Warning: Angsty...


Agents Cho and Van Pelt sat there waiting impatiently for their return. "We ready to leave now, Boss?" Cho asked. "LaRoche is very close to the end of his tether. He's been trying to call you several times, but since your phone's down here he couldn't reach you. I've called him and informed him, you had an important matter to attend to and he said and that's a quote, 'I won't be sitting out here all day, crammed in my car, waiting until those two are finished humping like a pair of lovesick rabbits'."

"Cho!" Van Pelt exclaimed with indignation.

"His words, not mine," the Asian man replied stoically.

"Well, we did have a quickie, but that wasn't the real reason we needed some privacy," Jane informed them merrily, earning himself a death glare from his girlfriend.

Cho shrugged unimpressed and Van Pelt blushed a bit, obviously not really comfortable with Jane's openness. "Sorry, Grace. I didn't mean to cause you discomfort. But in all honesty, I'm quite sure we all know what a romantic relationship between two consenting adults usually entails."

Lisbon cast him a warning glance but didn't seem overly mad at him which encouraged him to continue. "And as we're forced into living in close quarters right now, I'd say it's best not to make things even more awkward by ignoring the pink elephant in the room."

Though both Cho and Van Pelt didn't look entirely at ease yet, their nods indicated that no one would be dying from shame any time soon, and so Jane went on, "I know, I wasn't very discreet last night and I apologize for it. I had a rather emotionally taxing day and I lost control for a while. It was very unprofessional and I promise, I'll try not to repeat it. And now I hope we don't have to discuss this subject again because though I might appear all cool and collected the humiliation is about to kill me."

This succeeded to lighten everyone's mood and even Cho couldn't quite quell a chuckle. Lisbon gazed at her lover with affection and pride. She really admired his ability to handle awkward situations. In one go he'd actually accomplished to both apologize (though she didn't think he really had anything to apologize for), put the others at ease, had made it clear he wasn't ashamed of their active sex life, and had even voluntarily put himself in the position to bear the complete brunt of any lingering embarrassment just to make sure that the attention would be deflected from her own involvement.

She knew why she loved him so much. He was a genius. A beautiful, cute, thoughtful, kind, sexy genius. And he was all hers. Which brought her inevitably back to another touchy subject they'd have to talk about with everyone…


"I'll call LaRoche and ask him to come inside for a bit. There's something we've decided you should know about, though it isn't connected to Red John," Lisbon explained. She got her cell phone from the table and had a short conversation with the overweight agent outside. Two minutes later he knocked on the door and was let in.

"What's all this fuss about important information? And are we soon ready to get to the CBI? We have jobs there if I may remind you. It's already close to nine. I've been waiting for ages now. So this better be good," the bald man ranted upon entering.

"Hold your horses, J. J. All in due time. And for your information: we're not late for the reasons your dirty mind has come up with," Patrick teased him with a grin.

"Your girlfriend's blush tells another story, Jane," LaRoche teased right back with a wink. He hadn't really been mad, just slightly disgruntled because of the long wait in the car. But astonishingly enough something that only a few days earlier would've grated on his nerves – namely the consultant's audacity – now put him in a good mood. They'd found out they shared a similar sense of humor and after getting to know the other man as something like a friend he truly liked him and appreciated his wit. "And please quit stalling now. I want to know what's going on," he requested.

Lisbon decided to take over. It was her job as the leader anyway and the whole matter was probably even harder to talk about for Jane. She looked at the nervous, but curious faces of her two agents and the demanding expression on LaRoche's and opted to get straight to the point. "We have a bit of a situation involving Madeleine Hightower. As we work and live together very closely at the moment and I want as little distraction as possible from our real Red John problems, it seems best to address this head on."

She took a deep breath, all eyes were on her. "Madeleine doesn't know I'm sharing this with you and I can tell you right away, she won't like it a bit. But I can't with good conscience put her need for privacy over our current operation. And I want this whole mess to interfere as little as possible with our work. That it will anyway at least to a certain degree is probably unavoidable. You all being in the know will hopefully minimize the tension or so I hope. At least in the long run. It might be very awkward to begin with."

She paused again and took in the inquisitive looks pointed in her direction. "Sorry. I guess, I'm not that good at getting straight to the point here. It's just, well, I hope and ask for your understanding and discretion. This is a delicate matter and what we need is for you to act as normal as possible. That's why I'm telling you, so you won't just sense something and make it worse because of your ignorance."

"Love, you're rambling," Jane pointed out to her warmly. "I know it's a difficult subject, but I think you're about to kill'em with the suspense. I… mhm, I could take over if you want me to," he offered hesitantly.

"No, no. Sorry. You're right. I am rambling. Okay, on to the real matter: this morning Madeleine confided to me that she has developed strong feelings for Patrick. Obviously she's harbored some kind of attraction for him all along but it's turned into quite a bit more since, well, since she encountered some other aspects of his personality and, well-," she looked a bit sheepish and had to clear her throat, "-his physique."

"His physique?" Cho asked with raised brows. "That's about the last thing I'd have expected her to fall for. What's supposed to be special about our resident couch potato?"

"Hey!" Jane complained. "I might not be a beef-cake like you, Cho, but I'll have you know that I don't maintain an entirely sedentary lifestyle either."

Lisbon sighed, shared a look and eye roll with Van Pelt and muttered, "Menfolk!" That got their attention. "Can we please focus on the matter at hand instead of your chest-thumping?"

Both looked sufficiently contrite in her opinion and their sheepish nods made her grin. "And Cho? Let me assure you of one thing: there's absolutely nothing wrong with Madeleine's taste in men. And there's a lot to be said about the hiding powers of three-piece-suits."

"I'll believe that when I see it," Cho murmured.

"Well, I won't strip for you, Kimball," Jane replied, feigning indignation. "Not anytime soon anyway. I'm not that easy. You haven't even taken me out on a date yet."

Lisbon rolled her eyes again. "Boys, please! Cho stop doubting my words, I'm your boss and hence I know best. Patrick, stop provoking him or you'll find your fine physique lonely on the couch tonight."

"So, Hightower has really fallen in love with Jane?" Van Pelt chimed in, attempting to get back to the original topic of the conversation.

"I'm afraid so," Lisbon answered. "She's completely beside herself as you can imagine. She had a hard time telling me. She asked me to inform Patrick and it will be even harder for her to face him now, I'd say."

The others looked very understanding and Lisbon went on, "Well, Patrick and I talked it through and we agreed that it would be best to confront the whole thing head on. They can't avoid each other at the moment, so it's best to deal with it as directly as possible. It'll hurt her pride but that might just do the trick and get her back on track. Any opinions anyone?"

"The poor woman," Grace said quietly, sympathy shining from her eyes. "Unrequited feelings are just horrible and then having them - of all people - for someone as biting as Jane. But I think you're right about dealing with it like that. It's at least better than letting Jane have a go at her with his evil mouth, though it would probably cure her immediately."

Patrick looked a bit offended but forced himself to stay calm. "Why, thanks Grace. I hope you know, I wouldn't do that to her. It would only hurt her more. I know, I often play with others' feelings, but I'm not a totally heartless bastard, okay?"

"Sorry, Jane. I didn't mean it like that. But you do have a habit of mauling people with your sharp tongue, especially when something they do offends you or hits too close to home," the young woman explained apologetically.

"Yeah, whatever," the blond man replied moodily. Sometimes it shocked him how people interpreted his behavior. He had to admit that Van Pelt was partly right with her observations. But he tried to reserve his verbal attacks for people he thought deserved it and refrained from really and willingly hurting people close to him or those who he deemed vulnerable.

Yes, he enjoyed messing with women who were gullible enough to fall all over him for his superficial charm, but he could honestly say that he'd never made fun of someone who'd had true feelings for him – not that it had happened that often anyway. By his estimation Hightower was in fact only the third one after all. Or maybe he was less observant than he liked to think and had simply not noticed the other hundreds of ladies he'd supposedly enamored and then cut to pieces, which he found rather unlikely.

"It's very enlightening to finally learn the truth about my colleagues' assessment of my person. Cho thinks I'm a lazy lardass and Van Pelt sees me as a cruel jerk. I feel truly appreciated," he added sarcastically a moment later.

Cho snorted and threw him an exasperated look, but Van Pelt blushed deeply and seemed flustered and sorry. LaRoche, who'd kept his silence so far, spoke up when he felt the tension becoming too much, "Come on, Patrick. I'm sure you're aware of the fact that you offend people on a regular basis. The about 500 complaints the CBI receives about you each year aren't exactly conveying the picture of an accommodating and docile personality. So stop accusing your teammates of making unfounded accusations."

Jane flashed him an angry glance. "I don't deny that I like poking fun at self-important wannabee celebreties. We happen to be called mostly to cases where people know people who are related to someone somewhat important. And they often act as if their losses and concerns are more valid or fundamental than those of so called normal people." He snorted. "I hate such behavior, and it's exactly that kind of people who feel the need to write a complaint because they assume, it makes them appear even more important when in fact all it does is making them look petty. And yes, I have no problem offending them and I'll certainly continue to do so."

He cleared his throat. "I even admit that I might have a bit of a problem with people in a position of power, especially when they use said position to control others, or in a worst case scenario: me. But I disclaim attacking people just for the fun of it and completely without a reason other than hurting them. I might tease and I might banter. But I do know which lines to cross and what's totally off limits," he continued to defend himself. "At least I hope so. But obviously it's not the case if people assume, I'd sink low enough to humiliate someone for their misplaced feelings, especially when they pertain to myself. I'm honestly shocked you wouldn't put it past me to do something like that. Seems like I'm much more of a jerk than I was aware of."

"God, Jane, I'm sorry! I really didn't mean it like that," Van Pelt exclaimed.

The blond man shook his head. "No, Grace. You meant it exactly like that and it's your right to say so when you perceive my actions that way. It's probably a good thing to get a reality check once in a while. Can't say that I like it but that's not the point either. I know my sense of humor isn't appreciated by everyone and I'll try to work on it."

He got up from the armchair he'd been occupying and made an inviting hand gesture. "You coming or what? I've been told we have work to do at the office. Or maybe if we're really lucky we'll catch another case. I feel a sudden urge to mortally offend a senator's third cousin twice removed," he said, sarcasm dripping from every word. "Oh, and just to be on the safe side: that was supposed to be funny."

Lisbon stepped over to him with a grim face. "Can't say it was, Jane." Her iron grip on his arm prevented him from leaving the room. "Stop this nonsense at once," she hissed. "'I understand that Van Pelt's words hurt you, but right now you're actually proving her point. Nobody here is out to get you, so stop reacting like you're under a hostile attack."

"Could you please unhand me, Lisbon? I don't particularly appreciate your tendency to use physical force against my person. You could've just asked me to stay," Jane said reproachfully.

"As if you'd listen," Lisbon huffed. "And while we're at it: just because the behavior of certain people annoys you, doesn't automatically give you the right to insult them. Not to mention that it's usually ME who has to wipe off YOUR messes. I'd really appreciate it if you could buck up once in a while and refrain from offending people left and right."

Jane removed her hand from his arm emphatically and glared at her. "I've told you so before, but you obviously didn't deem it important enough to remember: I'm not nor will I ever be your lapdog, Agent Lisbon. You can either take it or leave it." He reigned in his features after that and put on a mask of nonchalance that didn't suit his next words at all. "And now I'm out of here before I say something I might regret or even worse: that my loved ones could construe as mental cruelty against them. I need some space. See you later."


He left the room with resolute steps and Cho had to run to reach him in time to stop him from getting out of the house. He blocked his access to the open front door with his body at the last moment and held him back with his arms as well. "Jane, cut it out. Stop it or I'll force you to."

"Leave me the hell alone, Cho! Take your hands off me or I swear I'll…", he hissed.

"Or you'll what?" the other man interrupted him, mien disimpassioned as usual, but he lowered his arms to give Jane some space.


This turned out to be a mistake and a fateful miscalculation, because in an act completely alien to the consultant's normal modus operandi he suddenly gave his teammate such a forceful shove that it pushed him right out of the door and onto his butt. With the doorway now clear the blond man left the house in a hurry.

But the others had followed them into the hall and were close by. Lisbon was too shocked to react, but Van Pelt didn't hesitate. She went after their consultant and tackled him to the ground in the front yard. He struggled vehemently. Fortunately Cho regained his footing fast and went to help her. It took both their combined power and training to finally subdue him. He fought them tooth and nail for several minutes. In the end he bowed to their superiority and turned to begging them to let him go. They could have managed to restrain him faster using more force but the last thing they'd wanted to do was to hurt their friend.

When he gave up his struggle at last his body was shaking with gut-wrenching sobs. Lisbon was by his side in a matter of seconds. She knelt down and asked her two agents to let him go. Jane curled up into a fetal position immediately and hid his head behind his arms in a gesture of self-protection. Carefully her hand went to his neck in an attempt to comfort him but he flinched violently. "Please don't hurt me, I'll be good," he repeated over and over again like a mantra, barely understandable due to the sobs disrupting his speech.

The others shuddered at the thought of what his reaction obviously implied. That both his jacket, vest, and shirt had been ridden up during the struggle which had revealed his lower back to them for the first time ever, a back marred by distinct scars, only reinforced what they all had started to suspect ever since Alex Jane had entered the picture.

"Sh, Patrick. It's alright. No one's gonna hurt you, love. Everything's gonna be alright, Patrick. I have you, you're safe here," Teresa whispered in a tone meant to be calming, and step by little step some of the tension seemed to leave her boyfriend's body. She dared to make another attempt at touching him and this time he only recoiled a little and allowed her to play with the curls at his neck a moment later.

"Do you hear me, Patrick?" she asked gently and received a small nod. "Could we maybe move this back inside, love?" He nodded again but didn't stir otherwise. She took a hold of one of his hands and when he didn't protest she took that as a good sign and caressed the back of it with her thumb.

If she was really honest she had expected a breakdown of some kind any time soon and it didn't surprise her at all that it had happened now. In hindsight she cursed herself for pushing him earlier. She should've known that any additional pressure could turn out to be the infamous straw that broke the camel's back. All the events of the last days and now the whole Hightower fiasco on top of it had finally caught up with him. The misunderstanding with Van Pelt had only provided the icing on the cake. On a normal day he'd have taken that unfortunate wording in stride but at this point the notion that his chosen family regarded him as a cruel bastard had simply been too much for him to bear.

He wasn't sobbing anymore and the shaking had subsided almost completely as well. What he needed now was some peace and quiet and probably some TLC – nothing to be found in a front yard.


Quietly she addressed her second in command, "Cho, could you give me a hand and help me get him inside?"

The Asian man nodded and very slowly he stepped closer, treading warily so as not to frighten the man still doubled up on the ground. He knelt down beside him. "Will you let me help you up, Patrick?" he asked in a gentle voice no one present had ever heard from him before.

He was rewarded by another small nod. Then Jane's body started to relax as he gave up the protective position he'd been in. The consultant tried to hide his face but Cho still caught a glimpse of the raw pain and fear visible on it. The sight touched him deeply and it was the defining moment in which the agent truly realized how fragile the strong man was underneath all his masks and how much he really cared for the guy.

With slow movements as if he was dealing with a scared animal he offered Jane his hand and pulled him into a sitting position. When he was sure the other man was alright with it, he put an arm around his waist and with Lisbon's help they got him to his feet. On slightly unsteady legs he let himself be led back into the house. They aided him up the stairs and into the guest room where he stumbled over to the bed on his own steam. Lisbon stepped out into the hall again with her second in command and shut the door behind them to talk without her boyfriend hearing them.

"Cho? You and Van Pelt go to work with LaRoche. You're in charge as acting supervisor. I'm taking some personal time as does our consultant. Ask J. J. to leave a security detail in front of the house. I'll call you later. Inform me only if it's something really important or urgent. I trust you to know what that includes," Lisbon ordered.

"Yes, boss." Gesturing with his head to indicate the man inside the room he asked with worry, "Will he be okay, Teresa?"

"Eventually. At least I hope so." She sighed heavily. "I've suspected something like this would happen one of these days." Her eyes showed worry and sadness and she fought tears. "I mean, this whole situation would overstrain anyone and we all know he wasn't the most stable even before shock after personal shock was added to the mix." Eyeing her agent warily she asked tentatively, "You won't think any less of him for this, will you?" A tear escaped her eye.

Without further ado Cho pulled the petite woman into a hug. "Of course not, Teresa. How could I? He's probably the strongest person I know. I respect him and he's family."

He released her because he knew his boss well enough to understand that this was as far as she would get to allow a show of what she'd view as a moment of weakness. In an attempt to lighten the dire mood a little he added, "Well, at least I got genuine proof that the guy actually has some real muscle. Boy, did he put up a fight! I'll certainly never doubt his strength again."

A small smile appeared on her face and her eyes showed warmth and tenderness. "Yeah, he's strong all over and a real fighter and he'll be okay. You better leave now and I'll take care of him."

"Will do." The agent turned and went down the steps.


Downstairs Cho was met by the worried faces of Van Pelt and LaRoche. He forwarded Lisbon's orders and they left the house. J. J. cleared things with the security detail outside and then the three agents got inside one of the SUVs – the two younger ones in the front seats, LaRoche in the back, where he spent the whole trip organizing things via his phone. It gave the other two time for a talk.

"I really didn't mean to say that Jane's a heartless bastard," Van Pelt said meekly to her teammate when they were on the road. "It's just that sometimes he gets really offensive when things turn too personal for his taste."

"We all know that, Grace," Cho replied from his position in the driver's seat. "Don't feel guilty. With all the shit that's happened to him it just needed a small thing to finally send him over the edge. Everybody has a breaking point. I guess we just witnessed Patrick Jane's at long last."

He cast her a sideways glance and she nodded but spoke up again, "I still feel kind of bad about it. It was a stupid, thoughtless remark and I should've known it was bad timing. I was just so worried that he would torment Hightower with it. I mean, he has teased me and Wayne mercilessly about our, well, you know."

"Yeah, do I ever," Cho answered with a somewhat pained expression. "And I've done so as well because you two almost begged for it with your stupidity. But has Jane ever made fun of you over O'Laughlin? Or whenever you were really upset about something? Think about it."

The redhead looked ashamed. "You're right. He's never done such a thing. He's actually been kind of nice about it. Tried to offer comfort and advice." She groaned. "Shit! I really screwed that up."

Cho sighed. "Yeah, maybe. But beating yourself up isn't going to help anyone. Let's look forward and see how we can be supportive. What he needs the most is people who care about him."

"Please don't get me wrong, but you're really surprising me today, Cho. I've never seen you so open," Van Pelt stated.

"These are special circumstances. And Jane's family," was his curt answer.


They spent a few minutes in silence, but finally Grace broke it again. "Did you see his back?"

"Yep," Cho replied.

"You think, it was his father who did it?" she asked tentatively.

"Probably."

"It looked really bad."

"Yeah."

"He thought, we would hurt him."

"Not really. He had some kind of flashback because we held him down."

She sighed, but a little grin crawled up to her lips. "He put up quite the fight. Didn't know, he had it in him. Guess you were wrong and he really isn't that much of a couch-potato after all."

Cho snorted. "Never thought so. I just teased him. I've actually seen him at the gym once. He's in a pretty good shape."

Van Pelt snickered. "Really?"

"Yep. You better close your eyes should you ever encounter him in anything but his usual attire. I sure as hell don't feel like dealing with yet another besotted female."

"Wow, that's high praise coming from you. He's that sightly?"

"Sorry, Grace, but I wouldn't know how to answer that. I'm not batting for the other team," he answered with a smirk. "But you can always ask the boss."

"Geez, Cho, what a suggestion. She'd have my head. She's pretty possessive."

"And probably biased," her teammate provided. "Out of curiosity: ever had a crush on him?"

She blushed.

"Ah. No need to answer that."

"Only in the beginning. For about five minutes. Before he opened his mouth," she defended herself.

He snorted.

"Well, it's the truth. Besides, he is an attractive man, even you have to admit that. And sometimes he can be incredible nice and charming as well and I'm a red-blooded woman. So there," she said defiantly.

He snorted again.

"Okay, I confess that I still find him somewhat appealing, but he's become something like a big brother to me and I certainly don't have any romantic feelings for him. That would be just, well, urgh," she explained and made a face.

"I certainly agree with the urgh-part."

Van Pelt turned serious again. "He's had a pretty shitty life so far. I'm glad he has Lisbon now. I was a bit uncomfortable with the thought of them together at first but now I think they're perfect for each other. He deserves to have some happiness again in his life."

"Yeah."

"I mean, no mother, an abusive father, wife and child murdered by a psychopathic serial killer who happens to be his mother's half-brother who resents and torments him amongst others because his beloved sister was killed during childbirth. That's really a terrible hand he's been dealt."

"Yep."

"I'm glad, we're his family now. I mean, he can be abrasive and difficult and he causes a lot of trouble but he's also making things interesting and fun. He can be really kind, too. And he's incredibly smart. I've learnt tons from him. And underneath it all he's a good man. Not necessarily always a nice one, but certainly a good one."

"Sure."

"I guess, you've already used up your daily quota of polysyllabic sentences," she teased him.

"Yes."

She chuckled and he grinned. "Well, forunately for me we've arrived. Thanks for the nice talk anyway," she replied merrily and opened the door to get out.

"Anytime."


Teresa went back into the room she'd been sharing with Patrick. He lay curled up on the bed facing the door, not as tightly wound-up as previously but the need to protect himself still seemed to be strong. She sat beside him on the edge of the bed and tousled his hair with one hand.

"Are you okay, Patrick?"

"Not really," he replied meekly. He reached out with his hand in search for hers and she met him, intertwining their fingers.

"Do you want some time alone?" she inquired gently.

He shook his head and looked up at her. "I need you. Please don't leave me," he said with a pleading tone.

"Of course not, love. Just tell me what you need," she reassured him.

"Could you maybe lay down with me and hold me?" he asked hopefully.

"Yes. But I have to make a phone call first."

"I'm sorry I've caused such a mess. You should be at work and I'm keeping you. You know, you can go. Job's important after all." He tried to sound convincing but failed completely.

She bent down and pecked his cheek. "Don't be ridiculous, Patrick. You are a lot more important than sitting in an office filling out forms. We're both taking some personal time today. We've more than earned it." She kissed him again. "You'll always be my first priority, imp. Never doubt that. There's no place I'd rather be than by your side."

A small, contented smile formed on his lips. "Wow, Teresa. That was really sappy. Didn't know you had it in you," he teased her, but she could see clearly that this was his way of masking the overwhelming relief he felt at her declaration. She knew, he still often doubted his own worth and the meltdown he'd just been through put him into an even more vulnerable state.

She smiled at him and caressed his cheek. "You're not the only one allowed to be sappy once in a while and besides, it's a fact universally known that love turns your brain into mush."

"In that case we're probably both doomed to become brain dead," he replied, adoration and love shining from his eyes.

"No way around it," she said warmly. "But I don't mind as long as we can be brainless together." She sighed. "Still need to make that call, but I'll be back shortly."

He nodded but a little insecurity crept back over his face.


With a last reassuring look she left the room and went out of hearing range. She fished out her clean phone and called Hightower.

"Agent Lisbon, what can I do for you?" the other woman answered the call, acting all professional again.

"Are you alone in your office?" Lisbon asked.

"Yes. You can talk openly. Has something happened?"

"Well, in a way. Look, Jane and I are still at your house and we're taking some personal time. Things have become a bit too much for him and he needs some peace to come to terms with the whole mess. I just wanted to inform you and ask if it's alright for us to stay here?"

A moment of silence followed her question while her former boss had to collect herself. "Of course it's okay, Teresa. I'm… I'm sorry I added to his distress. How is he? Can I do something?"

The senior agent sighed. "He'll be fine. He just needs some time to work through it all. He's strong, don't worry."

"The last thing I wanted was to cause him even more emotional distress. I don't know how to deal with all of this either and I can't begin to imagine how he must be feeling and now he has to deal with a crazy woman on top of it all. I'm really sorry."

"Madeleine, please. Feeling guilty won't help one bit. I admit that this wasn't the best timing, but you certainly didn't choose it, so it's a moot point. He's been under a lot of pressure for weeks now and I expected some kind of breakdown any day. This was just the clincher."

"I'm still mad at myself. Normally I'm always capable of controlling myself and frankly this whole situation is inacceptable. I honestly don't know what's gotten into me."

"It's called falling in love, Madeleine. Being out of control is the most common side-effect. And while we're at the topic: after talking it through with Patrick we have decided to inform the rest of the team and LaRoche of the situation to reduce the tension and deal with the whole thing head on."

"What? No! Absolutely not. I refuse. It's bad enough that you and Patrick know. I don't want anyone else to be aware of my stupidity and weakness. I'll pull myself together, I promise."

"Well, tough luck. I can't abide by your wishes in this case because the Red John situation doesn't allow us to lose our focus and you won't be able to avoid Patrick. You'll see that bucking up in such a state is just about impossible. You need to face this, Madeleine," Teresa said with determination.

"Teresa, please. I'll never be able to look them in the eyes again if they know. I was their boss once. It will be completely humiliating. They'll look down on me, maybe even despise me for being such a fool." She sounded desperate.

"That's nonsense. No one is condemning you for something like this. They were actually quite understanding."

"What? Are you implying that you've already told them? Without my consent? How could you? You had no right to do that." Hightower was truly agitated, her breathing accelerated.

"I'm the leader of the operational side of this case, Madeleine. And therefore it was in fact my call to make. I have a responsibility for my whole team and for you as well, and I can't with good conscience lean back and let a real disaster unfold before my eyes."

Lisbon sighed and continued, "You have been a leading agent yourself and you had to make some pretty difficult decisions, if I may remind you." She took a deep breath and went on in a tone commanding compliance, "Don't get me wrong. This is not my way of getting back at you, but I have to remind you that back then you yourself reprimanded me for avoiding to make certain decisions. You pushed Rigsby and Van Pelt into confronting their situation head on and now I'm asking you to suck it up and do the same."

Hightower took a shuddering breath. "You've changed, Agent Lisbon. You've turned into an even better, stronger leader since those days. My congratulations."

"Well, a lot of life changing things have happened during the last years. Mostly I couldn't depend on those higher up, so the only way was to adapt."

"Whatever it was, Teresa, it's turned you into a very fine leader. I might not like it, but-", her voice trembled, "-I accept your position and I'll abide by your orders."

Teresa acknowledged her assent in a friendlier tone. "Thank you, Madeleine. Believe me when I tell you that it'll make things easier in the long run even if it hurts both your pride and your feelings right now. You can decide whether you want to tell Rigsby yourself or if you want me or one of the others to inform him."

"I won't do it, but I don't care who else does."

"Okay. Well, I'll let you get back to your work then. Have a, well, nice as possible day."

In a subdued voice the dark-skinned woman replied, "Thank you, Teresa. And… take care of him. I'm sorry I hurt him."

"I'll do that. Please don't worry. He's strong. He'll bounce back and be his usual annoying self in no time," she tried to reassure both the other woman and herself.

They ended the call.


TBC

As you can see: very speedy updates from now on. So be quick and leave me a note, if you please.