Chapter 8: Falling Apart (Part 1)

When Jin stepped into Kazuya's house along with Jun, he finally understood what was wrong with him. He was completely passed out on the couch.

"I found him like that on the floor when I came to check up on him. I just…wanted to know how he was doing. All I did was drag him over there. But I smelled his breath; it's obvious what's happened. That's why I need you to stay here Jin so you can keep an eye out for him."

"I'm just a kid; I can't stop him from doing things."

"Your presence is enough. Besides, I've seen him like this before, you have nothing to worry about—he's completely harmless, and almost completely incoherent so don't pay attention to anything he says, okay? Just make sure he doesn't do anything silly and get himself hurt."

"I'll do what I can."

"I'm really sorry to put all of this on you," Jun said with a sigh. "I know you're scared. If it becomes too much for you, just call me. I'll come right over no matter what."

"You don't have to worry about me—I'll be okay."

"It's alright to be afraid, you know. Now, let's just stay here for tonight. I'm sure nothing big will happen, but still…"

The night was extremely uneventful. Besides the fact that Jin found himself wrapped up in Jun's arms as they fell asleep that night, nothing special occurred. In fact, by the next morning, whatever initial fears Jin had was completely alleviated. Kazuya hadn't even so much as moved from his current position. Even after Jun left for work, it all seemed the same. He heard movement from the couch after a while and Jin was quickly alerted.

"Um…Kazuya?" Jin asked. Maybe I should say something more…urgent. "Aren't you going to be late for work?"

Jin waited for the other to answer and to his surprise, he did.

"It doesn't matter," Kazuya said slowly, "I'm the CEO—I'll do what I want. Besides, such a position…is too much power."

"Too much power?" Jin asked in a confused manner.

"Sometimes…I wish everything could stay as it is. When I close my eyes, if I dream hard enough, sometimes I can see a future painted in gold, but when I come back to reality…that glittering gold turns into a cold and lasting darkness."

I don't understand…but I guess it figures…maybe he's still a little intoxicated…

"Was it fate that Jun found you on that day?" Kazuya continued, "...I don't fully understand everything, but I do know that I don't mind having you around, I don't mind Jun…It's almost as if we're…"

Jin sat on the carpet then as the other continued to ramble.

"Today I've just woken from that dream and no matter how hard I try, it will never be reality."

Jin watched as the other slowly, but surely began to sit up on the couch; he held his forehead gingerly with the soft part of his palm. Because of the dimness of the room, there was no way to tell where he was looking exactly. However, despite this, he felt Kazuya's gaze on him. An involuntary shiver ran down his spine. He didn't understand why, but suddenly the air had gone cold.

"Jin, so you're here."

Shouldn't he already know that? Jin thought incredulously.

"What are you doing here?"

"Jun told me to keep an eye on you, that you were harmless even drunk and that you just needed to sleep it off."

"Hm, that naïve woman—she thinks I'm harmless…"

"Do you know something that she doesn't?"

"I know of my curse—one of my own making. I'm far from harmless."

"Kazuya," This is my chance! "Are you going to hurt Jun?"

The silence that ensued was so long that eventually Jin realized that the other must have dropped off once again. The other's breathing had slowed to a point that Jin knew it must have been so.

"Jun…," Kazuya mumbled under his breath, "…like a daisy that will soon be uprooted…and left to wither and die…"

"What does that even mean? This is no time to be vague," Jin said as frustration began to color his tone. "Kazuya?"

Jin sat there for what felt like an eternity, but the other never responded back. The only thing he could do was wait. It wasn't like Kazuya could do anything too drastic in such a state. Jun was safe out there wherever she was as long as Kazuya was nowhere near. Long hours passed before he heard any movement from the other at which time Kazuya seemed as if he hadn't known the other was even there. Jin felt like he was just going around in an annoying, monotonous circle.

"Yes, for the last time, I'm Jin, and you already know that I'm here, you flaming idiot—Now, I have something important—

"What did you call me?"

Jin was taken aback when he heard the other's raised voice, but he decided to hold his ground. "I called you an idiot." What exactly could a drunken fool do to him anyway?

"You brat, who taught you manners? I brought you into my home and this is how you repay me?"

"Oh, shut-up like you don't deserve it. Besides, if you weren't trying to impress Mom, then you wouldn't have done it anyway." Jin didn't understand the silence afterwards as he waited for an immediate comeback, but something crossed his mind as hard as a lightning strike touching ground. Crap…that was a slip-up—I spoke too soon!

"Hey, say something, would you?" Jin asked.

"What did you say?"

"What?"

"I said, what did you say before?" he asked again shakily.

"Jun."

"Liar."

Great, so he chooses this time to become lucid. "How would you know? You're probably just hearing things."

"It all makes sense now! You're her son from the future who somehow time traveled to the past in order to disrupt her relationship with me!"

That…sounds so farfetched now that I hear it out loud! How would anyone draw that conclusion from just one slip-up? "That's not…"

"Ha! Who's the idiot now, amnesia kid? You'd believe anything someone told you on a whim. You should see your face."

It was then that Jin let out a sigh of relief. He was still safe. But still, to jump that kind of conclusion…I have to be more careful.

"I have someplace I should be…I have to tell Jun something."

"No way! I'm not gonna' let you use the car. At this point, even I can drive better than you."
"Don't compare my skills to yours. I'm going and you can't stop me."

When he stood, he might have fallen straight on his face had he not caught himself.

"You're wrong! I can stop you!" Jin said as he gathered his courage.

Kazuya glanced over at the other in a confused manner just as he was tackled to the ground.

"You can't stop me!" Kazuya declared defiantly.

Jin leaped out of the way when Kazuya who was still on the ground tried to kick him. Jin immediately positioned himself in front of Kazuya who was currently failing miserably at climbing back to his feet.

"You have to get through me first," Jin announced.

"Get out of my way," Kazuya growled at the other.

Kazuya had managed to climb to one knee and now was at a height similar to Jin's. Jin was unprepared for when the other managed to grasp his entire face and shove him away a good distance, but this stunt forced Kazuya off balance and he was flat on his stomach once again. Jin easily recovered from the attack—it wasn't as if falling on a carpet as soft as this would really affect him. Jin thought of a clever way to get the advantage. Instead of standing in front of Kazuya, he bent down and clamped on to his legs so that it'd be impossible for the other to attempt standing up again.

"You brat!" Kazuya exclaimed.

Kazuya commenced to attempting to push the other off again. It seemed impossible. Despite everything, Jin found himself trying to hold back laughter. Kazuya eventually rolled over so that he could use his hands to try to peel the other off. The harder he tried, the tighter Jin's grip became.

"Fine!" Kazuya spat at the other.

Jin felt himself being flipped over again. To his amazement, Kazuya had begun to crawl towards the front door using only his arms. It was then that Jin positioned himself differently. Instead of lying on the floor and grabbing his legs with his entire body, he stood up while still holding Kazuya's legs with his arms. He had good enough footing on the carpet and could better pull against Kazuya's crawling attempts. This was all becoming quite ridiculous.

"Get off me, you brat!"

Jin couldn't hold back his laughter any longer.

"This isn't funny!" Kazuya cried out, "I'm just trying to get to that damn car! Why is it so impossible?"

At some point, Jin's grip gave out and Kazuya took that moment to scramble to his feet only to trip over himself and make another crash landing with the floor. Jin was back on him in a second.

"I can do this all day!" Jin said loudly to the other.

Obviously, Kazuya could not "do this all day" as his struggling became weaker and weaker until he stopped altogether. Jin let out a sigh of relief. His grip loosened and he relaxed on the carpet to regain some feeling in his now numb arms. That man is crazy. Barely an hour passed and Jin had to do it all over again.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" Jin called out.

"Car…car, come to me…"

"It's not gonna' come," Jin said in hopes of dashing the other's persistence.

Every other hour, Jin found himself in a tussle with Kazuya. When Kazuya ever managed to climb to his feet, Jin would tackle him down once again. Actually, it was kind of fun in Jin's eyes. Jin could never play such games with his mother since she was a woman and it would be unseemly. He also didn't have any siblings so things as random as this would never occur in his normal life. But here he was tackling, rolling, falling constantly all over the living room floor. They wound up sprawled on the floor after many hours came and went. Kazuya had simply passed out again, laid out on his back and Jin who was exhausted stayed there as well just in case the other tried anything. Kazuya was now snoring so steadily that Jin doubted that anything more would happen that night. For a while, Jin stared up at the darkening ceiling as his breathing came back to normal. It wouldn't seem right falling asleep on the floor like this, but it was rather tempting. He thought of his room—cold and empty with nothing in it to say that it was his. Jin hated to admit it, but his presence near Kazuya was far more comforting than that room.

"Make no mistake, I still kind of hate you," Jin said as he began to crawl closer to the other, "And your breath smells like alcohol."

But he didn't want to be alone that night. He didn't feel like feeding his mind with reasons why he should hate one person. He wanted to imagine for once that he was part of a family, one that loved him. He wanted to believe that he had the coolest father in the world who loved him deeply. Perhaps this night, he could believe in that dream. Jin silently crawled under the other's arm and fell happily asleep in his father's warmth.

/

"Ow, my head," Jin heard Kazuya groan the very next morning.

Jin glanced over at him and realized that he had at some point turned to his side. Judging from where his arms were positioned, he must have been using his hands to hold his head.

"Don't worry. I'm sure it'll go away," Jin said before he could catch himself. What am I doing…? He's still…my enemy, I guess.

"It is of my own doing," he said solemnly, "I do things rashly without ever thinking of the consequences."

"That doesn't sound like you at all," Jin said truthfully.

Jin meant it. This was the same calculative guy who instead of acting upon his initial distrust of him, waited to gather more information, before making a final decision. This was the same guy who never did anything without thinking of how Jun would react—at least so far minus this incident.

"How would you know? Having only met me for a few days at best. You trying to comfort me…that is very unlike you."

"Who's making assumptions now? You've only just met me too."

"But it's different, kid. I can read you like an open book. I knew immediately that you didn't like me at all, that there was something that you took offense to, but I could never figure out what or why. Was it something that I had already done or was it something you foresaw me doing? I'm almost certain that it's the latter. Maybe you already saw a man who would bring ruin to all those around him. If that's so, then you have a right to hate me."

It was just as Jin had suspected, Kazuya knew basically everything. He had given away too much. Jin turned his head to the direction opposite of Kazuya.

"Don't think I didn't already try to separate myself from her in the past, but the more I try to push her away the harder she clings, the less resolve I have to do so. You, a mere boy, could not have convinced her of anything. She's quite stubborn."

When Kazuya sat up, Jin realized that there were covers on them. Apparently, it was the same for Kazuya who looked at them confusedly.

"When did these get here?" Kazuya asked. Then he looked to Jin who shrugged. "Jun must have been here last night. She's probably at work now."

"So you're missing another day of work?" Jin questioned.

"It shouldn't be a problem really. When my grandfather still owned the company, instead of keeping all the natural power of being a CEO for himself, he decentralized it. That way, even if the CEO were not there, the company could still operate for a time on its own."

Jin looked at the other with a raised eyebrow. Most of it had flown right over his head.

"In other words," Kazuya said noticing the other's confusion, "I don't absolutely need to be there."

"You're…still trying to see Jun, aren't you?"

"Why bother her?" Kazuya asked as he took the covers off of himself, "I'm going to take a shower."

Jin watched as the other stood up. His balance was still off, but at least he was able to walk. It didn't take long for Jin to hear the sounds of rushing water. He pulled the covers closer. So Jun had been here? I missed my chance…I could have talked to her in private that time if I had just woken up. His stomach growled, but there was nothing he could do for it. Having checked the kitchen already, he knew that it was bare, similar to all the other rooms in this place. There wasn't much color around the house even after their mall trip. Everything seemed muted and devoid of any personality despite the few decorations. Kazuya's room had consisted of a bed and a dresser. For a man who probably had a lot of money, his home was pretty sparsely furnished. Either he was being thrifty or didn't care enough to buy extra things for his home.

When the water shut off and Jin didn't see the other come back out to the living room, he knew that he must have went to his room. With a sigh, Jin crawled from under the blanket and folded it up. It was like being snatched away from a waking dream. Kazuya was the only father he was ever going to have and this whole time he had labored to rid Jun of him. Now he felt the weight of the impossibility. Their fates seemed too intertwined. What would have happened if he had succeeded? Jun would have been hurt either way. Maybe how things turned out was the best possible way. Jin shook his head. He couldn't start thinking like that. He had to do something.

For now though, he was still hungry. He trudged over to Kazuya's room to find that he was in his own bed once again. Jin wasn't an expert on hangovers and drunkenness, but was it really supposed to last so long? Was two days normal?

"Kazuya…" Jin said cautiously as he approached the other who still held his head while turned on his side, "Aren't you hungry or something?"

His eyes seemed so unfocused that Jin thought that perhaps this was a bad time. He began to step back.

"You still have those fifty dollars I gave you. Use that if you're starving."

"But I don't know where to go."

"You really want me to drive you somewhere?"

"Umm…no, I guess not."

Kazuya sighed exasperatedly, "Can you use a phone?"
"I guess."

"There's a phonebook. Look through it and find some place that will deliver. There should be a sheet of paper in the front of the phonebook, with the home address—that's all you need to make an order."

"But I've never made an order before."

"Then let this be your first time."

"But I don't know how to use a phonebook."

"You're killing me."

"What?"

"I'm literally dying inside."

"Are you alright?"

"No, now go get that phonebook! I'll order something," Kazuya growled.

Jin leaped right into action when he sensed that the other was losing patience. He came back in no time with the things that he had wanted. Kazuya seemed to know where to turn without even looking in the table of contents, at least that's what it seemed like in Jin's eyes. Of course, the book was in alphabetical order and one could guestimate which page they should turn to on just that information. The phonebook was a book of telephone numbers Jin realized. It donned on him that it probably would not have been so hard to find a number and order something that way. Jin found it comical the way Kazuya spoke on the phone. Jin knew the other to be peeved, but he talked as if he was in the best of moods when he spoke to the folks on the other end. He spoke so clearly that even a partially deaf person could have understood what he was saying.

"What are you smiling at?" Kazuya said as he ended the call.

"You sound weird on the phone."

"Well, if they get the order wrong, you know they have to be utter idiots. Go wait out in the living room for them. They said it'll take fifteen minutes…but it's really thirty."

"What happens when they come?"

"I would say use your money, but here," Kazuya said as he went into his top dresser drawer and pulled out some more cash, just enough to foot the bill, "Just give it to the delivery guy, take the food and it's over. Got it?"

"Okay."

"Don't bother me anymore," Kazuya said wearily as he returned to his position on the bed.

"You know, I bet if you actually ate something, you'd feel a lot better," Jin said despite himself, but Kazuya seemed so much in pain.

"Whatever. You're beginning to sound like Jun. Get out of here already and close the door on your way out."

Jin did as he was told and scrambled out of the room. He waited in the living room patiently and after exactly thirty minutes, the pizza man came, Jin gave him the money, and finally took in the food. There really was nothing to it. Because he was so hungry, it made the teriyaki pizza smell that much more tantalizing. He thought of Kazuya as he finished his first slice, then the second slice, and a third slice. Surely, Kazuya was hungry. Jun had charged him with looking after him and making sure he didn't do anything stupid. Wasn't starving to death considered stupid? When he could take it no longer, Jin took up three slices and placed it on a plate. Now for the hard part. He took a deep breath as he stood in front of the closed door. It's either now or never. Jin twisted the doorknob and the door opened. The temperature dropped suddenly when he stepped in yet there was no fan or anything—why was it so cold? His hands, no, his entire body shivered as he crept over to the dresser. Kazuya was so completely under his covers the he could no longer see his condition. It was pretty cold in there. It seemed sensible to take refuge in a warm place. Maybe the thermostat was broken in the room. Maybe the vents just weren't working correctly here.

"Hey, Kazuya, I brought you some food. I know you said you weren't hungry, but you have to be." He placed the plate on top of the dresser.

"I thought I told you to stop bothering me," Kazuya said from under the covers. "You shouldn't be here. Just go to the living room or something."

"Why is it so cold in here?"

"I don't know," Kazuya snapped, "I can't explain anything."

"You could catch a cold staying in here. You have other rooms you know."

"I know you mean well, but when I tell you to leave, you should leave."

"O-okay," Jin was shivering uncontrollably.

Jin finally backed off and once again scrambled out of the room. There was nothing he could do and he didn't understand what was happening. Jun would come later on today, Kazuya knew. Maybe she knew something that could help him.

Jin waited alone in the living room for hours. He hadn't felt like turning on the television or even thinking of some way to advance his plans. He was only worried. He told himself that there was no way that he could like such a man. But still…It was quiet. A little too quiet for Jin's liking, but the darkness was comforting. No one had bothered to open the blinds and so the sun's rays were kept at bay. Good. Sometimes the brightness could be too much for him. He looked up suddenly when he heard the front door being opened and then as it was closed.

"Is anyone up?" Jun's voice called out.

He heard Jun's footsteps walk into the living room before long.

"Jin? What are you doing all alone in the dark?"

When he didn't answer immediately, she walked over to the couch that he was sitting on and sat down beside him.

"It's Kazuya, isn't it? Did you guys get into a fuss or something?"

"No, it's not that. I think there's something wrong…He's been in his room all day."

"What? Tell me, did he eat anything?"

"I don't know. He ordered something for me, I gave him some of it, but I don't know if he ate it." Jin looked over at Jun when he realized that she had grown very quiet. "Jun?"

"Jin, just stay here," Jun said as she stood up. "Don't worry. Everything's going to be fine."

Jin watched the other disappear into the hallway. No doubt she was going to Kazuya's room. He didn't know what was happening, but he felt that he shouldn't get involved.

It was no longer quiet, though. He could hear their voices if he listened hard enough, but he felt like he was intruding on something. Jin covered his ears and closed his eyes. He didn't know how long he stayed like that. An eternity must have passed before someone roused him. It was Jun. What day was it? How much time had passed? Jin found that he no longer cared.

"Jin, would you like to hear a story?"

"No…I…," he paused when he finally looked up at Jun. She seemed to be on the verge of tears, "What happened? What did he do to you?"

"Please, listen to my story."

"A-alright."

Jun sat down next to him once again. "There was once a demon known simply as Devil who roamed the Earth freely, always searching for a human, a vehicle, if you will, who could help it reach its goal. Without a human host, the demon could not touch Earth, but disguised as a human, Devil could wreak havoc to his heart's content. Wherever Devil went, it left a path of destruction. It chose human after human unsatisfied with the results. All Devil had achieved were petty crimes and minor disruption, but nothing that was even close to its one true dream. One day, Devil came upon a boy who was on the verge of dying in a ravine. Devil watched from a distance, as the boy slowly bled to death. The child had been left with a gash so deep that even his ribs and heart lay exposed. Devil decided then that this would be his vessel; this would be the vessel that would eventually take him to his goal. The demon presented the boy with two choices—life or death. Of course, the boy chose life and the demon gave it to him. Life came with a price. The boy had inadvertently laid a curse upon the rest of his life—he had sold his soul to Devil. Every day Devil clawed at his sanity and relentlessly strove to drag his entire mind into darkness where he could then be controlled. But the boy had a strong will. He bore such a deep and lasting hatred towards his father who had left him to die in that ravine that Devil was powerless against it. Instead of fighting against it, Devil decided that he would help this child achieve his dream, but after that the demon would again begin progress towards its goal. Devil made the child stronger and stronger, knowing that eventually, it would benefit from his strength. The child's hate became so strong that it was unnatural. Had his father ever wanted to apologize, it would not have changed a thing. The boy grew into a man and by then, his mind was quite one track."

"A tournament was called and at the same time Kazuya was presented with the perfect opportunity to obtain the only thing he ever wanted out of life—his father's utter defeat. It was no contest. When his father lay motionless at his feet, it was the first time he could ever remember feeling joy. The boy, now a man, tossed his father down the very same ravine he had been forced to suffer through. It was perhaps the greatest moment of his life. But after such joy there was utter emptiness. Just like that, his reason for living had vanished. The resolve that he was so used to having was gone. To Devil, the man's fiery will to destroy his father was ephemeral at best. All it needed to do was wait. It pounced at the moment its host was at his weakest, when he was uncertain with what should happen next in his life. Devil supposed that this was it, this was the moment that it had been waiting for, but yet another obstacle stood in his way. A woman."

"He told me 'Had you not been there, I would have been lost. You gave me something that can never be repaid. Despite that, all I have ever done for you was made you worry and given you undue stress.' And I tried to correct his reasoning. I tried to reassure him that he was never a burden to me, that I would do anything for him. That if there was something that I could do, then I would do it. I've been such a good influence up until now—why couldn't things continue to be as they were. Then he told me, 'There's nothing that you can do, you've done enough already. Really, I'm just being selfish.' I asked him to explain himself, but when he tried, I couldn't understand it. If someone needs help, then it's alright for that person to ask for it. How can I get him to see that? You understand what I'm saying, don't you, Jin?"

It took Jin a moment to realize that Jun was looking at him waiting for an answer. He simply nodded to her.

"I know that he doesn't want me to get involved, but—I'm sorry, I guess this is all a lot to swallow. You're too young to really understand what I'm talking about. Look at me, I'm so pathetic, I should have some girlfriends right now who I've known since high school and call them up, right?"

"It's alright," Jin finally said, "I know you don't have anyone else to talk to."

"Well, it's getting late, Jin. You should go to bed. I know it's been another tough day for you. Um, I wanted to ask you, if you've gotten any of your memories back."

"No, not really."

"Nothing at all?"

Jin looked away from her.

"It's not that I'm trying to kick you out or anything, but Kazuya was right—as much as I want children, we'd make horrible parents. I'm at work all the time and so is he. And, well, you saw what happened today. I don't want to put you through that every day. You've hardly had any fun, right?"

"You're wrong. I have had fun. I've learned...nothing is ever perfect. We just have to make the best of what we already have." Before he knew it, he was using the word 'we' as if they had always been together.

"I'm really glad you feel that way. But you don't have to lie for my sake."

"I'm not lying."

"You really do like it here, huh. I never thought I'd find someone crazy enough to say it." She smiled gently. "I don't have any friends, but I used to. It's as if as soon as I got into a relationship with Kazuya—the life that I knew before vanished. The people who I was associated with started to keep their distance. Even my own family. It was as if the whole world was telling me that this was a bad idea. But here I am even at the risk of being isolated forever. Then you come out of nowhere and you accept everything the way it is without complaint, you accepted Kazuya and that's a very hard thing to do. If it's true that you really can't remember anything of your past, I would be honored to adopt you."

Jin was utterly surprised for two reasons: for one, this was his mother asking to adopt him and secondly, he never imagined being offered that. He hadn't known until that moment that some small part of him still believed that this was all a dream and that at some unknown point he would return to the real world. But it had been so long now—would it be alright to think that he would never go back? Did he even want to go back?

"It's a lot to swallow, isn't it? I wanted to tell you that for a while, but I didn't know when to say it. I asked Kazuya about it and he supported my decision."

"He did?"

"Of course he did. He likes you."

"He does?"

"When someone takes a bullet for you, it's hard to not notice."

"What do you mean? We didn't even know there was a third person."

"Well, he told me not to tell you this, but he knew there was a third person keeping an eye out on the two others that you saw. That's what he told the police. While he was being escorted to the deserted part of the mall, the man holding the gun to him slipped up and told him about it—apparently, this guy was a complete novice when it came to keeping his mouth shut. The novice had intended to intimidate him into being compliant. No matter what, they were going to get the money and they would make sure that you and Kazuya would not be a liability."

"I…didn't know."

"You weren't supposed to. Maybe I shouldn't have told you, but sometimes it can be hard to tell what Kazuya likes or doesn't like. I guess the longer you stay here, the better you'll get at it. Whatever is happening now—I'm sure it'll pass. It's not just me anymore—it's you too. When someone is in trouble, we help them."

"So how do we do that?"
"I don't know yet. But I'll come up with something."

"We'll come up with something."

"That's right," Jun said with a nod, "Let's just sleep on it for now."

The two of them retired to their beds. Jun, of course, shared a room with Kazuya. Jin could only imagine what that must have been like. Out of both of them, if anyone could fix things, she could. She could get him to do things even admit things when he normally wouldn't. It was quite impressive in Jin's eyes. The story that Jun had told him was too much to even believe. Maybe she had been talking figuratively. Maybe this Devil wasn't a real being. Maybe it was just some other side of Kazuya that was too frightening to discuss any other way. What was it he could do about it anyway? He wondered even if there was a solution. He spent the rest of the night mulling over and over the story. He wished there was something convenient that might have been mentioned there, but there was nothing. Nothing popped out at him. He wasn't sure when he fell asleep and dreams was a thing of the past—not when he hadn't given up. No matter what, he didn't want to give up.