One chapter will talk about the past, one about the present until we reach the point where we began with the present. Confusing much? It keeps things interesting. ;)

Same disclaimer applies-Twilight belongs to S.M., but the idea of this story is mine.

Many thanks to my awesome betas and friends - TeamAllTwilight and m0t0b33. And to my newest help: Momma Laura.


Present time

Why did I agree to leave the bachelorette party to the moms?

Why?

WHY?

Because I'm an idiot—that's why.

Now I have to spend the whole weekend locked with them in the house and enjoy it.

Besides the friends I invited—who will leave at some point during the night. The family will stay—fabulous!

Edward's been kidnapped. It happened last night, compliments of Emmett and Carlisle; he was taken to his parents' house.

All I hope is that they don't bring strippers—for either party, mine or his.

Right now I'm swamped in presents, and everyone is giving me advice on how to be a good wife and how to keep my husband in line.

This is so overrated. I don't need this.

I've been living with Edward for over a year, and we never stepped on each other's toes. Ever.

We did have disagreements, but I don't think we fought—unless we count that unfortunate, horrible moment when he got hurt.

Esme is in charge of the cocktails, Rose brought the cookies, and I just called for take-out.

Besides family, I invited my good old friend from college and from my first job, Angela. Then there are most of the girls that worked in my team or on Edward's team when I was part of it. We're about fifteen, barely fitting in the living room.

I have tons of girly presents from clothing articles I may or may not like, to nail polish and makeup boxes, even kinky presents from Alice and Rose making me quickly hide them from the moms. Seriously.

While I'm upstairs indulging them and putting on a dress Esme got me, I hear the doorbell ringing. The food.

Great, because I'm hungry. And I need to eat if I want to taste some of Esme's delicious cocktails.

Edward's going to be upset because we wasted his alcohol, but he doesn't even drink that much, so I really don't see why we can't use it for a good cause.

The dress is cute, maybe shorter than my usual comfort zone, but I really love it. The upper part is black with sleeves that reach my elbow, and the pleated skirt is white with black. Before I go downstairs, I step into a pair of black high heels just to do the dress justice.

"Wooow!" Vic sees me first.

Then follows a chorus of cat-calls.

I roll my eyes at my friends and twirl on the spot, smiling. "I love it. Thank you, Esme."

"I'm really happy you like it. Now, let's get this party started!" she cheers.

Between cocktails, everyone shares insights on married life or how to have a healthy relationship.

"It will be different when you get married. You'll see how everything changes."

"Nothing's changed so far," I mumble. "Except that I'm kept away from him."

Mom huffs. "I still can't believe you went to the city hall without us!"

"It was planned since forever to sign the papers on thirteenth—the day we met. We didn't even know when or where it landed on the calendar. Besides, we had James and Victoria." I pat my sister-in-law's hand.

"Do you have pictures?" Angela asks, sipping from her glass.

"Not yet. They'll email them to us at some point next week."

"Send me some."

"Me, too!" a few other voices echo her.

"Oooor you can post them on Facebook." Victoria nudges me with her leg.

"That's better," I agree. "So you say everything changes. How's that?" I insist, because everyone says that, and I can't believe it.

"One, you get more territorial—both of you," Rose offers with a small smile.

"At first, it is the same until you make the transition to a routine you'll get sick of," Mom adds.

"You need to keep everything spiced up."

I turn red, looking at Kim. "Uh, okay."

"And no more going out separately, or buying things without talking to each other."

"You're lucky you work in the same place and can keep an eye on him."

"If one of you has to go with work out of the city, always talk and keep in contact."

"It may sound suffocating, but it will keep the relationship strong."

"Don't forget to fight every now and then," Esme quips up after a small pause.

"Sorry?" I choke on my drink.

"Yes, honey." Mom nods. "Pick a fight with him…over the silliest things." She winks.

Oh, God!

I want to die.

They have no idea how healthy our sex life is. We don't need any more spicing up.

"Trust me," Rose says quietly. "In a few years, you'll remember this. In time, even sleeping together turns routine."

I don't believe that.

We've been together for three years. Not for one moment did I do anything out of routine with Edward.

We always felt it when we did it. Of course, there were times when we just wanted to be, and those were good, too. We never forced anything.

"Make him help you," Angela tells me.

"Edward's not allowed in the kitchen," I mutter. "He's a disaster."

Esme laughs. "I lost all hope of him being any good in the kitchen when I made him just look at my rice and stir while I got dressed. He was ten, I think. Not two minutes after I left, he started shouting for me and…before I made it to the kitchen, the sprinklers were on."

I nod in agreement because I've witnessed his cooking skills first hand. "Though…" I muse aloud. "He did make me pancakes for my birthday. They were barely cooked or burnt, but it was progress from that time he splattered the pancakes on the ceiling."

Everyone starts laughing and starts sharing amusing stuff about their husbands and boyfriends.

Late into the night, my friends leave; only the family and Alice stay. She's been awfully quiet.

After they go to bed, I stack my dishwasher for later then pour myself another cocktail since I'm not tired.

I have a lot to think about.

"Oh, you can't sleep, either?" Alice asks from the doorway.

"I'm too buzzed to sleep," I reply. "Let's go to my room," I suggest.

We take a half empty bottle of vodka with us. I rest against the headboard, taking my smokes from the nightstand. I need one badly.

"So, Alice," I start, eyeing her. "You didn't say anything… Don't you have any advice for me?"

"I'm not good with relationships. I guess I'm a pro at making the dream wedding for people, but I can't even find a decent boyfriend. I'm picky, too."

"Tell me about it."

"You did pretty well."

I beam at her, downing my glass. "I did, huh? Edward's everything I could ever want."

"That's how it should be." She nods, sipping from her glass.

"Your criteria? Come on, tell me. Let me try my matchmaking skills on you."

"Uh, they have to be blond with blue eyes, dimples, totally laid back to compensate with my wild self." She taps her chin. "If they have a tattoo, I'll marry them on spot."

I giggle. "Well, maybe you should stay away from James, then. Or Vic will kill you." I laugh.

"Uh, no. He's too serious anyway."

"I don't think you met James. Yeah, he can be serious and all business at work, but if we go out…damn. He's the crazy one."

I pour myself another shot of vodka, sloshing the glass, and making the drink end up on the bed.

Oops.

We burst in a fit of giggles.

Alice starts telling me about some guy she used to date, but then they broke up when she didn't have enough time for the relationship.

Somehow, we both fall asleep on the wet, stinking of vodka bed.

I wake up when someone shakes my shoulder.

Phew. It stinks in here.

"So I leave my wife for a night alone and find her in bed with another woman?"

"Edward!" I shout, but instantly regret it.

I have the mother of all headaches.

"Why so loud, hon?" Alice moans from the foot of the bed.

"Did I miss something?" Edward jokes.

"Edward, go away," I moan, flopping on my stomach. "And do something about that light!"

"Baby, that's the sun. And you should wake up. Apparently, we have plans for tonight. The families are taking us to a club. VIP tickets or something."

"Tell them to take the tickets and shove them up their asses. I wanna sleep."

"Holy shit! Hi, Edward!" I hear Alice squeaking. "Oh, shit. Headache."

"Did you wake her?" I hear Mom's voice from the doorway.

"Why is everyone so loud today?" I protest, putting the pillow over my head.

Surprisingly, they go quiet, and I manage to fall asleep again. Next time I wake up, I find Edward next to me, typing on the laptop with a huge smile on his face.

Still sleepy and confused about why he's home, I shuffle closer and hug him around the waist, propping my head on his knee.

"Feeling better, baby?" he whispers, stroking my hair.

"Uh, what?"

"Do you remember what happened earlier?" he checks, smirking.

"Not sure…"

"I came home to find you in bed with Alice."

"God. I'm so sorry. Did I talk to you?"

"A little. You had a headache, so I let you sleep and closed the drapes."

"You're an angel. And I'm really sorry about Alice in here. We got talking last night. I drank too much."

He snorts, leaning down to kiss my nose. "Remember how you warned me about not drinking? Then you go and do it."

"I feel awful. Bleah. I need to brush my teeth."

"Go, you can also take a shower; you reek of alcohol."

"Oh!" I shout. "I poured vodka on the bed at some point…"

"You, what?" Edward shouts back.

"I…" I bite my lip. "I was drunk."

His eyes jump to the laptop when it pings. Smiling, he starts typing again.

"What's up?" I lean over him to see him writing on an Instant Messenger window. "Who's Jazz Wit?"

"Jasper. I told you 'bout him." He keeps typing. "My college friend."

"Oh. You're talking again!"

"Yeah, he's coming to New York in a couple weeks."

I grin. "Make him come sooner. Invite him to the wedding. I bet you'd love to have your friend there." I nudge him, pecking his cheek before skipping to the bathroom.


Pictures in my FB group as usual.