Hello fellow wingnuts! I'm sorry I have been on hiatus for so long. So I'm back with another J & D one shot. This is based off of their scene in the 7x01. It's obviously not going to be fluffy so read at your own risk.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own these characters. If I did they would have been together 7 seasons earlier.

xXxXxXxXxXx

"And if you think that I don't miss you every day."

He regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth. He shouldn't be making her feel guilty. After all, he was the reason this had all happened. Her leaving, it was entirely his fault. He'd known she was meant for greater things. He could see it in her eyes the first day he'd met her. Donna Moss, intelligent, likeable, witty, everything American politicians lacked, but greatly needed. But he was selfish. Never in his lifetime had he had the same connection with someone that he had with Donna. The witty banter, the longing glances, the inside jokes. It wasn't just a co-worker thing. It was a Josh and Donna thing. He saw her eyes drop to the ground, the feeling of guilt creeping into his gut. He shouldn't blame her. But a part of him did. How could she have just walked away from him? She did it so easily. Like the past 7 years hadn't happened. Like she hadn't shattered his heart into a million pieces when she joined the Russell campaign. The thing he'd been dreading for 6 years had happened. He'd lost her. That why he did it after all. Keeping her as his assistant. Not allowing for her to move forward with her career. Because he had been petrified of losing her. But he lost her anyway. He eyed her across the desk. She was chewing on her lower lip, and he could tell she was on the brink of tears. His angry demeanor from a few moments ago was gone. Seeing her like this made him want to hug her and forget what happened the last few months. His heart, as always, was ignored and he sat motionless, watching her from his chair. His mouth spits out a few words, none of which he really understood, but she holds up her hand to stop him. It's a simple gesture yes, but it breaks whatever is left of his heart. She grabs her bag, the sadness in her eyes quickly dissolving into anger.

"Thank you for your time." It was so dreadfully polite. So, unlike them. She seemed completely different from the girl who stood in his office 7 years ago and gave herself a job. It takes all his power to not run after her as she storms out of his office. He doesn't know whether he wants to laugh or cry. Everything about this situation seems so foreign and dreamlike. If you'd have told him a year ago that this would happen, he would have laughed. He seems to be running out of will power because he stands and walks to the door, watching as she storms away from his office. A new wave of pain comes over him and closes the door to his office. He leans his head up against it, closing his eyes. He used to be the one she'd come to with all her problems. She used to be the one that came to him when he was upset. They didn't have even that anymore. Who was he supposed to rant about this too? Who was supposed to tell him to go to sleep? Who was he supposed to lean on? It had been Donna 7 years. He couldn't imagine it being anyone but Donna. He didn't want it to be anyone but her. Nobody could replace her.

xXxXxXxXxXx

"And if you think that I don't miss you every day."

There it was. The guilt she had been pushing aside for the past few months came rushing over her instantly. She had tried to tell herself that this was all his fault. The reason he had left was because of him. But she knew deep down it wasn't. She left because of she had to. If she could, she would have stayed his assistant for as long as humanly possible. It wasn't a though she hadn't loved being his assistant. She had in fact, loved every minute of it. Even the parts she hated, she loved. Because she spent it all with him. Gaza taught her that she needed to move on. The prospect of a new career excited her. Doing things that mattered. Josh would argue that the things she did for him were of importance. But she wanted more. She had for a long time. She just hadn't wanted to leave him. She would never forget the look of absolute heartbreak when she told him she'd quit. She had wanted to hug him so desperately in that moment. Tell him that he wasn't going to lose her. Of course, it would have been a lie. Because he lost her. She hadn't meant for her departure to ruin them. She had naively believed that it wouldn't change anything. Her lip begins to tremble as she looks at the ground. She had really believed he would take her back. Again, it was naive of her to think so. The pain she caused him was something she could never take back. Then again, the pain he caused her was something he could never take back.

"I can make a couple of calls…" she cut him off instantly but putting her hand in the air. If there was one thing she couldn't handle it was Josh's pity. She didn't want to be pitied by him. She wanted more than ever for him to tease, to mock her, to invite her back, only to give her flowers on this day for the next however so many years. She longed for him to be the Josh she knew.

"Thank you for your time." It hadn't felt right. It felt all to foreign to be saying something so painfully polite to a person she used to whack when he pissed her off. She was angry now. But not at him. She was angry at herself for not waiting a little while longer. To have joined him on the Santos Campaign. If she could take it all back she would. But she can't. She stands and storms out of his office, the tears welling in her eyes daring to fall at any moment. She feels his eyes on her as she does this. She wants to turn around and run straight back into his arms. To fall into them. To finally let the feelings she'd bottled up inside of her for the last 7 years to come out all at once. What else did she have to lose? She'd already lost him.