Where in the Pizza Castle were you able to access these records? Sounds to me like they would be useful in helping us take down Pizzahead."
"Nyaaa~! You would think, buuuuuuut all of the records within the Moon Cell's leftover data were deleted to make room for a bunch of files that Pizzahead has locked behind an encryption-thingy. The only records that are available within the Pizza Castle's mainframe are records about his accomplishments," Neco-Arc informed with a shrug, before quickly adding "Oh! And there's a bunch of computer rooms scattered within the halls I've explored; they're just in hidden areas, kind of like secret rooms!"
"Secret rooms and trying to brand himself in a positive light only? Tch, yeah, that sounds like Pizzahead, alright," Noise muttered with a dry and cynical voice, as he mentally envisioned seeing the smug-careless grin on Pizzahead's cheesy face. "Guh, what an asshole… Anyway, how did Pizza Boy and Caesar get back home, once they crash landed on the Moon?"
"... Caesar? Who's Caesar?" Neco-Arc asked with a derpy smile on her catty face.
"Uh… He's Pizzahead's brother; or was, at least… He's the guy you were referring to as "Pizza Bro"," Noise answered with a perplexed look on his face 'Wow… First that jerk murders his own brother, and now Pizzahead wants him to be remembered only as some second-banana who was part of his old franchise? Talk about a megalomaniac…'
"Oh? I don't remember that name popping up anywhere within Pizzahead's records," Neco-Arc explained, after having to think about whether the name "Caesar" sounded familiar to her or not. "Anyway, Pizza Boy and Pizza Bro ended up getting roped into an event that the .PH was holding amongst its universe's most magically gifted users called "Masters"…"
"... Nine-hundred and ninety-nine participants, one-hundred and twenty-eight Masters who battled in a tournament format; all of which had their souls digitalized in order to enter the Moon Cell; the losers' souls deleted forever if they lost… The winner would obtain entrance into the core of the Moon Cell itself, in which then they would be able to harness the power of the Moon Cell to grant their wish," Neco-Arc explained with a serious tone that made Noise feel uncomfortable at the thought of his very soul being deleted from existence.
"Geez, that sounds cut-throat to me… And you're telling me that Pizza Boy and Caesar went through that, and got their hands bloodied for their ticket back home?" Noise asked with furrowed brows, to which Neco-Arc replied by simply nodding at his question. "I guess that explains the origin of Pizzahead's psychopathic behavior… Makes sense that he would come back for another wish; that guy's never satisfied with what he has."
"Nyaa~! That's the thing! He's been in the Moon Cell a grand total of three times! There was a time back in nineteen eighty-seven when Pizzahead and his brother came back, and participated in the next Holy Grail War; there they befriended a young girl named Hakuno Kishinami, and actually helped her win the entire tournament," Neco-Arc recalled, as she remembered feeling surprised after having read that tidbit for the first time. "The record didn't mention why they came back in the first place, but it did say that Kishinami-Chan shared her power with them, so that they could go back home for a second time."
"... Aw geez, so we don't have any idea what Pizzahead did during that time? Great, that would have made things too easy for us, if we knew what he knew," Noise muttered sarcastically, as he found himself unable to do anything with all of the information that Neco-Arc had given him. "And then finally the third and final time he showed his ugly mug was when he came in, guns-blazing… I don't even know anything about that "Holy Cannoli" thing he's got, but if that thing alone was strong enough to help him brute-force his way into getting more wishes… Then we're kind of screwed, ain't we?"
"Nyaga… Maybe. Maybe not. I sort of think our chances are looking pretty good right now," Neco-Arc argued with an optimistic tone in her voice.
"Oh yeah? And why's that, you dopey-eyed sap?" Noise asked rudely, as he couldn't help but to allow for his cynical side to interfere with the somewhat friendly discussion that he and Neco-Arc were having up until that point. And before the cat-girl could respond to his snarky question, the two of them froze as they felt the ground shake underneath their feet. "Shhh! Hey… Something's comin…" Noise whispered with a warry voice, as he slowly shoved the bags of groceries into his costume's impossibly-deep pocket; freeing his hands, as both he and Neco-Arc kept their eyes up, toward the direction of where the thunderous footsteps were coming from.
In the distance, the duo could see crowds of late-night pedestrians scurrying away from the ten-meter tall mechanical bipedal emerging from the corner of a skyscraper. Its skeletal-metal chassis appeared elegant with its crimson and gold timing along its steel armor, as it swung its nine-foot long bladed-fingers at one individual with a chainsaw head, who had tried to attack it head on. Using its long metal fingers to block the chainsaw headed man's attack, the large metal being cackled as the cannon that was mounted onto its body like a scorpion's tail shot out a beam of cyan-energy into his opponent's body; flash frying him, and transforming him into a lifeless trophy that it caught midair with its clawed hand.
"Nice night for a stroll, isn't it? Who would have guessed that I'd stumble upon another puny would-be hero… I'm sure this one will fetch me a fine price, heh!" The sentient mecha chuckled to himself; its red glowing eyes staring menacingly at its prize, before carefully setting it down on the ground by his large metal feet. "Now where's the other o- Ah, there's the human," the mecha spoke aloud in a sadistic voice, as it turned its white-armored head over toward the bus stop.
Looking over to where the mecha's optic sensors were pointed at, Noise and Neco-Arc saw a petite young woman with short brown hair who had been hiding behind the aforementioned bus stop; her eyes widening in horror, as she heard the metal monster's thunderous footsteps draw closer. "W-WAIT! WAIT, I'M JUST A FAST-FOOD WORKE- AHHHHHH!" The young woman with her brown-ponytail wailed out, before sprinting toward Noise and Neco-Arc, as the metal being behind her was quickly catching up to her.
Upon seeing the derpy eye smile of Neco-Arc, and the confused and cautious look behind Noise's mask, the young Japanese woman's panicked mind quickly jumped to the conclusion that the short duo were her only hope. "HELP, H-HELP MEEEEEE!" The woman begged from the top of her lungs; her face covered in beads of sweat, as she dashed forward at subsonic speeds; stopping only when Noise and Neco-Arc were separating the metal monster from getting to her. "P-Please! Y-You two gotta save me; t-this thing's trying to kill me!"
Uninterested in getting involved with whatever was going on between the young woman and the mechanical nightmare that was now towering over them, Noise calmly raised his arms up before speaking. "Look guys, this isn't really OUR business, and we've got places to be, so… We're gonna head out, okay? Okay," Noise said firmly with an annoyed tone, before grabbing Neco-Arc's arm to begin dragging the spacey-minded cat-girl behind him, leaving behind a devastated Japanese girl, who was staring back at him with a look of betrayal and frustration.
Before he could get more than a few feet forward, Noise suddenly took action the moment he noticed the thirty-foot tall metal monster raising its massive-armored foot up and over his head. Hearing the Japanese girl beginning to hyperventilate behind him, Noise tightened his hold on Neco-Arc's wrist as he swung her body horizontally to parry the mecha's foot, before it could stomp all three of them into the ground. "What the…? Ergh, you little maggots need to learn when you're being stepped on!" The metal being shouted in an angered tone, before attempting to stomp down on the three of them once again; this time putting more power behind his downward foot.
Parrying the attack with the help of Neco-Arc's face once again, Noise was beginning to grow irritated, as he watched the mecha stumble backwards away from them. "I thought I told ya already, you "Oversized Toaster", I ain't buying what you're selling!" Noise shouted angrily back at the thirty-foot tall goliath, while raising Neco-Arc's body up as though she were his sword. "So beat it, or I'll tear your copper wiring out of your robot-ass!"
Unamused by the threatening words that the costumed man shouted at him, the mecha's glowing red eyes intensified as it began to flex its sharp claws in anticipation. "You're beginning to get on my bad side, you puny little human…! Tell me, because I really, really have to know: What's your name, freak?" The mecha asked in a loud, booming voice; frightening the already petrified woman behind Noise, while he narrowed his eyelids back at the metal being before him.
"Noise… You can call me "Noise"," the masked man replied, as he watched the cannon attached to the mecha's tail beginning to emit bolts of energy from around its chassis; as the metal being was revving it up. "What about yours, loser? What name will I be giving to the Junkyard guy, once I have him make a tombstone out of your corpse?"
"Ohhh, you've got spunk, don't you, human?! I like that; it's always entertaining to see bravado transform into cowardice whenever it dawns on your kind that you're about to die," the mecha mused with a sadistic tone in his voice, as he let out an evil cackle. "Metal Face… I am "Metal Face"... Remember that name, because it'll be the last name you'll ever think of," the metal monster said threateningly, as it began calculating the best moment to strike his opponents.
Appearing uninterested by the mecha's name, Noise turned Neco-Arc upside down to begin leaning his elbow on her upright shoes, pretending to pick his nails, while letting out a bored yawn. "Metal Face, huh? Is that really what you want to be remembered as…? Alright, that's fine with- WOAG!" Noise shouted in a battle cry, as he threw Neco-Arc's body at Metal Face, just as the massive mecha leapt forward to bring its bladed claws down on him.
"NYAAAAAAAA?!" Neco-Arc yelped in pain, as she was smacked off course by Metal Face's clawed hand; the raging fire beneath her shoes thrusting her into an out of control spiral, that caused her to crash into the side of a nearby skyscraper.
Irritated by how easily Noise had been able to predict its surprise-attack, Metal Face let out a thunderous grunt as it leaned forward to take aim with its massive tail-cannon. "You got lucky, you little creep! Now… LET'S SEE YOU DODGE THIS!" Metal Face roared out furiously, before beginning to cackle madly as a continuous beam of lightning-infused energy shot out of the tip of his cannon— its plasmic heat melting the asphalt into molten lava, as he quickly tracked it to where Noise had evaded it.
Smiling in the face of danger, Noise was flipping Metal Face off during the entire time he began rummaging through his own pocket, skillfully dodging the beam of energy, as he pulled out his trusty rocket-propelled scooter. "Feast your eyes on this, ya friggin' scrap-heap! I'll show ya what TRUE power looks like!" Noise shouted triumphantly, before using the red button attached to the end of his scooter's handlebar to ignite its thrusters; allowing him to instantly move at mach three speeds.
Caring not for the mayhem and destruction that his beam of plasmic energy was causing, Metal Face was seething with rage as he tried to keep up with Noise, who was taunting it while riding along the sides of the skyscrapers surrounding them. "I-Impossible…! No human can move THAT fast!" Metal Face growled out in anger, while getting mooned by the costumed man himself. "... Enough of these games! Just DIE!" Metal Face screeched out, before surprising Noise by suddenly transforming into an advanced version of a fighter jet; its massive golden-metal wings expanding outward, while its tail-like cannon was positioned forward to act like a cockpit.
"Holy crap! It's a freakin' Transformer!" Noise shouted out loud with a stressed look on his face, as he suddenly found himself unable to keep up the silly-malicious act, as he watched Metal Face flying directly toward him at mach three speed. Silently cursing Neco-Arc for having destroyed his jetpack, Noise was forced to abandon his rocket-propelled scooter as he hoped sideways and over Metal Face's chassis, just as its massive metal body crashed straight through the side of the skyscraper that the costumed man had been riding on.
Cackling with anticipation, Metal Face made a U-turn around the crumbling skyscraper that it had just compromised; its cannon ready to fire, as it flew around the falling structure to where it last saw its opponent. "If you have any final words, now's the time to say them!" Metal Face taunted, as he fired his electrical-beam of volatile energy at Noise; creating a blinding light that illuminated the area in a cyan glow.
"WOAG!" Noise shouted back with a wide smile across his face, as he struck a pose powerful enough to redirect the blast away from him; sending the lightning blast out into the starless sky above.
"WHAT?! IMPOSSIBLE!" Metal Face roared out in protest, as it sped up toward where Noise was descending down into the streets below. "Whatever you're doing, it ends NOW!" Metal Face roared out in its thunderous voice, as it used the tip of its burning cannon to ram directly into Noise's small body; preventing the costumed man from using the yellow bombs that he had been trying to ignite during his fall.
Trying to grab a hold of Metal Face's cannon, Noise was caught off guard by his attacker suddenly transforming back into his bipedal form while still flying forward in midair. Getting grabbed before he could escape, Noise's eyes widened as he watched the mecha raise its clawed hand back. "I'll slice you into PIECES!" Metal Face roared out in a battle cry, before letting go of Noise's body, just seconds before his metal claws slashed against his small body.
"NAAAAOAIYAO!" Noise wailed out in agony, as he and his cut-up costume were sent flying downward into the streets. Upon impacting the road below, chunks of rebar and asphalt were sent flying upwards into the sky. Before he could be further damaged by the falling debris, or the beam of energy that was being fired down upon him by the mecha that was descending down upon him, Noise quickly leapt out of the center of the crater; narrowly avoiding being killed, as he somersaulted on the road upon landing.
Rolling up to his feet, Noise quickly whipped out his minigun from his spacious pocket; loading it with a fresh sausage, before beginning to fire it up at Metal Face. Cursing to himself as he watched Metal Face transform back into its jet-form, the costumed man began sprinting behind the flying mecha while trying to land a shot on its chassis with his minigun. Tracking his flying opponent, it didn't take long for Noise to realize what Metal Face was doing as he watched the mecha do another U-turn above him.
"Ugh! I never wanted to fight this jerk in the first place…!" Noise muttered to himself with his heart racing inside of his small chest, as he managed to perform a baseball slide just in time to avoid being crushed when Metal Face crash landed on the road; creating another dent in the asphalt, as the rebar beneath his armored feet broke while in the ground.
"Aw, did that hurt? I bet it did; it hurt because you're nothing but a puny little human pretending to be more than they are," Metal Face once again taunted sadistically, as it flexed its metal claws in preparation. "But enough with the talking; let's just get to the part where you DIE!" Metal Face shouted, as he began slashing his claws relentlessly down at Noise, who in turn was holding his own by parrying each attack with well-timed taunts.
After parrying one last time, Noise quickly ducked down to avoid getting his head ripped clean off while pulling out his trusty pogo-stick from his pocket. "BACK UP, JACK!" Noise shouted with a murderous look in his red eyes, as he used his powerful sports equipment to bounce Metal Face backwards; creating himself some breathing room that he used to switch his loadout in mid-battle. Pulling out his trusty kitchen knife and skateboard, Noise kicked his foot back as he launched himself toward his massive opponent at mach four speed; creating a trail of afterimages behind him, as he did a sick kickflip before leaping forward at Metal Face.
Having underestimated his opponent, instead of burying the blade of his kitchen knife into the white-armored cranium of the mecha, Noise's attack was parried by Metal Face's razor-sharp claws. Hoping to deliver a killing blow to the masked man, Metal Face used its other hand to slash upwards beneath Noise's feet; hoping to catch the short knife-wielding man, while he was falling back down to the ground.
Letting out a powerful "woag", Noise did the unexpected by pulling out a second knife from his pocket before using it to parry Metal Face's other clawed hand. Having learned better than to try propelling himself at the mecha, Noise quickly adapted to fighting Metal Face at an extremely close range, so as to not only prevent his opponent from using its cannon on him, but to take advantage of its long-lanky limbs.
Once it realized what Noise's plan was, Metal Face attempted to back up to create distance between him and the costumed gremlin by dashing backwards. "No! NO! NOT LIKE THIS!" Metal Face screamed in horror, as it trying its hardest to pull Noise away from its vulnerable torso, as the costumed man evade its claws once more while leaping forward with his knives raised up over his shoulders; a murderous smile appearing on his masked face, as he plunged both of his blades into the mecha's torso. "G-GET OFF ME!" Metal Face roared out in a panicked voice, as it tried transforming into a jet once more to shake the vicious gremlin off of its body.
Relentlessly, Noise stabbed Metal Face's body; cutting through the mecha's wiring, and causing it to leak coolant out of its wounds. "Gngh! Ugh…?! Nehehe…! Weehehehe!" Noise laughed mockingly, after feeling a sharp pain erupting in his abdomen, before going back to slashing and dicing the mecha with his surprisingly sturdy knives; severing the joints within Metal Face's shoulders, and causing for his massive arms to fall of while his thrashing movements began to slow down.
"Ngh… T-This is for my gal!" Noise shouted in an exhausted voice as he crossed his arms over his chest with his knife held tightly in his gloved hands, before swinging both bladed weapons down in a scissor-cut motion; decapitating the armless mecha whose body exploded into a cloud of light. Falling down from where he had latched himself onto the Metal Face's body, Noise let out a grunt the moment his body once again collided against the road; dropping his knives, as he laid face down against the asphalt.
Picking himself off of the floor, Noise was sitting up on one knee while clutching his abdomen as he stared back at the trophized version of the Metal Face laying sideways on top of the spot where he had dealt the killing blow. "Heh heh, ah… Good riddance, ya piece of junk, heh," Noise chuckled wearily at his defeated opponent, as he slowly pulled one hand away from his bloodied wound; inspecting the crimson stain on his white-glove, before letting out a cynical laugh. "Haha, ah! Guess I ain't as invincible as you thought I was, Hazel… Sorry about that," Noise apologized half-sarcastically out loud, as he reached down with his bloodied hand to pull out his lighter and pack of leftover cigarettes from his pocket.
Hearing the young woman's timid footsteps coming up from behind him, Noise made sure to finish lighting the tip of the cigarette that he had between his lips before painfully turning himself around to face toward the Japanese girl with the two red-clips in her bangs. "Y-You're still here…? W-Why…? Usually crybabies like yourself run for the hills at the first chance they get," Noise mused meanly, as he inhaled the nicotine smoke from his cigarette, before blowing a cloud of smoke toward the direction of the sweating woman standing before him.
"W-Well… I-I, uhhh… I-I don't know… I don't know, uhhh… I-I don't-"
"-"I don't know, I don't know, I don't know"! Ugh, Jesus kid, what DO you know…!?" Noise snapped with an annoyed look in his half-closed eyelids, as he took another draw from his cigarette.
Tapping her fingers together nervously, the frowning petite-woman remained silent for a bit as a guilty expression slowly found its way to her sweat-covered face. "... I know that you're dying, and that… That's it's… It's my fault that y-you're dying," the young woman stuttered out with her eyes beginning to become watery, as she lowered head in shame. "... I am s-s-so sorry… I didn't want any of this to happen, i-it just… It's just that my friend and I got dragged into some scuffle, and-"
"-Kid, with all due respect, w-what makes you think that I want your whiny-ass excuses to be the last thing I listen to…?" Nose interrupted rudely with a snarky smirk across his face, as he let out a throaty laugh before collapsing back onto his bottom.
"I… I-I don't know, uh… S-Sorry, sorry; I'll s-stop talking," the young woman muttered timidly, as she tightened her fingers into quivering fists beside her hips.
Taking another draw from his cigarette, Noise slowly blew out his last puff of smoke from his lungs before flicking the cancer-stick out into the street. "Good… G-Good, cause I got something for your whiny-ass to do, and I ain't got all night to tell ya it," Noise said with a sigh, as he momentarily glanced down to look at the amount of blood that was leaking out of his abdomen.
"... Oh wait, hold on. Wait… Wait, hold on," Noise muttered more so to himself than to the young woman who he had unintentionally saved. Bringing his stained glove back up to his face, Noise used his long nose to take a big whiff from the back of his hand; letting out a hollow gasp, as a look of true anguish appeared on his goofy face. "Oh God, NO! THE FREAKIN' GROCERIES!" Noise cried out in horror, as he stuck his hand back into his pocket to quickly fish out a dripping-wet plastic shopping bag; the same very bag that Metal Face's claws had slashed through, during Noise's scuffle with the mecha.
And as Noise fell down dramatically to his knees to begin trying to salvage what he could from his bag of ruined toppings, the petite young woman awkwardly stood there before suddenly tensing up the moment she saw Neco-Arc casually walking back with an ice cold frappe from Starbucks in her balled hand. Obnoxiously taking a slurp through her straw, Neco-Arc stood there until she was finished with her Java-Chip Mocha; completely oblivious to the fight that occurred in her absence. "Buranyuu~! Hey guys, what'd I miss?"
Standing up from the ground, Noise used his free hand to smack the empty cup of ice out of Neco-Arc's hand, before shoving the destroyed bag of goods into the cat-girl's derpy face. "Bad news, Cat! That big-gay-metal-brute— the one who I tried throwing you at— tore our toppings apart with its claws!" Noise announced with a sad look in his eyes, as if though what he was describing was nothing short of a tragedy. "A-And instead having the pizza points to buy more ingredients, your FATASS used them to buy an overpriced milkshake insteaaaaddd-WAAAAHH!" Noise cried out, before beginning to comedically sob, as he pulled the ripped shopping bag away from Neco-Arc's sauce-covered face.
Instead of taking offense to being insulted, Neco-Arc's usual derpy smile disappeared, and instead was replaced by a dramatically heartbroken expression. "M-My God… W-What have I done…?!" Neco-Arc gasped out, before falling backwards in slow motion, as a stagelight from nowhere manifested itself to shine down on her. 'Could I have avoided this tragic path of sot, that's led me to my present infirmities and spiritual woes? Or is destitution the byproduct of this capitalistic nightmare we call "freedom"? Am I a true victim, or just another cog in the machine?'
Being a witness to how overdramatic both Noise and Neco-Arc were being over their mismanagement of money, the young Japanese woman stood there in awkward silence, trying to build up the nerve to speak, before finally getting their attention by clearing her throat. "Ah! Uh, ummm…! I-I know where you can get s-some p-p-pizza points!" The young woman piped up in a high-pitched voice, before letting out a nervous squeak the moment both Noise and Neco-Arc turned their heads toward her; both gremlins having a dead-serious expression on their faces, while having stopped crying completely.
"... Go on… SPEAK," Noise said in a deep, cold voice; sending a chill down the nervous woman's spine, as she felt immediately pressured by the menacing look the two of them were beginning to give her.
"Ahhhh?! W-Well, uh?! Y-You know how that robot-guy wanted to sell Denji? W-Wait… Oh shit…! D-Denji?! D-DENJI!" The young woman cried out, as the reality of what happened prior to Noise's intervention came crashing down on her; breaking her free from her moment of awkward submission, as she turned heel to begin sprinting back toward the trophized chainsaw-headed man, who had been placed down far away from the destructive aftermath of Noise's battle with Metal Face.
Leaving the young woman mourn over the death of her pseudo-sibling, Noise and Neco-Arc were left to exchange goofy expressions with one another in silence; neither of them aware of the short, white-skinned puppet that was slowly creeping up behind them. Staring at his new customers through his yellow and pink glasses, the slick black-haired puppet with a long-pointy nose and a giant-toothy grin fixed the collar of his black blazer, the white puppet drew closer-and-closer, until surprising the two gremlins by reaching up from behind to grab them by the shoulders.
"[HEY EVERYONE], [FRIEND REQUEST ACCEPTED]! [SPAMTON G. SPAMTON] Couldn't [F1] But To Notice [BUY MY ANIME MERCH] That [BIG] Trophy [WINNER, WINNER, WINNER!] You've Got Over [LIMITED TIME SALE] There [CLICK THE LINK BELOW TO CLAIM YOUR FREE PRIZE]... Maybe You [VALUED CUSTOMER] Would Be Interested [CALL NOW] In [SELL]ing Me, [NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN1997] That Fine [GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY][ITEM]? [END-USER LICENSE AGREEMENT]?"
