Disclaimer: I do not own KWMS and P&P... all rights reserved to their owners...

AN: This was one of my favourite scenes in P&P... that was really awesome...

Chapter 11


It was such a perfect day for an outing.

Yet also that day, time stood still for Misaki.

For her, she could not expect what the man in front of her, Takumi Usui, had said, which was still echoing on her mind.

'...That I love you...'

She had this puzzled looked on her face, wondering how it all happened. As she continued to stare at Usui for a very long time, Usui himself continued to speak in a low, soft voice, "I know you would not believe me, I expected you to; you think of it very impossible to happen, yet it is all true. I love you, Misaki... despite all the pains I have to go through for loving you..."

'Pains?' Misaki asked herself and felt pity on the man himself.

"I thought of all the possible consequences I will have to go through... I have to consider things such as your lower status in birth against the noble lineage of my family, my family's expectations of me that I have to destroy, the humiliation that my aunt might bestow upon you, and I cannot bear myself to even think you will have to suffer because of me. I tried all my powers to fight these feelings, yet I found myself could no longer stop them from overflowing..."

"Wait, I didn't ask you to fall for me in the first place..."

"... That is why I asked of you to end my sufferings. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

From what she heard, pity turned into anger as he unknowingly insulted her, but then again controlled herself and said, "I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you. Believe me, I never knew of them."

There was a pause after that; Usui expected of her to say something more, but there were no more words came from Misaki.

"I...is that all your reply?"

"Yes"

"Is that a rejection?"

"I am pretty sure that you can overcome it by initially remembering those things that you should have gone through and be happy that you don't have to do it."

It was Usui's turn to be confused. "May I ask why such an answer?"

Misaki laughed sarcastically at him and said, "And you have expected me to accept your offer? What a laugh it is then! Still I have my reasons of rejecting your offer..."

"What reasons?"

"Do you think I could bring myself to accept a man who has the power of ruining the happiness of other people and that I could not worry about mine?" Misaki asked, referring to her own happiness.

"I couldn't understand..."

"You deny it then, that you yourself interfered of your own friend's happiness as well as my friend, Kuuga and Sakura? You had done it even to your own cousin, Mr. Walker..."

"I do not deny it." Usui said with a straight face.

"How could you do it?"

"I believe I have done it for their sake."

"Their sake?" Misaki asked, confused.

"I ask of you... please do not ask any further. You yourself will not understand them fully..."Usui said.

"Then make me understand! Do you think of my friend as an opportunist? Or you just told me that because you didn't find any reasons of your interference of the two of them..." Misaki asked.

"No, I never thought of your friend that way... you should even thank me, not I only save my friend's life, but as well as yours... my friend's parents have decided who Kuuga will marry... unfortunately it is not your friend," Usui said frankly, "I tried to stop him from getting closer to Ms. Sakura so that both of them will not get hurt, but then again, even if there is no such arranged marriage, I myself would not agree with the union."

"Then why? Tell me why you..."

Usui, now upset, said"Do you want to know the truth? I could never agree all of it because of the lack of decorum of the community you lived..."

He stopped, for he felt he was hurting Misaki more, which was evident as he looked at her, shaking and all. Thinking that Misaki misunderstood what he said, he told her, "I'm sorry... I have crossed the line... I didn't mean to offend you of my honesty of this situation..."

There was an awkward pause between them; both could not bring themselves to look at the other, until Misaki found the courage to say, "What of your other acquaintance, Mr. Emile Garner?"

Usui then with a more heightened tone and an altered face, faced Misaki and asked, "What of Emile?"

"I believe that you also have a role in destroying my friend's life by denying of his inheritance he should have received from your father out of jealousy..."

"Jealousy? Miss Ayuzawa, I think you do not..."

"Then again, are you attempting to hide this again from me?"

"You have gathered the wrong information, Miss Ayuzawa. To tell you the truth, it was not my fault that we cut our financial support to Emile."Usui said.

"Oh, really? Do you expect me to believe you rather than my friend?"

"If he is indeed your friend, then why on earth he would not tell you anything about his misfortunes other than he is indeed hiding something from you?" Usui asked with a bit of anger, "I may advise you, Miss Ayuzawa, he is not what you think of him as a friend. If such reasons made you reject my offer, then I believe they were all unreasonable."

"And why is it then?"

"You believe in what your friend said not knowing the whole truth. You prefer someone closer to you in relations without considering the other side of the problem, and I believe that you are not like any other people in this world, thinking very differently from them... such things I never expected from someone like you."

"And those are the words which are coming from a gentleman such as you? Believe me, had you showed yourself properly and gently, I may have considered your offer now, but you showed otherwise, in such a proud manner, too. This I am telling you, Mr. Takumi Usui. Even if you and I are the last people on earth, I would never bring myself to marry you," Misaki said angrily.

Bewildered, Usui almost did not recover from what she said. He felt as if he was pierced with a thousand arrows. Finally, he took a deep breath, said bitterly, "I see. Well then, I hope you find your happiness, and I bid you farewell." Then he left.

As soon as he was out of sight, she felt that all her strength left her, and all of the sudden, she leaned on a nearby tree, sat down and, unexpectedly, cried.

Yet as she cried, something else also cried. It was not very long that it rained.

She looked up in the sky, for a while she remembered it so clear and bright, yet she did not even expect it now to be so dark. She waited for the rain to stop, and didn't move from her spot; an hour later, she thought it would took longer for it to happen, she rose and walked all the way to the lodge. Yet, unluckily, as she stepped in front of the floor, the rain suddenly stopped.

"Oh, for crying out loud!" she said angrily, yet that kind of anger dissolved easily, for her anger towards a certain someone prevailed.

She entered her room, dressed herself with dry clothes, lain in the bed, and continued crying until she fell asleep.

-0-

Usui left Misaki hurriedly. He wished for the wind to blow his feelings away; as he arrived in the stables near the pavilion where everybody was, it started to rain. He heard his aunt telling him to come inside, yet, as if he did not hear her, without a word, he mounted on his horse and rode back in the mansion. As he arrived in his room, he dressed, put on a robe and sat on his chair in his study. He wasn't himself; the hurt was just too great for him. It was just his first time having those feelings; he rarely notices other women who would flirt at him, more likely not at all. He closed his eyes for awhile; then, he rose and walked towards the big, fancy window. He stared outside. The sky was so dark, the rain poured heavily. As he saw the forest part of his aunt's property, he remembered Misaki.

"That's right. The rain already poured when I arrived by the pavilion, and she wasn't even there..." he said to himself. He chuckled sarcastically at himself, and said, "How shameful for a gentleman like me... leaving a lady in the rain..."

He sighed heavily, closed his eyes and tried to stop the tears away. As he opened them, he looked at the table and saw his pen, and a few papers. Near the table, there was a cage with a pigeon, which he brought home from town coincidentally near the lodge where Misaki a week before her arrival; he himself tended its wounds and planned to free it when it is fully healed. It was now time for it to happen, he decided.

He sat back to his chair, grabbed his pen and started to write.

-0-

It was not until morning the next day when she woke up. She heard footsteps on the room where Inspector Norris and his wife were, indicating that they returned home. Instead of going to them, she walked by the window, looking outside as the sun started to rise. Then, she heard a tap in the window; there, she saw a bird, and on its back attached a letter. She opened the window and brought the bird inside, took the letter and let the bird fly. On the letter, she was surprised that it was addressed to her. She opened it and it read:

Madame,

It pains me every time I think about what happened yesterday, yet I did not feel any regret of telling my feelings for you. But I would like to beg for forgiveness of leaving you in the rain, not even bothering to check you, and I wished for your good health. Again, I ask for apologies and hope for you to read the entire letter, and what I am about to write to you is the complete truth.

From your accounts that you've told me yesterday, I wished that I have told you everything back then for to make myself clear, but I am not saying that I have no faults on you. But, for y wish for clarity of those accounts, here I begin:

The first you have said about my interference between the two of our friends, Kuuga and Miss Hanazono, and that, I am truly sorry. I have told that Kuuga was already arranged in marriage by his parents; what their objectives and his actions were beyond my control. Ever since our friendship began, he was dependent on me, and I feel responsible of him. I wanted both of them the best, yet I do not want them to get hurt. My interference was also rooted from what I have done, as you have said, with my cousin, Walker, who I will reveal to you, the only person from my family circle, and I beg that you keep it as a secret, that all of the people who knew him as my cousin were deceived, for he is my half brother. I shall tell you my story so that you will understand further.

I was an illegitimate child, born from my mother in an unknown Japanese father. I was dubbed as the disgrace of the family, and the only thing I have done was to be born. My mother died in childbirth in some faraway place; Gerard was three years old back then. My foster father, Jiro Usui, my mother's cousin, raised me as his own son, for he had no heir to his properties, yet I was lucky enough to experience his love. I lived in the Usui Villa, where I was frequently visited by Gerard and he and Emile were my playmates.

Three years ago, Gerard was engaged with Miss Anne Scarlet; Gerard was the current head of the Walker family back then, a marriage which was approved by the whole family. I, too, wished for Gerard's happiness out of his kindness towards me, until a week before the marriage, unfortunately, I gained knowledge of Ms. Scarlet's true intention; she was after the Walker fortune. I confronted her, and she proudly declared in front of me, boasted on how she used Gerard to get what she wants, which were all heard by Gerard. The marriage was immediately cut off. It was not long that she married another man and robbed him of his riches. Gerard was thankful of me, and that he married his long-time best friend, Ms. Eloise, and lived happily ever since, now with a son. On the same year of his engagement with Ms. Selene months after his previous engagement, I was introduced as Gerard's cousin and the sole heir of the Usui fortune. Happiness overflowed within the family, and it was the first time that I gained everyone's acceptance which I longed when I was young.

This is my initial reason why I interfered between Kuuga and Miss Hanazono; I promised myself not to let it happen to those who I cherish. Yet, I have thought over it, and I now realized clearly, that your friend's affection towards Kuuga was real. With that, I am deeply sorry for what I have done, but like I said, it is beyond my control of what he will do in the future.

The second account you told me about Emile Garner deeply shocked me that you had the knowledge of it, and I wish to clarify it to you.

Five years prior to my adoption, the late Mr. Usui's loyal steward, Mr. Percy Garner, died, and he promised to help his son Emile, and raised Emile with me as his children. I never competed of his fatherly love; I was grateful enough of what he has done to me. We grew up together, and then I never realize something would destroy all of the bond we shared; a hidden intention and a scheme against us.

Months after Gerard's marriage, he was on the brink of death. His last will was that I to inherit his properties, while Emile was given a thousand pounds and a parsonage on some village. But he said he wanted to study law, and instead of giving him the parsonage, he asked for money to bring him to law school, which I and Gerard agreed. We gave him the money, and it was months after, he told us that he didn't like the school and instead wanted to study medicine. He again asked for money, and by this time, we were suspicious of him, and I had hope that our fears were false. For another time, he returned, asking money for his lodge, and by this time, Gerard and I followed him secretly, and we discovered that he gambled all the money we gave to him. He contacted the schools which he attended, and there were no records of him there. We tried to confront him, but he ran away, and the last time we heard of him, he was now in the militia. It was such a disgraceful account, and we would like to keep it a secret for his sake, too.

There concludes my side on these accounts. It brings me pain to tell you, but I trust you to keep this for yourself. If you like to burn it, then I give you my permission to do so. There is one more thing that I would like to ask of you, and that I wished to be acquainted with you despite what happened. I fully understand your feelings for me, and I am deeply sorry for what I have done to you. Like I said before, I never felt any regrets of telling my feelings for you, and I hope that we could stay as what we were.

I again wished for your happiness and good health, and I bid you, good day, madame.

Takumi Usui

Thus ended Usui's letter to Misaki. Misaki, on the other hand, was shaking terribly, and tears were beginning to flow from her eyes uncontrollably. She herself was confused why she was crying, she never felt anything for him after all. Or, did she?

_END_


Hey guys! Long time no update! LOL!

Anyways, I present you another crappy, confusing, long, whatsoever story... and a cliffhanger, too! I'm really sorry to violetshade for making you mad again with this cliffie (cliffhanger), that's just my new style... XD (and yep, she somehow like Tora for a bit... hehe...)

Anyways, thanks for those who waited really patiently for the update, and I'm really sorry for the late update... two weeks of exam period and prepare for a reporting, project (a play) and many more... so tired...

And again (how many times I ask for apology?) I'm sorry to Fin-chan, Ofe-chan, Lexie-chan for not reviewing... if I have, then I'm sorry that I didn't remember... such a hectic schedule for me...

Anyways, I'll try to update this weekend... I wanted to...

Also, I'm overly excited with my newest ideas playing in my mind... (2 for Maid-sama, 1 for S.A. though not really sure for that, and a crossover! YAY! Maybe...)

Anyway... thanks for all your support!

Lovelots!