III.
I could still remember the first time we made love.
We had been dating for a few months, and we headed back to my little apartment. We had just come back from your friends' engagement party, and we slowly walked back home, your tiny hand in mine. I'm still unsure, my love, how I ever deserved your love. We made it to the third and top floor of the small building, and I took a look at you as you removed your cream peacoat and tartan scarf. I could still remember your navy blue dress with golden embroidery that lined the hem, hugging your body like it was meant just for you. Your hair fell in soft, natural waves that reached your shoulders, and you just looked so beautiful it had to be a sin. I could still remember the soft smile you gave me that shook me to the very core, how much I needed you at that moment.
I could still remember how soft your skin felt under my hands, radiating warmth I greedily took. I could still remember the soft taste of honey off your skin, a sweet taste that reflected your soul. Every inch I uncovered, I practically devoured until all your clothes fell off. I can still remember how your body would jerk alive when I kissed that one spot on your neck, where your jaw met your ear, and I still vividly remember your soft moans that fuelled my desire even more. I can still distinctly hear your soft moans, how your body was writhing under my hands and lips, especially as I reached your perfect mounds and later, your hipbones. I can still remember the tug on my hair when you pulled my head back up so you could claim my lips with your own, bringing me back home.
I could still remember your soft breaths on my neck, whispering sweet promises against my skin. I could still remember the feel of your small dainty hands running a path on my chest, the feel of your hands ghosting down from my collarbone down to my waist, my body moving up to add more pressure that I craved, that I needed. I could still feel your lips as they traced the scar that went across the side of my face, and then the same path your hands had travelled before. Your lips, my love, brought on the most intoxicating feeling I'd ever felt, and brought me back to life. Your kisses healed my soul, they took the pain away from the past.
I could still remember the feeling when we finally joined, how complete and full I felt. I can remember how your warmth welcomed me, and how it felt like you were trying to keep me there, to keep me home, how it felt like you needed me as much as I needed you. I could still feel how much my love for you had overwhelmed me even more if even possible, how you were able to make me feel at peace. I can still remember how your eyes were shining with pure love and adoration; how your moans would become louder and would eventually drive me over the edge.
As we lay together in bed after cleaning up, feeling absolutely at peace, I could only keep looking at your soft features, your half lidded eyes looking up at me. I remember the soft kiss you gave me before you whispered words I never felt like I deserved from you.
"I love you, Ben Solo." Your eyes fluttered closed as you fell asleep. I brought you closer to me, and kissed your head before murmuring into your hair.
I love you more than you can even imagine.
