Authors note
This fic is proving more popular than I'd imagined, thank you so much for the reviews/faves/follows!
"You'd be right." She replied, her heartbeat racing at Cas's touch. As his fingers traced over her skin, she looked into his eyes for the first time since she'd got here. Even here, and now they were the same perfect inky blue that she loved.
"Wow. Our family really is cursed"
"Dean…" Sam began.
"You should be a normal, happy kid who knows jack squat about hunting, demons… angels! I wanted this to end with me, I never wanted any family I might be lucky enough to have to be dragged into this life"
"I know, but sometimes we don't get to choose. Life's a bitch"
He looked at her.
"What? You taught me that I'll have you know."
"What else did I teach you, it's not all bad right?"
She laughed.
"No, though you gave up trying to teach me American sports when I was about eight. Any kind of sport actually…."
"Listen, we should probably head back to the bunker for now"
"The Men of Letters bunker? I love that place. You brought me a couple of times when I was younger"
"Really?"
"Safest place to leave us whilst you… y'know"
"So I still hunt?"
"Yes, but it's not like it was for you two growing up. You didn't want that for me, So you put me in boarding school to keep me safe and out of the life"
"Boarding school? I put my kid in boarding school- what am I, a millionaire?"
"No. You married into a wealthy Hunter family though…."
"So your Mom is a hunter?"
"Born and bred, literally. Mums family have been hunting since forever, but they made a lot of money in business early on in order to appear respectable and all."
Some time later, they arrived at the bunker. The familiarity of it comforted her a little, but she still felt weird. Here she was, with her Dad and Uncle when they were her age, and Cas who had no idea who she was, no Idea of the connection they shared, the future they had.
She sat down on the couch as the brothers headed off to find out if there were any books that might be of use. She'd combed the place with a fine tooth comb in her own time but had never found anything to explain her markings, or what any of the symbols meant. She only knew that demons seemed to want her dead because of them, and that they'd all rather be tortured than tell her why.
Cas sat next to her.
"This must be very strange for you"
"Yeah. I'm hanging out with my dad and my uncle when they are my age and you…."
She caught herself looking into those inky blues again.
"and you who looks exactly the same, not that that's a surprise…."
"But surely I am older in your time?"
"Technically yes, but your presence in Jimmys body fundamentally altered the DNA on a cellular level. You don't age Cas, not physically anyway."
"Oh. Anything else I should know?"
"Cas, there's so much… so much I want to tell you, I'm just afraid…." She began, stopping to consider her thoughts. As she did, she noticed Cas's hand had found its way on to hers. His touch always calmed her, made her feel normal when she felt like a freak. He pushed her sleeve up, gently and slowly, as if he instinctively knew how self conscious she was of her markings. She always wore long sleeves, and was somewhat grateful to be born in a country where that was a necessity most of the time anyway. He cocked his head to the side the way he always did when he was thinking about something. She couldn't help but smile, he looked adorable.
"Do they hurt?"
"No, but they feel strange whenever I'm near a demon. I can't explain it exactly, but they just seem to react somehow. Sometimes I can sense a demon is nearby just by the feeling I get "
"I've never seen anything like them, not in the thousands of years of my existence. But I must say, I find them beautiful"
Her heart caught in her mouth. Her mind went back five years when they were in the early stages of their relationship. They were sat in living room of her Mums family home, and she had allowed him to see the markings fully, for the first time.
"I've never seen anything like them, not in the thousands of years of my existence. But I must say, I find them beautiful" Were the exact words he'd said to her then, followed by their first kiss.
As she filtered back to the present, she realised Cas was looking at her, awaiting a response with the same puppy eyed look that had made her fall in love with him In the first place. She wanted to lean in, kiss that soft, gentle mouth but she held back. This was Cas's first day as a human being. She knew it was going to take him some time to understand the more subtle aspects of human interaction. She didn't want to go diving in to the deep end. No matter how much her body screamed otherwise.
"Are you Ok?"
"Yes, sorry it's just….. that was the exact same thing you said to me, when we first….started dating" she spoke, deciding it was best to leave the kiss out for now.
"It would seem the events are destined to play out, one way or another"
She wanted nothing more than for their story to begin again, here and now. But she felt guilty somehow, for wanting something that he had no idea about. In her time, he'd come to terms with his humanity, his destiny. He'd only just fallen in this time, and she knew he needed time to adjust, to find his way.
"Cas, I just want you to know that….I know you aren't my husband in this time. Hell, you don't know the first thing about m. I don't expect you to… fall in love with me or something. You need time, to adjust to this….. being human, finding your way, your purpose. That has to come first, Ok?" As she said it, she could feel a lump in her throat, and tears forming in her eyes. She refused to let anyone see her cry, so she hurried back to the room she'd decided was hers, bumping into the brothers on her way.
"Cas, what did you do?" Dean asked.
"She's upset. She is finding it difficult to be around me"
"I should go talk to her" Sam offered.
"No, I'll do it" Dean replied.
"But you hate talking, especially about feelings, and with girls"
"This is different Sammy. She's my kid, or will be soon…. I guess."
"Ok, just don't screw it up"
He walked over to the room where he'd seen her heading. The door was open. He pushed it open lightly, and saw her sat in the chair, legs curled underneath, arms wrapped around one of the old cushions.
"Thought for sure you'd send Sammy"
"I'm not incapable of talking about feelings you know"
"I know."
"So…."
"This is hard, really hard. I'm with my dad and my uncle, who happen to be the same age as me and have no clue about me. I'm also stuck with my future husband who has just fallen from Heaven and has no clue about being a human being, and being in love….with me"
"We'll figure out how to send you back"
"Back to what? A future where I might not even exist? What if I cant go back and I'm stuck here!"
"That wont happen, I promise. We will get you back, to your own future, to Cas" he replied, forcing himself to say the last part.
"Don't worry, you were just as freaked out by it in my time. It took you a while to come around. There's something you need to know, about Cas"
"What?"
"He doesn't age. That's exactly how he looks on our wedding day, and everyday after that. So to the untrained eye, we look like a normal couple."
"But what about you, you'll age?"
"Sure, but I'll worry about that later. Right now, or then…I just wanted to be with him, and that's it"
She stood up and hugged him. He drew her in tight, not wanting to let her go. Her presence was definitely waking up his paternal instincts somehow. He kissed her on the head before allowing his arms to fall to his sides.
"I'll leave you to sleep, Ok?"
"Thank you, you're much better at this then you think y'know" she smiled.
As she pulled back the covers and got in to bed, she realised that this was the first night she'd slept alone in a long time, and she didn't like it. She missed his presence, him stroking her hair until she fell asleep. She missed him.
