A/N Another upload... YAY! I'm still not really sure where this is going, so if you have any ideas, I am all ears... or eyes... I will be reading it, after all. I'm not really sure just how I'm going to fit the fluff into this, but I'll finagle a way, I love fluff almost as much as I love angst... which you should be able to tell -after only two chapters- is quite a bit. And, I have decided that I WILL BE INCREASING THE RATING TO 'M' NEXT CHAPTER. So keep your eyes peeled for that. All in all, I hope you enjoy this chapter and Review/critique/favorite/follow/Etc. :)
"Oof," Well, Kurt thought, that hurt. It seemed that high school was never going to give him a legitimate day off.
High School: 988 Kurt Hummel: 000
He hated that his tally was so depressingly nonexistent when life was beating up on him so badly. Kurt gently slid himself out of the dumpster and grabbed his bag off the ground. He was glad that Finn had at least come through for him by saving his accessory. Goodness knows he could have thrown it in with him. Well, he thought, time to try braving the storm. Kurt always tried to remember something his mom told him with frequency: There can be no rainbow without the rain. He hoped that meant that he would only have to endure this for so long, but here he was, a sophomore, and he still had days becoming worse and worse. Like being slapped by a blizzard. Slushie facials really hurt his day.
High School: 989 Kurt Hummel: 000
"Oh my gosh, Kurt, they got you, too," Mercedes walked up to him and grabbed him by the arm. He hissed at the pressure on his scrape, but she didn't notice. "Come on, white-boy, you're coming with me." Suddenly he was being dragged into the girls' bathroom where he saw Rachel and Tina wiping colorful slushies off their faces.
"Well, ladies, it's not my first choice of color, but it's not as bad as blue-raspberry," Kurt snarked bitterly as he wiped the green slushie out of his hair. He grabbed a moist towellete packet that he'd secretly bought from a corner shoppette and stowed in his bag out of a pocket. He peeled one out for each Rachel, Tina, and himself as Mercedes kneeled while starting to 'Tide-to-go" the spots on his bright blue pants. Kurt looked on forlornly as they each slowly de-slushed themselves.
Well, it was the start of another day at McKinley High School, what did I expect?
Kurt grabbed his bright pink belt and carefully wiped off the green residue. He slid it back through his belt loops carefully, his mind on the pink sunglasses he'd seen the day before that inspired the ostentatious decision.
"I so don't want to go to football practice with those jerks. They are not worth the time spent on drilling them, they will not score a single goal, and they do not think that their atrocious acts will catch up to them!" Kurt huffed, working himself out of his little moment of happiness from thinking about that beautiful hazel-eyed boy.
"Kurt, I don't mean to sound ignorant-" Rachel started.
"Trust me, you will sound ignorant." Kurt cut off.
"But, as I was saying, why do you even play football when all you're going to get is intolerance and detriment to your well-being?"
Kurt sighed, having not expected any of this to happen this morning, he was woefully unprepared to go into the whole "my dad doesn't like gays, which I'm totally not, and loves football and it's the only way I that I am ever going to make him proud" speech. He instead answered with a simple, "It is none of your business Rachel. Come on, girls, we have class to get to." He helped Mercedes off the floor, thanked her for her help, did one more once over of his clothes, and left the girls bathroom, carefully looking left and right as he went.
Classes passed slowly, Kurt looked over his shoulders during every change and was majorly paranoid the entire time. He couldn't wait for the day to just end. Five minutes until school let out, Kurt received a little scribbled note; more like it was thrown at him and aimed for his face. Good thing that whoever wrote it had awful aim. That alone told him that the perpetrator was one of the football players, they always tried -and miserably failed- to put a spin on their projectiles.
Stay away frum R locerroom Fary.
Beware of R reveng.
Kurt could easily piece together that it was a football player from the atrocious spelling and Karofsky's smirk told him more than he wanted to know.
He really ought to watch out for the football players, but there was nowhere else for Kurt to go except into the locker room. He had to change for practice and being late was not an option. He was already on Coach Tanaka's shit list; Kurt didn't need to make things worse for himself. So, ten minutes before practice was due to start, Kurt trailed several feet behind the other players to the locker room, his extra clothes in tow.
"Fairy, I thought I told you to not come in here. What kind of stupid are you?" Kurt flinched at the voice in his ear. He was facing the wall of lockers and pulling off his over-shirt. Karofsky was towering over him and snarling his words. "Hey boys, I think it's time we taught the prancing little queer a lesson." Surrounded by Azimio, Karofsky, and two other, reluctant, boys, Kurt knew he was in for a thrashing. The first punch was a surprise, banging his head into his open locker, and the holding of his head in said locker was unexpected too. Then the more familiar territory of kicks and punches started.
"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!" The barrage against Kurt's body stopped and he slunk down to the floor, wincing at all the scrapes layering his body. Coach Tanaka looked pissed to see his footballers hurting one of their team-mates. He thought of Kurt as more of one of the glee-kids, but he couldn't let the football players off of it when two of the guys were obviously on this kid's side. The kids, Matt and Mike, were pulling Karofsky off of Kurt, showing that they would tattle if he didn't deal with his players. "I'M WAITING!" he roared, trying to get something that would let him be able to get his players off without any trouble.
Kurt made a little whimper on the floor, the loud noises the coach made were reverberating in his head and he couldn't stop himself. The coach looked at him with thinly veiled disgust; he grabbed Kurt by the arm and pulled him up on his feet. Kurt wasn't able to stop the scream escaping him from the pain radiating from his wrenched arm. There was a quiet opening and closing of a door while all of the players looked at each other uneasily.
"Porcelain, what the devil's flying monkeys has happened to you!" Sue Sylvester had arrived with Quinn Fabray and Santana Lopez flanking her and her bullhorn in tow. Kurt winced again, all of the sudden noises disorienting his head and making his knees shake as they feebly held him up. Sue barked through the bullhorn again, "Tanaka, I want every B.O. infected, hormone run, awful excuse for progeny of an entire generation out of this room in fifteen seconds!" Everyone looked at her oddly until she started counting down, then they scrambled out, despite their states of undress. "Except you; I want the Asian and the one next to the Asian to stay, got it?" Mike and Matt did double takes then nervously went to help support Kurt up.
"I want explanations and I want them now. Somebody better explain to me why we have an injured, high-pitched, wheezy, flop-haired, singing masquerade having trouble standing up." There was nothing quite like the insults of Sue Sylvester, even if they are in your defense. Kurt could not concentrate enough to pay attention, though. His breathing was unsteady and he really just wanted the pain to stop.
Coach Tanaka had a nervous look about him, he was not quite sure how to deal with the backlash of what he let happen. Matt looked to Mike, who looked right back at him. Kurt actually was wheezing a little from his ordeal. Matt spoke up, "Well, Coach Sylvester, some of the guys said something about Hummel not being allowed in the locker room and him being too stupid not to listen and then someone banged his head into his locker. Then they started hitting him and he fell to the floor. Mike and I were trying to pick them off of him when you came in." Sue looked at him silently, her lips pursed in a grimace as her glare intensified. She glared at Coach Tanaka.
"Tanaka, you useless excuse for a piece of staff that pines away for a doe-eyed ginger, why didn't you stop them from ganging up on fancy pants?" Coach Tanaka was taken aback by Sue's little quips and didn't know how to respond to her question. He muttered something along the lines of football, coaching, boys, and the next game of the season. "Well, Tanaka, I hope you realize that every chance of winning the next game was punched out at the same time Porcelain was, he will not be playing for you for at least three weeks; I can guarantee you that, you lard-filled, before picture of a weight-loss commercial."
Sue Sylvester was not happy as she barged out of the locker room, Santana and Quinn gently grabbing Kurt from Matt and Mike as they all followed her to her office. "Boys, I want a full escort on Porcelain after school and during practices. If that means you have to join painting or twirling or whatever Lady-face does in his spare time, I don't care. Between the times he's in class, at home, or with me, you will be around him. Is that clear." Sue's last sentence should have been a question, but the menacing glare she gave to Mike and Matt booked no arguments. "Now scram, I need to talk to Princess here alone," she said to the boys before turning to Santana and Quinn, "You too, I want you to take up positions outside the door." Kurt looked nervous as they all exited the office space, leaving him alone, seated in front of the intimidating Coach Sylvester. "Alright Lady-face, I bet you're wondering why I saved your little butt from the rampaging footballers," Kurt managed a little nod. "Well, Princess, I dislike Will Schuester, your shellacked little Glee club patron, and I wish to take him down. This will be easily accomplished by winning over his people and placing my own in his little pet project. You will have my protection if you become my spy, Santana and Quinn will be joining the club as well as your two little football buddies. You will all lobby for me whenever I bid. It will be easy enough and all of the Cheerios will back you in the hallways and whenever they see you in trouble. How does immunity sound to you?" Kurt was floundering; Sue's sharp deliverance of her proposal had caught him unawares.
Kurt started to nod, he could see all of the advantages for himself, but then he stopped himself before he could agree. "What else do you want?" He was able to quietly say without distressing his stomach. He knew there had to be more in it for her. If she was already placing Santana and Quinn in Glee Club, why did she need him?
"You're quick, fancy, I'll give you that. I need some new performances to blow the top off at the next Cheerio competition. I think you could train Santana, Quinn, and the other girls to do a spunky musical number with you on lead. It could be the next big step in your career." Sue had laid out the perfect trap. Kurt could see it, and he wanted it so desperately. But, he could not forget his dad. He loved his dad and couldn't increase how much of a disappointment he was to him. Kurt knew that glee club already stretched the limits, that plus his future inaction in games due to how badly Karofsky had roughed him up would push his dad over the edge. He wouldn't be able to walk around his house without the shame that his father's eyes would layer upon him.
"I'm sorry, Coach. I can't do it." Kurt was quiet and respectful as he gently picked himself out of the chair in front of her desk and shuffled out into the hallway. There were few times Sue Sylvester was surprised by someone's actions, but she could truthfully saw that she was dumbfounded.
Kurt went to his locker and grabbed his bag, vowing to grab his extra clothes from the locker room later in the week. He limped off of school grounds and approached a convenience store. He took a fortifying breath, straightened his gait, and walked in. Kurt meandered towards the toiletry aisle, trying to avoid suspicion. He looked around and grabbed a few packets and a canister; he then paid and left the store. Kurt tucked them into his bag and went back to the school to wait for his mom to come pick him up.
Later that night he pulled out his bag and that day's purchases; he looked at them and staring right back at him were three packages of replacement razors. Kurt threw the canister of shaving cream he bought to be less suspicious in the trash can in his bathroom and hid two of the packages, one in his closet and one under his bathroom sink. The third package he slowly opened, as if afraid it might bite. But that was silly, wasn't it? Biting was exactly what he wanted them to do. Five razor blades fell into his hand, four were placed in his bedside drawer, and one was laid against his hip, slicing once, twice, three times before he went and rinsed it off. He watched the blood slowly making its way down his side. He had pulled his pants lower so they wouldn't encumber the blood's trail, but it didn't matter since it sluggishly tapered off. Kurt slowly disrobed and walked to his shower, hoping the sting would make the dizziness even stronger. He loved that little rush of adrenaline in the back of his mind; he never knew that something like a little bit of bloodletting would make him feel so much better. His emotional pain was slowly replaced with physical pain and he felt like he was on cloud nine; Kurt would be okay, he could deal with physical pain.
A/N I wanted to say that I'm really sorry about the sporadic updates so far, I know that this is no excuse, but I've been sick and had a major amount of make-up work to get back to. Let's just say that there is no set schedule but I'll try to keep you from waiting for longer than three weeks per post. I'll try, no promises. I hope you all enjoy this and let me know if you have any ideas :)
