CHAP 53:

Elijah returned after about five minutes and went straight to the boot. After popping it he bent over and I heard a long zipping noise before he began rummaging around.

"Can I get out yet?" Elijah paused, straightened slightly and caught my eye before holding up a light blue, long sleeved dress shirt and assessing it.

"Yes. Come round to the boot." Doing so Elijah straightened more, turned and extended the shirt so that it's shoulders were level with mine as he assessed the length. "Although I had intended to find you some proper clothes, I've decided to avoid breaking an entering to do so. That is the only option at the moment due to the early hour." I could have told you that. "I'd rather not attract attention. Once we're more travelled we'll get you properly outfitted. Until then, I thought that something of mine might sufficiently dress you for a public outing. If it can be worn without attracting attention," he paused frowning. "But my shirts don't look like they'll be long enough." His arms fell, taking the shirt with them. If I wore it as a shirt, no way would it cover my bum. But if we needed to be crafty, its possible the shirt would be just fine to wear.

"Hang on." I instructed and took the shirt from him. Instead levelling the top of it beneath my armpits but above my breasts. I then checked the length and it was passable as my mind planned out my next move. It would be short but not overly revealing. It would do. "This will do. Did you find a loo?" I needed some where to change. Elijah's features looked puzzled.

"Yes. But there's no way to discretely get you there in the robe. And the shirt will not do. It doesn't cover you well enough."

"So I have to change here." I mused, then thought for a moment.

"You've to do nothing. I will just have to force my way into a shop. I'd just hoped to avoid that."

"There's no need. This shirt will do. Just don't take my mistreatment of it to heart." Undoing all the buttons down it's front I estimated which buttons I would be doing up again in a moment and asked Elijah to hold my robe closed since I needed to loosen the belt and move around beneath it.

Raising an eyebrow he stepped into me and did so. Somewhat distracting me with his closeness as I draped the shirt around the back of my legs so I could grip where I needed to from each side of my body. Then slid it up and over my bum beneath my now loose robe, until I could securely button it where required. The result was a fixed covering of material across my chest like a strapless dress. Reminding Elijah to keep the robe closed I removed my arms from the sleeves and let the shoulders fall down to where the shirt was secured. Assisting Elijah in lowering the robe slightly more before I continued to button down the front of the shirt. I then encouraged Elijah to lower the robe as I went. He obeyed and then I asked him to take the robe altogether before I wrapped the long sleeves of his shirt around my waist and half tied, half tucked it securely around me. The result was a strapless dress with some shape. I was covered and comfortable, only needing to adjust how the material closed in around my body. The lower front and back section made the dress very decent. While the sides of my legs were more on display where the cut of the shirt raised. Finished adjusting my make-shift dress I looked up at Elijah's face. He appeared mesmerised. I hoped it was just in compliment of my handiwork.

"Perfect," his single word made me nervous. Obviously I was suitably dressed to be seen in public. But men found the sight of women in their shirts sexy. While this construction wasn't the typical image. It was still his shirt.

"It'll do." I said brightly. Ignoring any implication in his perfect.

"It'll more than do." Shutting the boot Elijah offered me his arm. "Shall we?" My eyes took in his offered arm critically before I made the slightest accent to his offer by placing my hand in the crook of his elbow, rather than committing to the complete curling of my forearm in the space.

In no time we were back on the road, eating as we went. We all travelled in companionable silence until about midday when we stopped again for a toilet break and more food. Soon stopping again at a shopping centre Elijah took me in to get some clothes. I felt sorry for Jonas having to wait around, but I supposed it was better than having to accompany me. Elijah and I weren't long as I made it adamant I only required the basics. Klaus might even have me back with him somewhere after tomorrow. There was no need to splurge. Instead I'd gathered some comfortable shorts and a few singlet tops and under wear. Elijah had insisted on some nice flats so I wouldn't have to venture out again barefoot, so I relented and hastily tried the first and most comfortable looking pair on. They fit so I deemed them to suffice and then we were on the move again. Only once did we have to back track because Elijah thought I could do with a light cardigan and we'd passed the hygiene essentials like toothbrushes and paste in our hurry. Jonas hadn't required any clothes himself for some reason, but I had to assume he'd need a toothbrush so made sure to grab two. Seeing as Elijah had his belongings in the boot another for him was unnecessary. To finish off our shop I found some deodorant before we practically flew through the check out. From then on it took only fifteen minutes for me to change in the ladies, Elijah to buy us all some drinks, and for us to close in on Jonas and our ride. A quick adjustment of our seating arrangements and we were off. Jonas now in the back so he could stretch out and sleep soon, while Elijah and I sat up the front, the Original vampire at the wheel.

Having taken notice of my hair at our last stop I set about removing pins and combing my fingers through the length to try and settle it down. Movement from Elijah caught my eye and his hand withdrew from his jacket offering me a comb. I thanked him and took it but stared at it a few moments. With my hair, the state it was in and it's length, not to mention thickness I could tell this was going to be fun, and time consuming to boot.

"So, we're sticking with Plan C right?" Though I was looking forward, my head tilted as I began running the comb through a section of hair, I felt Elijah look at me. "I'm just wondering," I explained. "Because I could be killed now. It's somewhat safer for the murderer since we've kind of been dealt this odd road trip, I just thought it might have changed things. We could even run again even though you'd just about committed yourself to killing me yourself." I turned my head and my eyes locked with his despite the movements he was making to drive the car. It was unnerving and I glanced forward at the road and it's traffic a few times before accepting that we'd all be fine. What I wasn't so accepting of was his curious expression. The longer he considered me the more nervous I became.

"Plan C is still the most viable way to proceed," he started smoothly. "If we were to change course I'd have to wait to kill you yet, due to the vampire blood in your system. But you are right. Things have changed. We could run while we've got the chance. It's possible to escape Klaus temporarily now. It wouldn't be for as long as I had initially intended for you. But if I could lighten the burden on you by taking your life I would. If you've had enough, it's understandable." Elijah kept my gaze until I shied away and stared forward. "If you would rather die than Klaus and be done with his torment, I will honour your request."

"No." I assured him softly. "I didn't mean anything by mentioning going on the run again. I just used it as an example of how things have changed now. I want Klaus put-down." As soon as I said it I wished I'd worded it better. I opened my mouth to apologise but Elijah cut me off.

"Don't, re-neg how you feel." Bashful I turned my head to him and we looked at each other a moment.

"He's still your blood."

"Only half." His voice held some gruffness.

"That doesn't matter. You know that." I countered kindly as I began watching the road ahead again. "So we're to just keep on the move until Klaus turns up?"

"It seems so."

"He's trusting you a great deal. Jonas too. I'd have thought sending Greta with us would have been smarter." Elijah nodded.

"Klaus has not informed me of this himself, but Jonas has. You and Klaus are connected." I turned my face back to him again. "Magically, that is. It was a bond created so that he could, educate you when the moment illuminated any of your incorrect behaviours, according to Klaus of course. Knowing this I cannot with any certainty keep you and he apart. He would find you. With an astounding accuracy I'm told. We'll no-doubt see a display when he catches up with us. So Klaus is likely to be most comfortable with this current arrangement. There's very little room to move for anyone to defy him. You could be killed of course but not until vampire blood leaves your body. Which leads me to believe he'll make contact before this to ensure Jonas and I keep you safe and from turning." I remember Jonas telling me how Klaus would be able to tell when I was causing trouble. That was way back when I was having my first pregnancy test. In actuality it wasn't that long ago, but after all that had happened it sure felt that way. Something else in what Elijah'd just said caught my attention and I stopped combing.

"How can you have offered to steal me away again if you know you can't?" My voice was toned with hurt that I'd been taken for a ride. Even though it was one I wasn't interested in.

"I did say temporarily, Elena. Though Klaus would track you easily, there would still be some delay."

"The impression I got, was that temporarily meant it would be for at least a little while, at best. Not-." I paused frowning. "How long were you referring to?" I shifted in my seat so I could watch all of Elijah's response.

"Elena," his tone compelled me to see reason. I didn't respond verbally. Just kept quiet and openly watched him. When I didn't respond Elijah glanced at me, then back to the road before sighing and setting his gaze on me. "Three days, perhaps." He admitted. Dead, in three days. Goosebumps lazily pricked my skin and thick silence settled between us. Neither disconnected our locked gazes, not even to watch the road ahead. I was aware of Elijah searching my face, his own displaying a mixture of confusion, hesitance and concern. The tension grew, but I was unsure of what exactly it stemmed from. I'd been somewhat put-out that I'd assumed incorrectly of Elijah earlier, and then aggravated that his words had seemed misleading. But in his honesty I'd taken a curve ball. Now I was half mad at myself, and half afraid that I hadn't been consciously aware that I was going to die. Delaying Klaus meant I'd had time ahead of me. Now, aiding Klaus, in an off key way I was sealing my death. Only now I wondered how far it was till the next full moon. Jonas cleared his throat behind us and we both turned to acknowledge him, breaking eye contact.

"Sorry to interrupt."

"It's fine." I assured, then saw Jonas glance from me to Elijah.

"How's our schedule moving? Any stops I need to be alert during for this evening?"

"If it suits both of you we'll stop for some food around nine." Elijah left open-ended which Jonas and I both agreed to. "Apart from that, the aim is to cover some decent mileage between now and tomorrow morning."

"I'll take advantage of the miles then. Just don't let me sleep through dinner," he announced through smooth laughter and shifted about in the back seat while Elijah and I turned our attention front once more and I to my hair.

Our previous silence seemed to continue where we left off, minus the staring. I was still conflicted on what my issue with the misrepresentation was. Was it the appeal of spending time with Elijah again, and making the most of it, being denied of me? Or perhaps it was overall the reality of my approaching death? Hearing that one path could lead to my death in three days time forced me to consider my mortality. If I was pregnant and Klaus got what he wanted I would die come the next full moon. I'd offered and accepted the possibility of Elijah ending me before. I was comfortable and had no issue with it. But now I felt differently. I was, scared. How had I gone from being so accepting of death to fearing it? I was going to die soon.

I'd finished de-tangling my hair some half an hour prior and the sky had begun to darken before Elijah finally broke the silence.

"Are you mad at me?" He murmured. Leaning against the car door I rested my head on the glass.

"No," came my bland answer in just as low a tone due to Jonas intending to sleep. Again we were silent. I could sense the grim quirk of Elijah's mouth despite not looking at him.

"I apologise for giving you the wrong impression earlier. It seemed more appropriate to leave the sordid details out. Running to spend some few days together doing lovely things appealed to me as much as I thought it would you. Ensuring the idea that your remaining time could prove enjoyable took precedence over anything else."

"I told you I'm not mad at you."

"Your silence tells me something's wrong. If you're not mad at me what is it?" Elijah's tone was concerned.

"Not you." I stated simply.

"I think we've established that." He pointed out wryly, but not being smart about it. Rather, he was eager to hear my actual problem than what it wasn't. "Care to talk about-"

"No, thank you." Silence erupted between us again until Elijah gently cleared his throat.

"I can hear your heartbeat." He was trying to reason with me now and I turned my head to look at him.

"You don't have to listen." My hand then felt around the lower sides of my seat till I found out how to adjust it while Elijah chuckled sadly. As the sound died out slowly I altered the angle of the back rest of the seat as well as slid it forward slightly.

"I do." He assured me. "You know I do." Unimpressed with him I continued looking forward in annoyance while fiddling. "Why are you afraid?" I didn't acknowledge his question with a response, instead focussing on leaning back and assessing the comfort of my handiwork. "Elena?"

"Leave it." I thought he was going to in the time it took him to respond again.

"I can't." Opening my mouth to respond that he most certainly could he cut me off. "Rather, I wont." Inhaling a deep breath I composed myself and, half exhausted with the knowledge of how this questioning would go, settled back against the adjusted seats.

"Elijah. Last night, in the back seat. I didn't make an issue of it." I led in diplomatically. "Because I couldn't, and I think that's why you pushed me to stay, with you. Because you probably knew I didn't want to make a scene. This. Us three in the car doesn't need to become awkward because of you and I disagreeing, which has happened of late. With good reason too." I assured. "It wouldn't be fair on Jonas to put up with any tension between us. Since right now I don't want to talk about it. I think it's best you stop asking." Proud of myself and how I handled my tone I felt a little more adept at navigating Elijah's need to know everything about me.

"So long as your heartbeat speaks as it is currently I'm going to be concerned. Why not put me at ease? Doing so may be therapeutic for you."

"We're not discussing this. No, Elijah." My soft voice told him adamantly.

"What I would give for you to be as open now as you were earlier." His wistful statement compelled me to loll my head to face him. His dark eyes were on mine, disappointment obvious along with his sympathy for whatever was troubling me. "It was most welcome after your efforts to shut me out of late."

"Will you stop pushing at me, please." I hissed, mainly to keep my voice low to not disturb Jonas.

"Perhaps I would if you weren't pushing me away again. And so soon after we'd reconnected."

"We were obligated to connect. You're attachment to me has been fed, but nothing has changed. I've tried to always be clear about that Elijah." My bored tone inflected how little I wanted to continue this conversation.

"What we had to do? I wasn't aware it was such a trial for you." Elijah's voice turned sharp. "It sure didn't seem all that, unpleasant for you. In fact you appeared to be quite free of everything, for a time. It felt as though it did you and I a service. Compelling you to be open with me once again. I read you loud and clear then. What you're continuing to dictate now doesn't match up."

"You know what I meant by had. I don't want to have this conversation Elijah. Just leave it." My voice pleaded with him.

"A little awkwardness never killed anyone." When I didn't respond and merely watched him instead, Elijah cleared his throat. "Nor did conversation."

"This one just might," I announced with resignation. "Elijah. You and I, are still as we were. Before last night. We're working together. Yes, we connected, and no I wasn't adverse to it. But it doesn't mean nor change anything. I'm, sorry." Though my words were blunt I really was sorry. I was always sorry. I'd known having sex with Elijah would highlight what we felt for each other. Would give Elijah more hope. We were connected, and I'd been very forthcoming throughout. I just wished he wouldn't pick it apart now when I couldn't allow him to build upon anything. He should know that and keep well clear of anything that simply couldn't be between us.

"You think you can dissuade me, yourself? Elena, surely I don't have to remind you again that you need me. You can't ignore that. Nor will I allow you to. Not even your lies about any meaning extending from sex. I was there and I saw everything you deny. Felt everything. You love me." His tone was demanding though nearly silent. "As I you." His words, while they'd been said before. The confessions of his heart, his very being just seemed to poor out between us and it alarmed me. I hated this, what he did to me. What he wanted from me when I didn't want to lead him on. And yet, I realised with certainty in my frustration and growing wave of fear that once again built within me, I was definitely afraid to die. But now I knew why. It was because I didn't want to lose him. If I died in three days, or during the next full moon there would be no more Elijah. He would go on of course. But I would no longer and right now that pained me more than it seemed leaving my family in the same circumstances. But I was doing what I was doing for them. So I knew my actions would always though unbeknownst to them covet the rest of their lives. What I'd done, my spirit would be with them in some form or another. My sacrifice gave me comfort in my loss of them. But there was nothing in comparison for Elijah. I had nothing to cling to where he was concerned. I would be here, connected with him so intensely yet having to keep my distance. For everyone's sake, not only my own. Then, I would be gone. I didn't want that. I didn't want to go. Not when I loved him and knew how he loved me. His pushing and ability to get right underneath my skin as much as it irked me was something I loved about him. About us. Denying us forever, would leave him incredibly lonely. It had already done so to me and the time that had passed till now was nothing in comparison. We had memories. I supposed that was something. But whether I was selfish now or not. I didn't want that. I wanted to be with him, and I think I wanted it forever.

"See what I mean? Now this trips awkward." I hissed again as my stressed heart beat pounded deafeningly in my ears. I was reeling from my emotional epiphany. How the hell had this happened? Working hard I allowed anger into my voice but kept the overall volume down. "What am I supposed to say to that if anything I say is going to be deciphered to suit you? Then if I don't say anything, you'll take it as me accepting your interpretation."

"I'll take anything from you as it is. I don't create the truth, just unearth it. You have a knack for being cryptic." His tone finished admiringly as his expression turned adoring. "It's just one facet of you that tells me you care. So go on," he encouraged. "I care about you. Tell me what's frightening you so. I want to help, if I can." The worry in his voice carried some desperation now. He must have picked up on my increased stress. So we were back to that.

"That's just it. You can't. Please leave it alone." I didn't realise the tears that had welled in my eyes until one broke free and slid down my cheek. Angrily I blinked the remaining moisture away and swiped at the offending liquid running free. Elijah reached a hand over and rested it on my leg closest him just above the knee in comfort while his concerned eyes seemed to dart all over me. He was trying to decipher my fear without my help. Rubbing his thumb back and forth above my knee now eased my emotions though not the speed of my heart, and I stared. I took in his hand, my leg and focussed on the sensation. I needed to start immersing myself in what intimacies left between us were allowed. I was going to die and then there would be no more of this. Of his own volition, whether assuming my stare meant his touch was unwelcome Elijah soon removed his hand. But since it occurred after my heart rate had settled somewhat I doubt my discomfort had trumped his notion of comforting me.

Thinking back on the night we met only reinforced my doubt. I'd merely sloshed some boiling water on my hand and yet he had been compelled to ensure I was alright. Elijah didn't take any statement of mine, that I was okay, or that it was nothing as gospel. Unless he himself deemed it to be so, he would assess, treat and comfort me no matter the ailment. He cared too much, if that was possible. It was, sweet. Oh the contradiction in my feelings upon hindsight! I'd probably consider the conflict occurring right now as him caring and other nice things in the future. It was all in the bloody timing. That and I was difficult. But so were the times. My nostalgia must have influenced my expression for as I'd come to stare out the windshield again, I could see Elijah glancing at me curiously on a few occasions.

"What are you thinking that has you smiling so soon?" He wondered with an incredulous but breathy laugh. His voice sounded cautious, like this might just break the ice between us. My instant feeling was to say nothing. But somehow doing that seemed like we'd be destined for another argument.

"You actually." I supplied simply and without feeling, just to keep the topic casual. "How even though you aggravate me to no end at times. I do understand why you do and accept it."

"And this is a source of humour for you?"

"If I was smiling as a result it's because I'm fond of your character."

"Well that's a relief," he replied. The words gravelly and lightly humoured. Exhaling in a soft near silent laugh we then remained quiet, the tension between us lessened since it seemed we were finally going to ignore whatever was bothering me.

We drove in on comfortable silence after that. Only breaking it when we saw something interesting to comment on, but then it was dark so there was even less to see. Eventually I dozed off, re awaking to the feel of being watched but not uncomfortably so as I knew it was Elijah. In the glow from the dash I could see his face turned to my form and his eyelashes cast down somewhat, his eyes on me.

"Are you going to watch the road ahead at any point?" I queried sleepily.

"And subject my eyes to such demure sights in comparison?"

"More like fully observe what's going on around you."

"I think my observation skills are more than capable of watching the road and yourself simultaneously. I haven't had the luxury of watching you sleep of late." Elijah reasoned smoothly. "With the exception of last night."

"How long till we stop for food?" I asked as brightly as I could though sleepy, belying the emotion that swelled within me at being watched sleep by him. Wether Elijah picked up on my deliberate avoidance or not he chuckled and told me probably another hour, then that I should get some more sleep in the meantime. "Why? So you can keep watching me?" I accused with no real gusto behind the words.

"You don't have to be asleep for that." Elijah's voice turned gravelly and sent a shiver up my spine. "But I will continue to do so, yes. I'll always watch over you." My resulting frown while not visible to him ached. How was I supposed to comfortably get back to sleep now? Knowing he was watching. That he was getting something out of doing so that might only encourage him and his affections. Without another word I half turned onto my side and now facing away, tried to ignore him and get some more sleep.

Dinner turned out to be McDonalds. Elijah's presence at the establishment both odd and entertaining in my opinion. Despite not actually entering the restaurant, his manner when talking to the order machine and the subsequent window tenders was surreal. It was like he was stooping to the level of normal people. McDonalds was fine and all. I preferred their food to other fast food chains. But even I found sitting in their restaurants unappealing. And I wasn't the sophisticated Original vampire here.

"I must still be sleeping. I'd never peg you as a customer of McDonalds." I commented as we moved along the drive-through to the payment window.

"Do you not like their food? You could have said something before we ordered. We'd come across somewhere else for dinner sooner of later."

"The food's fine. It's just, you. I would have thought your taste in fast food would only go as far as Thai or Chinese."

"Well, the restaurants themselves leave much to be desired. Even the newly decorated ones. But the food is good." I suddenly wished I hadn't commented at all. There was no need for me to be reminded of how compatible Elijah and I were.

"Speak for yourself," Jonas interjected from the back seat as though insulted. "McDonalds is an institution! At one stage I was eating there at least a couple of times a week. And devotedly sat inside. Shame on you, Elijah. Living in this country and not embracing it's finest fast food." He playfully roused on our driver.

"Did I not say the food was good?" Elijah defended humorously and some laughter bounded around within the car from all. "Surely that counts for something." Jonas repeated Elijah's justification sounding appalled.

"Apparently not." I quipped.

"All that might count towards the redemption you so sorely need, and I repeat might, is if this is your shout."

"What a relief." Elijah responded smoothly. "That I can do. And how convenient. I've been itching to offload my money."

After an entertaining dinner the three of us settled into silence again and, apparently content with a full stomach Jonas started snoring in the back.

"Doesn't take much to please him, it seems."

"No," I trailed off in agreement. "Do you think I can get out and stretch my legs properly tomorrow?" Elijah nodded.

"If all goes well tonight. We can stop for a couple of hours somewhere for lunch, in which time you can free yourself from the confines of the car."

"Great." I responded eagerly.

"We'll be back on the road throughout the afternoon, so be sure to take especial advantage if your legs are restless."

"Mhmm." Shifting in my seat with the intent to sleep during our night's driving I got comfortable.

"Did you want your robe? In case you get chilly." Denying him any need I might have for it I turned away from him again and settled. "Goodnight, Elena."

"Goodnight."