Hayuka: Maru kaite chikyuu! Maru kaite chikyuu! Maru kaite chikyuu boku HETALIA!

Miko: No! Not that again!

Mikasa: DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! DOITSU! PASTA!

Miko: I'm surrounded by insane people.

Hayuka: I am not insane enough to fawn over a guy that already likes his master.

Natsuka: Ne ne papa wain choudai! Ne ne mama! Ne ne mama!

Miko: Can you guys just STOP?

Natsuka, Hayuka & Mikasa: NO!

Miko: ... I hate you guys...

Hayuka: By the way, since the openings have been written, it goes like this:

Natsuka wrote Monochrome Factor and Ao no Exorcist, K project & Nurarihyon no Mago, Hetalia & Black Cat, Dantalian no Shoka

I wrote Naruto, Inazuma Eleven & Card Captor Sakura, Tsubasa Chronicles & Spirited away, Danball Senki

Mikasa wrote Fairytail and Accel World.

Miko typed, one chapter.

Miko: I really hate you guys now...

Natsuka: Also, we have a change of plans. We are going to update Ciel's audition first, followed by the rest of the main characters, then season 1 characters, finishing with season 2 chracters.

Mikasa; Please note that we will be updating very slowly.

Miko: Yeah, right. I am the only one studying, while you are all writing fanfictions.

Hayuka: (ignores Miko) Okay. First up to audition for Ciel Phantomhive, is Haruka from the Monochrome cast!"


"Next, we have Haruka from the Monochrome Factor cast!" Natsuka announced as she rummaged through slips of paper.

Haruka dressed in his Ciel cosplay costume, walked up the stage. He traded his earring for a pair of Ciel's blue earrings.

"Scene?" Hayuka asked.

"Episode 1," Haruka answered swiftly, taking out the Ciel coat and untied the ribbon.

"I have a good felling..." whispered Mikasa to Miko. Ciel was still sitten in his seat, although his eyebrows were raised, indicating that he was actually impressed by Haruka's calm and cool personality.

"Sebastian, Bard, Meu-Rin, Finny, take your place. Ready, 3...2...1... Snap!"

Natsuka clapped. Before Sebastian could say a word, Haruka already started singing.

"Wake up in the morning hear the words Young Master, it's Sebastian by the door, he says things are a disaster." Sebastian complied, knocking the 'door', serving tea and dressed Haruka.

Mey-Rins's breaking all the dished, Finny's burning the trees, and both Baldroy and Tanaka are already on their knees." The three servants and Tanaka complied.

"For mercy, Shinigami on my back, back. Butler wearing black, black. Some guys are stealing my crap, crap." At this lie, Grell gave a DEATH pose and Azzuro Vanel came on the stage as well.

"And now I'm going back into town," Sebastian draped a cloak on him. "Because of Finnian the clown. He broke my cane the third time this week, I mean honestly,"

"Ciel Phantomhive, pentacle on my eye, that's right, I'm not nice so you can kiss my feet and cry. I'm rich not a prick so don't make me throw a fit or I will kill you, I will kill you." He repeated it again and took out a gun, pointing it at the audience as he said "I will kill you, I will kill you."

"And let's look up Season 2 when there's this boy named Trancy. I mean seriously did they think I would not happen to get angry?" Alois and Claude a came on the stage.

"I mean the boy is just some blonde sue marice to me, and the butler can't even compare to my Sebby." At this line, Claude bowed down to Alois saying. "Yes, Your Highness." as Sebastian bowed to Haruka, saying "Yes, My Lord."

"I've still got a shinigami on my back, back. Butler still in black, black, some guys stealing my crap?well, he's dead now, HAHAHA!" Haruka pretended to raise his gun and shoot Azzuro. Azzuro fell on the floor in pretence.

"And let's talk about my Aunt Red. Who appears she's already dead. God, my life just gets suckier and suckier, doesn't it?"

"Kuroshitsuji, is a show about me, and my sucky life and all the people who had died. Some say its yaoi," Sebastian came over, nearing his lips to Haruka's before Haruka pushed him away and both of them started dancing to the music, "But I like to believe that, I must straight boy, I must straight boy."

"Kuroshitsuji is a show about me," Haruka took the Phantomhive ring out and threw it up before catching the ring again. "And my sucky life and all the people who had died. Some say it's yaoi," Haruka pulled Sebastians's tie and pulled him down, before making him carry him bridal style. "But I'll like to believe that, I'm a straight boy, I'm a straight boy." Sebastian was happy to comply as he enjoyed the angry face of his Young Master's.

"I can't believe, that's all I need, Yaoi fangirls can be with Sebby." Haruka pushed Sebastian away. "And when did I call my butler, the name the gay shinigami does? This song is lame. I want some cake. When will this damned thing be over with? You say its soon, but the climax is coming. Wait, this here is the climax. You're telling me to sing the chorus twice?I guess I have no complain then."

"Ciel Phantomhive, pentacle on my eye, that's right, I'm not nice so you can kiss my feet and cry. I'm rich not a prick so don't make me throw a fit or I will kill you, I will kill you." Haruka smiled evilly. "Kuroshitsuji, is a show about me, and my sucky life and all the people who had died. Some say its yaoi," Sebastian came over, nearing his lips to Haruka's before Haruka pushed him away and both of them started dancing to the music, "But I like to believe that, I must straight boy, I must straight boy." At the end of the song, Sebastian knelt down and did the 'Yes, my lord' again.

"I WILL NOT ACCEPT THE FACT THAT YOU JUST SEXUALLY HARASSED MY BUTLER!" Ciel screamed, unable to control himself.

"Young Masater, were you jealous?" Sebastian grinned.

"Haruka, you qualify for the second round!" Natsuka announced as she stamped 'Qualified' on Haruka's audition paper.

"WHAT?! NO WAY! NATSUKA, PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!" Ciel screamed at he CEO, hoping to make as change, but sadly, to no avail.


Natsuka: What do you think? How many points will you give him? I give 7.

Miko: Hm... I give 0, for mentioning of yaoi AND that is not my type of song.

Hayuka: Miko, yaoi is not a sin. By the way. I give 7.

Mikasa: Let me decide, 6.

Miko: Also, readers, please rate the participants for their auditioning. 1 to 10, your choice.

Natsuka: So that's it. Next up, Gouenji Shuuya from the Inazuma Eleven cast!


"I still don't understand why I must audition for Ciel Phantomhive," Gouenji grumbled.

"You will be perfect!" Endou crowed. "You are cold like Ciel...and clever too!"

"Next Gouenji Shuuya from the Inazuma Eleven Cast!" Hayuka announced.

"Gambateh, onii-san!" Yuuka cried as her brother went up onto the stage.

Gouenji really looked like Ciel, by the way Endou put makeup on him, and this surprised Ciel himself a lot. Sebastian, who stood on the stage smiled.

"This is going to be interesting..." he thought.

Gouenji had refused Endou's idea of him acting the time when Ciel dressed as a girl to investigate the Viscount. Instead, Gouenji decided to act badly enough so the judges can disqualify him. He had a great idea in mind, and he would make all the judges feel like vomitting.

"Recalling many Youtube videos we had watched," Gouenji cleared his throat and went, "Sebastian!"

Sebastian went up to Gouenji. "How may I serve you, Bocchan?"

Gouenji beckoned Sebastian to squat down, since Sebastian was much shorter than him. Sebastian did so, and Gouenji whispered

something into his ear. After a while, Sebastian's face turned a scarlet shade of pink.

"What did you just say?" Ciel rose up from the judges table and asked.

Gouenji just smiled.

"Sebastian, what did he tell you?" Ciel demanded again.

Sebastian was about to answer when Gouenji interrupted, "If you tell him, I'll ask Natsuka to remove all the catnip tequila. Oh, and kill your cat."

"What?!" Miko and Sebastian cried. Sweat was trickling down their foreheads.

"What have I got to do with this?" Natsuka yelped.

"You have nothing to do with this, "Gouenji said, "but I do know you really know how to blackmail Sebastian."

"How did you even know that?" Natsuka asked.

Gouenji shrugged. "Hayuka." He said simply.

Natsuka glared at Hayuka, who was busily writing something in her book. "Hayuka..." she growled.

Hayuka looked up. "What?" she asked innocently.

"Did you tell Gouenji I was blackmailing Sebastian?" Natsuka demanded.

"What? No, of course not!" Hayuka held up the paper she was writing. "Everything I write comes true!"

Amanda snatched the paper and read through it. "It's that fan fiction of hers." She muttered.

"What?!"

"You know, the fan fiction she is writing. "Audition for Kuroshitsuji III, the one we help her with." Amanda said.

"Oh..."

"If you are so concerned about Gouenji, just disqualify him." Hayuka said. "After all, that is what he wants, right?" Miko looks at Gouenji. "Disqualified," she sighed.

Hayuka turned back to her fan fiction. She wants to finish the part of the fan fiction where Gouenji auditions for Ciel.

Gouenji, on the other hand, went up behind Ciel as he whispered, "You said you want to talk with me in private?" in a seductive tone.

Ciel turned a brighter shade of pink.

Hayuka smiled, she just finished her fan fiction.


Hayuka: I rate 5!

Natsuka: 4, he makes me shrudder for some reason.

Mikasa: 4 too.

Miko: Again, I rate 0.

Hayuka: You are very mean, you know.

Miko: You know that you are annoying right?

Mikasa: Even this? DOITSU!

Miko: NO!

Hayuka: Okay, quit bickering. Next up, is Uzumaki Naruto a.k.a. Spiral Fishcakes from the Naruto cast!


"Anytime now... Then, it will be my turn..." Naruto muttered.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Why is he so anxious?

"Hahahahaha!" Laughter was heard, breaking Naruto's thoughts. He glared at the group behind him, which was Endou and his friends.

"What are you laughing at?" he demanded.

"You?!AsCielPhantomhive?!Hahahahaha!" Endou said between laughter.

"Huh?! So what?" Naruto scratched his head, confused.

"HahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Grrr... Shadow Clone Ninjutsu!"

Suddenly a stampede of Narutos appeared, charging for the Inazuma Eleven gang. What did they do? Well... Let's just say a soccer ball suddenly appeared and they performed Death Zone II on the Narutos. Naruto was shaking in anger as his duplicates were gone in poofs.

"Grr... Just you wait! I will get the role for Ciel and be Sakura's fiancee!" he said.

"Next, it is um-Na-what?!"

"What?"

"Um. It is um-um-Naruto from the um-Naruto cast." (Note: there is no exclamation mark.)

Naruto jumped onto the stage where Sebastian stood. He climbed into a bed.

"Young master, it is time to wake up," Sebastian said, his eyebrow twitching. He is treating this, this bitch as his master?

Naruto got up and sighed.

"Young master, I've have prepared bread, cake and scones today. Which would suit your tastes?"

"I want ramen! Nothing else would be better than starting the day with ramen in bed!" Naruto chirped brightly.

Everyone sweatdropped.

"Im afraid we don't have any," Sebastian said, his eyebrow still twitching.

"What?! What kind of butler are you?! In the name of fishcakes-um-I mean the Phantomhive, prepare beef ramen this instant!" Naruto shouted.

Sebastian bowed. "Yes, young master. Ramen will be prepared in ten minutes time."

Sebastian left the room, leaving Naruto alone. Ten minutes later, Sebastian arrived with ramen. Naruto slurped it down greedily.

"Is there anymore?"

Everyone sweatdropped again.

"I'm afraid not." Sebastian said with a bow.

"Well, then you're the worst butler ever, and for that you are gonna pay!"

"Hmn?"

"Shadow Clone Ninjutsu!"

Thousands of Narutos appeared.

"Rasengan!" They shouted as they rushed towards Sebastian.

Sebastian dodged their attacks with ease, slashing the clones. He grabbed Naruto by the scruff of his neck.

"Rule no.1, No fighting. Do you not understand?" Sebastian roared.

Naruto nodded his head frantically. Sebastian put him down. "You are disqualified!" he told Naruto.

"What?!" Naruto yelped.

"Good riddance," Sasuke muttered.

Kakashi just shooked his head.

"Have fun," Sebastian picked Naruto up and threw him out of the building. Like a piece of trash.

Miko the co-director stood up, her eyes watery. "You are so slammin' hot yet so cruel, Sebby!" she cried. "Please let him continue!"

"Miko, calm down..." Hayuka tried to calm her best friend down.

"Such a sweet boy can't be disqualified like that!" Miko cried.

"Sebastian, qualify him. Take this as orders from your master," Hayuka ordered.

"And dump him into the Torture Chamber as punishment," Natsuka added.

Sebastian looked at Ciel, who nodded. Sighing, he opened the door, and dragged a weeping Naruto without a word as he strode to the Torture Chamber and threw him in there.

"Wait what!" Naruto screamed as he went through one hell of a torture.

"You're qualified," everyone said casually.

"Still good riddance," Sasuke muttered. "Peace and quiet at last."

Sasuke and Kakashi flinched as they heard the torturous yells in the chamber.

"Now.. moving on..." Hayuka looked at the slips of paper.


Hayuka: Ok. Done and over with. Ratings? I, for one, give 5.

Mikasa: Hmm.. 4.

Natsuka: I agree with Mikasa. 4.

Miko: SIX!

Hayuka: Um.. Miko? Are you alright?

Miko; No.

Hayuka: Then that's it. Kindly wait for the next chapter patiently, the "Auditions for Ciel Phantomhive II"