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Chapter three

Past

Vinnie stretched his sore muscles. He sighed and stared at the ceiling. Schoolday. He hardly could walk after what his mom did to him last night. How long was he gonna take this? This was going on for years now. Why didn't he have the balls to stand up against her? Ugh. He was asking himself this question for years now. He was weak. Just like his mom told him. He was nothing.
With one more sigh, he slid out of bed. He quickly got dressed and looked in the mirror. His face wasn't that swollen. But a big bruise was visible under his white fur, right under his left eye. What excuse would he use now? Ball game with his dad. Yeah. Things got kinda rough and his father accidently threw the ball right in his face. He stared at the bruise, then to the rest of his body. He was fifteen now and his body became more… manly. More muscular. He had noticed girls stopped with what they were doing when he walked by. He heard them whispering how handsome he was. He sighed. Handsome or not, still weak.

When he walked into the school, the bell rang. He was just in time. He made sure to keep his head down, eyes focussed on the floor. Hopefully nobody was gonna notice him. But of course, Throttle did.
"Hey Vin!"
Vinnie quickly waved at him without looking and walked further. But Throttle caught up with him. Vinnie still stared at the floor. Throttle grabbed his arm and forced him to stop. He dragged the white furred mouse with him to a quiet place and pushed him against the wall. Vinnie let it all happen, his eyes still down.
"Look at me, little bro."
Vinnie slowly lifted his head. Throttle stared at the bruise.
"What happened this time?"
"Eh… rough ball game with my dad…", Vinnie said softly, lowering his eyes. His breathing became heavier, his heart was pounding in his chest.
Throttle sighed and crossed his arms before his chest.
"Listen, Vin. I know people can be clumsy. But nobody can be THAT clumsy... You sure there isn't something you want to tell me? You do know we are on the same side."
Vinnie let the words dawn on him. He suddenly felt all his misery, all his pain come up. His eyes filled with tears. He roughly wiped them away. He didn't want to cry. Crying was for the weak. But he was weak. No. No crying. But he just couldn't stop the tears. He turned his head away from Throttle, who was waiting patiently with a worried look on his face.
Vinnie made a decision. His mom said she was gonna kill him if he ever would tell anyone. Good. Death sounded way better than living like this. Living in hate. Living in fear. He took a deep breath.
"I eh… It's my mom, Throttle… She… Gosh, she said she will kill me if I was gonna tell someone… She…", Vinnie stuttered. He closed his mouth. How in the world was he gonna tell this?
"What is it with your mom, Vincent? Is she the one who is doing this to you?", Throttle asked urgently. Vinnie slowly nodded.
"She.. she is not feeling well. She is drunk everyday. And I… I always make her mad somehow. I…"
"She is hitting you?"
Again, Vinnie slowly nodded, but immediately felt regret. Regret that he was telling this. It wasn't his mom fault. It was his fault. His existence. He was weak. He was nothing. Because of him, his mom was like this.
"Please, Throttle, don't tell anyone. It isn't her fault… It's my fault… I'm weak…", Vinnie whispered and grabbed Throttle by the shoulders. Throttle stared at him, disbelief in his brown eyes.
"Your fault? Vinnie, what are you talking about? Look what she is doing to you. It is wrong. No way that's your fault!"
Vinnie took a deep breath and looked at Throttle with wide eyes. He was breathing heavily, his hands were shaking.
"Please Throttle. I'm begging you. Don't tell anyone. You have to promise me you won't tell!", he said, feeling panic. Throttle raised his hands.
"Easy, Vin. Okay. I promise I won't tell. Your secret is safe with me."
Vinnie relaxed a little.
"Thanks. Forget about this. It was wrong to tell you. I'm sorry… I…", he suddenly didn't knew what to say anymore.
He grabbed his bag and quickly walked to his class. Throttle stayed speechless behind, a frown on his face.

When Vinnie came home from school, he immediately ran to his room and closed the door. His father was at work, so he just hoped his mom had a good day today and would leave him alone. He snorted. Right. Who was he kidding? When he threw his bag in the corner, he suddenly heard the doorbell. He froze and perked his ears. He heard his mom cursing and waddle to the door. He quickly opened the door from his room and sneaked to the stairs. He slowly sat down on top of the stairs, just when his mom opened the door.
"Tread! What a surprise!", she cheered. Vinnie rolled his eyes. When she was with friends or other family, she always played the happy, loving housewife. It was behind closed doors, the real Silver showed herself.
"Silver! How are you?", Tread asked with his calm husky voice. Throttle was a younger version of Tread. He had the same brown fur, the same voice and the same personality. But Throttle had the eyes of his mom, Star. The same dark brown colour.
"I'm fine, I'm fine! What do I owe this pleasure to? Finn is at work, I can't remember we had something planned?", Silver purred.
"Well… Can I come in? I need to talk to you. Something very disturbing came to my ears today…", Tread said, still calm. Vinnie had never seen Tread upset or angry. He was always calm. He could be very clear when the boys had done something that was not okay, but he never yelled. Vinnie was crazy about him. He was his second father, actually. He sometimes wished he was born in the Stormborn family. But he always felt guilty after thinking that.
"Sure, sure. Come in! Want something to drink?", his mom babbled. Vinnie could hear she was already drunk again. Tread would notice, right?
"No, thank you. Sit down, Silver. Let's talk. Throttle came to me with a story that really concerns me. He told me you are having problems. Problems with alcohol?" There was no judgement, no anger in his voice.
There was a long silence. Vinnie almost didn't dare to move, scared he would miss something. Shit. Throttle had told his father, even though he had promised not to tell... Shit, shit, shit. What was his mom going to do?
"I eh… Yeah… He is right. I do have some troubles lately…", Silver said softly.
"We are friends, Silver. You know you can talk to us? We want to help you. Is there something we can do?"
"No… It's nothing major, really. Vinnie told Throttle, I suppose?"
"Yeah he did. He is worried about you. He wants to help you."
"I… I just feel so lonely. Finn is ignoring me, he leaves me at home all the time, to take care of Vinnie… It's hard sometimes…"
Vinnie perked his ears. Was she really crying? His heart made a jump in his chest. Maybe Tread could help her. Maybe things were finally going to chance…
"Listen. Why don't you all come over this weekend? We can have a bbq in the yard, talk with each other… Maybe we can help… Because it's not fair to take out your frustration on Vinnie..."
"He told you that? That's… Okay. We will be there this weekend. Thank you. Thank you for not judging me."
"I see you saturday, okay?", Tread asked when they were standing at the front door. Silver nodded and gave him a hug.
"Yes. Thank you…" and she closed the door behind him. Vinnie didn't move.
"Mom..?", he asked hesitantly. Silver slowly turned around. Vinnie froze when he saw the ice cold look in her eyes. He felt confused. He really had thought she wanted help. That things were finally going to chance. But now…
He jumped at his feet and ran into his room. He shut the door with a loud bang. He heard his mom's footsteps on the stairs. Panic took over. He crawled under his blanket. For a moment, he only heard his own rapid breathing...
But then, his door flew open. The blanket got yanked away and Vinnie didn't move, waiting for the first clap. But it didn't came. He slowly opened his eyes and looked up at his mom. She was standing at his bed and where she normally was shaking in anger, she now stood perfectly still. Vinnie blinked a few times and looked into her eyes. His heart stopped. He never had seen her look at him like this. This was no anger. No, this was pure hatred.
"You are not my son anymore. From now on, you are dead to me", she said with a ice cold voice. She turned around and walked out of his room.
Vinnie just lay there, feeling numb while the tears streamed over his face.

Present

"Our baby is doing great, cutie. Swee did a check today and our little sprout is growing good. Two months to go and then… I just wish you wake up… I miss you…"
Violet was sitting at Vinnie's bed, his hand in her hands. His accident was now four weeks ago, and he still hadn't woke up. Swee had told her he was recovering, but he needed time. He had good hope everything was going to be okay. Violet sighed. She forced herself to stay positive, but it was hard. She was so scared he wasn't going to be there when their baby was gonna be born. His wounds were all healed, his broken arm too. Throttle and Modo had worked overtime to get his bike back into shape. So he didn't have to see his bike so heavily damaged. Even his helmet was as good as new. The only thing they needed now, was a awake Vinnie. But minutes became hours, hours became days, days became weeks...
Vinnie's eyes were flying in every direction under his closed eyelids. Swee had told her he was dreaming. That was a good thing. She could only hope he was dreaming about nice stuff… But today was different. Tears were streaming over his face. Violet wiped them away, feeling very worried. God, what if she was gonna lose him? Tears filled her eyes. She couldn't lose him, right? She couldn't even imagine how that would feel. She was nothing without him. And their baby… Their baby needed a father. But she knew Vinnie was a fighter. So, she clung to that thought. He was a fighter. He was gonna wake up. Soon.

Past

Weeks had passed since Tread had talked to Silver. They never went to Tread's house that weekend. No. Silver had broke all the bonds with the Stormborn family.
But she did kept her word to Vinnie. She didn't look at him, she didn't talk to him… She acted like he wasn't there. Vinnie was, at the beginning, kinda glad she didn't hit him anymore. But slowly, he just wished she did. He wanted her attention. Even if it was negative attention. Because this was actually worse.
Vinnie's dad was still trying to make his son happy. They never spoke about Silver. They never spoke about all the shit his mom had done to him. Vinnie stopped trying to talk about it. His dad never listened. He always changed the subject when he tried to talk about it. So, Vinnie gave up. And he felt something chance inside of him. Instead of fear, there slowly grew anger. Frustration. Why wasn't his mom talking to him? Why wasn't she even looking at him? He was her son, for fuck sake. He tried everything to get her attention, but she didn't gave in. He had never, ever felt so lonely. And it made him even more angry. What did he have to do to get her attention?
He just had turned sixteen, when the troubles began. The anger and frustration had simmered for a while. They grew bigger and bigger and nobody told him what to do with it. He was alone and helpless, drowning in his own emotions.

Vinnie walked into school, feeling very cranky. What was he doing here anyway? He walked to his locker and slammed it open.
"If it isn't our clumsy nerd. Having a bad day?"
Neal's voice. Vinnie clenched his jaws and grabbed his books. He closed the locker with so much force, it almost broke. Since he started training his body, he became a lot stronger. And sometimes he was surprised by how strong.
"Leave me alone", he growled at Neal, trying to walk past the bully. But Neal had other plans.
"Wow wow, I asked you a question. It's polite to answer it, you know..", the mean mouse smiled, grabbing Vinnie's arm.
Vinnie froze. He suddenly felt his blood boiling. Why was this piece of shit so mean to him anyway? Why couldn't he just leave him alone? The nerve of that guy. What had he done to deserve this? Vinnie slowly turned around and looked at Neal.
"I said; leave me alone…", he said, his voice dangerously low. He saw Neal flinch, but recover quickly. Vinnie yanked himself free and wanted to walk away, when again, Neal grabbed him. And that was enough to make him explode. He whirled around and punched Neal right in the face. Hard.
Neal flew against the lockers with a bang, his nose bleeding. He jumped at his feet and attacked Vinnie. He jumped on the white furred mouse, causing him to fall on the ground. They rolled over the floor, punching each other.
"HEY! KNOCK IT OUT, NOW!" and the headmaster grabbed Neal and dragged him off Vinnie.
Vinnie was lying on the ground, breathing heavily. His nose was bleeding too, but he didn't care.
"Both of you, my office. NOW!"
Vinnie slowly stood up and followed the headmaster and Neal. When they all sat down, the headmaster shook his head.
"Neal, I'm not surprised to see you here, but Vincent… I had expected better from you…"
Vinnie said nothing, staring at his feet.
"He started this, sir. I…", Neal started but the headmaster shut him up.
"Stop it. I don't want to hear any excuses. You both have detention this whole week and I will call your parents to inform them."
That took Vinnie's attention. Maybe his mom would be mad at him again. Maybe she would talk to him again.
"Now, get out of my face, both of you. And don't even think about fighting again."
Vinnie jumped at his feet and quickly left the office. He walked back to the lockers to grab his bag, but it wasn't where he left it.
"Looking for this?"
Vinnie looked up and saw Throttle. With his bag. He walked over to the tan furred mouse and tried to grab it, but Throttle stopped him.
"I heard you got into a fight. I never had thought I would hear your name and the word fight in one sentence. You okay?"
Vinnie nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. He got what he deserved."
Throttle studied his face. "Violence isn't gonna solve anything, you know that right?"
Vinnie shrugged. "The guy is making my life miserable since day one. He deserved this."
"Maybe you're right." Throttle gave him his bag. Vinnie grabbed it and turned around.
"Vinnie? You know you can talk to me, right?"
Vinnie whirled around and snorted.
"Yeah, I know. But since you aren't that good in keeping secrets, I think I'll pass", he snarled.
Throttle stared at him. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I did it to protect you. To help you…"
"I don't need your protection or your help anymore. Since the last time you 'helped', things are fucked up. So, just leave me alone, okay?"
Vinnie turned around and marched to his class. The nerve of that guy. Helping him. Right. He only had made things worse. He had promised to keep it a secret and he broke that promise. Vinnie lashed his tail through the air. He didn't need anyone. From now on, he was on his own. Less disappointments. Less pain. And he was gonna fight. He was done with the fear. No... no more fear. No more crying. No more weakness. He was gonna show his mother, his father, the whole world that he was everything... but weak.

When he came home, only his mom was there. His father was at work. Vinnie hoped she was gonna say something about the fight, but she didn't. He slowly sat down at the table and looked at her.
"I got into a fight today. Did the school call you?", he asked.
His mom didn't respond. She just continued reading in her magazine, drinking Martian Liquor. Evil potion. Vinnie snorted. He had been so naive. But then again, who could blame him? He was ten years old back then, for fuck sake.
"Mom… Do you hear me? I got into a fight today. Now it's your job to be mad about it, screaming at me that violence isn't gonna solve anything… You know, be a mom…"
Silver lifted up her hand and Vinnie's heart made a jump. But she only turned a page. Vinnie just sat there, staring at her. And he suddenly couldn't take it anymore. He jumped at his feet, grabbed the bottle and smashed it against the wall. It exploded into a thousand pieces, the strong scent of alcohol filled the air. That took her attention. She also jumped at her feet, her eyes fuming. Vinnie thought she was finally gonna say something, but she just turned around and left the house. He heard her bike leaving. Vinnie just stood there, staring at the mess.
He felt his anger, his frustration swirl inside of him. He didn't know how long he was gonna take this. How long he was gonna be able to control this darkness that was growing inside of him. That was consuming him. That was slowly turning him into another person.


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