Author's babble: Hello all! It's feels like it's been a terribly long time since my last update. I blame the festive season. Not because I'd been heartily enjoying myself... But rather due to exhaustion from the torment of family gatherings and all the hectic atmosphere xmas through new year seems to bring. In any case, I love you all and thank you again for your support, or general enjoyment of this fic. :)

CHAP 52:

The circumstances of Elijah's first kill had been fairly straight forward. As a fledgling vampire he lost control. There had been no malice behind his actions or ill intent. But as Elijah shared every detail of the torment that plagued him, it became evident that his mistake, weighed heavily on his conscience. The fact that his kill had been an accident, and an ill-informed one at that. One that many made, as he told me. It didn't occur to me to make reference to this and compare how it differed to what I'd done this evening. What I'd done was no accident. But I could tell from the way his voice became coarse and he took pause more often than needed to punctuate his deep regret, that he still held himself responsible to this day. That single murder haunted him and he'd committed many more since then. We still felt the same about what we'd done. Elijah and I both had no control over the events that plagued and would continue so for us. It felt like I'd had more control in my role. But that had been Klaus' doing. Perhaps he'd wanted me to feel as though I'd been more involved in the kill than I really was. That way he could try and manipulate me further by guilting me. It was possible. But I suppose he hadn't expected me to react how I had. However falsely I'd behaved for his benefit. He'd seemed genuinely put-out by my traumatised state earlier. It seemed to stress him. His slapping me hadn't even seemed like a calculated aggressive manoeuvre, rather one of desperation.

We fell into silence after a time. It was comfortable and soothed me further. So much so that I was inclined to sleep. But the night wasn't over and Klaus might yet come looking for me again.

"Do you think Klaus will try and get me back out there soon?" I tried to stifle a yawn.

"I believe we can expect him any time now yes," he paused. "However, don't concern yourself with him. Perhaps you should rest, some sleep might do you good. Keep in mind if he should show up that you need to keep in character from earlier. I believe if you maintain that traumatised behaviour he will leave you alone. After all he has his substitute." Sleep did sound good. Not to mention a hopefully peaceful escape if I could get past the sight of the young girl when I closed my eyes for too long. Fat chance.

"I can't sleep. Every time I close my eyes I see her." My heartache at this was evident from my tone of voice. Elijah cleared his throat a little then spoke softly.

"Of course." Yawning again I then wriggled slightly lower beneath the bed covers. "In the event you do, I'll be here. I've no intention of leaving unless Klaus asks it of me." Elijah assured. Searching his face I found his eyes in the glow of moonlight that softly illuminated the room.

"You probably shouldn't you know." I pointed out yawning openly, my body enthusiastically displaying it's exhaustion now that sleep had had a mention.

"I know."Came his murmured reply before he kissed the top of my head. My heart swelled and I fought not to tilt my head up as his mouth retreated and press mine to it. I'd already been too forthcoming with my feelings earlier. I didn't need how I felt to drag on the teasing emotions between us. Keeping Elijah at a distance was still required. It felt easier to be open and intimate with him now that I'd been reminded of us in the bathroom. But I needed to distance us again. He needed to be thinking and acting clearly. With certainty I would only cause conflict. Elijah's protective behaviour now was already concentrated because of me. Because of us. In some ways I hated what I did to him.

At some point I must have indeed fallen asleep, because I found myself jolted awake when a large bang and the sound of wood splintering pierced my weary mind. Groggily my heavy eyelids pried themselves open a sliver while my ears trained on what had disturbed me.

"What do you think you're doing?" Klaus' angry voice bellowed. He was here. My mind making itself aware of what it needed to do I shifted my arms so I could raise myself half up off the bed as I twisted my torso slightly to find Klaus standing just inside the door. I noted the door in question actually hung awkwardly. He then flicked on the light and blurred towards me. When I felt movement on the bed beside me I noted he was speeding towards both of us. Elijah must have vaulted over me to block Klaus' approach because for a moment he stood with his back toward me and spoke Klaus' name, before being cut off as Klaus leapt on him and they tumbled onto the bed, half trapping my legs.

"Klaus," Elijah began again.

"Was I not clear earlier brother?" Klaus seethed and pulled Elijah up off the bed to stand before him while he gripped the collar of Elijah's shirt. Flinging the covers off me I sat up properly on the bed in time to see Elijah thrown across the room and into the open door, splintering it.

"I was only restraining her Klaus. Comforting her with the pressure an unborn child finds most comforting in their mother's womb." Elijah explained as Klaus advanced on him. He then lifted Elijah up and held his neck against the wood with a hand while he grabbed and twisted in unnatural angles, Elijah's right arm. Elijah wasn't fighting back. I desperately wanted to help him. But I needed to act a certain way right now.

"You looked too cosy for that to be the explanation."

"Because Elena, had finally fallen asleep." He gasped and groaned, some annoyance inflected through his pained response. "She wasn't at all happy with my presence. Nor my help."
"Klaus." I whispered weakly, a sad and lost expression on my face. My previous movements had made the front of my robe fall open. And while self conscious as I was about it I would have drawn it shut, I ignored it. As though I had more pressing things on my mind than modesty. My appearance needed to be as dishevelled as my emotions were portrayed to be. I saw him loosen his grip on Elijah and drop his head slightly before looking back over his shoulder at me. His eyes ran down then back up my body, taking in my appearance and no doubt still swollen eyes. Something in his own soared past the anger that held dominance there. It was akin to selflessness. I saw love, shame and worry in his eyes as he released Elijah then turned to face me completely. Klaus then left his brother and strode slowly towards me, searching my face with intensity. I maintained a miserable air about me as Elijah's body emitted some sounds of stress while he realigned his arm back by the door. As Klaus came to a stop before me he drew the front of my robe shut before directing some hair back over my left ear. My eyes dropped from his and closed.

"I haven't the time for this, Elijah." Klaus spoke softly. I reopened my eyes, filling them with fear then connecting Klaus' and my gazes.

"Please don't make me go out there." I pleaded up at him keeping myself as pathetic as possible.

"No, no. Shh-." He soothed and lowered himself to a squat before me. "I'm not going to love." Though I tried to mask my surprise I knew some of it broke through and altered my mask. But I couldn't tell whether it was picked up on as Klaus' demeanour returned to being more forceful.

"Shut the door Elijah. Be quick about it." Elijah did so and Klaus got down to business. There was some fear in his following orders. Not for himself but for me. Although in a round about way it all lead back to him. "I want you to go. Take Elena. Jonas as well. Just get away from here. I will contact you at some point. There are werewolves amongst my guests."

"Are you certain?"

"Of course I'm certain." Klaus growled. "They went to a lot of trouble to remain hidden, but magic leaves it's traces. Even if I can't smell them. Now get going!" I saw the confusion on Elijah's face and so did Klaus since he grabbed at Elijah's clothes again and pulled him in close and practically growled his next words out. "I am trusting you brother. To get my girl away and keep her safe. This needs to be done with the least amount of suspicion. So I cannot do this myself. I have my fill-in doppleganger. You, must go. Don't question it. You are possibly the most invested and powerful of vampires I have with me. Though your feelings for Elena are a weakness, they have their use now." Elijah understanding, nodded his head.

"Are we to leave out the back entrance?"

"No. Out this window." Klaus released him.

"Alright." Elijah moved to stand before me. "Elena," he took my hands and pulled me up to stand. Treating me like I was fragile. "You need to get dressed, quickly."

"There's no time for that. She'll go as she is." Klaus instructed as he tugged and pulled at my robe again before re-securing the belt to ensure my body was covered as well as the garment allowed. He then cupped my chin and stared into my eyes meaningfully. "Do whatever Elijah asks of you. Trust him. I will catch up with you at some point." I could only nod. Adrenaline had begun to surge within me at what was going on. But more importantly why. But I had to keep up my traumatised and helpless facade. "Good." He praised softly.

"Any destination in mind?" Elijah turned his head to ask of Klaus.

"No. Just drive. Keep on the move. You know what dogs are like." Elijah looked back to me with worried features while Klaus strode over to the window and smashed it with a few well-directed blows of his fist then cleared some of the shards that still sat in the frame sticking up dangerously like teeth.

"Is Jonas expected to leave this way as well?"

"No. I was about to suggest you get Elena out. Store her on the roof then return for Jonas and direct him to your car. He can leave calmly out the front or back, soon have the engine running of your car. You can then collect Elena and go."

"I'll do exactly that."

"If you'd go through the window first I'll pass Elena out through it to you."

"Very well." Elijah sprung through the opening with ease and got into position on the other side. All we could see of him was his head. Klaus then picked me up bridal style and carried me to the opening. In the process I clung to him with what strength I could as though afraid and not wanting to let him go. Once he began raising me up my grip on him became a problem.

"Elena," he soothed. "You have to let go, love." Making a big show of how difficult it was to do so I slowly released him and stayed still as he lifted me with only the support of his hands up and through the window where I fell for a moment before Elijah caught me. I then maintained my clingy behaviour while Elijah started walking along the building before leaping up and finding his feet on it's roof.

"You're doing well. I won't be long. I apologise for the cool air."

"It's fine." Then he was gone.

Elijah had returned within ten minutes. Then he was running and leaping with me in his arms until we stopped by a running dark car and got in the back. Jonas was in the drivers seat and we were off immediately, even before Elijah'd shut the door .

"Impromptu road trip anyone?" Jonas questioned heartily and we all laughed. I couldn't believe I was out of that place, and without Klaus. I felt so free despite the confines of the car.

"I can't believe Klaus sent me away with you two." I commented into the darkness of the car, truly awed.

"The situation called for desperate measures I suppose. Jonas, did you want me to drive?"

"No. I'll drive for the first stint." Elijah then shifted slightly and straightened his jacket while I belted up.

"Did either of you have anything to do with this situation?" I queried with mild suspicion.

"No." Elijah replied. "The werewolves have been most helpful on their own."

A little while later I was sat, silently staring through the darkness in the back seat and out the window where the occasional light permeated the even deeper dark. We'd all been silent for a time and having slept earlier, I couldn't get back to it. I felt calmer for my nap. The girl's death no longer affecting me so intensely, was both a relief and a concern. All of a sudden a low rhythmic noise began originating within the car. Slightly alarmed due to the dark I whispered loudly, questioning what it was. Jonas chuckled softly and told me it was Elijah, snoring of all things. I pulled at my seatbelt and sat as far forward as it would allow and spoke again.

"You mean he's sleeping?"

"Yes. Surely you've noticed him sleep before?"

"Well, yes. But never snore. And I assumed sleep was more a habit than a requirement. Being vampire and all." Jonas nodded and kept his eyes forward on the road.

"Well, he hasn't been sticking to that habit for a little while now. In fact I think this is the first time he's allowed himself to sleep, rather than doze."

"Is that because of-?"

"You? Yes. He's been worried for you. Spending your nights with his brother." It was only now that Jonas had mentioned it that I recalled Elijah looking a little fatigued. But now maybe I was looking for that as I replayed the last few interactions with him. He hadn't looked tired. But he hadn't seemed as fresh as he could. It was so hard to tell because as long as he fed surely his body would be in tip-top condition. The way Jonas mentioned my sleeping arrangements highlighted once again how Elijah shouldn't want me since I'd been with his brother. And yet, he did. How he'd been tonight was evidence of that. Though none of this was my doing, it brought back how cheap I felt at being in Klaus' bed and how everyone knew what went on behind our closed door. Talk about a conversation duller.

"Oh. I'll stop talking then, so I don't disturb him." I saw Jonas nod once more in the glow from the dash and slowly sat back where I had been. I found Elijah'd moved as his snoring sounded closer now. Judging that he was leaning towards me slightly, but mostly back against the back of the seat, it didn't seem comfortable. It was possibly the reason he suddenly stirred.

"Elijah?" I whispered softly. Not sure if he was now awake.

"Mmm? What's wrong?" His voice was muffled from sleep but he was immediately on some scale of alertness.

"Nothing. Nothings wrong." I assured him quietly. "Do you want me to get in the front with Jonas so you can stretch out on the back seat?"

"No. Do you want me to?"

"No. I'm not sleeping for a good while yet."

"I've no need to either," he began.

"Yes you do. You were snoring. It's really no problem if I move to the front." I made to unbuckle my seat belt in the dark, but Elijah put his hands on mine, stilling them.

"I don't wish to disturb you. Just, stay." Though I couldn't see him clearly my eyes looked to where I thought his own were as I processed his request. Not that I needed to see his eyes since I heard the controlled desperation in his hushed voice. But I was having a hard time not reacting in rejection with his hands still on mine. There was pressure in his command no, plea. Whether it was intentional or just appeared I couldn't tell. Stay could have just related to my location in the car. But in this case it was deeper than that. At a crossroads it took me some long considering seconds before I relented.

"Okay. But you might want to find a position that doesn't give me a cramp in my neck knowing how uncomfortable it is." I finished light-heartedly. Trying to ease the tension within me from the emotional confrontation I'd just endured. It also gave me some sense of light-weighted normalcy as Elijah squeezed my hands appreciatively. The action stirred emotions within me I couldn't let myself acknowledge.

"As you wish." He broke off releasing my hands. Then I could hear him shifting around. "You're certain you don't wish to sleep?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I replied sighing and looked back out at the darkness passing by. Elijah's movements quietened then something was laid in my lap. Something suspiciously head-like. I froze for a moment and he must have picked up on it. "I'm in your way. I really think I should hop in the front." I began again. This position was all too comfortable. Which made it a problem.

"Nonsense. You're never in the way."

"But-."

"You said you'd stay." That stumped me for a moment for my heart ached with every resistance and double-check of any overly accepting behaviour I made.

"I-. I did. But, Elijah."

"Please don't go back on your word." His soft voiced oozed sadness then we fell silent for a few minutes. I supposed I could be his pillow. It was excruciatingly obvious that we needed to talk. But it also didn't feel right to start that right now. Not with Jonas a third wheel. That wouldn't be fair to either of them. The last thing I wanted to add to this new turn of events was make it worse by instigating awkward silences and abrupt conversations. But I also hated being pressured in this current state of things.

"You'd better be comfortable then." I stated finally.

"I am if you are," he trailed off for all the world sounding accommodating. "Are you?"

"I'm not uncomfortable." It was true. I was worried and anxious of how I was leading him on by accepting this position. But not uncomfortable. In fact my fear was due to this feeling so right.

I managed to relax within the darkness again. Choosing to look out the window instead of staring down to where Elijah's head rested, facing the roof of the car supported by my thighs. It didn't take long before he was gently snoring again and I felt a sense of responsibility for him. Stupidly feeling as though by allowing him to sleep as he'd chosen, I was aiding his peaceful recuperation of rest. Stupid, stupid, stupid. That self negativity kept cycling around to remind me as I sat feeling so content as the distance we travelled increased. Then when at some point during the night Elijah shifted and became still again my heart leapt in my chest and the warm feeling that swelled inside me, that this vampire. This Original vampire was taking comfort in me. Resting in my lap like I was where he garnered his strength from. Much as I had done at different times. It forced tears to well in my eyes and I had to really fight in order to keep them from spilling over, possibly to fall down my cheeks then onto him if I didn't stop them in time. It was so beautiful, how Elijah found solace in me. It made me feel all the more heart wrenchingly responsible for how he felt about and towards me. It was so wrong, how right it was. How perfectly reasonable such trust was.

As morning crept out from the blackness of the night, the car gradually illuminated and I found myself gazing down at my lap. Elijah's head was on it's side. His face nuzzled at the front of my bathrobe the rest of his body facing the roof while his bent legs leant to the side against the back of the seat. The lighter the inside of the car became I found myself fascinated with his jaw. Where it curved upwards just below his ear and the stubble that was now evident on it. My fingers brushed tentatively along the growth before the movement became more confident. So taken in by my own private tactile perusal of his jaw I was at immeasurable ease when Elijah shifted his position again. Now facing the roof again I took the exposure of more of his jaw and face as an invitation. My fingers worked themselves gently on his jaw until both my hands were splayed along it while my thumbs stroked down over his chin and down his neck. Only stopping when the coarse hair did. My hands then smoothed up over his face and framed it while my fingers stroked along the line where his skin met with the hair on his head. This powerful vampire taking refuge in my lap was astonishing to behold. So caught up in wonder, when Elijah opened his eyes I took them in. They burned and drew me in even more until I found myself stroking the outer corners of his eyes while my head bowed over him to maintain the stare. Only when Elijah's face contorted into a blissful smile did I become somewhat self conscious of what I was doing. But it was his mouth opening fully so that he could whisper my name that had me reeling. Like I'd been stung I removed my hands and looked out the window scowling, my face reddening as I gripped the seat beat over my shoulder with both hands to keep them from being near him. Again he whispered my name but I gave the slightest shake of my head and maintained my stare. How could I be so stupid? Shit, shit, shit. I was so angry with myself. Touching him as though to memorise was not the kind of behaviour one who wants to distance herself should do. I supposed I could just say that yes, I was memorising him. Because I had accepted that pending my pregnancy, I was going to die. But Elijah would no doubt want to explore my need to memorise him before that time came. I was stuck with him for the next little while after all. While I hadn't thrown Elijah physically off my lap perhaps I was emitting some sort of uncomfortable aura. So he sat up and shifted slightly away from me so our legs weren't touching. The distance helped.

"Where are we Jonas?" Elijah asked and as I listened in the constructed air of indifference about me.

"I'm not certain I should tell you in the presence of Elena." That broke through my forced distancing. Elijah glanced to me as I glanced to him and awkwardly, I flicked my eyes to Jonas.

"Why not?" I asked curiously. "Won't I see the signs anyway?" I looked at the back of Jonas' head.

"No. You won't. Klaus had Greta put a anti-navigation spell on you soon after you arrived at his residence. Didn't you notice the lack of signage when Klaus took you out the other night?"

"Well. No. Nothing that told me exactly where we went. But Klaus drove us through back streets." His head moved as he nodded.

"To keep up the charade. In case you became suspicious about what you saw and comprehended location-wise." Keeping most of his focus on the road ahead Jonas took a breath and explained further. "Because of your doppleganger qualities it was wise to err on the side of caution in case you could overthrow the magic's influence. The idea of such a spell is usually to calm someone. It can result in the intended recipient of the magic feeling at home, when they would otherwise find travel or new surroundings bothersome. It's been quite successfully used for people who have a fear of flying. They're aware of the plane, and the fact that it flies. But feel at peace, as though at home. The key is that they don't know the distance they're travelling, nor the height. Their mind just can't comprehend the facts and figures." This certainly explained a lot. Though Jonas now telling me about it all seemed counter productive if I was capable of releasing myself from the spell.

"So this didn't cause my body to reject the magic?" Came my query. I hadn't after all, been aware of my body guarding itself shortly after my arrival.

"No. Likely because it's a remedial spell. It, like everything else however still had an effect on Greta." I frowned.

"Isn't this conversation counter-productive? Now I know, is it possible I could over throw the spell?"

"Seeing as it hasn't encountered any resistance from you so far I think it's safe to assume you're stuck with it influencing your ability to navigate."

"In any case," Elijah butt-in. "It's probably safest you don't know where you are. If for instance the werewolves know of your family and want to use them as leverage, should they make contact with you now in some way. The tiniest detail, like where you are mightn't end well. You mightn't disclose it intentionally. However, on the other hand we know how much you love your family." Yeah. We all knew. I love them enough to keep them safe by enduring Klaus. With the possibility of forever.

"Fair enough." I accepted then slowly returned my gaze out the window again. I felt somewhat robbed at not knowing where I was. Essentially, I was travelling. Yet I couldn't even take advantage of it by taking in the sights and recalling them from where I'd been. It also felt very controlling. Having something embedded so deeply within my psyche. I didn't like it. But it made sense and I had no choice. I'd managed this long.

"To be safe I'll just wait for a sign to tell me what I want to know, Jonas." Elijah finished and Jonas nodded again before changing the subject.

"Any preference for breakfast?" That got my attention again and I glanced back within the car to find Elijah looking at me, before replying neutrally that anywhere would do.

When we came to a township that was coming to life, workers opening shops and getting ready for the day ahead Jonas drove around behind the main street and found a secluded parking spot. Both he and Elijah unlocked their seat belts as the car came to a stop and I followed suit.

"I saw a bakery opening, if that's a suitable food source?" Elijah offered in question as Jonas turned off the engine.

"Sounds great." I replied nodding, then opened my door and stepped out. As I straightened Elijah appeared before me. His body and extended arms boxing me in the space made by the open door so I couldn't pass. My expression turned quizzical.

"I think you should stay in the car." Elijah stated with concerned features.

"What? Why?"

"For your safety. We're not all that far from where we set off and have made no attempt to back-track or confuse our path of travel. It's just a precaution. Jonas and I won't be long."

"Understood. But I was hoping to use a bathroom if one's open."

"Of course." He frowned and took in my appearance. Taking some of my right sleeve between his thumb and two fingers, he rubbed it between them as he considered me. "In that case this stop may be longer than intended as you'll need some acceptable public attire now if you've need to leave the car. Still, I want you to stay here while Jonas and I find food and scout out a public restroom."

"Won't we be quicker if I come with you two?"

"Possibly. But your current dress will only attract attention. Both bothersome in the present and after we leave, should anyone question the locals." I knew it might look odd to be walking around in a robe. But some people go out in public in their pyjamas. There was some similarity with what I wore. Who was to know I was nude beneath it and not wearing some really short bottoms?

"But-."

"Elena. I'm asking you to stay in the car. Please. Just until it's safe." He backed up his request with a meaningful look that melted my insides and extended into discomfort. I assumed that was his intention as he somewhat smirked when I lost the confidence in which I'd been questioning him and had trouble maintaining eye contact. Jonas cleared his throat and we both turned our heads to him, standing near us at the boot of the car smiling.

"If you two don't reach an agreement, we may as well keep driving without the pit stop." He commented heartily. After giving him an apologetic look I returned my focus to Elijah.

"Alright, I'll stay here." Came my defeated announcement as I sat back down.

"It's just for now. Soon you can get out as much as you please," he assured me. "First thing's first. What from the bakery would please you for breakfast?"