Racing Hearts

AU. When Sarah's father returns to her life years later claiming he wants to make amends she struggles a bit with the decision of letting the man who once betrayed her into her heart again? Will her family make her see there's forgiveness after all?

This couldn't be happening, not to them. They'd careful, hadn't they? Sarah stared at the pregnancy test in front of her. She was overthinking again. She and Connor had just gotten engaged. They'd talked about having kids down the line but she wasn't sure if this would be right moment to do so, she allowed herself to fall back on the bed.

"Sarah?" Came Connor's voice. "Babe, are you in here?" Sarah's senses began spiking. "Maggie told me you'd gotten off early because you didn't feel well, why didn't you tell me?"

He looked worried. She must have seemed worse because his face didn't change once he saw her.

And she broke into tears because she didn't know what else to do.

"Sarah? What happened? Baby, talk to me.."

"I'm sorry..." Why was she apologizing? Connor held her close, she leaned into his shirt and took in his scent. He was already a fellow and was older than her, she'd barely made it through medical school and her internship with Dr. Charles had been a strike of luck and the pulling of strings on both her mentor's part and her boyfriend's.

"Why are you sorry?" He kissed her forehead. "Maggie said you weren't feeling well, I thought you'd stay at the hospital, baby.. what's going on?" Sarah cleaned her face and broke the hug, she took the small box from behind the pillow.

Connor's eyes were full of confusion and then realization hit him. "Are you..."

"Haven't taken it yet. I just sat here and contemplating all the reasons this is crazy." She told him. Connor's expression softened. "Don't look at me like that, we can't possibly let this happen right now, you got that new fellow coming in, the one Dr. Latham really likes and I just got back my career back on track, I can't be more behind and..."

"Sarah..." Connor smiled. "Breathe, we'll work this out, if this happens now then it's okay, we'll make it work."

"How?" She cut him off. "I don't think Goodwin will take it too kindly if I resign..."

"Why do you even have to?" Connor asked. "Natalie made it work, you can too."

Sarah sighed. "We're not there yet Connor, we just got engaged..."

"So?" He laughed. "It's not like our relationship has been conventional Sarah but we are together and we love each other, that counts right?"

She nodded. How was it that he always managed to calm her down. "Besides, we don't even know if..."

"I'm late, like really, really late..." Sarah said.

"Okay, then let's found out." Connor smiled taking her hands in his. "And if this is meant to happen now then it happens and we get through it."

"Okay."

She sat there, his hand never leaving hers and waited. Connor kissed her hand and she closed her eyes, she kept thinking about the outcome and what a baby would mean, not because of money obviously but because she wondered if she would be a good mother, she already knew Connor would be great but she wasn't too keen on children, she struggled to connect with them, maybe because her mother hadn't been around much and she never really had a father.

Connor's phone buzzed and she closed her eyes.

It was time.


"Well, doctors do make the worst patients." Maggie pointed out. "But Sarah honey, Connor is there for you. Above anyone else and I don't think he'll judge you. Do you want me to page him?"

Sarah froze. She might have been six when Robert left but she'd recognize him anywhere.

"Hello Sarah." Her father said softly. "I was hoping to catch you, can we talk?"

Maggie stood beside her, she'd forgotten about her completely.

"I'm sorry I can't right now, I have work to do." Sarah told Robert.

"Really? I haven't seen you around all week and people told me you were on leave, I hope everything is okay." He told her in a soft voice. Sarah felt her knees give in a little.

"Dr. Haywood?" Dr. Charles said behind Sarah. "Everything okay? We aren't done with our session... Dr. Reese, I believe Dr. Rhodes was looking for you..."

"Of course, thank you." Sarah took her leave and Maggie then paged Connor to get his butt down to the Lounge.

Nice save Daniel. As soon as Sarah closed the door behind her, she gasped for air, memories she had repressed came back to her, she remembered having her mother explain to her that Robert would not come back home.

Sarah couldn't really understand why, her father had just taken her to school that morning and given her a kiss and a hug, but never had he explained he'd not come back home.

She remembered wanting to write to him and tell him she'd want to go and live with him. She'd always loved her dad reading her stories and taking her to school.

And he'd never come home again. Sarah had not seen her father in almost 30 years and he'd had the nerve to greet her and hope to talk?

"Sarah?" Connor's voice pulled her back from her thoughts, Maggie was right, he looked tired but just as handsome as ever. "What happened, are you alright?"

"I'm sorry." Sarah said as soon as she saw him. "I'm sorry..." His expression softened as she had not realized she was crying, Connor held her just as he always did when she needed him. "I just, I wasn't ready to face him and deal with everything."

"You saw him." It wasn't a question. Connor's blood began to boil as Sarah's expression became solem. "Did he say anything to you?"

"He asked me if we could talk." She told him. "I don't think I'm ready for that..."

"You don't have to be. This is your choice to make." Connor said. "He made a decision a long time ago and now you get to make one too."

"He's in session with Dr. Charles?" Sarah inquired. Connor sighed.

"He asked for a referral with him..." He told her. "People with his prognosis need to process what might happen to them..." Sarah huffed.

"I know..." Sarah said. "I mean I get that he's dying but what if he's been been dead to me all this time? What does that say about me?"


Connor opened his eyes at the sound of the baby monitor, but he noticed Sarah wasn't in bed. "Babe?" He got out of bed slowly.

"I hurried so they wouldn't all wake up." Sarah smiled glancing over at Connor. She felt him wrap his arms around her waist and she leaned over to kiss him.

"You should go back to bed, your shift starts early tomorrow." Connor said softly. "Unless..." .

"I need to go back to work, I'm not going to let my insecurities slow me down..." she told him. "Dr Charles is counting on me."

Connor sighed and kissed her softly on the lips. "Alright."

They stayed watching the babies for a little longer and Sarah thought of that first moment she'd found out she was pregnant and how Connor had made her feel safe even though she felt as if the world was closing on her.

She felt like that now too.


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