Warning: Explicit sexual content


The next day the whole team came to get him from the hospital. Patrick's every warning bell was set off when he took in the sight of them obviously all in their Sunday best. Teresa had brought him his nicest suit and a white, ironed shirt as well and ordered him to change into it, which made him even more suspicious. But his sneaky girlfriend managed to lie convincingly enough for him to believe that they'd simply made reservations at one of the city's best restaurants to celebrate his discharge from hospital and as a very special closed case meal.

And besides he was much too giddy to waste time overthinking anything. He'd been awake since three in the morning and ready to leave since four (or rather three weeks ago…) and by the time they'd come to get him at ten, he was almost crawling up the walls with excitement reminding everyone of an overzealous puppy. He was swaying on his feet and fidgeting with his fingers and grinning like a loon. And even though the whole staff had long since succumbed to his charms (in Lisbon's opinion a bit of a wonder considering his constant whining and complaining), no one was really unhappy to finally see him gone.

When they reached the parking lot it became clear to Patrick immediately that he'd been played, because a big, black, very official looking limousine was waiting there and four dangerous looking men stepped up to Jane. He felt like being part of a very bad spy movie. The 'mean' guys even wore grey suits and the obligatory sunglasses. They surrounded him without a chance for him to scram. Slightly panicked he cast a desperate look in Teresa's direction.

"I'm sorry, Patrick. I knew you'd try to do a runner if I'd told you the truth and I couldn't get you out of this," Lisbon explained sheepishly.

Before she could clarify what exactly 'this' was, Jane was politely but firmly led to the limo and made to get into it. He got a very bad feeling about this. Was he about to be put on trial for something? Or on his way to be interrogated by the FBI?

The fact that he wasn't in handcuffs reassured him a bit, and after the first wave of panic had passed and he could think clearly, he realized that his terrifying ideas didn't make any sense. Why would the team be dressed up like that if this was about him being prosecuted in any way? And besides, he liked to think that Teresa would've warned him if it was something worrisome like that. Furthermore, he was pretty sure he hadn't done anything even remotely illicit lately, what with being in the hospital and all. Even during the Red John showdown he hadn't done anything that could be deemed against the law. So the only logical conclusion was that he was currently being dragged to some official occasion - most probably a press conference.

He cursed Lisbon silently for allowing this to happen. All he'd wanted to do after weeks in priso…, okay at the hospital, was to go home. He wouldn't have minded a nice lunch with the team, but other than that he'd really, really longed to get home at long last and to spend some quality time alone with his girlfriend – something he'd missed dearly during the last weeks. Now he had to face who knew what for who knew how long and he hated it already - whatever 'IT' was.

So it was a very grumpy Jane who was escorted to City Hall by his four new grey clad 'friends'. A red carpet and hundreds of cameras greeted him and he was attacked by a cacophony of shouted questions. After weeks in almost isolation he felt like stepping into an alien world. Fortunately his escort was actually guarding him rather effectively.


Upon his arrival in the entrance hall he was reunited with the rest of his team. "What the hell?" he hissed at Lisbon.

The senior agent looked very bashful. "I'm sorry, Jane. I know this was kind of mean. But after the public found out that the former director of the CBI was actually a serial killer the Bureau really needs all the positive publicity it can get and it's truly a blessing that we were also the ones to expose him and end his reign of terror, and I couldn't say no any longer when Virgil put up the puppy dog eyes, and he's had a lot of pressure from all sides and he's been such a big help to me during the last weeks and took over a big bulk of my work so I had more time to be with you, and I'm sure it won't be that bad. I'll make it up to you, I promise. Please don't be mad, Patrick," she rambled.

"Lisbon, could you stop twaddling and tell me what's going on?" Jane asked with growing irritation.

But she was prevented from giving him any further information by very official looking people approaching them after someone had announced that the special guest of honor had finally arrived and was to be led into the banquet hall together with the other guests of honor.

Patrick shook his head in annoyance because he still had no real idea just what he'd be forced to endure.

What it would turn out to be was an award ceremony in which he would be conferred the Law Enforcement Congressional Badge of Bravery of the State of California for his courageous and selfless actions during the operation leading to the downfall of the notorious serial killer Red John and the apprehension of several of his most loyal confederates. The award was handed to him by the attorney-general in person.

It was first when he was presented with the badge of honor to the frenetic applause and cheers of the audience that he noticed that all of his friends and family had come to the ceremony. He could even spot several carnies amongst the crowd. It touched him to see them all there, but apart from that the whole affair mortified him completely. He was disgusted to receive accolades for something he still didn't deem the least bit remarkable. It all made him feel totally awkward.

But he was a showman and didn't let on about his deep discomfort at being in the limelight like that. In any other situation he'd probably turned nasty and caused a scene insulting the attorney-general or something like that. Only the apologetic and pleading eyes of his lover stopped him from going down that road and pointing out to the politician that cheating on his wife with his secretary wasn't very PC.

So when he was asked to say a few words, he just smiled his brightest and most charming fake smile and said seriously, "I'm honored to receive such an esteemed award and I thank you all for your kind acclaim." Afterwards he held up the decoration he'd just received, smirked deviously and added merrily, "Guess I'll have tons of fun now that I finally have a real badge of my own." The last of which elicited audible groans from his teammates and several members of both the CBI and the DA's office.

When Patrick was just about to leave the stage assuming the ordeal was finally over for him, he was intercepted by a government official immediately. "Mr. Jane, you can just stay up here. The other ceremony will start right away."

Jane cursed silently to himself and stepped back into the spotlight. Fortunately he was soon joined by Lisbon, Rigsby, Cho, and Van Pelt, as the whole team was to receive The Attorney General's Award for Exceptional Service for their outstanding work on the Red John case which had gone above and beyond their duty. They were lauded for nearly a decade of admirable dedication to the apprehension of one of the most vicious and dangerous criminals of their time.

Internally the whole team had to roll their eyes. Considering that the case had been taken from them several times over the years and they'd had to fight tooth and nail to stay on it, it felt a bit ironical to suddenly be commended for something they'd been sneered at for on more than one occasion. But following Jane's example from before they all took it in stride.


After the ceremony there was a reception held in their honor with champagne and canapés and quite a lot of tedious handshaking and picture taking. The press had been banned from asking questions but they were present numerously all the same watching their every move.

Jane was almost speechless when Pete (in a suit!) and Sam came over to him. Pete pulled him into a bear hug and patted his back until Lisbon felt the need to step in and remind him that Patrick was just out of hospital and still a bit delicate. "Shesh, woman," Jane complained indignantly after Pete had released him. "I'm not nor will I ever be delicate."

"Well, I was the one worried out of my mind when you decided to stop breathing again and again all the while you were conveniently napping like usual. So excuse me if I'm still a bit anxious when it comes to your health," Teresa half-teased, half-scolded.

"She has a point there, Paddy. Sorry if I was a bit vehement. I'm just so damn glad to see you. Got a call from Andy a few weeks ago telling me you almost died. We were all the way up in the north of Oregon at the time and couldn't make it back until yesterday. But Andy's been kind enough to grant us a spot for the trailer in his backyard, so here we are," Pete explained sheepishly.

Jane raised his brows. "You came to Sacramento solely for this ballyhoo?" He motioned around the hall. "A Turner at City Hall applauding someone for getting a law enforcement medal? There must be a serious disturbance in the inner workings of the universe," he teased his old fatherly friend, but deep down he was really touched.

"I'm pretty sure that's the first time a carnie's ever received a badge of honor, let alone two. Writing history today, Paddy. Wouldn't miss it for the world," Pete teased back with a bright grin. Then he bent forward a bit and added in a serious tone, "But first and foremost I wanted to see for myself that you're alright and to congratulate you for ridding us of the bastard who took Angie and Charlie. I hope this'll give you some peace, my boy. You really deserve it."

Sam stood beside Pete and nodded her consent and Patrick's voice was a bit hoarse when he answered, "Thank you. You saying that means a lot to me."

The dark-skinned carnie spoke up after that, "I hope you'll finally be able to forgive yourself. Angela would've wanted you to move on and she'd be very happy that you've found love again. I hope you know that, Patrick."

"I'm getting there," Jane replied quietly and was pulled into a warm embrace by Sam.


Later when things were finally starting to calm down Andy and Sheila approached Patrick, who wasn't surrounded by bunches of people for the first time in hours. He stood together with no one but his teammates and his grandparents and everybody who knew him well could see that seeing his oldest friend led to one of the very few genuine smiles he'd sported since entering City Hall – the first one had been for the complete Jane family who'd come to support him. The second he'd given Sam and Pete and now his childhood friend and his wife received the third one. They'd visited him several times during his hospital stay in Sacramento and had contributed greatly to keeping up Patrick's spirit, which hadn't been an easy feat.

"Andy, Sheila, thanks for coming! I'm glad, you're not totally fed up with me. I imagine I haven't been the best of companies lately," he greeted them warmly, gave Andy a one armed hug and pecked Sheila on both cheeks.

They both chuckled. "You were certainly a bit of a pain in the neck, Rick, but you and hospitals never really blended well. I still remember that time when you were what? Thirteen? And well, Alex got a bit carried away and you ended up at that little hospital in some hicksville in Idaho supposed to stay there for two days due to a serious concussion. You were puking out your guts but still cold-reading the nurses to annoy them. And boy, did you succeed! They released you already after one night," Andy told with a warm grin.

"Yeah, didn't like the aseptic smell there and those nurses telling me what to do. But to be honest I wouldn't have minded to stay there another night, if it wasn't for Alex threatening me that if I didn't pull myself together, be out and about again for my show the next day he'd teach me what real pain felt like. Got three square meals a day at that place and had a real bed there after all. Though throwing the whole food up again and onto said bed was a definite minus," Patrick answered a bit wistfully.

All his friends and family standing close by were astonished by his openness when referring to his father's abuse, though Jonathan probably less so considering that he had a big part in this new development. And though he'd heard quite a bit about the callous and cruel acts of violence and ruthlessness his son had committed against his grandchild he couldn't stop himself from cringing alongside everybody else when he was confronted with yet another of Alex's many atrocities Patrick had suffered. But the oldest Jane male was happy to see that his grandson was getting more comfortable sharing his past with his friends - and not just with the one who'd actually been a witness to quite a bit of it anyway. He cast him a proud smile and gave him an approving nod, but it was Andy who replied.

"Shit, Rick. It's really shocking how oblivious I've obviously been to the real extend of what your father did to you. You could almost say I was accepting of it in a way. I'm sorry I was such a lousy friend. My youth and immaturity at the time are my only excuses for my utter ignorance," he said with a sad expression, pulling his long time friend into another one armed hug. "It's really bothering me and I've thought about it a lot lately," he added meekly.

Patrick accepted the embrace for a moment but then he stepped back and caught Andy's eyes in a serious gaze. "Don't do that, Andrew. I didn't say that to make you feel guilty. Your friendship was one of the best things during my time growing up. I'm very grateful I had you in my life back then, and that I still have you, for that matter."

He looked for Andy's acceptance and when the other man nodded and had lost at least a bit of his ashamed look, Patrick continued, "And the best part about it was that you treated me like an equal – never any boy wonder crap with you. You were the only person my own age who took me as a regular guy. You were my only sense of normalcy. And your parents were great too. When I was at your place it was my first experience of what a family life could be like. So please don't feel bad about it. You were just a boy and if anyone, it should've been the other adult carnies who should've stepped in. But you know how it is in the community: you don't butt into others' affairs."

Andy squeezed his arm gently. "Yeah, and it's a damn bad rule! And one of the reasons I left. But you know, Sheila and I wanted to tell you something else, or rather ask you something. It's slightly bad timing and we don't want to draw off the attention you and the team deserve so much, but you know me. Patience has never been my strongest suit," he grinned sheepishly. "Sheila wanted to wait 'til later, but well…"

Patrick took one inquiring look at his friend and his wife and then a bright smile lit up his face. "You're gonna be a father," he stated happily. "Congrats, mate, and Sheila. That's great news."

"How did you… ah, never mind." Andy snickered and shook his head. "Yes, we're pregnant. 13th week. Not entirely sure at this point, but it looks like it's gonna be a boy," he said with pride shining from his eyes. "And well, Sheila and I wanted to ask you to become the child's godfather, Rick."

"You really want me to be the godfather?" Patrick's face looked like it would break in two from the splitting smile. "I'd… I'd be honored. But are you sure?"

Sheila chimed in warmly, "We couldn't wish for a better one, Rick."

The curly blond man had tears in his eyes and when he spoke his voice was thick with emotion, "Thank you so much. But I have to warn you. I'm gonna be a hands-on one and I'm gonna spoil him rotten."

"We wouldn't have it any other way, Rickyboy," Andy replied, visibly touched as well and very satisfied with his best mate's reaction.


Thus the tedious ceremony ended on a very happy note for the special guest of honor and he was at least half-way reconciled with the course his first day in liberty had taken by the time he was finally alone with Teresa in her car on the way home.

"I hope you know that you can thank Andy and Sheila for the fact that I'm not gonna rip you a new one when we get home," Patrick stated. "That and the small matter of me being randy as hell," he added with nonchalance.

Lisbon shook her head. "You know I had no choice. If I had told you, you would've tried to get out of it and I couldn't allow that."

"As long as you know I'll get my revenge for this…" he replied cheerfully, his hands and eyes busy examining the badge of honor and the ribbon he'd received. "What a hassle," he murmured shaking his head in disbelief.

"What do you mean, revenge?" Teresa asked warily.

Patrick chuckled. "That's for me to know and you to find out, my dear. Just you wait and see," He replied vaguely.

She cast him a skeptical sideways glance and turned her eyes back on the road. "About the other thing," she started again with a sigh. "You know you're not supposed to engage in strenuous physical activity. Doctor's orders."

He shrugged. "I don't give a damn, frankly. What do they know of the damage it would cause to my health if I didn't have my wicked way with you today? I might self-combust or something."

Teresa snorted. "Yeah, very likely. Look, I don't want to burst your bubble, Patrick, but I think we should wait until you're fully recovered."

"No way, Teresa. I'm not gonna wait a day longer." He shook his head vehemently.

"Well, it takes two to tango, honey. And I'm not willing to risk your health for a bit of sex."

Her blatant refusal angered him visibly. "What the hell, Lisbon? You have no qualms to drag me in front of a bunch of sanctimonious politicians and other self-important idiots, let alone media folks en masse, where I have to stand around for hours and make nice – which I only did for your sake, by the way - when I'm right out of hospital. But I'm too, what did you call it, ah, yes, delicate was the word, right? But I'm too delicate to make love to you? That's rich."

"That's different," she defended herself, but she had a bad conscience and she'd also missed him terribly, so her conviction was wavering.

"Oh really? How so? It's not like I announced I wanted to go through the whole Kamasutra with you today." He'd sensed her shifting mood immediately and had no intention of missing out on this chance to change her mind. It wouldn't take much at this point, he knew. "I'll even allow you to do most of the work," he added with a seductive smile.

She admitted defeat. "Alright, alright. You win. But nothing strenuous, Patrick. And I'll be the judge of what should be considered as such."

He smiled victoriously. "Just to make one thing clear though: I'll not accept it if your assessment of what is supposed to be too strenuous includes having an orgasm. Because if it does, I'll have to inform you that I'm absolutely capable of masturbating and I won't hesitate to do so." And with a suggestive wink he added, "Gladly in front of you, if you want me to."

He knew he'd make her blush with his explicit words and he noticed the red that colored her cheeks with great satisfaction. He loved to unsettle her like that. She'd become less and less straight-laced during their relationship, but she still had a problem with him talking openly about sex and he found her flustered reaction very endearing.

"Jane!" she scolded. "Do you have to be such a jerk about it?"

"Yep," he replied merrily. "You're very cute when you're abashed."

"Is that your way of paying me back?" she inquired.

He snorted. "Do you really believe I'd let you get away with such a little slap on the wrist? Nah. Rest assured that my revenge will be in proportion with my sufferings today. And you know – I'm an expert when it comes to revenge," he explained with a devious chuckle.

She looked very unsettled at the thought. "No chance for mercy?" she asked anxiously.

"Nope," he said with a big grin. "But I'll make sure, it won't hurt too much."


They'd arrived at their apartment at that point in their conversation and Jane left the car, eager to finally get inside the condo. Lisbon followed close behind with his baggage from his hospital stay because he wasn't supposed to carry anything heavy. He'd allowed her to handle it without arguing, though he was convinced that the bag containing only some toiletries, a book, a change of clothes and his PJs - she'd already taken most of his things back with her the day before anyway - didn't exactly count as heavy. But considering that he had big plans for them soon, he decided to indulge her at that point. And besides, it was never a good idea to interfere or heaven forbid: argue with Lisbon in protective mother bear mode.

He unlocked the front door and stepped inside their apartment. The first thing he did was taking a deep breath and moaning with pleasure afterwards. "Home, sweet home," he said with deep satisfaction, his face a study in utter contentment. He went to the kitchen and had already filled the kettle by the time Lisbon had made it fully inside.

She smiled at the sight of him in their kitchen, grinning like a loon, humming, and inspecting their tea supplies, exclaiming in delight when he found a very exclusive Lapsang Souchong his lover had obviously gotten for him and set to work preparing a pot of it immediately.

"You look like a happy, little boy right now," she told him fondly while she approached him. When he'd finished pouring the not-quite-boiling-anymore water this type of tea required, she pulled him down into a passionate kiss.

He broke it reluctantly after exactly two minutes to take the leaves out of the pot. "As much as I'd like to ravish you right here, right now, I have it on good authority that I'm not getting anything other than vanilla sex today, so I'll have to drown my sorrows in this fabulous tea first. Thanks for getting it for me by the way," he said with a wink and prepared them both a cup.

"Shall we move this over to the sofa, dear?" he asked his slightly pouting lover. "And stop pulling such a face. You're the mean tyrant here. I'm just the obedient slave who's afraid, he won't get any if he doesn't behave."

She punched him lightly. "Stop it, Jane. Or you'll really go to sleep unsatisfied tonight," she threatened him.

He faked indignation and rubbed his shoulder as if she'd hurt him, but changed his expression into playfulness just a moment later. After pecking her on the nose he bent forward and purred into her ear, "Just too bad I can practically smell your arousal, my love. You want me as much as I want you, and no one will go to sleep unsatisfied tonight." With that he deliberately brushed her ear lobe with his lips, straightened up, smirked, took the two tea cups and left for the living room.

Teresa followed him with a shake of her head and a deep blush coloring her cheeks again. "Damn it, Jane," she mumbled.


They drank their tea while cuddling on the couch both delighting in each others' presence. Soon enough their kissing and fondling turned from languid to heated and before things could get too much out of hand she ordered, "Bedroom!"

With a disappointed groan he got up from his very comfortable position (at least in his opinion it was) and followed her lead upstairs. When they'd reached their destination she took charge again. She stepped in front of him and opened the rest of the buttons of his shirt – the vest he'd already lost during their make-out session in the living room. Whenever he tried to touch her or her clothes she batted away his hands and told him to stop.

After she'd bared his chest, she started to kiss his exposed skin gently, going deeper and deeper and finally kneeling before him. Almost reverentially she first caressed the scar on his stomach with the tips of her fingers. Then she pressed her lips to it carefully and couldn't help the silent tears escaping her eyes.

He'd watched her the whole time and when he saw her crying he got down on his knees as well and pulled her into his arms. "It's alright, Teresa. I'm here and I'm fine now."

They spent several minutes in that position. Then he loosened his hold on her and wiped away the tears with his thumbs while he held her face cupped between his hands. His eyes found hers and the warmth she saw in his brought another round of tears to hers. She'd never seen him look at her quite like that. Something had changed in them, like the last vestiges of the lingering sadness that had always been visible in them had finally vanished. They sparkled, full of life, love, and tenderness. This combined with the overwhelming relief she felt for still having him in her life and back with her at home at long last suddenly became too much and with her face buried in the crook of his neck she succumbed to gut wrenching sobs.


His arms held her tight and safe while he whispered calming and soothing nothings into her ear, one hand drawing reassuring patterns onto her back.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled when the worst storm was over and she'd regained some of her poise. "This was supposed to be about you. I didn't mean to cry all over you."

"Please, my love. Don't apologize. I'm sure this has been a long time coming. You don't always need to be strong, not when you're with me." He took her face between his palms again and cleaned away the tear tracks with his thumbs, his eyes conveying the same depth of feeling that had made her break down earlier. Now it made her smile tentatively, eliciting a matching one on his face. Then he peppered her face with small kisses before he continued, "You've been keeping it together for my sake for weeks now. It's a good thing, you're finally letting it all out. I'm sorry, I was too busy being an insufferable and selfish patient to see how this all affected you. But I'm here for you now, Teresa. I'll always be, okay?" He pressed his mouth against hers for a short and sweet kiss.

"Oh hush," she scolded him lightly. "If I'm not allowed to apologize, neither are you. Not that I was exactly a fan of all that whining and grouching of yours, but I know how hard it is for you to be confined to a hospital bed and how frustrating it was for you to be so weak."

She caressed his cheek and took a deep breath. "It's just all catching up with me now that you're home and almost fully recovered." Another tear leaked from her eye. "I'm just so happy and grateful to still have you, Patrick. I nearly lost you. I watched you collapsing several times and I've never been so afraid in my life. I felt so helpless seeing you fighting for your life and I couldn't bear losing you. I love you so much." The tears were falling for real again and she pulled him fiercely against her. "You have no idea how much I love you," she murmured against his neck. "I almost lost you and it felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest. I can't imagine being without you, Patrick."

He buried his hands in her hair and started to massage her scalp. "I understand, Teresa. I've been there myself," he said quietly. "But I'm still here and we got our happy end. I love you with all my heart and I won't ever leave you, not if I can help it." He pressed his lips to the top of her head. "And now if you'd release me, I'll go to the bathroom and get you a wet cloth."

She shook her head no against his chest and replied with her voice hoarse from all the crying, "No, I'll go myself and freshen up a bit. You better be lying on the bed when I return, mister." She tried but failed to sound stern.

Jane chuckled and pecked her brow. "Yes, my dear. I'll indulge your orders, but for future reference: you might want to work on the demanding tone, Agent Lisbon. That wasn't very convincing."

Lisbon attempted to scowl at that, but failed miserably again, because a persistent, happy little smile had taken permanent residence on her lips, which only grew bigger when Jane's lips found hers. So it was first many minutes later that she finally got up and made her way to the bathroom, casting a pointed look first at him and then at the bed.


Patrick had only followed her request partly. He'd sat down on the bed propped up against the headboard but wasn't in a reclining position. He was watching the door waiting for Teresa's return. When she entered she cast him a puzzled and slightly irritated look. Before she could voice her protest, he spoke up, "We don't have to do anything tonight, love. I never intended to make light of your fears and if you're really so uncomfortable and anxious about the whole thing, we can wait. I mean, I feel perfectly fine and all, but that's not the issue here and I wouldn't want to force you into something you're not ready to do."

She stepped closer until she stood with her legs almost touching the bed. Her hands were busy opening her blouse, while her eyes searched his. "That's really sweet of you, Patrick," she replied with a smile, which grew and grew when she saw the hungry look he cast at her newly exposed cleavage.

She pushed the garment over her shoulders and teased him with the sight of her nearly naked torso only sporting a deep green lacy bra she knew he liked on her. And really – his eyes couldn't stop devouring her and she reveled in his obvious desire. Her hand moved down to the button of her pants and she heard him moan when she opened it and revealed the matching panties to her bra. She stepped out of her clothes and crawled on all fours on the bed in his direction.

"I'm sure this constitutes as torture," he groaned. "At least if you don't intend to go through with it."

Teresa chuckled and continued her approach until she'd reached him and scrambled up on his lap. "Don't worry, Patrick. I have no intention of stopping any time soon."

She angled her head and pulled him down into a kiss. They didn't stop until the need to breathe forced them to and with complete astonishment she realized that he'd somehow magicked her bra off without her noticing. He bent forward and feasted on one of her nipples with his mouth, while his hand was busy touching the other one, eliciting moans from her.

She let him play a few minutes but put a stop to it when his hand wandered lower and tried to sneak it under the waistband of her panties. He made a protesting sound around her nipple, which was followed by a 'plop', when her actions disconnected his mouth from its playing field. He looked up in obvious panic when she left her place on his lap and moved about two feet away from him.

Wide eyed and confused he mumbled meekly, "I thought, you said we wouldn't stop. But it's okay, I mean, as I told you, no need to rush things." Almost guiltily he tried to cover and hide the obvious arousal that tented his pants with his hands.

Teresa couldn't quell the burst of laughter his sheepish demeanor elicited in her. He looked like a crestfallen puppy that attempted with all its might to appear unflappable. "Geez, Jane! Did you really think, I'd leave you in this state?"

He nodded unsurely. "The thought crossed my mind. You're sending somewhat mixed signals here, Lisbon. Don't know what to think right now."

She snickered but managed to compose herself again afterwards. Then she moved a bit closer and whispered seductively in his ear, "Lie down, Patrick, and lose your pants and underwear." Her forefinger traced his sternum lightly. "I want to taste you and I want to take a close look and check out if all the right body parts are still attached."

He shuddered and obeyed quickly. When he lay before her in all his naked glory she gave him a critical once over, her hands following the movements of her eyes, touching him gently all over. This turned him on even more and he moaned in appreciation.

When she'd touched him just about everywhere she said quietly, "I think we'll need to fatten you up a bit. You've lost about a stone during your ordeal by my estimation. You have a slightly haggard look about you."

"It's mostly muscle mass I lost, I'm afraid," he replied, though he wasn't particularly interested in doing any talking at the moment. "I promise, I'll remedy that as soon as I'm allowed to work out again."

"Shush. I wasn't criticizing your shape, love, and you haven't just lost muscle mass. It's only natural that you'd lose weight after a serious abdominal injury. You weren't allowed to eat anything substantial for the first two weeks and the way I see it, you didn't eat any of the hospital food afterwards either. You lived of what your visitors brought you." She brushed a wayward curl out of his face. "I should know. I was there most of the time after all. And not that I blame you. The food they serve at these hospitals really doesn't look eatable."

"Yeah, but fortunately my visitors and especially you provided me with yummy food, so I can't have lost that much weight."

She played some more with the obstinate curl still inclined to return to its former place on his forehead. "You still didn't eat three square meals a day," she insisted.

"Okay, okay. I concede defeat and will put myself on a strict diet consisting of muffins, ice cream, hotdogs, burgers, and fries to satisfy your exacting demands," he teased. "But in the meantime I hope that my emaciated state doesn't keep you from doing what you did before. Not that I don't savor listening to your dulcet voice, but I was actually enjoying all that touching and wouldn't mind leaving the talking for later, my dear."

She gave him a playful slap but couldn't help snickering. He looked up to her with eyes so hopeful and cute, she couldn't resist him though she knew that was exactly what he'd aimed for with that particular expression. Her lips found his and they kissed for a long time, both caressing and exploring the others' body with roaming hands.

Lisbon was the one who broke the kiss and put her mouth to good use all over his body licking and kissing and nibbling. Finally she wound up at his crotch. With her hands, tongue, and lips she subjected that area to a very thorough examination accompanied by his increasing moans and incoherent babbling. Soon it turned into outright begging and when she took his penis into her mouth at long last he exploded almost immediately.

He spurted so much she couldn't possibly swallow all of it, but it wasn't her aim anyway. She didn't mind tasting him once in a while but didn't exactly relish the flavor of sperm and she knew that he knew that, and that unlike other men it didn't bother him in the least. Normally he would've actually made sure to warn her in time for her to remove her mouth, but he'd been too close already, something she expected him to apologize for as soon as he'd regained his faculties. As if on cue he panted, "Sorry, 'm sorry, couldn't stop."

She moved up to him so he could see her face. "I told you, I wanted to taste you, Patrick," she whispered lovingly and kissed him, sharing the remaining traces of his flavor with him. It had them both moaning. She broke the kiss and caressed his cheek. "I'm pretty convinced now that you're in working order, Patrick," she said with a warm smile.

"Could've told you that," he replied with a smug grin. "I had a test run in the shower a few days ago."

She shook her had in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding me, Jane. You actually masturbated in a hospital shower?"

"Hey, a guy has needs. What was I supposed to do? And it was your fault anyway," he answered completely unfazed.

"My fault?" Her brow went up and disappeared behind her hairline.

His grin widened. "Yep. You gave me that completely indecent goodbye kiss, you know? Doing that wicked thing with your tongue. And you tousled my hair. Not to mention that you fondled my chest with your other hand." He started to do to her exactly what he'd just recounted her doing to him a few days ago sans the kissing while he continued in a husky tone, "And then you just left me all hot and hard. Not even 30 minutes before I was supposed to meet my physiotherapist who happened to be a gay guy with a crush on me. Would you have preferred it if I'd let Sassy-Sammy take care of the problem?"

His actions distracted her but she still managed to discern that he was talking about some gay therapist playing with what was hers and uttered an indignant "Mine!"

"Yours?" he inquired with a snicker.

She cupped his face and glared at him. "No one's allowed to touch what's mine," she stated possessively.

"Well, I did touch myself as I mentioned before. I hope that's permissible, my dear." He lifted his head and pecked her on the mouth.

"Only in cases of emergency," she conceded, relaxing her features again when she realized how foolish her behavior was. But almost losing him had made her even more territorial.

He took it in stride and smiled warmly. "No need to be afraid. I very much prefer my releases to be caused by our shared actions, my love. And though I'm pretty sure that touching my butt that often wasn't strictly necessary for my exercise course, it certainly didn't do anything for me. But I guess, poor Sammy needs a bit of fun as well once in a while. That sorry fellow has to treat old ladies most of the time."

"He touched your butt?" she asked with some jealousy clouding her voice again.

"Geez, Teresa. Easy! I was only teasing you. My body is all yours and yours alone. Do with it what you want," he replied with a small chuckle.

Lisbon shook her head at her own stupidity. "Sorry. Don't know what's gotten into me. It's just…" She trailed off.

"Shush. It's okay. I think, I understand. You're still dealing with your fears of losing me. Why don't you let me show you that I'm still very much here with you?" he asked carefully.

She shook her head again. "No. I'm the one in charge today, remember?"

Jane smirked at that and in a swift move he took hold of the panties she was still wearing and pushed them down. "They'll have to go anyway," he stated and winked.

She batted his hands away but got fully rid of her underwear. He turned a bit on his side and caressed her flank ending up with a finger between her thighs touching her wet folds before she really knew what had happened. When she growled both in annoyance and arousal he removed his finger and brought it up to his mouth sucking in her juices with a moan. Her eyes turned wild at the sight of it.


With a last attempt at coherency she demanded, "You'll tell me the second something we do hurts, Patrick." After that and his concession they both stopped speaking for a long while.

Teresa started another round of exploration and Patrick got hard again moments later. She allowed him to touch her and he tried to do so as much as he could manage from his position lying on the bed with her half on top of him or wherever else she was at any given time.

In the end he just more or less gave up and let her have her way with him. It was what she really wanted, he knew. She wanted to reassure herself that he was still here with her and the best way to do so was through physical contact. It took him a while to fully let go, because it meant that he in turn also had to give into feeling his body alive like this. And though that should be something nice and life-affirming, it somehow scared him at the same time.

Even though he'd used the last weeks in hospital to do a lot of thinking and talking – the latter mainly with Teresa and Jonathan – he hadn't allowed himself to truly and fully realize all the changes that had occurred.

Madeleine had been right. He didn't really like change all that much.

He was essentially a man of habit. He liked things to be predictable for him. He very much enjoyed to surprise and unsettle others and his behavior appeared completely unpredictable to others, but it wasn't the case for him. He was a master in the art of thinking ahead. He almost always had at least a dozen possible scenarios and outcomes all plotted out in his head when he put one of his plans into motion and he could adjust accordingly if there occurred a glitch (and one of his favorite adjustments or rather variables was 'Lisbon-saves-the-day-with-her-impeccable-timing') .

What he didn't appreciate were circumstances entirely beyond his control being forced on him. It compelled him to change in ways that scared him and compromised the fragile sense of structure he'd managed to get back into his life after the total destruction of his whole existence a decade ago.

Intellectually he knew that he'd have to make some major re-adjustments in the near future. He'd in fact already started three months ago when he'd allowed himself to first move in and then get romantically involved with Lisbon. But now one (and for a long time actually THE one) of the driving forces of his life wasn't anymore. Red John was dead and he was finally free. Though that was a great chance for a whole new beginning and should certainly be seen as the most positive development his existence could've possibly taken, there was still a big part of him that was scared as hell.

He had to redefine himself and his purpose in life completely, a challenge he was only able to even consider because of the woman currently licking, kissing, and stroking her way down his legs. Still, most of the time during the last weeks in hospital after Joseph Earl's demise he'd felt utterly unequipped to tackle all the changes and turns, his life had recently taken.

Giving in to the situation at hand was like facing and conquering those fears at long last. Added into the mix of emotions swirling through his whole being was the fact that he'd almost died a few weeks ago. And he'd been bed ridden for quite a while with his body being more of a hindrance and cause of pain and struggle than anything useful and enjoyable. Now suddenly feeling alive like he did at the moment was completely overwhelming, almost shocking. Especially now that he'd succumbed so totally to the sensations and the reactions Teresa was coaxing from his body. It felt like every nerve ending was on fire, brimming with life, finally ready to really experience the world and life again.

It felt like something was trying to break free inside of him, like walls crumbling into bricks waiting to be fitted into an entirely new wing in his memory palace, one devoid of any previous information, only waiting to be filled with happy thoughts and recommencement.

So when Lisbon finally straddled him and joined their bodies he was very close to exploding. It was a testimony of his incredible self control that he managed to squeeze out a breathless, "Condom?" right before she mounted him, careful of his abdomen.

"Not necessary," she replied, equally as breathless. "I'm on the pill, love."

From there on it took only some very short minutes of her riding him until he roared out his fulfillment with total abandon, tears running down a face showing cathartic elation, the joy of being alive and unburdened escaping through a mixture of sobs and almost hysterical laughter.

"I'm free, I'm free, I'm free," he panted out like a mantra the moment he'd somewhat regained his breath, reassuring Teresa immensely who'd of course not been able to follow his internal struggle. Though she was certainly the person most in tune with Patrick Jane and his moods and could read him better than anyone else alive, she had been too preoccupied with her own issues to notice what she was doing to him (other than the obvious, which was arousing him sexually). She'd managed to practically kill two birds with one stone without realizing it: she'd truly and thoroughly reaffirmed for herself that yes, the man she loved like no one else before was really still with her and at the same time she'd helped said man to re(dis)cover himself.

His words told her enough to understand that she hadn't hurt him and that his sobs were caused by joy and overwhelming sensation and not pain. With the most carefree smile she'd ever seen on his face he gazed up at her. "I love you, Teresa Lisbon, and I think I'm starting to like the person in love with you as well," he stated, his voice thick with feeling. "And… and I think that maybe I might actually deserve it too."

She smiled back at him with an almost stunning sense of happiness at his unexpected confession. Bending forward she connected their lips and gave him a heartfelt kiss meant to convey all the sentiments she was unable to voice with mere words. A few minutes into it she noticed that he didn't return the kiss anymore because he'd fallen into a deep sleep, obviously totally exhausted physically and at an even stronger level emotionally.


Carefully so as not to wake him she slipped from her position on top of him. She spent several minutes kneeling by his side and just watching him sleep. More than ever he looked like an angel to her. She'd always loved seeing him like this – maybe because sleep was something so precious and scarce in his life and so when he actually caught some it made him look even more at peace for it.

Whatever it was about him in this state she knew it had been the sight of him sleeping on that old brown leather couch in the bullpen for the first time nine years ago that had sealed her fate. That fallen angel resting there with a small smile on his face and without that deep sadness hanging about him like a layer of pitch whenever he was awake had touched something deep inside of her. Maybe she'd fallen in love with him already at that point. She couldn't say for sure, but that it had fortified her resolve to make things work with the troubled man assigned to her team as her new consultant, she knew without a sliver of doubt.

Now it meant so much more, so many things, she couldn't possibly express with words. The intensity of what she felt right at the moment was almost hurting her heart that was bubbling over with sheer happiness. This was her future in front of her and for the first time in many years she actively looked forward to every single day to come. Had there been a witness in the room with them, they would've seen that her expression almost eerily mirrored his.

Patrick's smile (growing even brighter when she caressed his cheek lightly) was more dazzling than any she'd seen on him before. He shifted into his favorite sleeping position, lying on his side, legs tucked up a bit, and his hands buried between his knees. She listen to his strong deep breathing and knew with total clarity that he was the most precious thing in her life. Still having him here with her made her the happiest person in the world and whatever hardships, changes, difficulties or other setbacks she might have to face from now on could be nothing but small irritations compared to the blessing she'd received when this man had entered her existence. And whatever would happen, she wouldn't have to face it alone again, because if you could say one thing consistent about her lover it was that he was loyal to a fault when it came to those he loved.

Tenderly she covered him with a blanket which he snuggled into at once with a happy little sigh of contentment. Before leaving him to his much needed nap she bent over him, pecked him on the cheek, and whispered in his ear, "I love you with all my heart, Patrick Alexander Jane. And we deserve each other and our happy end together."


TBC

Yes, it sounded like the end - but it's not, not yet... still a few more things to get wrapped up first, so two more chapters until the "real" epilog. I want to leave as little unfinished business as possible before I leave them to their happily ever after...