Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

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13. CONFESSIONS

I smiled warmly at Carlisle, returning the gesture and stepping forth, "Please, just call me Maddy." I prepared to move one hand to shake his but was surprised (I was getting a lot of those recently) when instead Carlisle pulled me into a gentle hug. I stiffened, unsure of what to do when my eyes widened as he started to speak.

"Thank you," he whispered fervently in my ear. He pulled back, still keeping a light grip on my shoulders. "You don't know how much I was looking forward to finally meeting you, to thank you for all you've done," he said, gratitude in every line of his perfect face.

"I-I haven't done much of anything," I protested, flushing slightly that I had become so flustered I actually stuttered.

"Nonsense!" Esme refuted immediately, Carlisle passing me to her so she could hug me gently as well. "Loving Jasper like you do would be enough reason to thank you," she said as she pulled back to smile warmly at me.

"We'd been worried about Jasper and Edward being alone with the rest of us paired together," Carlisle started, wrapping his arm around Esme's shoulder as Jasper wrapped one around my waist, pulling me to his side, when I was released from Esme's embrace. "Especially Jasper. He'd been having such a hard time since he joined our coven and with such a difficult past we feared..." he trailed off, not wanting to say more and he didn't need to. They were afraid with the prominent scars (to vampires at least), a blatant symbol of his violent past for all of his kind to see, that he would never find someone. Obviously they never expected him to find a partner in a human.

I looked up softly at Jasper, placing my hand lightly on his chest as he returned the soft gaze and lifted his hand to meet mine, squeezing it gently. "I understand," I whispered, my emotions all over the place as I thought on Jasper's past, burdened with a seemingly endless existence of solitude thanks to the physical evidence of his past, unable to bear his nature thanks to his gift, and no Alice to have picked him up at his lowest. This Jasper must have much more mental fortitude and strength than his alternate self but it was born from added years of quiet suffering and loneliness that the Cullens couldn't alleviate like Alice no doubt did in canon. I knew it wasn't my fault I couldn't be there for him, but I still felt guilty all the same for not being able to be there sooner. Why couldn't I have been born when Alice was and turned, no matter if it would have been painful, more so to even capture the attention of any vampire enough for them to turn me. I'm sure Jasper was forced to suffer through worse for longer.

"Yes, I believe you do," Carlisle murmured in reply and I managed to drag my eyes away from Jasper to look back to his father and see that understanding, knowing smile on his face. "You must be something quite special if even Rosalie warmed up to you." Rosalie only scowled and crossed her arms as Emmett laughed.

"We're just so glad Jasper found you, Maddy, he's been so much happier, it's like he's a new man," Esme added and she looked so emotional, I'm sure if she was still human, she would have at the least been tearing up.

"Esme," Jasper murmured, looking a bit emotional himself, no doubt feeling his adoptive mother's love and affection for him.

"I just wanted you to know that you became a part of this family as soon as you chose to accept and love Jasper the way you do, even if we didn't know it yet," she smiled, pulling away from Carlisle to give me another, closer hug. Much to my amazement, I felt myself starting to tear up, getting caught up in their unexpected open acceptance of me into their family.

"Thank you, it means a lot to hear you say that," I managed to say. And it did, I didn't think it would, but hearing it now it really, really did. Jasper smiled and kissed my temple as I was returned to him.

"Well, I'd love to spend some time talking to you about your gift, but it seems that Jasper plans on monopolizing you today," Carlisle said, amused as Jasper pressed me closer to him, his arm tightening a bit around my waist. "That's alright, we have plenty of time in the future. You two can go ahead and enjoy some time alone together."

"Actually," I interrupted, hesitating as I stopped them from all leaving to do their own thing. "There's something I've been meaning to tell Jasper for a while that might be better for you all to know since it technically involves your treaty with the La Push pack," I started, unsure as I stepped out of Jasper's arm to prepare my announcement.

"The treaty? Is it something serious?" Esme asked in worry.

"Well, I, well I'm not sure it-"

"Oh for goodness sake!" Rosalie interrupted. "One of those filthy wolves named Paul has been trying to force his way into Maddy's pants since they met at fourteen! That's what she's trying to say!" She said, tactlessly dropping the 'Paul' bomb on them. I didn't even have time to snap my head to the blond, horrified, when I flinched badly at a small cracking boom followed by feral snarling. My eyes finally settled on the strange sight of Emmett and Rosalie holding back a struggling, very furious and feral looking Jasper attempting to run out the door and Carlisle trying to calm him down, his words imperceptible to me as he spoke too fast for me to understand.

I didn't have time to contemplate their sudden actions and Esme at my side, half hugging me and rubbing my arm in comfort, my whole form shaking slightly from shock, when I was suddenly hit with a dizzying kaleidoscope of visions. I couldn't even manage to gasp properly, choking and coughing on my breath as I struggled to control my lungs as visions passed before my eyes too fast for me to fully see...but there were some scenes that stood out and occasionally repeated; Jasper attacking and easily maiming and killing an unaware Paul before his companions could even react, followed by migraine inducing flashes of blank or murky visions of what I could only assume was the ensuing fight, the rest of the Cullens following shortly concerned for him, more of those infuriating blanks, then fire.

Oh dear gods, no, there was fire! Funerals. Mass funerals in La Push and-nononononono- a funeral service at the Cullen's house. Where are they? Why can't I see who's there? Who was it?! Not Jasper, please not Jasper-

"Maddy, can you hear me? Sweetie, I need you to breath. Just copy Jasper's breathing. Can you feel it?" Carlisle's soothing voice reached me as if from far away, slightly echoing. Sweetie? Never thought I'd hear Carlisle say that...wait Jasper? I thought he was going all frothy rage.

It was then that I finally registered my back pressing against a cold and hard chest.

"N-Jasper?" I asked, my vision swimming as futures kept changing constantly, making my brain throb painfully in protest. I had only just realized that I was hyperventilating and repeating 'no' like a crazy person. Right, okay, having a bit of a breakdown.

"That's right, I'm here. Come back to me, darlin'," he murmured soothingly in my ear though I could hear the undertones of fear and worry.

"D-Don't-" I choked and coughed, unable to take in the necessary breath to speak.

"Breath, Maddy, deep breaths, follow Jasper's example," Carlisle instructed gently but firmly. But it was hard to focus on his even breathing with Jasper still planning to kill Paul, causing the painful influx of visions.

"Please, Jazz, don't...don't kill him, don't break t-the treaty, please!" I urged desperately. "It's not worth it," I choked out a sob, struggling hard not to cry as it would only make it harder to regain control of my erratic breathing.

"Don't say you're not worth it," Jasper whispered, pained. "You're worth more than I can ever offer."

I shook my head fervently. "Just please promise me you won't kill him or break the treaty," I urged. "Promise me, Jasper!" I pushed when I saw his hesitation between my shifting visions.

He gave a defeated sigh and slumped a little over my small form, tightening his loose hold on me. "I promise, dammit I don't want to, but I promise," he finally said and just like that, the intolerable influx of visions suddenly just stopped. My sight was dotted with spots as they finally were able to focus on my immediate surroundings. I gasped in a sharp, long breath and collapsed further into Jasper's arms, finally able to focus on steadying my breathing by following Jasper's example.

"...what did you see?" Rosalie asked quietly after the family watched me regain regular breathing under tense silence.

"Rosalie!" Esme gasped in shock at the seemingly insensitive question, her tone both horrified and reprimanding.

"So many visions," I croaked in answer. "Too many. I couldn't-" I shook my head, pushing the scenes clamoring my thoughts aside and focused. "I couldn't keep up with them all, but there were a few scenes, images, that I was able to catch...Jasper breaking the treaty and killing Paul and then so much white and blurs because I can't see those stupid wolves when they shift!" I growled in frustration and desperation. "And then you followed him, worried about him and more of those horrible blanks! I couldn't see the fight and I needed to!" I cried, my breath picking up before I felt a soothing wave of comfort and calm hit me. It helped a bit, but I was still shaking like a leaf.

"And then the fire..." I heard when they all collectively stopped breathing. "That horrible fire burning and all that smoke! And then the funerals at La Push and then...there was a closed coffin here," I choked. "And no one was here! I couldn't find any of you and I didn't-don't know- I couldn't see-"

"Shh, darlin', it ain't gonna happen anymore, remember? I promised ya I wouldn't and I won't," Jasper cooed, rubbing my back as I turned around and buried my head in his neck, not caring that I was clinging to him in front of his family.

"...I'm sorry," Rosalie whispered, her tone surprisingly remorseful. "If I hadn't gotten angry and blurted it out like that..."

"I would have had the visions regardless of how I told him," I brushed off, recovering myself quickly as I forcefully assured myself of the fact that the future I saw was no longer possible. "I wouldn't have been all here enough to try and calm him down myself." My lips quirked slightly as I shakily shifted to sitting on Jasper's lap, noting that we were seated on their couch. "It's just as well that I had a panic attack because of the visions. I doubt anything could have stopped Jasper more effectively than when my safety or health is in danger."

The tense atmosphere was finally broken when Emmett laughed at my comment. Jasper only let out a groan and dropped his head to my shoulder.

"It ain't a laughin' matter, darlin'. I thought my dead heart was gonna leap out my throat," he muttered in barely restrained relief. Emmett only laughed more at the response.

"Careful, brother, your south is showing," Emmett teased goodnaturedly. Jasper only raised the bird to him.

"Clear out if you have a problem with it," he scowled, only making Emmett laugh harder. The interchange drew smiles from everyone and I finally calmed enough that I was no longer shaking like a stupid chihuahua, how embarrassing.


I was extremely grateful when the Cullens did a wonderful job of pretending my little episode never happened and all moved to do their own thing but stayed in the area, Emmett playing video games on the couch, Esme curled up with a book on a sofa, Rosalie with a fashion magazine, and Carlisle had invited me to a friendly game of chess, Jasper the only one showing outward signs of concern by hovering. Not that I minded, I didn't exactly want to be alone with my thoughts at the moment.

"Are you sure you want to play me, Carlisle?" I asked, he and Esme told me to address them by their first name. "Centuries old vampire or not, I kind of have a built in cheat." I warned, having learned to play chess as soon as possible since it was kind of a staple in Twilight.

Carlisle only chuckled. "As does Edward, but that doesn't stop us from playing him either. Emmett especially likes to challenge him constantly despite knowing the most likely outcome."

"Oi! I'll beat that cheat one of these days!" Emmett growled playfully from the couch, making me laugh since I knew I was a stubborn loser like he was.

"Well, alright then! Forgive me ahead of time if I'm a little slow to make moves," I smiled. I'm kind of using that time to cheat with my visions, I added mentally, but I'd honestly rather cheat than lose a humiliating defeat to an age old vampire. Hey, I never claimed to be anything near a saint and I very much hated losing.

The game took much longer than an online one did with a human or computer opponent, Carlisle intentionally changing his moves constantly and at inhuman speeds in his head before he makes them, making visions flash by too fast for me to see, before he finally chooses a move and plays it. I also spent a lot of time looking at the board and choosing a move that would be better but also looking ahead to the end game to see if it would lead me to winning depending on his and my future moves.

Understandably, the first few moves I did, I more often than not lost at the end, but the more I changed my moves to my best advantage, the more often I started to win in my visions and the longer Carlisle took to make a move. I barely registered when the rest of the Cullens had actually migrated to watch our game in fascination, too absorbed in the match. Honestly, it was taking a lot of concentration for me to sort through visions his moves brought me then my own and Carlisle had to prove how effortless it was for him by also making small talk during the match, asking me questions on my gift, what triggered it, its limitations, theories on why those limitations exist, the possible further growth of my gift when human and how that growth could be triggered, etcetera, etcetera.

It made me feel rather smart to be able to actually answer well and provide sound theories though I knew it was because I had spent far too much time reading into and analyzing stories so I could write fanfiction in my previous life, but hey, if it's useful who am I to complain? I did, however take the opportunity of idle chatter to bring up something of relative importance.

"You guys like to play sports, yeah?" I asked casually as I moved a piece.

"Yes, we do, though we don't get much opportunity to," Carlisle answered easily, a slight question in his voice as he looked at me curiously.

"And baseball is your favorite, yes?" I stated more than asked, but still wanting confirmation.

"Hell yeah," was Emmett's enthusiastic reply, being the one to answer me instead. "America's favorite past time!" He grinned.

"Well, if you're all free tomorrow, you'll get a chance to play a game since there'll be a storm, very loud but no rain," I informed cheerily before skimming through visions after Carlisle made his move.

"Sweet! You hear that, Jasper?! You're seriously going down tomorrow!" Emmett growled enhusiastically, obviously very pleased with the news. Carlisle, who also seemed very happy with the news was much calmer about it and asked for as many details and I happily provided as accurate a time as possible and a description of the clearing they used after I looked for it in my visions.

Then finally, finally, after what seemed a small eternity, the match was decided. "Check mate," I said tiredly, but satisfied. Probably not the best idea to stretch my vision muscles after the onslaught i'd suffered earlier, but I wasn't about to give up my only advantage.

"My, I haven't had such a challenging game in a while. Edward doesn't like to play often despite his love of the game because his gift doesn't let us provide much of a challenge," Carlisle smiled, looking well pleased as he examined the finished game.

"Glad I could be of service," I smiled, giving a sweeping bow from where I sat.

"About time, now that you're done with that old man's game you can play some real ones with me," Emmett grinned, pointing his thumb over his shoulder in gesture to the TV.

"Old man's-" Carlisle reeled back, looking jokingly affronted. "Why I never!" He breathed, though the whole image was ruined by the small smile that tugged at his lips. Emmett only waved his hands dismissively.

"Yeah, yeah. C'mon, little sis, let's see how good you are at racing!" He said, laughing when I 'eeped' in surprise at being easily lifted up and carried to the couch with his one arm wrapped around my waist like a girl carrying a doll. Let's not tell him that though... Well, I couldn't say I was surprised to be playing Need For Speed: Underground and it was honestly frustrating to lose to Emmett, always being just seconds behind him in the races, my visions and previous experience playing video games no use against those damn vampire reflexes. It was still fun though and Jasper seemed to like the frustrated pout that resulted from my no win streak.

Rosalie pulled me away with an eye roll to look through fashion magazines and critique them after my twelfth consecutive loss, only for the both of us to be pulled into the kitchen by an enthusiastic Esme to make chocolate madeleines when my stomach gave the barest of rumbles around noon, one I barely even heard. Apparently she'd paid close attention to Jasper about my tastes and appetite and had bought quite a few baking ingredients for sweet snacks. By the time we were putting the madeleines in the oven, all three of us were laughing and chatting amiably about stereotypical things like boys and clothes, the laughing coming from Jasper's growls that came from the living room whenever I told my experiences with teenage boys who were far too forward with me and didn't get a hint or with older teens that were very sweet and thoughtful.

By the time we returned to the living room and I was sitting on Jasper's lap on the couch, nibbling on madeleines and passively watching TV with everyone, I realized that I had spent at least some amount of time with each member of the family...well except Edward but I wasn't about to lament that loss. Everyone seemed to casually drift off to do their own thing again as I ate through the madeleines, Carlisle and Esme heading to their studies, Rosalie going back to reading through magazines and Emmett going back to playing video games as soon as Jasper and I moved off the couch to return my empty plate to the kitchen.

I giggled when Jasper moved to hug me from behind as soon as I started to wash the plate myself, feeling his smile in my neck as he hummed contentedly like a large feline.

"You didn't have to wash it, you realize?" Jasper questioned. I scoffed as I finished washing it and turned off the sink, shaking it of the excess water.

"It's one plate, Jazz. It'd be kind of rude to just leave a single measly plate in the sink. It'd ruin the wonderful image of Esme's perfect kitchen if there was this one dirty plate in the sink!" I explained passionately as I dried it off with a towel and replaced it on the rack I saw Esme get it from, smiling when Jasper chuckled.

"Well, now that you're done, mind if I take you where I've wanted to since you got here?" He asked. I turned in his arms and twined my hands in his.

"Lead the way, Major Whitlock," I replied in mock seriousness, making him give that rakish smile that made my knees go weak. Oh gods, I wonder if I'll survive complete privacy with Jasper...


The run to our destination was honestly the most fun I'd experienced in a long while, way better than the roller coasters at Disneyland or Six Flags and Jasper made it a point to send me his pleased feelings at my enthusiasm when I had actually started to breathlessly laugh aloud into his shoulder where I had tucked my head. Gods, how on earth did Bella find this terrifying?... Ah, right, it stemmed from the fact that she couldn't even walk on a flat surface without hurting herself, roller coasters might as well be called 'death traps' in her vocabulary. Well, her loss, at least until she became a vampire herself.

"So, where are we going?" I finally allowed myself to ask when he slowed to a human walking pace and shifted me from his back into his arms, still not letting me down.

"Edward ain't the only one with his own private sanctuary," Jasper replied, gently putting me down and walking ahead to move aside some tall shrubbery and reveal a little slice of freaking Eden. I heard my own sharp intake of breath in the silence of the forest as I stepped forward into the clearing and took in the sight.

There was an absolutely breathtaking, picturesque scenery before me. It's what people imagined when they tried to picture where mythical creatures like faeries and unicorns hung out! The clearing was mostly flat and covered in vibrant green moss and soft ankle high grass with the occasional, random smatterings of pretty clumps of wildflowers. Off to the left side, curving along the edge of the clearing, was a shallow forest brook, burbling pleasantly and chorusing with the short, small waterfall it originated from, the forestry stopping to frame a short scraggly cliff face that was eaten into by a breathtaking willow tree with vibrant yellow moss growing atop the verdant foliage and making it seem like yellow flowers in bloom.

Moss covered stones of varying sizes were also interspersed around the clearing, three flat stones in a triangular position and connected by two equally moss covered naturally fallen tree trunks that looked like benches placed by nature itself. (There was a lot of moss, as expected of Forks really.)

"Jasper, this...this is- there aren't words adequate enough to describe how incredible this is!" I breathed in awe, understandably overwhelmed by the incredible beauty of it all.

"I might have cheated a little," he admitted. "I laid the groundwork for most of it the first time we moved here and finished it up when we came back this time." He gently led me by the hand to the base of the large willow tree, moving aside the curtain of foliage to expose the thick trunk...and the bed-nest of blankets and pillows at its base and among its roots.

"This is amazing, Jazz," I couldn't help whispering as I took his gestured invitation to sit in the welcoming nest after he had let the natural curtain of the willow close us into our own little world.

"I'd hoped you might like it," he said with that toe curling rakish grin as he sat down beside me, wrapping an arm around my waist as I laid back and leaned my head on his shoulder.

"Let's just say I'm glad you're an empath, otherwise my inability to verbally express my wonder and gratitude may have had you wondering if I hated it or was mentally impaired," I mused.

"I'd never think you were mentally impaired, besides, I've never actually witnessed you at a true loss for words since you always seem to have a response for anything," he teased.

"Is that so...?" I drawled casually, making him chuckle.

"Exactly," he said dryly, chuckling as I only snuggled into him further, a small smile curving my lips.

I'm sure if I had the ability to I would have been purring by now as I rest contentedly against him, enjoying the soft sounds of the forest, the natural symphony soon added to by the low, smooth baritone of Jasper's voice when he asked me a question.

"What was it like living with your mother in Phoenix?" He asked softly. It took me a while to register the question through the pleasant, drifting haze that had settled in my mind, but I got it eventually.

"Mn, well, I can't say Renée wasn't a loving mother because she was. She likes to dote on us and loves to cuddle us far too much even now and she spoils us with presents like sweets and clothes whenever she can...but she does have her flaws as a person that certainly became a part of the reason Bella and I are the way we are today. Renée, while she was loving and supportive and didn't leave us wanting for anything... she wasn't exactly very reliable when it came to matters not pertaining to emotions, like showing up at parent teacher meetings, signing off on permission slips, getting project materials we needed, carpools, organizing parties, daily household chores, etcetera, etcetera. Thanks to that, Bella and I learned to be self sufficient from a very young age, learning to cook and clean, learning to manage our time wisely, to take into our own hands the duty of making sure things are signed or bought. We even learned how to balance a checkbook before we even got into high school."

"She sounds..." Jasper trailed off, unsure what to say.

"Air-headed? Scatter-brained? Flaky?" I offered him dryly, amused. Jasper only nodded hesitantly. "She is, but as bad as she can be with things like school and chores, her spontaneity and love of life seem to more than make up for it at times. She took us to fun places all the time like amusement parks, fairs, carnivals, flea markets, and shopping centers and constantly surprised us by signing us up for things like arts and crafts, dancing, acting, singing, and martial arts lessons, whatever had caught her interest at the time. They didn't last very long because she lost interest and/or Bella ended up hurting herself or someone else, but Renée was happy when I showed an interest in some of the classes and asked to keep attending for longer...at least until Bella put her foot down and reminded us that extra lessons for anything were not in the budget."

"Sounds like you had an interesting childhood," he smiled, his thumb tracing calming circles on my hip.

"It was really fun, but I'm afraid it's the reason that Bella's so self isolating. Thanks to her natural clumsiness and Renée's constant need to go out and have fun, things that should be correlated with fun like parties and dancing and learning to do more hands on things equals disaster waiting to happen and misery. Bella has always been a solemn, serious girl even when she was a brat so when kids laughed at her clumsiness, even if it wasn't meant to be mean or teasing, she took it personally and was hurt so she started pulling away from others and focused on her studies. As she grew, she realized that thanks to Renée and her own developed inclination to be focused and prepared that she was too mature and disconnected from her own age group and gender to get along with her peers and too uncertain and socially awkward to get along with real adults as Renée acts more like a child in an adult's body than anything. Of course she did get some unpleasant habits from Renée, more than she probably realizes, and with less restraint since she's not as social, like her curiosity which is honestly more trouble than not, her inclination to think of only her feelings and opinions on things like her well being, and deciding things on her own in relation to important matters and discussions, all without even realizing that she's doing something wrong."

"Mn," he hummed thoughtfully, his hand raising to softly pet at my hair. "And you? How did this all shape you?" I was quiet as I thought through my answer thoroughly before speaking, placing a hand over the one he had on my hip, mindlessly stroking the back of it with my fingers.

"I think," I started slowly, "that my gift, my visions, played a great role in shaping me to be who I am today," I finished softly. "I'd always been more mature than others my age, like Bella, it came with being raised by Renee, but my visions provided me with experiences that, I suppose, aged me beyond my years. Thanks to my gift, I was able to see the consequences of all my actions, of Bella's actions, of Renee's, and, being who I am, rather than give up on what I want if those consequences were negative, I instead started to find ways to manipulate the end result to get what I wanted anyway. I'm not saying it's the wisest or most noble thing, far from it, but I kind of realized from a young age that people generally tend to act on their own desires whether for their own benefit, the benefit of a cause they believe in, or the benefit of their loved ones, they still act on them so I saw no reason to hold back on my own when no one but me would take them into full consideration. I'm a selfish creature and see no reason to deny myself what I want if I can have it without causing any harm," I sniffed, causing Jasper to chuckle at me.

"Still sounds like you're a good person to me, only taking what you want as long as no one gets hurt," he commented, smiling into my neck as he brushed featherlight, ghosting kisses on my neck, allowing him more access by tilting my head back more comfortably onto his shoulder.

"It's not like I do it out of the goodness of my heart," I muttered, mildly embarrassed at being called a good person, so used to referring to myself as (understandably) arrogant and selfish. "I just really don't do well with drama. Getting what I want is kind of spoiled if someone else isn't happy and throws a hissy fit. They bum me out and totally ruin my sense of satisfaction and victory," I pouted playfully.

"Of course they did," he chuckled. "So, growing up with Renée and Bella was a bit less stressful for you than for Bella?" He asked.

"A bit, I suppose, but it was stressful in different ways...well, exasperating is more like it. Most of the visions I've had in my childhood honestly mostly involved Bella getting hurt in some way, shape, or form and spending extended periods of time with Renée can be exhausting for a natural introvert like Bella and I, though I am admittedly more outgoing than Bella, if only by comparison to each other," I confessed.

"How were you more outgoing?" Jasper asked, curiosity lacing his tone.

"Well, I actually enjoyed some of Renee's random outings for one. For another, I actually went to each and every school function, from in school events like obstacle courses and awareness programs like Challenge Day to all the school dances we ever had," I answered, smiling at the fun memories I had accumulated.

"...Dances?" Jasper asked softly after a short pause.

"Yeah, I even went to senior only dances and proms than were held at night clubs or hotel halls rather than the school gym because I went with older dates," I mused.

"Dates," Jasper stated flatly, "I heard you speaking about them with Rosalie and Esme in the kitchen. You had a different date for every dance, only ever going with them as friends, and then setting them up with other girls soon after," he repeated, trailing off a bit as his arms wrapped a bit more securely around my waist.

"Yes, Jazz, I was quite aware you were listening, judging from all the growling you were doing," I snickered when another low, playful growl was his response.

"And you still have most of their numbers?" He more stated than questioned, but I answered him anyways, smiling at the hint of possessiveness in his voice.

"Yeah, they like to ask me for relationship advice a lot, but some of them end up losing contact with me because it makes their girlfriends uneasy, which is understandable." I lifted my head a bit to nuzzle my cheek against his. "They'd totally understand if I said I was deleting their numbers because I'm in a relationship now," I offered easily. "It's not like I'm really vested in the tentative friendships I have with them."

"But you like them askin' you for help and offerin' them advice. It's fine, Maddy, just admit ya like helpin' people," he teased.

"No!" I said stubbornly, "I refuse!" My act was broken by a smile forcing it's way to my mouth at Jasper's obvious amusement.

"I am curious 'bout one thing, though," he started off casually.

"And what's that?" I returned, interested.

"I know you went to dances with your dates as just friends, but what about other relationships? Any, ah, exes?" I laughed at that.

"Do you want to know their names so you can hunt them down?" Another playful growl rumbled from his chest and I let out a breathless giggle when he gently nipped at my ear. "No, Jazz, no boyfriends. The closest I've gotten are those dates and that only involved some handholding and innocent kisses-"

"Kisses?" Jasper repeated in a low, dark tone.

"-on the cheek," I finished as if uninterupted, my lips tilting up into an amused smirk that turned a bit vicious at my next words. "Certain...accidents have happened to anyone who's tried to get a bit too fresh with me."

"Oh?" Jasper's interest was clear in his lighter tone. "Accidents, you say? And you had absolutely nothing to do with it, I suppose," he said dryly, his bland look ruined by the amusement clear in his amber eyes and slight upwards quirk of his perfect lips.

"Why, I never, Jasper!" I gasped in false innocence, dramatically affronted. "How could you insinuate such a thing! Just because that one boy is still in the hospital after tragically tumbling down three flights of stairs-"

"Three flights?" Jasper again repeated, this time incredulous.

"-three flights of stairs, doesn't mean I had anything to do with it." I finished primly. "It was just coincidence that he was in the exact place Bella was supposed to be in, ccoincidence that Bella was nowhere in the vicinity, and coincidence that I happened to be near him when the unfortunate event occured."

Jasper only looked at me in silent awe and admiration. "You're absolutely diabolical," he breathed in blatant respect.

"Thank you," I preened, chest puffing a bit at the praise.

"I love that about you," he purred, literally purred, into my ear. I froze at the words immediately.

"You...love me?" I whispered in mild shock and disbelief. Sure, Jasper and I were openly affectionate with each other and our feelings for each other weren't exactly in question by either of us thanks to our respective gifts, but we had never...vocally spoken the label of our feelings for the other, and to hear it slip so casually from those tempting lips, to have it spoken like a caress to my skin, stole all the breath I had in me, my insides quivering madly like a frenzy of hyper butterflies.

"Yes," Jasper murmured back easily in reply, "very much so," he finished, his tone softer, sweeter than before as he shifted so I was sitting sideways on his lap. I easily adjusted, my breath hitching at the reply and giving a cross between a huff and a breathless laugh as I wrapped my arms around his neck and hid my warmed face in his neck.

"...do you feel that or do I have to say it?" I whispered with barely any volume, embarrassed and overwhelmed with the intensity of the feelings his words had brought coursing through me, my body instinctively curling up in my subconscious attempt to hide myself.

"Oh, I can feel it," Jasper replied with just as much volume, pulling me closer to him, "but it'd be nice to hear you say it," he murmured into my hair.

"Mn..." my eyes squeezed shut as I buried my face further in the crook of his neck and struggled to keep my breathing more or less even. After a few ragged breaths, I let out a shuddering sigh and sagged against him in defeat. "I love you."

The phrase spoken shakily, clumsily, strained, and with barely any sound, having taken much effort for me to say with such utter sincerity, exposing the raw emotion behind the words to him, had left my heart pounding wildly after they left my tongue, but had a weight I hadn't realized I even had before lift up off my shoulders and a feeling of giddy lightness take its place (I'm sure I'll feel properly disgusted later at how sappy I was currently being). His gift and mine had acted as a safety net of sorts for me that allowed me to show Jasper my affection solely through my actions and playful words without concern of him eventually thinking that I didn't like him as much as he did me or that I didn't take our relationship seriously because of my lack of sincerely spoken, affectionate phrases. Obviously Jasper was perfect for me.

Jasper's own shuddering breath, coming out in a guttural half moan, half purr/growl, pulled me back to the present as my recently declared love (at least verbally) suddenly, easily shifted me so I was straddling him, chest to chest with no space between us as he pressed me tightly to his marble, Adonis body, wrapping me in a cool, stone embrace.

"Darlin', maybe ya shouldn't say that aloud too often," he chuckled breathlessly, one hand gracefully sliding up from where he had gripped my thigh to slowly crawl up the side of my body, " 'cause hearing those words from you is almost too much for my heart to take."

[○\\○]

Nimble fingers teased the skin at the bunched hem of my short dress before moving over my clothed torso until he had ghosted over the swell of my breasts to rest his hand in the small space between my shoulder blades, the other hand sliding from my neck to its nape and up until his fingers were twined in my short hair and the back of my head cupped perfectly in his palm. I put up no resistance when he guided my lips to meet his, one of my own hands firmly tangled in his own hair and the other relishing in the feel of the rippling muscles I could feel in his shoulder from every small shift he made.

"Mn," a small sound escaped me as I arched my back into the featherlight patterns his cool fingers drew on my spine, my desires growing more unrestrained thanks to there being no immediate obstacles around like there usually are, no Charlie or Bella in the other rooms, no possibility of students happening upon us in our cars, no vampire family to overhear anything intimate. We were, for once, well and truly alone together, as alone as we could be, have ever been, together. And didn't that just make my blood heat pleasantly under my skin.

It seemed Jasper also picked up on it as he gave a far more wild growl in comparison to the playful ones before as the hand on my back slid back to my naked thigh, moving up to slip under my dress and cup my ass, his sudden squeeze making me gasp and surge my hips forward only to meet his own and morph my gasp to a needy moan as his surprisingly cool, hard member met with my own tingling womanhood.

Our kiss got more sloppy as I repeated the motion, rocking my hips and pressing down against his impressive length, relishing in the amazing contrast of our temperatures, the cold permeating through his clothes making my heated snatch pulse and tingle as much as the deep throated growl that my actions dragged from his lips as I sucked and nibbled at them.

"Maddy," he choked, the hand from my neck disappearing, soon followed by the curious sound of bark snapping and crackling, muffled by the sound of tearing cloth, as he slowly, painstakingly brought his hips up to match my pace.

"Gods, Jasper!" Fuck, the sound of him so easily destroying a thick tree root with one hand and groping my ass with the other turned me on way more than I expected, my hips snapping forward much faster than before in my excitement and making Jasper let out a long hiss through gritted teeth as his own hips snapped forth much rougher than, I think, either of us expected. "Oh fuck! I think I like it rough Jazz!" I nearly sobbed in confession as the hard thrust had me lose the little rhythm I had, opting for quick, harsh grinding in my attempts to get the same friction, my head lifting up to the tree's canopy, eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to stop them from popping out from too wide open lids.

Jasper only groaned, the sound followed by more crushed bark, and torn fabric as he pressed a cool forehead on my heaving chest, his free hand moving to press against my swollen clit through damp panties as he followed my harsh grinds with his own hard, fast thrusts, doing an excellent job of driving me to my peak too soon with that magical, practically vibrating thumb of his.

"Fuck, Jasper!" I cried with no volume, my thighs clamping at his waist and my arms clamping so hard around his head, smothering his face in my chest, that I was sure I would most likely bruise. Not that I cared, I was still shuddering every so often and riding the aftermath of my embarrassingly fast release. I sagged against him, my arms falling limp around his neck as I took deep breaths to calm my racing heart.

(=\\=)

"Sooooo much better than toys," I moaned in pleasure, still breathy and high from my first orgasm at the, very talented, hands of a male. He only gave a startled, short laugh of amusement.

"I don't know how to feel about ya cussin' like that in the heat of the moment," Jasper started, sounding strained as he shook his hand of wood splinters and bits of cotton to stroke at the slightly damp hair of my neck, "it does bad things to my self control," he chuckled weakly, his other hand softly roaming the contours of my body through my dress, thumbing almost shyly at the swell of my breasts, feeling the outline of my lacy bra.

"Well, I for one love your self control," I sighed in pleased satisfaction, nuzzling against his neck as he chuckled with a little more volume than before, relishing his slow wandering hands. I knew he didn't have the luxury of touching me during our heated moment, realizing he was more likely to hurt me than pleasure me. It was a good thing I seemed to like it rough then, but it still meant he had to keep a tight lid on his actions, just a smidgen less. Gods, if this was just a small taste of the future, I couldn't wait to be a vampire.

"It's gettin' dark, darlin'. I should get ya home," he murmured, kissing the crown of my head. I let out a petulant, little murmur of complaint just before my traitorous stomach let out a near inaudible growl like it did earlier in the afternoon, making Jasper chuckle in amusement as he shifted me a bit further away from him in his lap, sitting up straighter and crossing his legs. "See, you need to go home and eat dinner. Come on, the run back is gonna be chilly."

"Damned amazing vampire senses, stupid necessary human functions," I muttered in irritation as I allowed Jasper to shift me and pick me up bridal style in his arms, not even bothering to try getting up on my own. I doubt I could walk well right now anyway with my legs feeling a bit too much like jelly at the moment.

Jasper only shushed me and lifted my mood by giving me a soft kiss, or two, or three. Damn boyfriend who knew how to cheer me up so well.


AN: Finally, finally finished this. First time I've consciously self appointed a deadline...and failed (this was supposed to be published on Halloween) but at least two days late isn't too bad. Well, here it is! Hope it's not too bad (=u=)'.

Also, decided to try something, and idea I got from my friend/editor/muse while talking about Maddy. I would be open and happy to answer any questions or comments given in reviews directed to Maddy or anyone in their POV, as if they were the ones answering themselves. It'd be fun, it'd help me think in their perspective more easily for the story, and it'd help motivate me to keep writing, so please don't hesitate!

I will put your question and the character's answer before or after the story(after the disclaimer or in my AN, you could say your preference too and I'll take it into account), but please don't be offended or mad if I don't get to your question or comment, I'll most likely only want to put one or two answers before the story and at most five in the author's note so please keep that in mind if I don't answer it. As it is, I don't actually know if people will actually go for it yet so we'll see.

As always, thanks for reading and reviews are forever welcome(=u=)